Chapter 21 Kendra
TWENTY-ONE
kendra
I felt terrible about Hawk’s discomfort while Colby interrogated us about our relationship. And when the oven timer went off, the bell literally saved us.
“Are you going to the Winter Ball?” Colby asked.
I nodded, my mouth full of the best chicken cutlet I had ever tasted. “Are you?”
“Of course. I could never miss the opportunity to dress up and spend time with the stuffiest members of Boston society. Do you have a dress yet?”
I pulled up the image of my dress and passed my phone to Colby.
“Love!”
The awkwardness slipped away, and I got to appreciate how close Hawk and his sister were. It’s how it used to be with me and my sisters before things got strained with Kelsey.
“Colby is starting her new role tomorrow with the Minutemen,” Hawk said.
Colby nodded, and I looked at her to explain. When she didn’t, I prodded. “What role?”
“Social media. J thought that it would be a good fit for me, and it would double as a way to keep me out of trouble.”
I noted that Colby never referred to her brother with the nickname we’d all grown to associate with him.
“No, Cole. I offered the position because you seemed bored. And you’re better at social media than anyone in the business.”
I loved watching sibling dynamics; my sisters and I had always fallen into traditional girl sibling roles.
We fought like hell, but each of us would be the first to throw punches if fighting were necessary.
I saw something in Colby that reminded me of myself.
She wanted to succeed and had the opportunity to do so, but she was scared to fail.
I had assumed that it was easy growing up in their family.
But her fear was a stark reminder that failure wasn’t exactly accepted in all families.
My parents would always be there to pick me back up, in a way, her trust fund offered that protection.
But the heart and ego couldn’t always handle the fall.
“Well, I’m sure everyone in the office will respect my qualifications. There won’t be a single accusation of nepotism,” Colby said, sarcasm lacing through her words.
I laughed. “Yeah, and I’m sure after I show up as Hawk’s date to the ball, I won’t have a single accusation that I fucked the boss to get ahead.”
Colby burst out laughing when she noticed Hawk’s shocked expression. “Wait, J, don’t tell me you didn’t think there would be comments?”
“Umm,” he stuttered. “We aren’t fucking.”
“That’s such a man thing,” Colby said, rolling her eyes at me. “It doesn’t matter if you’re fucking; everyone will think you are.”
I caught a glimmer of emotion and couldn’t completely read him.
“Thanks for disregarding the pressure on me, sis.” With that, Hawk turned his back to us and busied himself cleaning up the remnants of our dinner. A common theme was that when Hawk was out of his element, he found a distraction, some busywork to disengage.
Gah. This was a lot. I loved my job, and I really liked Hawk.
I wanted to let things unfold with him, but not at the expense of my career.
No one would challenge his right to his role at the head of the organization.
It was not only a birthright, but he’d been groomed into the position his entire life.
Me? I benefited from a connection to the team, as much as I had tried to keep my connection to Sam quiet, it hadn’t exactly been a well-kept secret.
Oh, and my extensive experience at a lowly ice rink, I couldn’t forget that.
The most complicated thing I had managed before this job was the rink schedule and the irate calls from the teams given shitty ice time.
Colby continued to rant about the differences between the sexes, and Hawk caught my eye. His expression pleaded with me to help him change the subject.
“Oh, I planned to go to the North End for lunch. Want to come with me?” I asked Colby.
“Ooh, a long, boozy lunch?”
Hawk glared at his sister. “If you return from lunch with alcohol on your breath, I’m leaving it up to HR to deal with. The fuck, Colby, are you really that far from reality that you’d drink at lunch?”
“See? He has no faith in me and can’t handle a joke.”
Epic fail, Kendra. I tried to make friends, and instead initiated a battle between the two siblings.
“Anyone want to play cribbage?” I asked.
Both heads snapped in my direction, staring at me in total silence. Until they both broke out in hysterics. I waited patiently for them to stop laughing at my expense.
Hawk gasped for breath. “Sorry, Kenny. Sometimes we bicker like kids. We forget how uncomfortable it makes the people around us.”
“Yeah, we’re fine, see?” Colby gave her brother an over-the-top hug, going the extra mile to prove they forgive and forget. And while they kissed and made up, I could still see that Colby’s words impacted Hawk.
Colby helped Hawk clean after dinner, both of them refusing to accept my help. I sat by feeling useless and refilled my glass of wine. Once they were finished, Colby excused herself and returned to her apartment.
