Chapter 27
H ayes looked up at the knock on the door. It opened and Mac poked his head in. Hayes held a finger up to his lips, not wanting him to wake her.
Mac nodded and crooked a finger at him.
Hayes wanted to refuse. He needed to stay here with Devi. He couldn’t leave her.
However, Mac was a good person who’d done his best to look after Devi. So he reluctantly got up and moved over to the door. He stepped out.
“What is it, Mac? I can’t leave her. She’s in a delicate state and it’s not safe for her to be alone.”
“Delicate state?” Mac asked in clear alarm. “Is there something I need to know?”
“Not at the moment. She’s just not herself and I don’t want to leave her.”
“Well, she’s asleep right now.”
“That doesn’t mean that she won’t wake up at any moment.”
“That’s why Silla is going to sit with her.” Mac waved at Silla who was rushing toward them holding a pink teddy bear that was half as tall as she was and a helium balloon that said ‘Happy 21 st .’
That was . . . odd.
But then that was a word he often thought around Devi’s friends. The balloon had a long string and kept whacking into things.
A doctor stepped out of a room and the balloon smacked right onto his face.
“What on earth is going on?” the doctor demanded.
“Oops, sorry!” Silla said, pulling on the string of the balloon. “It’s got a life of its own.”
“Is it someone’s twenty-first birthday?” the doctor asked.
“No.” Silla continued on her way to them.
She stopped in front of them, clearly breathless.
“Sorry, I’m late. When I opened the car door, my balloon tried to escape.
Thankfully, I managed to grab it. I don’t know why that doctor asked me if it was someone’s twenty-first birthday.
Do I look like I’m going to a twenty-first birthday? ” she demanded.
“Um, Silla. What does your balloon say?” Mac asked.
“It says happy twenty-first. Ohh. Now it all makes sense. Drat. I was rude. I should go apologize.”
“I don’t think that’s necessary,” Mac told her.
Don’t ask. Don’t ask.
In the end he couldn’t stop himself, though.
“Why does it say that?”
“Huh?” Silla asked. Then she glanced up at the balloon as though she’d just seen it.
“Oh no! I grabbed the wrong one! What an idiot.” She banged her hand against her forehead and let go of the balloon.
“Shoot!” she cried, jumping up, attempting to grab the string. “Oops. Why did I do that?”
Thankfully the ceiling wasn’t that high and he easily reached up and grabbed the string, pulling the balloon down and handing it back to her.
“Whew. Thank you. Okay, I’m on Devi duty!”
“I can’t leave just Silla with her,” he said.
“Why not?” Silla asked.
“It’s still not safe. The assholes that attacked her haven’t been caught.”
“Well, isn’t that what your boss is for?” Silla asked. “He’s just down there by the elevators.”
He was?
“Also, don’t worry, I’m a black belt in karate. Now, go. Talk to Mac. Maybe get something to eat. A shower would be a good idea too.” She wrinkled her nose. “No offense, but you stink.”
No offense?
How was he not supposed to take offense?
“Um, sorry about Silla,” Mac said. “As you might have gathered, she has no filter.”
No kidding.
“But you do need a break and I need to talk to you. Silla really does have this covered, but we’ll speak to your boss too.”
“All right. If Kent can stay with her, we can chat. I’ll call him, have him come here.” No way was he walking away from her room with just Silla there to protect her.
He wasn’t entirely sure that he believed her claim to be a black belt. She couldn’t even tame a helium balloon, for God’s sake.
After Kent came and promised to stay with Devi as well, Hayes followed Mac to the cafeteria.
“Want a coffee?” Mac asked.
“Uh, yeah. Black.”
“I should have guessed. I take mine with a bit of cream and sugar.”
Right.
They got their drinks and Mac also grabbed a sandwich.
“Listen, I’m not sure what you want to talk about, but I’m hoping you didn’t pull me out of that room to discuss coffee preferences.”
Mac held up his hands before pushing the plate with the sandwich on it over to him. “Eat.”
Hayes sighed. “Not hungry and I don’t need anyone to coddle or micromanage me.”
“Look, I get it. Might be hard to believe, but I was a lot like you when I was younger.”
“Like me?” he asked.
“Yeah. Thought that I had to do it all myself. That I couldn’t lean on anyone else.”
“Listen, Mac, I appreciate this . . . whatever this is. But I really am old enough that I can take care of myself. And Devi.”
“Yeah? And what if I said this was about taking care of Devi? And how I’m worried that if you’re not at peak condition, you won’t be able to do that. If your body is weak from not eating or getting enough sleep, then you aren’t doing your best by her, are you?”
