Chapter 7
. . .
Vesper
“How much do I owe?” I tease, going to take the pizza box from Silas when I open my front door.
He lifts the box above my head and deadpans, “The price is one night in my company.”
I jump to grab it and fail miserably. Sometimes, I hate being petite.
“I already endured a whole evening with you this week. I’m only using you for free pizza and delivery.”
When I conclude that I’m not going to be successful in swiping it from his hands, I step to one side, and Silas enters, kicking off his sneakers and heading straight for the kitchen.
He sets the pizza box down in the center of the island, and it’s then I get a chance to take him in properly.
Holy wow.
I shake my head to rid the invasive thoughts I totally shouldn’t be having. Silas looks especially hot today in gray sweatpants, a black T-shirt, and a backward baseball cap. Still, that doesn’t give me a free pass to toss out all sense of integrity, along with my moral compass.
“Did you remember to get extra jalapenos?” I ask.
He eyes me closely. “I did and even asked them to put them all on your side.”
He opens the box, and I immediately snag a piece, so damn hungry after skipping lunch at work.
Open-mouthed, he watches me nail the slice in ten seconds flat. “Is there any end to your talents?”
I shrug and take another piece. “Listen, I may be small, but I can devour food with the best of them.” I motion to the pizza and climb onto a barstool. “I’ve been thinking about this baby right here since the moment I woke up this morning. Every single slice has been living rent-free in my head.”
Silas doesn’t take his eyes from mine as he sits opposite me and picks up his own slice.
“Holy shit,” I gasp, watching him scarf the whole slice down in one bite. “I’m actually disgusted at that.”
He barks out a laugh and picks up one of my slices, hovering it midair. “So, when you nail a slice, it’s impressive, but when I do it, then it’s disgusting?”
I narrow my eyes on him. “It’s disgusting because you’re eating my food.” I point at the slice he’s holding. “Don’t you dare eat my pizza. I’ll never forgive you.”
Slowly, he brings it to his mouth and smirks. “Say, Thank you, Silas, for ordering me this delicious pizza.”
“No.”
He takes a single bite and chews carefully, eyes watering when he swallows a jalapeno.
“Is that nice?” I goad. “Stealing my food when you know I’ve been looking forward to it all day. After a seven-hour shift at the bar this afternoon, all I wanted was to be lazy in bed with junk food and a movie. And here you are, denying me, slice by slice.”
Silas doesn’t say a word as he climbs off the stool, closes the pizza box, and holds out his hand for me to take.
I stare back at his outstretched arm. “Where are you taking me?”
“To bed.”
My cheeks flame, but not before Silas’s turn red too.
“I mean …” Silas closes his eyes like he’s pained. “I mean, you said you wanted to slouch in bed and eat pizza, so that was where I was taking you.” He quirks a brow at me when my jaw pops open. “It’s only pizza, Vesper. I’m not asking you to marry me or anything.”
I slide my hand into his, my voice more of a whisper when I say, “I get that, but I also didn’t think you’d take me seriously when I said I wanted to eat pizza in bed.”
Silas glides the rough pad of his thumb over the top of my hand. “But it would make you happy, no?”
I gaze down the hallway, wanting to follow his lead so badly. “I know it means crumbs in the sheets, but bed eating is one of my favorite things. Shutting out the world, ignoring all my responsibilities, and just … being, you know?”
His eyes soften with understanding. Maybe Silas does the same thing when he’s home alone?
“Did you do that with Kane?”
I want to laugh out loud at the thought of us doing anything that I wanted to do. Everything was always about Kane and to his schedule.
Hell, I’d get home from a long shift, and he’d expect dinner on the table within thirty minutes.
Prick.
“I didn’t really do anything fun with Kane,” I say, feeling another flush of embarrassment but for a completely different reason this time.
I know Silas said he never judged me for allowing his brother to treat me like shit, but I blame myself for letting him do it.
Even if I shouldn’t let it get to me, the guilt weighs heavy on me some days.
When we reach my bedroom, Silas tosses a couple of throw cushions on the floor and pulls back the duvet.
He doesn’t look at all uncomfortable, which puts me at ease.
“Do you want the wall or the nightstand side?” he asks.
Why do I feel like a teenager with my first crush?
“The wall side, please.”
Silas moves aside, and I climb into bed, but when I turn around, he’s disappeared.
“What kind of movie do you want?” I shout through my apartment. “Are we thinking comedy, horror, or a thriller? Your choice.”
Grabbing my TV remote from the nightstand, I hit the Power button right as Silas reappears in the bedroom doorway with plates, napkins, and an empty gin glass.
“I’m thinking a thriller so I can laugh when you jump at the tense moments.”
I point at the gin glass in his hand. “You know, it helps to have liquid in a glass when you drink from it.” Then I take the plates and napkins from him and slide the pizza box toward me.
He looks less than impressed as he reaches a hand into his pants pocket and pulls out a mini bottle of pink gin. One of my favorite drinks of all time.
