Chapter 1 #2
We’d been looking for some unseen connection to Sergey and the men in that house for months, but it didn’t seem like we were making any real progress.
On most problems, we all had trust issues and didn’t share information.
But ever since whoever set the wheels in motion that got Rylee, Hannah, and that poor young girl kidnapped, we’d shared information freely.
Keeping Hannah’s secret about Sergey was the only thing I’d held back, and it was out of safety, not ego, that I did.
“And what about you?” Lucian asked, and I gave him a confused look.
He reached into the inside pocket of his suit jacket and pulled out a flask.
Opening the top, he took a healthy swallow before reaching over and handing it to me.
I stared him in the eyes before tipping the silver vessel up and taking a swallow.
It burned like fire going down, and I blew out a breath before handing it back to him.
Years ago, whenever we needed to have a serious conversation, we’d take a shot before we began.
It was like a cleansing of the bullshit before we spoke truth to the other person.
It had been years since I thought about it, but being back here was somehow comforting.
Lucian was the only person I spoke with about my feelings when I’d discovered James, and again, a year or so later, when he found Regan.
“I’m worried about what you’re doing to yourself,” Lucian started, and I wanted to stop him, but he held up a hand, silently requesting me to hold my thought. I nodded, so he lowered his hand and continued. “How long have you been doing this, and what kind of toll has it taken on you?”
“I’m not following,” I admitted, and he sighed.
“You’ve been monitoring Hannah for months now, and for countless years, you’ve helped so many people. But what’s been the cost for you? When was the last time you dated someone or even had dinner with anyone besides Regan?”
“I’ve dated, and I’m perfectly happy with my dining arrangements.”
He shook his head and sat forward. “I’m worried about you, Rhys. I can’t imagine the mental anguish you carry around.”
He was right, but I couldn’t admit it to him.
Hell, I could barely admit it to myself.
There were women I could call if I needed to get laid, but I hadn’t attempted to date anyone in more than ten years.
My life was always so unpredictable, I didn’t want to diminish a relationship by not giving everything I had to it.
In truth, I didn’t know if I would ever have someone in my life. And I always thought I was okay with that, but seeing everyone around me happy and coupled up sometimes weighed on me when I crawled into bed alone, night after night.
And my . . . tastes in the bedroom weren’t exactly conducive to a healthy relationship with the work I did.
My eyes drifted to the monitor, and I saw Hannah pull a blanket over her legs before turning the page on her book.
I pushed away the inappropriate thoughts that kept trying to creep in and turned to Lucian.
“I know you’re just trying to help, but not everyone gets the same things in life.
I’ve come to accept it, and I promise, I’m fine. ”
“You’re just as stubborn as I remember,” he said as he stood from his seat and walked to the side of the desk. I wasn’t going to hide the monitor like I was doing something wrong, and when he saw what Hannah was doing, I saw a smile push up on his cheeks.
“You’re worried about her, but she’s not alone. She’s got you watching out for her.” He turned to walk out of the room but glanced over his shoulder before he reached the door. “Since you’ve been in contact with her, maybe it’s best if you reach out to her. Get the ball rolling, so to speak.”
“What are you playing at, Lucian?” I asked as he opened the door.
“I’m not playing at anything, Rhys. You’re the person who helps when someone is struggling, and from what Stella, Rylee, and Grace have said, your compassion and understanding is what gave them the most comfort.
I just want to make sure Hannah’s protected and taken care of while we figure all this out.
” He paused before adding, “She is my sister, after all.”
He walked out the door, closing it behind him, and I sat stunned at his admission.
Seeing the softer side of Lucian was disconcerting, but Rylee deserved all the credit.
She softened the hard edges of the lunatic, making him closer to the person I knew all those years ago instead of the angry asshole I’d witnessed over the last few years.
As I looked at the monitor again, I saw Hannah had fallen asleep on the couch with her book resting beside her and a lightweight blanket covering her up to the neck.
I ran my finger down the screen, wishing I could feel the softness of her skin, before pulling my hand back, disgusted with myself.
After everything she’d already been through, the last thing she needed was someone leering at her, or worse.
Guilt began to build when I thought about the bomb I was about to drop onto her life.
Hannah Johnson was officially a Lenkov, and the target on her back just got bigger.