Chapter 24
New Pharia City
What used to be Santa Fe, New Mexico
Brir
I gazed up at Arya as she plummeted from the sky. I could see the struggle in her eyes and knew that this was not the form she wanted. Her body contorted and twisted, bones cracking and reforming into the hulking form of an Ellid, the one she had to hide behind a more human-looking skin. But now, as she flew down towards me, I could see the sharp claws protruding from her paw-like hands and the rows of teeth lining her mouth. This was the creature she truly was, but society forced her to conceal it, hide it under a skin that was more pleasant for people.
Her deep purple scales glistened in the sunlight through the new shield she had just built. Her wings beat the air like a drum as she landed gracefully on the rooftop where we were. Her sharp claws dug into the concrete. Her tail whipped around, providing her balance. A single horn protruded from the crown of her head. Her piercing reptilian eyes scanned us, her jaw tight. I couldn’t help but be awed at the sight of her before me.
We huddled behind the shimmering barrier Arya had trapped us inside. Merrick vibrated with raw emotion beside me, his mate wrapped up in his arms. She had conjured this barrier with a flick of her wrist, and we could not stop her.
Arya’s paws dug into the rough concrete as her body convulsed. Her tail lashed behind her, leaving deep scratches in its wake. I could feel the struggle within her as she fought to control her transformation and return to her more human-like form. The veins on her neck bulged and pulsed—the sound of bones cracking filled the silence around us.
The shield kept us all from getting closer. The Rizugae on the ground looked up at her as they waited. Her scales started to molt, raining down on the rooftop. Blood oozed from the open wounds before they closed. The muscles began to shrink as her form crumbled. Her teeth fell out as she panted on the ground.
As she changed back, her elegant tail curled back into her body. Her spines shrunk and disappeared altogether. The flesh of her wings tore away, exposing the bones that snapped back into place, sinking into her skin as two of her ribs. The sounds were eerie and slow. They seemed to take hours, even if the transformation only lasted a few minutes.
From a powerful, scaled beast to a delicate humanoid form, the one I knew was her only vulnerability. In this skin, she could be killed, and her bones were fragile. She stood before us, a stark contrast to her intimidating reptilian self.
I had seen this transformation countless times, but none like this. I had trained her after her parents’ deaths. Something was consuming her now. I knew more about Ellids than most, how that creature ate. Her body would metabolize their blood and flesh. It would fuel her gifts.
Arya gritted her teeth to suppress screams of the pain I knew she was in. Her eyes remained wide as we all watched the madness recede. She panted and swayed but managed to stay on her feet.
When the transformation was finally complete, Arya was left shivering and crouched on the floor. Her once luminous scales were scattered around her like discarded pieces of stone, shining dully under the light.
I was extremely surprised she took that form. She hated it. Despised how people reacted to her Ellid form, but how could she not take that form after I threw it in her face that the humans could have killed the younglings. I should never have opened my mouth, but I was angry. They had taken Artemis and had the balls to also attack New Pharia.
I knew my words must have triggered her. I could see the agony in her eyes as she struggled to maintain control. Most people didn’t realize that what she had just done to those humans was eat them.
She hadn’t just absorbed their essence; she had fed on it, making herself stronger. In just seconds, she repaired the barrier around New Pharia. If she hadn’t killed these people, the barrier would have killed her, using up all her blood. So she did what she had to to protect the city.
There had been dozens of humans. I had never seen her absorb that large of a meal before. She was going to be oozing power for weeks. The extra blood would give her a huge boost in raw power.
The physical transformation may have ended, but Arya's torment was far from over. Her eyes were glazed over in pain, her lips moving soundlessly as she tried to suppress her cries.
The look on Merrick's face told me just how much he hated what had just happened. I couldn’t hate what she had just done. I found myself feeling sympathetic towards her. No creature, no matter how monstrous, should endure such agony. I glanced around helplessly at the barrier separating us.
I felt a gnawing ache in my heart as I watched her eyes glaze over in pain. Her incredible strength was drowned by the colossal pain inflicted by the transformation. My fingers itched against the barrier she had put up, yearning to break through, to comfort her. But her purpose for constructing the barrier was more than just safety, it was a physical manifestation of her pride and isolation. It screamed, “Leave me be. I will endure this alone.”
When Arya fell unconscious at the feet of a Rizuga in a pool of her blood and the clear goo that oozed from her body when she transformed, the barrier fell away. Merrick immediately went forward, trying to get to her, but another Rizuga growled and moved before him.
