Chapter 21
twenty-one
By the time I’m on the back of Beck’s bike on the way to Breaker’s, I’ve given myself anxiety with all the worst-case scenarios I’ve imagined.
When we finally pull into the driveway, I scramble off the back, not waiting for him to cut the engine.
I place my palm on the front door lock, and it barely beeps before I’m swinging the door open.
Laughter echoes through the open back door, and my heart slows a little bit.
“Jax?” I call, walking out onto the patio. He’s sitting around the fire pit with Breaker and Elijah, much like Beck and I were with his parents. As soon as my eyes find him, the vice around my heart releases.
“Hey, Mama. You guys have a good trip?” He says, smiling back at me.
“We did,” Beck says, his chest brushing against my back, his warmth saturating the air around us. I lean back into him without thinking, my body seeking the connection. His arm snakes around my waist, and he kisses my head softly.
“I’m glad. Pull up a chair, Break is just teaching me the meaning of life out here.” Jax jokes and Beck falls into the chair next to him. I kiss my boy on the cheek before walking back inside to find the bathroom.
Locking the door, I turn on the faucet and splash some cold water on my face.
I wish I had better control over my anxiety.
In my defense, it’s infinitely better than it was when I first left home.
I could barely bring myself to leave the safety of the motels we hid in.
Finding Grovewood was like finding nirvana.
I didn’t feel fear here the way I did everywhere else we stopped along the way.
My phone vibrates in my back pocket, and I slide it out, wondering who could be calling me.
Almost everyone I talk to is here in this house.
The screen lights up with a text from an unknown number.
I open the thread to see a dozen pictures of my friends with their families.
Elijah and Ember kissing while their twins swing at the park.
Everett holding their daughter while Kelsea browses the aisle at the grocery store.
Rory dances in her studio while Silas wobbles through.
Me and Ember talking over the counter at Grovewood Ink.
Breaker and Jaxon laughing on the back porch of this very house.
The last photo sends every nerve in my body into a tailspin.
It was obviously taken tonight, just before the sunset.
Someone has been watching me, watching us.
All of us. I knew Beckett had someone following me.
I’ve known for weeks. But he seemed more at ease lately, and I’m sure he assumed I would be pissed if I knew.
I was at first, but I understand his need to protect me.
But these photos aren’t surveillance. These are sinister.
A single message comes seconds later, and I gasp, the air in my lungs vaporizing.
Did you really think I’d let you go?
It takes every ounce of strength I have not to scream as I read it.
The pieces of my beautiful life here shatter around me as the blood rushing in my ears drowns out every other sound.
My heart pounds so hard I swear it will break through my ribs.
I slide down the cabinets until my ass hits the cold tile floor.
My phone vibrates in my hands again, and it falls, clattering to the floor.
“Fuck!” I whisper shout, picking it up and seeing the same unknown number calling.
My hands shake violently as I wage a war inside my mind about answering.
I could walk back outside, give this phone to Breaker and Beckett, and let them hunt him down.
I know they would. Beck would go to the ends of the earth to keep me safe.
But the one common image I can’t erase from my mind is the one thing stopping me now.
Their babies are in those pictures. Their children.
MY child. As much as I know my friends would jump into action to help me if I only asked, asking for that kind of help could put those innocent souls in danger.
And I will never put my safety before theirs.
If there’s anything I can do to keep this darkness from touching those babies, I have to do it.
The ringing stops but immediately starts up again. My fingers hover over the screen for only a second this time before I swipe to answer the call. Heavy breathing comes through the line, and my skin crawls. I can’t force any words from my mouth, too afraid they’ll be accompanied by vomit.
“Come on, Lil. I know you’re there.” Cooper’s voice comes through the speaker, and I swallow down a scream. All the work I’ve done to become stronger since I left him feels pointless, as if I’m still the same stupid girl lying on that floor in my own blood and tears the night I left.
