Chapter 57
Kallister’s question hangs in the air like a ticking bomb.
Tick tick tick.
Why would he say that?
Why would he. Fucking. Say that.
As my chest clenches, I lock my gaze with Kallister’s, feeling sick to my stomach. He’s kept my secret for months, and now he’s using it against me to get his way?
Kallister offers a weary shrug. “As much as it pains me, I think it’s about time he knows, don’t you?”
Screw you, I almost spit out. This isn’t “paining” him. He’s been waiting for this moment, I realize. Holding on to this secret so he can use it when it’s most advantageous to him.
“Wren…” Gray is staring at me. I can see his mind working. “What’s he talking about?”
“I…” My voice sounds weak in the cavern. I rub my cheek, wanting to bury my face in my hands.
The longer I stay quiet, the more frustrated Gray becomes. Finally, he turns to Kallister, who’s more than happy to share all the details.
“Wren’s parents were the Tin Block Traitors.”
I see the confusion in Gray’s expression first, and then the slow, agonizing shift—the anger creeping in, the rush of betrayal.
“How is that possible?” he demands.
“I’m sure Wren can give you the backstory, but she wasn’t born Wren, was she?” Kallister gives me an expectant look, and I want to cry. “Isn’t that right, Stella?”
Gray’s jaw tightens. “Your name is Stella?”
“Stella Hess.” Shame swirls in my stomach like poison. “But I didn’t know until recently.”
His resulting silence feels suffocating. I want him to say something. But he dismisses me from his gaze, focusing on Kallister instead.
“The Tin Block Traitors,” Gray repeats.
“Jakob Hess and Marina Serrano,” Kallister confirms. “My brother, Julian, my stupid, pathetic brother—”
I flinch at the disgust dripping from his voice.
“He let himself get led around by his cock.” Kallister shakes his head in disapproval.
“I told him Marina was against us, but Julian didn’t believe me.
He was so godfucking arrogant, he thought he knew better than everyone.
He chose her. Over his own blood. He risked everything, not just his life, and my life, but the lives of every single Mod on the Continent. ”
“You voted to rescue him,” I say weakly.
Kallister lets out a hard laugh, and I can practically feel the hatred pulsing through him. “No one was going to authorize that rescue. I knew it wouldn’t get done.”
“Then why vote yes?”
“On the off chance that he survived. You never know when you might need an Ash on your side.” He turns back to Gray.
“Marina Serrano planned the bombing of Valterra Ridge. Her and Jake. Julian played a hand, too, because he ignored my warnings. Because he thought he was so much smarter. Because he loved her.”
My heart twists again.
“Thousands of people,” he emphasizes to Gray. “Your parents. Your sisters. Gone. Dead. Burned to a crisp. Their bones underwater.”
“I am not my parents,” I grind out.
I glimpse the storm brewing in Gray’s eyes. I knew this moment would eventually come, but I was hoping it wouldn’t.
I implore him with my gaze. “I’m sorry I didn’t tell you. I didn’t want you to look at me differently. I’m not responsible for my parents’ sins. But they stole your life from you, and I didn’t want you to know that I come from people who would do that.”
The words spill out in a rush, a desperate attempt to explain something that could never truly make sense. Because it still doesn’t. I don’t know why my mother betrayed her own people. My father, fine, perhaps you could make me understand. He wasn’t a Mod. He didn’t know what that meant.
But she knew.
And she still did it.
I reach for Gray’s arm, but he takes a backward step, which is like a slap to the face.
Meanwhile Kallister’s regarding me with those fake caring eyes. “I’m not doing this to be cruel, Wren,” he starts.
Bullshit. Until this moment, I didn’t realize how much he enjoys hurting people. Because I can sense his dishonesty. He’s enjoying this.
“But Gray needs all the information in order to make an informed decision about this vote.”
“This has nothing to do with whether Adrienne stays in the Authority,” I accuse.
“You did this because he was about to do the right thing, and now you’re planting doubts in his mind about my motives.
” My voice shakes as I turn to Gray. “There is no ulterior motive here. I truly don’t believe Adrienne should be blamed for what happened at the bunker. ”
He stares at me, his throat working as he swallows. “When I took you to the Ridge, when I told you everything about my family…my past…” My uncle. “You knew then that your mother was the reason my family was gone?”