"Move," Merrick ordered, his voice thundering through the silence. But the Rizuga only snarled back, its azure eyes glaring menacingly at Merrick.
The tension hung thick in the air as they faced each other, a standoff between the Gatero and the creature. Both were unwilling to back down. I didn't even try. I knew better. They would be like this for a few hours. I watched as he tried to reason with the giant creature before the Rizuga picked up Arya’s smaller form in between its jaws and jumped off the roof. He was taking Arya to where the pack could watch over her.
I turned to look at Merrick, who was staring into the distance where the Rizuga had vanished. His fists were clenched tightly at his sides, knuckles white. He looked like he wanted to give chase, but we both knew it would be futile; you simply didn't cross a pack of Rizugae.
There was a tense silence as I watched the Rizuga disappear, taking Arya away from us. Merrick swore under his breath, taut with frustration. I, in turn, stepped back from the ledge, my mind spinning with the implications of what we had just witnessed.
We knew that Arya would be safe among her pack. They were bound to her even if they were not like us. They had grown with her and seen her change countless times. They were more than just companions —they were part of a pact that transcended the barriers of species.
Merrick barked orders at the people around him before he picked up his Keala in his arms and walked away from the group with both children. Here in this city, he was her second in command, but he always put that man first. It was the way of things.
I watched as Merrick walked away, his frame disappearing into the distance. Deep down, I knew we were left with our demons to battle. The day would drag on. The people of New Pharia would come out of the shelter, and everyone would start to clean up. They would band together. They always did.
I picked up a discarded scale of Arya's from the ground, holding it in front of me. It shimmered under the light, its beauty stark against the backdrop of the destruction she had wrought. It was an alluring symbol of power and brutality. I understood every time I saw that beast why they were hunted. Nothing in this world should be that powerful. There was a reason Arya was the last of her kind.
That was the beauty and curse of Arya: her power was immense, but so was the burden it brought upon her. Her transformation was a physical change and an emotional upheaval that tore through her like a storm. It left scars that were invisible to the eyes but seared into the soul.
It was a paradox, like Arya herself. It was a perfect embodiment of her dual nature—the predator and the protector. She took lives to keep us safe. She was feared but needed, hated yet loved, an enigma wrapped in scales and raw power.
The scale was cool to the touch, smooth, and iridescent. I ran my thumb across it and then pocketed it.
New Pharia began to stir with life around me as people emerged from their shelters like ants from a disturbed mound. They had all felt the renewal of the barrier, an indication of safety once more.
The back of my hand had been seared from the shield formation, the link between the barrier and Arya’s blood renewed. I looked over at the men she had left behind. The mark on their chests would fade, but her raw power would not. They could leave the barrier. It was the mark, but if they betrayed this city, she would pull their life from them.
“Sir, Merrick said to lock them up, but where? We have nowhere to put them,” one of Arya’s guards asked meekly.
“Just tie them up and put them in one of the empty apartments. Arya saved them. She did so for a reason. Let's not harm them, but set up a guard outside—double shifts. Arya will talk to them once she’s awake. ” I gave the orders and then looked around for Nidra. The black feathered woman stood on the roof's edge, her first set of arms crossed over her chest; her second pair had set her hands on her hips. She wasn’t pleased.
The guard nodded, his expression raw with fear and respect as he regarded the shimmering scales on the ground. A few others nearby shared his sentiment. They all knew what Arya was capable of and the consequences of what she had done.
“Nidra,” I called out to the Lithan. Her bird-like face turned towards me. She had a gift for healing creatures. “My Lepot Dune is down over there.” I pointed to the embankment we had come through. “He is burned and tired. Can you see him?” She nodded her head once. Her bird-like face showed very little emotion. Then, her eyes trailed down the burns that were exposed on the left side of my body. Her eyes narrowed. I heard the click of her mouth as it opened and smashed closed in a huff.
"Patraegar, you need aid as well," she said in her melodic voice, her golden eyes filled with concern. Her feathers stood on end as she walked towards me. “Make your way to the healer.”
"I'm fine, just take care of Dune," I replied dismissively.
Nidra’s beady eyes held my gaze steadily, her concern deepening. “Patraegar,” she sternly said, her tone brooking no argument. “You will fall before you’re halfway there if you are not treated. Your body won’t make it by stubbornness alone.” She approached me on her spindly legs. “What happened to you, Brir?”