Fuck.
“Nice play, old man,” he grumbled as he took a bite of the sandwich.
Damn it. He was hungrier than he’d thought he was.
“Like I said, you remind me of me. In some ways. I just . . . I didn’t like other people interfering as I used to call it. And my Minnie, she’d tell me off for getting grouchy over it. For thinking I had to be strong all the time.”
“That’s your wife?” he asked.
“Yes, she’s gone now.”
Hayes knew how to be part of a team. He knew how to ask others for help . . . except that was work.
With May he’d never really asked for help. He should have. He should have had someone fucking check in on her.
Was that on him? His stubborn belief that he had to do everything?
It wasn’t your fault, honey.
“Didn’t mean to upset you,” Mac said carefully.
“I was just thinking that . . . that maybe my wife’s death could have been prevented if I’d been more willing to accept help.”
“I don’t know anything about your wife or your history. But from what I know of you, I doubt that’s true. You have your faults, but you’re very protective. Especially of Devi. Can’t think you would have been any less with your wife.”
They were nice words. But he still wasn’t certain. However, he decided to latch onto something else for the moment while he thought about all of that.
“I have my faults?” he repeated.
Mac’s lips twitched. “Yeah, not sure if anyone has told you this but you can be a grumpy bastard.”
Hayes thought about that for a moment, then, to his shock, he let out a bark of laughter.
Shit. When was the last time he’d laughed?
“You’re right. I am.”
“Devi seems to like you, though. A lot.”
He sobered at that. “Does she?” He’d caught her staring at him sometimes. Getting flustered around him. But right now . . . she didn’t seem to be interested in anything. “She’s not herself right now. She’s . . .”
“Scared? Sad? Upset? Those would all be understandable,” Mac said. “Or is she angry?”
“No. That’s the thing. She’s not really anything. She’s flat. She’s not herself at all.”
“It hasn’t even been forty-eight hours since she was attacked.
You have to give her a chance to process.
Devi has had a hard life. She probably made it sound like her life was idyllic before her mom, Vi, died.
But it wasn’t. They never had much money.
Derick always had trouble keeping down a job.
Devi doesn’t remember much of that because when her mom got ill things really turned bad for her.
But for years, she’s lived on the edge of survival.
I honestly don’t know how she’s kept going.
When she moved in with Rohan, things were better in some ways.
But, let’s face it, living with a gang member isn’t safe for a young woman.
Rohan guarded her fiercely, but he couldn’t always be home. ”
“What? Are you saying that someone hurt her?” Hayes asked.
“No. I’m saying that she’d sit at home with several locks on the door and the keycode for Rohan’s gun safe.
Even though she swore she’d never be able to use it because she hates violence.
I think anyone is capable of violence when they’re pushed far enough.
But imagine if that time of your life was some of the happiest and safest memories that you have.
Then think how much energy and stamina it’s taken for her to keep going and do it with a smile on her face. ”
“She’s strong,” Hayes said, thinking that through. She’d been running on fucking empty for years. Probably always alert, always waiting for something bad to happen.
“Strongest person I know. Even if she doesn’t know it. It’s not that Devi doesn’t care about her own safety, but she doesn’t put herself first. You haven’t left her side since she ended up in here . . . why is that? Is it just a sense of . . . chivalrous protection?”
Chivalrous protection?
No. That wasn’t what he felt.
“Would you do this for anyone in Devi’s situation?” Mac asked. “Sit by their side and watch over them?”
“Of course not.” He didn’t let people close.
Not since May died. Hell, not even before that really.
No more than he had to. He’d never been a people person.
Sure, he had his buddies in the Navy Seals and when May was alive, they’d had friends in the BDSM community.
But he’d pushed most of them away after her death.
“Then why Devi?”
“Because I care about her.”
“As a friend?”
“Exactly,” he said. “We’re friends. I want to help her. I don’t want her to have to worry about paying the hospital bill or her rehabilitation. I’m going to cover all of that.”
Something in Mac’s face changed and Hayes could swear he saw a flash of disappointment.
“You’re a good friend,” Mac said. “But it’s not going to feel like a fair exchange. Taking that much from someone she just met? Not going to happen.”
“She needs to let me help her.”
Mac smiled sadly. “Listen, you don’t need to worry about Devi. She has friends here and we’ll take care of her.”
“You can’t take care of her. It’s too dangerous. She’s going to have to come home with me.”
As soon as he said the words they felt right.
She’d come home with him.