“I didn’t know I had any of those in the refrigerator.”
He pops the cap and begins pouring it. “You didn’t. I brought it with me.”
I shake my head. “I didn’t notice a bulge in your pants when you arrived.”
All I get is the flash of his eyes and the roll of his full lips as he tries to suppress his amusement.
Silas hands me the drink, and I take a small sip.
“That’s because you were too busy fighting me over pizza.”
The mattress dips with his weight as he climbs into bed next to me and picks up the remote, landing on The Silence of the Lambs.
“Thank you,” I say before he takes the glass from me and sets it on the nightstand next to him.
“For what?”
I gaze at the TV as the opening credits start to roll. “For this, tonight, the pizza, the thoughtful drink, and for just … I don’t know … being kind. For showing me that not all men are total jerks.”
Over an hour and way too many pizza slices later, I’m hiding behind Silas’s back while Clarice Starling walks through a darkened house belonging to Buffalo Bill.
“Is it over yet?” I whisper.
“Nowhere near,” he replies just as quietly. “I hope she doesn’t fall down that well.”
“Oh my God!” I exclaim, wishing I still had my gin to comfort me. That lasted all of about five minutes before it was gone.
“Is it over yet?” I repeat, hands now covering my face despite my hiding behind a broad hockey player frame.
“Come here.”
He loops his arm around my shoulders, and I bury my face into his side.
Christ, he smells good. Too good.
“I bet none of your girlfriends were ever this wimpish.”
A low grumble vibrates in his rib cage, and suddenly, I’m peering up at him, chin pinned between his thumb and forefinger.
“What makes you say that, Ves?”
I bite down on my bottom lip. “I don’t really know. To be honest, you’ve never spoken about your love life, and I’ve only ever met one girl you dated. But judging by tonight, it’s clear that you’re well practiced in treating a girl right, even when she’s too chickenshit to watch a movie.”
Silas picks up the remote and pauses the movie, throwing the room into silence. It’s dark outside, but my blinds are still open, the streetlights and world below adding to the glow from the TV screen.
“I’ve never let anyone get close enough to me. And I can’t remember the last time I went on a date.”
I sit up straight, hair a disheveled mess. “What about Stevie?”
He just shrugs, and for the first time all night, Silas looks a little uneasy.
“Not sure if you’ve noticed this before, but I’m not that great at trusting people. After my dad got handed a long stretch behind bars and Mom passed away, it’s been about survival and not getting hurt again.”
Silas picks up the empty pizza box and sets it on the floor.
“Is that why you’ve held on to any form of a relationship with Kane? Because you didn’t want to lose another family member?”
I watch the way his Adam’s apple bobs.
“If I’d had the choice, I would’ve cut Kane out of my life a long time ago. Only two things held me back.”
Goose bumps break out down my arms in response to the way he’s looking at me. I’m only wearing a white T-shirt and sleep shorts, but I don’t try to hide the effect his words have on me.
“What were the things?” I ask in a small voice.
“It doesn’t matter.”
I pull back and look him dead in the eyes. “It does matter. Tell me.”
He shakes his head. “Why don’t we just watch the movie, and then I’ll grade your mermaid?”
I shake my finger at him and steal the remote before he gets a chance to hit Play. “No. I’m putting my foot down. No more movies and definitely no mermaid grading until I get answers.”
The devilish grin he gives me is enough to melt my panties clean off.
“Such a fucking bossy girl, Knockout. Stubborn too.”
I stick my nose in the air, living up to the reputation I seem to have acquired.
“Before she died”—Silas’s voice is low and gravelly—“my mom made me promise that I’d look out for Kane. That I’d always make sure he was okay and not struggling for money.”
My heart falls an inch in my chest, and Silas pulls a deep breath into his lungs.
“For the most part, keeping that promise has been one of the hardest things I’ve ever had to do”—deep blue eyes pin me in place—“apart from the years I’ve known you.
Being around Kane meant I could spend time with you and make sure you were doing okay.
” He looks annoyed with himself, brows pinned together, pieces of light-brown hair falling into his eyes.
“I’m sorry I didn’t know the extent of how badly he treated you or that he was drinking to excess and taking his miserable fucking existence out on you. ”
Silas pushes a hand through his hair, and I take it in mine, clutching it in my lap.
“What’s worse is that the booze he’s always drinking was indirectly bought by me. Or at least, I contributed toward it.”
“Don’t you dare blame yourself for his behavior,” I scold, which only earns a despondent laugh from Silas.
“How about this then, Ves? I’ll stop blaming myself when you stop giving yourself a hard time for trying to be a good, loyal girlfriend.”
He has a point, and the power of his words makes tears pool in my eyes.
Silas pulls me back into his side, and I hand him the remote, ready to shut out the world once again.
“Okay,” I whisper when the movie restarts, “you got yourself a deal, Mr. Stanton.”