“Humans. I will check on Arya. The Rizugae won't hurt me.” It was all I said to her before I stepped up on the roof's ledge and jumped to the ground below. I walked slowly towards the large building I knew housed the Rizugae pack.
I drew closer, and the colossal door opened with a creak, revealing the dimly lit interior. A sentry, one of the Rizuga pack members, stood by the entrance. He was massive and bulky, his scales glistening under the faint glow of fading sunlight.
When I entered the building, the smell of blood and musk permeated the air. The Rizugae lived differently from us; they preferred their living space to be more primal and untamed.
There she lay in the heart of it all: Arya.
Her more human form looked so out of place amongst these giant-scaled beasts, yet they watched over her protectively. She was unconscious and still pale due to the loss of blood, but her breathing was steady, which was both reassuring and unnerving. The transformation had taken its toll on her; she needed to rest.
“Get out, Pasua,” Wraith growled at me, baring sharp teeth.
I didn't flinch. Instead, I held my ground, meeting his glowing gaze sternly. “Call me all the names you want, Rizuga, but you don't have the thumbs to keep her breathing if she stops. We both know what she did tonight was reckless. ”
Wraith snapped his jaws inches from my face. My heart raced, but I didn't back down. I knew the creature would tear me to bits if I dared touch her, but right now, I wasn’t that close. They were just on edge. “Arya will be pissed if you eat me, Wraith,” I reminded the Rizuga, who was still snarling at me. His head pulled back as if I had insulted him. “I promise not to touch her. But I do wish to make sure she is okay.”
Wraith's eyes bore into me, his gaze wavering as he considered my words. The tension in the room was palpable, a toxic mix of threat and unease. One word, and they would all tear into me.
The giant beast seemed to mull it over before taking a step back.
The Rizuga grunted, his nostrils flaring as he begrudgingly stepped aside to allow me a clear view of Arya. In her human form, she was a delicate thing. Her skin was soft and pale purple porcelain. As I approached her, I could see her claw-tipped fingers, the price she had to pay for using that ability. The toll would slowly turn her into that beast, and she would lose this form altogether. An Ellid was born to madness, and madness was what they returned to. It was why they were hunted. If they didn’t have an anckor, their bodies slowly unstabilized.
As I made my way forward, I had to pass very close to the Rizugae. Arya was on her side in the fetal position. Her silvery horn was jutting from her forehead. It looked like this time, she had also gotten back her horn. Each time she took that form, pieces of it stayed.
She hated that form. From my understanding, she was the only world eater with a second turning. Most were more animal than sentient creatures. I stripped off my coat and tossed it onto her naked body. Growls echoed around me.
“Calm down. I didn’t even touch her,” I told them before I leaned back. A large, scaly head covered her form as the alpha of the Rizugae laid down next to her, covering her frail body protectively. I needed her help, so I would wait until she woke up. I knew from past experiences that it would be hours.
Thoughts of Artemis ran through my head. I missed him near me—his weight in my arms. I would get him back, or I would die trying.
???
My eyes snapped open at the sound of a low guttural moan that reverberated through the large warehouse. I sat up, my hands pressed against the rough scaly skin of the Rizuga who had let me nap on him. As I shook off the remnants of sleep, my body protested from exhaustion and the sting of the burns to my arm and side. My chest still ached from the bullet wounds as I struggled to stand upright.
The icy cold air inside the warehouse hit me like a wall, and I hugged myself tightly, briefly longing for the comforting warmth of the Rizuga.
Looking around, I could see the Rizugae had relaxed, their attention no longer solely focused on me. Arya's steady breathing filled the silent air. The alpha was still curled protectively around her. It seemed he had accepted my presence as long as I didn't attempt to touch Arya.
Arya was stirring; the sleek silver horn on her forehead pulsed faintly, glowing with a life of its own. I watched from a distance as she unfolded her body, a thin sheen of sweat on her skin glistening under the harsh warehouse lights. She looked even more fragile in the aftermath of her transformation.
Arya moaned again. I watched her eyes shoot open. She scrambled out of the nest. My coat slid down her body, and she bolted for the doors, hands covering her mouth.
I watched as she pushed past the hefty guard at the entrance, his raw power barely shifting against her desperate shove. Arya ducked under the larger creature and ran between his legs and out the door. The Rizuga growled, their sullen amber eyes glowing as they shot me suspicious looks. I raised my hands in a show of innocence.