My heart drops, cold and heavy, like a rock sinking straight to the bottom of the ocean. “Yes.”
“And you didn’t say a fucking word.”
“I’m sorry.”
He lets out a sharp, humorless laugh. “Would you leave us alone now?”
“W-what?” I stutter.
“I said leave us.”
The last time I saw Gray enraged, it was after I incited him without permission. He could barely look at me, but even then, I knew the anger stemmed from fear and worry that I’d almost lost my life. Right now? He’s not looking at me because he wants nothing to do with me.
“Leave,” he repeats. There’s ice in his voice, and every cell in his body transmits the same message: Get the fuck away from me. “I need to speak to Kallister about the vote.”
As a sob catches in my throat, I turn on my heel and run out of the Temple.
That afternoon, I track Saint down in the common room. It’s been hours since I left the Temple, and I have no idea where Gray is. I’m starting to worry.
“Have you seen Gray?” I ask without preamble.
“Yeah. He beat the hell out of me in the gym about an hour ago.” Saint holds up his hands to show me his knuckles. They’re cracked and red.
I bite my lip. Hesitating. “Did he tell you?”
I suddenly feel Saint poking the back of my mind. It’s the first time he’s tried to link telepathically with me.
“About how your parents are loathed by every single person in the Modified world?” he says, and I see the veins of his bare arms rippling. “You mean that?”
“Yes, that.” I meet his eyes. “Do you think I’m evil, too, now?”
“That’s a stupid question, Darlington. If we were responsible for the shit our parents did, half of us wouldn’t be here, myself included.”
I lift a brow, but he doesn’t elaborate.
“How are you going to vote?” I ask out loud. “Will you vote to disband and put Kallister in charge?”
He tips his head, thinking. “I don’t know. Probably not.”
My stomach flutters with relief. “Can you convince Gray to vote that way, too?”
“I don’t think you can convince Gray to do anything he doesn’t want to do.”
Before I can say anything else, Saint gets an alert on his comm and checks the screen.
“Time to vote,” he says brusquely.
Shit. It’s already happening?
As I tail him out the door, he looks over his shoulder, hunter-green eyes flickering with amusement. “You’re not a mission lead.”
“No, but I want to talk to Gray before you go in.”
“I don’t know how receptive he’ll be.”
“I have to try,” I say, jutting out my chin.
On the Operations floor, I’m startled when a familiar figure rounds the corner at the end of the hallway. Mako. Relief shoots through me. He’s wearing his mission clothes, which are still streaked with dirt and soot, but he appears unharmed as he strides down the hall.
“Hey,” I say, running toward him. “When did you get back?”
He wraps his big arms around me in a warm hug. “Just now. Henley picked me up.”
“I’m so glad you’re safe. How was your night at the Hollow?”
Mako breaks out in a grin. “So I know I’m supposed to be all somber and sad because all this bad shit happened last night, but…Holy hellfuck, Wrenny. The women there…” He whistles under his breath, and I can’t help but laugh.
“How’s Xavier? Did you see him?”
“Oh, I saw him. He and Reed had this beautiful girl sandwiched between them and—”
“I don’t need to hear anything more,” Saint interrupts, rolling his eyes. He takes off walking again.
I touch Mako’s arm, already backing away. “I have to go, too, but I’ll catch up with you later.”
I hurry after Saint, reaching the war room in time to see several people streaming in, operatives I’ve either never worked with or just seen at the shooting range. The only person I recognize is pink-haired Raven Persimmons, who nods at Saint before disappearing into the room.
I don’t see Gray yet. “I’ll wait out here for him,” I tell Saint.
The corridor empties out, leaving me anxious and alone. My nerves are running high by the time I hear his footsteps. I spin and find him walking toward me with that long, confident stride, his blond hair gleaming beneath the overhead lights.
His expression softens when he sees me. Only for a second, before shuttering again.
“You shouldn’t be here,” he says gruffly.
“I know you’re mad at me for keeping that secret from you,” I blurt out. “But please don’t let that cloud your judgment in there.”
His eyes flash with chagrin. “The fact that you find me incapable of making decisions—”
“No, that’s not what I’m saying. I’m just saying…Adrienne messed up. That doesn’t mean Kallister gets to do whatever he wants now.”
“We’ll talk about it later.” He storms past me into the war room, and the doors buzz closed.