“Cooper…” my voice is barely above a whisper, and I chastise myself internally for showing any weakness. My entire body vibrates with the nervous energy coursing through my veins.
“Did you really think I couldn’t find you? So fucking stupid. Willow Hawthorne? I know that’s the name you always had picked out if you ever had a daughter. You didn’t even bother to change the kid’s name.” Fire ignites inside my chest at the audacity he has to even mention Jaxon.
“What the fuck do you want?” I bite back, anger building inside me.
“I want my son, Lily. You thought you could take him, but he’s mine.” His voice is cold, like Jaxon is a possession he expects to be returned just because he orders it.
“Over my cold dead body, you piece of shit. Jaxon is my son. You will never-” I snap, panting with adrenaline, but he cuts me off.
“Save the theatrics, honey. Your cold, dead body is a given at this point. But you see, every president needs an heir to their legacy. You ran off with mine. I want him back.” He says it so matter of factly.
But he doesn’t know me anymore. I’m not the weak, sheepish girl he could manipulate so easily years ago. And I meant what I said. I’ll be dead and buried before he ever lays eyes on my son again.
“You will never see my son again, Cooper. You will die alone, drinking yourself into a stupor, regretting every single second of your miserable life. But you will never see my son again.” I’m tempting the devil.
I know how dangerous he can be. I’d be lying if I said he didn’t scare me anymore, but I don’t care. My hatred outweighs my fear.
“You listen to me, you stupid cunt. I will gut every single one of your so-called friends in the backwater town. You think they care about you? Nobody gives a fuck about you, Lily. I’m the only one who ever loved you, and you went and fucked that up too.
And when it comes down to it, the choice between saving their children and giving you up will be an easy one.
” His voice sounds savage and laced with venom.
His words are slurred and hurried at the same time.
I can almost guarantee he’s been mixing coke and liquor.
“Bring Jaxon to me, and I’ll leave them alone.
Keep fucking around and I will kill them all.
You’ve already seen how close I can get to them.
You think your little hacker buddy is the only one in the world with those skills?
You fucking him too? At least you’re good for that.
” There was a time his words would cut me open, leaving me bleeding just as badly as his fists always could.
But not anymore. There’s nothing I wouldn’t do to keep him as far away from my people as I possibly can.
“Where are you?” I force steel into my spine, knowing I’m going to make what will likely be a huge mistake. But I can’t put these people through the nightmares I’ve experienced at Cooper’s hands.
“There’s a warehouse off of Highway 61. You’ll recognize the Renegade colors hanging near the sign by the road.
Meet me there in two hours and bring me my son.
If you’re lucky, I’ll just make him watch you die instead of making him hold the blade.
If you fuck with me, Lily, you know what you’re in for.
You think you had it bad? Imagine the kind of living hell I can bring to that boy.
” He laughs viciously, making my skin crawl.
The line disconnects, and every ounce of adrenaline that’s been building in my body dumps into my veins.
This must be what a heart attack feels like.
I lean against the counter, my hands shaking and my legs feeling like they could give out at any moment.
Coughing out a sob, I cover my mouth quickly so no one hears me falling apart.
I have to pull it together. There’s no time for me to dissolve into my fear.
Knowing my sweet, paranoid friend, I know Breaker has a gun stashed in almost every room in the house.
Throwing open every cabinet, I dig through hand towels and rolls of toilet paper until I find the unassuming black box in the back corner.
I punch in the code I know he uses for his gun lockers downstairs, and the lock clicks open.
My hands shake as I grip the Glock 22, making sure the magazine is full and there’s one in the chamber before tucking it into the back of my jeans and standing.
Looking at myself in the mirror, I wonder how I got here.
I could never have imagined this is where my life would lead at 14, the last time I saw my parents, before the course of my life was altered forever.
I’m determined to end this bullshit ride with Cooper, one way or another.
Taking a deep breath, I pull my hair into a ponytail and square my shoulders. This ends tonight.