"Looks like the transformation was a bit rough on her this time," I commented, my voice echoing in the cavernous space. There was no reply from the pack of silent guardians.
The sound of retching could be heard over the growling Rizugae. I had to push through the giant creatures who had followed her. Arya was down on her hands and knees. Red human blood poured from her mouth as she vomited on the ground. I grabbed her silvery hair and pulled it from her face. She weakly tried to push my hands off her before turning to bare her bloody teeth at me. Another wave wracked her body, and she turned to vomit hard again. More of the sour-smelling red blood poured from her.
The sight of Arya in this state was unbearable, but I couldn't afford to show my emotions. I knew she was in pain, and I had to stay strong for her. I leaned down, wiping the sweat from her brow, and she weakly tried to push my hand away. Her body trembled, and her eyes were filled with fear and pain.
I knelt beside her, my wounded body screaming in protest. The cold ground gnawed at my knees, but I disregarded the discomfort.
"It's alright, Arya," I murmured, trying to soothe her. "You'll be okay now."
Arya only managed a weak nod before she collapsed onto her side, her body heaving with each spasm. The Rizugae looked on, their expressions unreadable as they watched over us.
After what felt like an eternity, her body finally relaxed, and she slumped onto the ground, breathing heavily. Her eyes were closed, and her face was a sickly hue. I wiped the sweat off her forehead and gave her an apologetic smile.
Her fingers weakly clasped mine, and I held on tighter.
"Arya," I said her name softly, brushing strands of silvery hair away from her face. She wrenched her eyes open to look at me, the bright violet irises reflecting intense pain and confusion.
“Brir.” She managed to whisper my name.
“How much do you remember?” I asked. Her hands were now covered in sticky red liquid as the puddle had grown with each heave.
“All of it.” She moaned and retched again. “Urgh, why did I eat them? I know better,” she said as her body started to shake from the violent upheaving.
“Yes, you do. Let's get you up.” I tried to keep my knees out of the spreading puddle of human blood vomit. “I don't want humans on my pants.”
Her swollen violet eyes flashed to me in surprise before a choked laugh fought its way from her raw throat.
“Where is Brir, and what have you done with him?” she asked, standing up. Her back arched backward, her spine cracking as the vertebrae shifted. Her head fell back, eyes to the sky. She leaned on me heavily as I held her up.“It's dark out,” she said, eyeing the sky.
“You have been out for a while.” I kept an arm around her shoulders. She was still shivering.
“I'm glad you made it back in time. You saved Soren and the younglings.” Her head rolled onto my shoulder. She was still very weak. I knew that turning took so much energy out of her. She also smelled foul. The secretions that oozed out of her from the transformation made her smell like rot.
“I came when you sent Theo to get me. Let's get you cleaned up,” I said, sliding my other arm under her knees. I gently swung her up into my arms. Caring for her this way made me think of Artemis, when I’d carried him from the river. I clenched my jaw and tried to take a calming breath. I needed him back. “Then I need to talk to you. I need your help.”
“I can walk,” she said, giving my chest a weak push, but her head flopped down to my shoulder and her arms fell to her chest.
“I bet you can't.” Her body was shaking in my arms.“It would be faster if I carried you when you’re this exhausted,” I said, moving to the tall apartment building I knew she lived in. “Plus, you're naked. Do you want everyone staring at your cock?”
This made her laugh weakly. The slightest smile played on her lips for a moment before it vanished, replaced by the frown from earlier. Despite her protests, Arya didn’t resist as I carried her away from the warehouse and towards the apartment building. The Rizugae followed silently, unseen guardians in the dark. “You know it's not a cock,” she said back. “It has a name.”
“Okay, how is this, then?” I said, rolling my eyes. Arya was being purposely difficult. “Your three-inch flaccid cock-like organ that will get hard if you ever imprint with someone, so you can lay an egg inside them to further your species. Better?”
She groaned but grinned, the ripples of her chuckle eliciting a shiver from me, not exactly from the cold. “You know I don’t imprint,” she told me, rolling her eyes. “Someone would have to trigger my rut. That’s not going to happen. And I’m not laying an egg inside anyone any time soon. You know I don’t believe in furthering my species.” she slurred. “Humans aren't the only ones who have a problem with nudity, then. I thought you were fine with being naked around others.”