Battling my frustration, I return to my quarters, wishing I were a damn mission lead. I find Poppy curled up on my bed, as she’s been most of the day.
“Hi,” I say, sitting on the edge and stroking her arm. “You feeling any better?”
“No,” she mumbles.
“Listen, I talked to Tana earlier. How do you feel about spending some time in the valley with Luisa’s parents?”
Poppy doesn’t even look at me. “Sure,” she says numbly.
“I think it will be good for you to get off this mountain. And I heard they’re planning a service for your mom down there in a couple of days.”
“Okay.”
I don’t know how to get through to her. Not sure I can. She’s lost the only parent she’s ever known, and though Fiona was overprotective, she loved her daughter fiercely. The woman did everything she could to protect her.
Together we go to her quarters, where I help her pack her things. Luisa shows up not long after. She holds out her arms and envelops the girl in a hug.
“I’m so sorry about your mom. We all loved Fiona.”
“Thanks,” Poppy whispers.
“My parents are excited to have you there. Mom doesn’t get to cook for guests as often as she’d like. You ready to go?”
I reach into Poppy’s mind before they leave. “Check in with me later, keen?”
“Keen,” she says.
I’m on pins and needles waiting for the war room meeting to wrap up. By the time I hear the knock on my door, I’m a bundle of nerves.
My heart leaps to my throat as I let Gray in. All it takes is one look at his face, and I know what happened.
“Why?” I say flatly. “Why would this vote pass?”
“Because she caused a massive civilian death count.” He sinks onto the small couch and rests his head in his hands, rubbing his temples.
“None of the mission leads can trust her after that. Most of them admitted they voted to disband.” Gray lifts his head to meet my eyes.
“My vote wouldn’t have counted for anything. It was nearly unanimous.”
“Nearly,” I echo.
“Two people voted against Order Five.”
“Do you know who?”
“No. Votes are secret.”
With hesitant steps, I go to sit beside him. “Are you ready to talk about it?” I ask quietly.
His gaze finds mine again. “No.”
And then he gets up and walks to the door.
My heart splinters, but I manage to rise, somehow maintaining my dignity. “I’ll be here whenever you’re ready to talk. For what it’s worth, I’m sorry. I should have told you. I just didn’t want to lose you.” I wince when I hear my voice crack. “I really didn’t want to lose you.”
For a second, his shoulders sag, his features softening.
But that doesn’t stop him from leaving.
Before I can succumb to the tears, I grab my comm and slide it in my pocket, then hurry down to the Operations floor.
I can’t be inside this base right now. I can’t think in here, and my emotions are running too high. I’m gutted that Gray walked out on me. And I’m disappointed in Kallister for disbanding the Authority and proving himself to be as power-hungry as everyone else on this asinine Continent.
Cross was right. It’s fucking unsalvageable.
I take a breath, trying to calm myself, but the air feels too thick. I need fresh air.
Turning the corner at the elevator bank, I glimpse a blur of movement. A dark-blond head. A khaki-pant leg.
For a second I think it’s Gray, but I reach the end of the corridor in time to see Kallister disappear through the air lock.
Suspicion pricks at me. Why is he leaving the base after dark?
I walk faster, entering the air lock myself.
The door hisses open to reveal an empty landing hangar, so I head toward the path that winds through the dense trees.
I spot Kallister about twenty yards ahead, a dark silhouette against the sky.
The sun set about an hour ago, so it’s hard to see the path, but his strides are fast and deliberate. A man with a purpose.
I’m on full alert now. I allow him to place some more distance between us before I follow, silently navigating the craggy cliffside. I know where he’s going. This is the same path that leads to the white daggerstone cave.
The cave where he likes to have private conversations because nobody’s abilities work there.
When I reach the top of the bluff a few minutes later, I catch the faint murmur of voices echoing out of the cave’s entrance.
I flatten myself against the stone wall and begin edging toward the mouth of the cave, shrouding myself in the shadows.
“With Adrienne gone, it’ll be easier to sanction your missions. No more votes, no more running everything by those spineless assholes.” Kallister’s voice.
His words bring a flicker of confusion.
Missions? What missions is he talking about?
I press my back to the wall, holding my breath as I wait for a response.
“Gray won’t like it. He doesn’t have the stomach for what we’re doing.”
Hawkins.
That was Hawkins.