Hawk gestured towards the living room and used a remote to turn on the gas fireplace. With all the windows, I expected his apartment to be cold, but it was very comfortable. Not at all drafty like my apartment. The added ambiance from the fire made it downright cozy.
We sat awkwardly on the couch while Hawk turned on the Bears game, just in time to see their goalie give up a goal.
“Your nephew’s father plays hockey?”
“Yes. For the Blizzards. Tom Campbell.”
“Shit, he’s really fucking good. I wish we could get someone like him on the Bears.”
“I’m sure he’d love that; managing co-parenting on opposite coasts is tough. But the Bears need a goalie first,” I said.
“Huh, I’ve been wondering: what would you do if you were in the position where you had to make a decision that was good for the team, but not necessarily for your family?”
“If it came down to it, could I be part of a trade with Sam knowing that it would cause total upheaval to my sister’s life? Is that what you’re asking?”
“Pretty much. Sam’s contract has a no-trade clause, so unless he asks for it, we own him.”
I thought about it carefully. Kylie’s relationship with Luc was also a major factor.
They may not be public, but that was only a matter of time.
Could I be part of the decision to fire Luc?
Shit happened. Sports teams would shake up the coaching staff if they thought there were issues.
Sometimes they did it when they were fumbling, trying to figure out why a team full of superstars couldn’t win.
“I think I’m lucky. My sisters understand what they signed up for with their athletes. I’m not sure where Kylie and Luc are headed, though. The jury is still out on their relationship.”
Hawk patted his lap, and I kicked off my shoes and propped my feet on him. A throaty moan escaped me as his knuckles pressed into the sole of my foot.
“Are you sore?” he asked.
“I am. It’s a side effect of marathon training.”
“Have you run Boston before?” His hands started to wander up my calves, and I was having trouble concentrating on the conversation.
“N—no.” I inhaled sharply as his fingertips found the ticklish place on the back of my knee. “Not officially, but I ran the course while preparing for the race I did to qualify.”
He slid closer to me. Jesus. This man knew how to destroy every bit of control I had.
“I’m always interested in what makes you tick.” He closed the rest of the distance between us, and I found myself with my back against the arm of the couch, legs spread, and his entire body wedged between them. “But I don’t think either of us wants to talk about the impact of running on your body.”
I shook my head. My eyes darted to his full lips. I couldn’t come up with my usual snappy responses as my brain function was absorbed by the pulsing of my clit as my body strained for friction.
Was this finally happening?
“There is something I need to know before we go any further. Are you usually one and done? Do you leave men before they leave you?”
I nodded.
“That’s what I thought. And while there are some women I would be fine with in an arrangement like that, it won’t work with you.” He swiveled his hips, giving me enough to feel his erection. I placed my hand on his chest, and he held it in place.
“Hawk—”
“Jonathan. Hawk is what people call me when I want to keep my distance. Okay?”
Why did his request to call him by his given name cause my stomach to flip inside out?
“Yeah.”
“You were saying?” He remained utterly still, even though I could feel the thrum of his heart beating against my palm.
I pulled my hand from under his and brushed away the soft curl that flopped onto his forehead. He leaned into my touch but still didn’t make a move. I wove my fingers into his hair, brought my other hand to his waist, and pressed my hips against his, eliciting a hiss.
“What is it you want, Kendra?”
“Kiss me?”
“Are you going to be satisfied with just a kiss tonight?”
I whined in response. “If I have to be.”
And then he closed the distance, his mouth all over mine. He sucked on my lower lip, my mouth opened as his tongue thrust in, meeting mine with an urgency I hadn’t expected. He didn’t hold back.
My clothes weighed heavily as I struggled to move against him.
He rocked into me, giving me just enough to drive me crazy, but not enough for me to get off.
When I moved to untuck his shirt, he grabbed my hand and tore his mouth from mine.
His forehead rested on mine as we both took long, hard breaths.
“Not tonight.” His voice was husky, and I could feel the strain as he tried to hold on to his conviction. My body chilled when he stood up I immediately missed the contact of him against me.
I rolled my eyes and pulled myself up to stand next to him.
“Did you want to stay tonight? Or should I have my driver bring you home?”
“I need to go home. Tomorrow is leg day, and I need to get my gym clothes. But I can Uber. I don’t need you to have your driver bring me.”
He shrugged and grabbed his phone, sending a text. Within seconds he had a response.
“He’ll be out front in five minutes. I’ll walk you down.”
When we reached the entrance of his building, he pulled me into him, kissing me softly. “Goodnight. Sleep well,” he said.