“You know what I look like naked, Arya,” I told her. “You've seen my scars.”
She shrugged her shoulders. I looked at the back of the building before pulling the door open and moving through it. Arya pointed. I turned and made it to the elevator before pressing the button for Arya’s apartment.
“Your scars don't make you who you are,” she said. Her hands weakly grabbed my shirt, smearing that disgusting red vomit on it. I would change in her apartment.
I opened Arya’s door and took her straight through the dark apartment to the large bathroom. I set her on the shower seat, tilting the shower away from her before I reached over and turned the water on. I ran it until it was warm, then let it hit her skin. I knew she had to be sore. She always was after she had turned into that thing inside of her.
Her body trembled from the water, lashes fluttering open to expose those ethereal violet eyes.
“Too cold.” A weak groan escaped her chapped lips. She was trying to sit up, reaching for the knobs. “I think you just want to torture me,” she snapped. I smacked her hand away and turned up the heat some.
“No, it's not. You're just being bitchy. I’m not setting the water to melt your skin off.” As expected, she started protesting about how to take care of herself.
“Where is the human you saved? Go torture him.” She started lathering up her body with soap. She moved slowly, obviously in pain. Her words stung, and something must have passed over my face because I saw her go from joking to smiling. I watched it fall. The way the light left her eyes in seconds. “Brir, what happened?” she asked, pulling me into his memories. My jaw tightened as I turned away, unable to look at her.
I picked up a towel from the rack by the tub and hung it within her reach, avoiding her gaze. My actions were guided by respect for her, not modesty.
“We were on our way to answering your call,” I told her honestly. My tone was terse as a knot twisted in my stomach.
“So Theo reached you?” she asked, continuing to soap and rinse her body. All signs that she was exhausted were gone. I almost felt terrible bringing my problems to her door now.
“Theo reached me a few days ago, but a lot has happened. She told me she was heading to Vale next.”
She nodded, reaching for a nearby washcloth and dipping it into the water.
“And the human?” she asked gently, sensing it was a tricky subject.
“I had him with me for a little while. Then they took him.” My voice sounded harsher than I intended. “Artemis.” As the name slipped past my lips, a surge of emotion welled up inside me. I remembered the terror in his eyes, how his breath hitched. The pallor of his skin. The smell of the vomit on the ground. The memory of Artemis, his frail body cradled in my arms.
"They took him?" Arya's voice was sharp now, her eyes flinging open to look at me. "Who took him, Brir?" Despite her sickly state, she sat up straighter, her back leaning against the shower wall as the water sprayed over her body, washing the blood down the drain, her gaze fixed on me.
“The military,” I told her. “They shot him with something. Told me it would kill him if I didn’t let them come and get him.” My throat closed on my words. “So I did,” I choked out. I knew she could see the regret on my face by the way her features softened.
Arya was silent for a long moment, her gaze fixed on the ripples in the water as they swirled down the drain. I watched her hand clench tightly around the washcloth before she breathed, the tension leaving her body as she did. Her violet eyes met mine, and the grim determination I saw in them was all too familiar.
“It sounds like you did the right thing. I doubt he would have made it back here for help,” she said, her voice unwavering. She stood up from the tub, clean and looking a lot better than when I put her in there. She grabbed the towel I had set next to her and wrapped it around her body as she stepped out of the water. “We will get him back,” she said.
It wasn't a promise or an assurance; it was a decree, and I knew better than anyone else that Arya seldom failed to keep her decrees. With that simple statement, she breathed strength into me, giving me hope that we could find Artemis and bring him back to me.
I followed her wet footprints. She tossed her bedroom door open and entered her room.
“Do you want me to wait here?” I asked her.
“It's not like you haven't seen me naked before, Brir,” she told me over her shoulder.
I walked into her room and sat on one of the chairs against the wall. She was looking at me as she started to get dressed.
“Is that how you got burned?” she questioned.
I nodded once. Still leaning my shoulder against the wall. “Dune was burned as well. Nidra is working on him.”
“Come here and let me see the events,” she said, hands stretching to me. I jerked my head back and raised my hands.
“You wish for me to allow you to see inside my head after I just watched you eat a hundred humans?” I asked, raising an eyebrow at her
Arya’s lips pursed, a slow blink acknowledging my retort. She tossed a dark shirt over her head before responding, "A hundred humans? Isn't that a bit of an exaggeration, Brir?"