Opening the bathroom door, I stop short when I see Rory standing in the hall just feet away from me, clutching her son to her chest. Her mouth hangs open slightly, and a single tear rolls down her cheek.
I know she heard more than enough of that conversation, and I can’t imagine how it sounded, but I don’t have time to waste.
“Rory, I have to go. Please don’t say anything. I have to do this.” I beg, whispering desperately.
“You absolutely cannot do this, Willow. He will kill you! Have we all learned nothing from the ridiculous amount of danger we’ve all put ourselves in over the years?! You can’t go by yourself! You have to let us help you!” She whisper-yells back to me, bouncing slightly to avoid waking Silas.
“Listen to me, Rory. He had pictures of us, all of us. Of your children, Aurora. He will kill them, I don’t doubt that for a second.
Think of your husband! Look at your son.
Please! Can you put him at risk that way?
I can’t. I won’t do it. I love you all too much.
” Pleading with her to understand as I back away towards the front door, I know what I have to do, but they will hate me for this.
Jaxon may hate me for this, too. But I will never stop protecting him. Not until we are truly safe.
I take advantage of her momentary distraction as Silas squirms in her arms, and I sprint full force to the front door.
I grab her keys off the hook next to the door as she screams to the guys behind me, but before they can stop me, I slam my hand on the front security panel and initiate the emergency lockdown sequence for the house.
The doors and windows seal magnetically, only able to be opened after a full security check.
I know that will buy me at least the few minutes I need to get out of here and on the road.
Something like betrayal burrows into my gut, but I shove it down. There’s no time for emotions right now.
I climb into Rory’s Bronco, knowing it’s the only thing here with enough speed and power to get me where I need to go as quickly as possible.
Tearing down the driveway, gravel flying behind the truck, tears burn my eyes.
I wipe them away as quickly as they return.
The iron gate at the exit is closing quickly, but I don’t hesitate.
Pushing the gas to the floor, I break through the gate.
The metal on metal screeches loudly around me as the gate flies off the track.
Beckett will make sure that gets fixed. I know he will. Because he’s a good man.
He’s a good man, and I’m leaving him behind.
I know without a doubt this is a mistake, but I don’t see any other choice that doesn’t lead to putting the people I love in danger.
One way or another, the nightmare I’ve been so desperate to escape will end tonight.
And I know if something should happen to me, this family will always protect my son.
I’m determined to be the one who makes it out of here alive tonight.
Cooper doesn’t know me anymore, doesn’t know how hard I’ve worked to make sure I’m never a victim again.
I want to be there to watch my son grow into the incredible man he’s already becoming.
I want to see him go to art school and set this world on fire with all his big, beautiful dreams. My motivation feels so much more worthwhile than Cooper’s.
He’s only ever been fueled by hatred. For me and even more for himself.
I program the GPS to the location he gave me, knowing my friends will have the ability to track this truck, but I can only hope to end this as quickly as possible before they catch up to me.
My phone rings in the passenger seat, another trackable device, but I can’t answer it.
Beckett’s perfect face lights up the screen, but I already know what I’ll hear on the other end, and it will devastate me.
The ringing stops after a few seconds only to start up again.
My ringtone and the sound of my quiet sobs fill the small space.
Regret slithers around my heart, squeezing like a viper, poisoning my mind against this decision even though it’s too late.
“Please forgive me. Please, please, please.” I chant to the empty truck, letting my thoughts free into the universe.
My phone starts ringing again, and this time the face on the screen cracks my chest wide open.
My perfect boy, his smiling face looking at the camera.
I can’t take the idea of something happening to me and never hearing his voice again.
I slide to answer the call, putting it on speaker and staying silent.
“Mama, please. Don’t do this to me.” His voice is so fragile, sounding so much like the little boy I stole away from the devil all those years ago. I can’t listen to both of them begging me to stop, to slow down and change direction. The decision is already made.