I crossed my arms, the discomfort of her request oozing through me. "Not by much.”
“It was sixty-four, and it will be much faster than you trying to explain. I will see it all." She narrowed her eyes and crossed her arms over her chest after putting on a shirt. “Do you want to be wasting time right now?”
I tapped my fingers on my bicep, not wanting to give in, but I couldn't disagree with what she said. It would be faster, but I didn't want her in my head when she was so amped up on energy.
"I'm not in the mood for the stroll down memory lane, Arya," I told her, sinking deeper into the chair. "Especially not a violent one."
Her gaze was unyielding as she finished dressing, pulling on a pair of faded jeans. Light hair waves fell down her back as she moved purposefully towards me.
I remained frozen. Artemis's scared face popped into my head. He was terrified of these humans. I had to get him back. I took one step forward, then another, and then my knees were bending, and I was kneeling in front of her.
I watched as Arya used a clawed finger to slit her wrists open one at a time, her purple blood dripping down her fingers before her warm hands were on my temples. I looked up at her as she directed her blood toward my eyes.
I hated the feeling of it running along my skin. Warm and wet, like something crawling on my skin. I clenched my teeth, waiting for the overwhelming feeling I knew was coming. When it reached the corners of my eyes, I had to physically force myself to stop from reaching up and ripping her hands away. I looked up at her face, her blood traveling up her arms to her own eyes, getting ready to connect us and show her the memories in my head.
“Relax,” she told me. “If you fight me, it only makes it worse.”
My vision became cloudy, and purple tinted the world around me. I could feel it traveling warmly behind my eyes and through the path that led to my brain.
A sensation like molten lava began to crackle along the edges of my consciousness, searing the corners where I'd carefully tucked away memories, nightmares, and fears. Each prickling nerve reminded me of why I hated this process so much. Arya's blood seeped into the crevices of my mind, causing me to moan uncomfortably. My vision blacked out, my breath heaving from pain. My memories started replaying backward; I watched my life flash before my eyes, just like the memories had played every other time she saw inside my head.
The first memory of the military men made a scream tear from my throat, the pain of my heart being ripped from me, unable to hold back anymore or push the pain down. Their cold, ruthless eyes were devoid of sympathy as they took Artemis away from me. The bullet hit my chest. The other was busy fastening chains around his wrists. Even as I fought against the wounds, I could feel the dull throb in my chest where their bullet had hit.
A low growl tore from Arya's throat as she watched the military men take Artemis from me. Her hands on my temples tightened momentarily before relaxing again. "Fucking cowards," she muttered under her breath.
Her claws tightened around my temples as she sifted through my memories, her grip so unyielding I had to grit my teeth to prevent myself from crying out again.
The memories spun faster, showing me glimpses of my life these last few weeks as they spun backward for her review.
Our journey together, him laughing as we made camp for the night, the way his eyes lit up while he told me about human customs and traditions. How I held him at night after we fucked.
Finally, we were back at our first meeting; his terrified face when he first laid eyes on me, how those blue eyes had captured me.
Arya pulled back, her gaze focused distantly as she processed what she had seen. I could only breathe in shuddering gasps, my body trembling in the aftershock of the invasion. The taste of vomit was heavy in the back of my throat, memories being ripped open once again.
Her bloodied fingers dropped to her sides, and she slunk back against the wall, her breathing heavy. I watched as her blood slowly traveled back to the open wounds before they stitched themselves up right before my eyes. She looked... exhausted... but her eyes showed a newfound determination.
"You didn't tell me you were shot, you asshole," Arya said, looking at me with cold hard eyes.
I remained on my knees, trying to put myself back together. Feeling like I had been ripped the fuck apart. "I didn't think it was necessary to mention."
Arya scoffed, her gaze holding mine in a silent battle. "Everything related to Artemis is necessary. You should have led with the fact that he was your Savase."
I shrugged, feeling oddly vulnerable after sharing such intimate parts of my life with her. However, I found comfort in trusting her enough to let her into my mind.
The word was something I hadn’t heard since I was still a part of my village. “He’s not.”
“He lights up your threads, Brir,” Arya said in amazement. “Artemis is your soul bond.” She placed a hand on my shoulder before she turned away. I didn’t know what to say.
Arya's words stirred a wave of emotions in me. I felt exposed, raw, and throbbing with pain buried deep within. I watched her retreat. "He lights up your threads, Brir." The sound of her voice echoed in my mind.
"No," I attempted to protest again, but the words fell flat, swallowed by the room's stillness. “No, that can’t be.”
Arya paused by the doorway, her hand resting gently on the frame. She cast a glance over her shoulder, her eyes holding an unfathomable depth. "Your soul resonates with his in a way I have never seen," she said softly. “He is yours.”
The image of him, of Artemis, flared brightly in my mind — his deep blue eyes that held a universe within them, his infectious laughter that used to light up even the dullest of days, his comforting presence wrapped around me.
“Arya, no. That can’t… fuck the fates. Arya. No,” I cried out, losing my grip on my emotions. “I let them take my Savase.”
“Brir,” Arya called my name.
“How could I be so fucking stupid,” I yelled, balling up my fists and pressing them into my eyes till black spots appeared.
Arya yanked my hands away before gripping my shoulders and shaking me.
“Get a hold of yourself. We don’t have time for this. We have to get a plan together and get you healed,” Arya snapped. Her words hit me harder than any physical blow could have.
“You didn’t just let some assholes take your Savase away,” I screamed back at her. “Fuck, I knew I didn’t deserve him.”
Arya's hands released their grip on my shoulders. She stepped back, a look of quiet understanding etched into her weathered face. Her eyes, once full of reprimands, now softened and held me with a pitying and empathetic gaze.
“A soul bond isn't about what you do or don't deserve, Brir,” Arya retorted, her anger slowly replaced by a profound sadness. "It's about connection, love, and pain. You don't get to decide who you deserve or don't deserve, Brir." Her expression softened slightly, but her eyes still held a fiery determination. "The threads of the universe do."
I blinked at her, struggling to digest her words. "Easy for you to say," I muttered, averting my gaze from hers.
“I couldn’t save the people of Kaleso,” Arya told me, her arms crossed over her chest. “Does that mean I don’t deserve a soul bond?”
“What?” I said, confused. “No.”
“Then why wouldn’t you?.” Arya shot back, her words aimed with unerring accuracy.
"I... it's different," I croaked out, my voice barely a whisper as I wrestled with the emotions churning inside me. The guilt, the self-loathing, it all bubbled up inside me like a tempest in full swing.
“Calea wouldn’t have thought so,” Arya said, her voice suddenly tender, starkly contrasting to her previous adamance. "Calea wouldn't want you to imprison yourself in your own guilt."
“I… she…” The words clawed their way up my throat but they came out choked, a lump hardening inside me.
“If she were here today, she would tell you the same thing I am,” Arya continued, her voice now barely more than a whisper. "She would want you to love, to be happy."
"But I can't forget," I murmured, my eyes stinging with unshed tears. "I can't forget what I did... What I failed to do."
"Brir," Arya's voice was soft yet firm, her eyes mirroring the strength she wanted to instill in me. "No one is asking you to forget. None of us have forgotten the rupture. There was no way for you to save her. You know that. Right now, we need to save Artemis. So get the fuck up.”
"Artemis..." The very name sparked a fire within me, one that had been doused by guilt and self-pity. But Arya was right. Grieving over a past that I couldn't change wouldn't help Artemis.
Arya came back and held out a warm washcloth to me. “For your face,” she said. It was then that I realized I was crying. I wiped my eyes with the washcloth, the purple-tinted bloody water staining the fabric.
“Thank you.” I stood back up on shaking legs. I took the cloth and cleaned myself up, turning my back to her. I wasn't very proud, but having her see me so vulnerable was hard.
“We need to get you to Elex,” she said, grabbing her shoes off the floor.
“No.” I shook my head. “I don't have time. We have to get him back.”
“You don't have a choice, brother.” The last word was growled out as she looked at me, daring me to argue. “Elex needs to work on you. You have to be one hundred percent when you go after him.” She laced her boots. What she said made sense. I just didn't want to waste any more time. “We must also get Merrick because I can't go with you.”
“I know, you can’t leave New Pharia unprotected now,” I answered. I knew what she said was true. Her people needed her. “Merrick isn't going to want to help me.”
“He is very much like you. I think that's why you two don't get along. You're both grumpy assholes who hold onto ghosts. Let's talk to him, then see Elex. I promise we will get Artemis back.” She stood up and placed her hand on my shoulder. “Now, let's burn the world to the ground, brother.”