Chapter 2
EVAN
Ihated Chicago.
I used to love it. It was my favorite place on earth, unless you counted my Ro’s arms, but now it was a place that took everything from me.
I’d burn it to the ground if I could.
“Nothing?” I asked as Klaus came out of a shop where we’d heard some jewelry had been pawned off.
“No. Not her stuff,” he said.
I let out a breath of relief. I couldn’t bear to go in and look. If I saw her wedding ring in a fucking pawn shop, I knew I’d set fire to everything.
We got back into Klaus’s car and pulled back onto the street. The cops in this city were worthless. They’d not been able to do shit. I assumed Enzo owned them, and I was ready to pay his ass a visit.
With nothing left to go on, we went back to Klaus’s place. I trudged to the room I shared with Anson and grabbed a quick shower. He was out with E.
E pissed me off.
He’d tried to question me in Church’s garden. I knew he was testing me to see what kind of guy I was, but he’d gone too far by commenting on how Rosalie fucked. I didn’t like that. It was disrespectful as fuck.
So while I missed his ass, I also wanted to pummel him too. I was proud of how far he’d come, but damn… he was asking for it.
And he kept doing it. Kept trying to catch me off-guard. Trying to make me come out and be whatever the fuck person he thought I was. Like I was hiding myself.
I mean, technically, I was, but not in a manner that I wasn’t good enough for Ro.
That shit was just grating on my nerves.
When I talked to Klaus about it earlier in the day, he told me it might be coming from a place of jealousy with E, and to let it slide.
We needed help finding Rosalie, and E was a horseman and held quite a lot of power.
I knew this, but it didn’t piss me off any less.
I let my head rest against the tiles. Finally having some alone time, I let out the tears I’d been struggling with. They flowed freely and mingled with my water.
The only bright side to all of this was that no body parts had been found. No bodies. Nothing. So it gave me hope that wherever she was, she was alive.
Of course, I prayed she wasn’t being harmed. If I let those images flood my brain, I became unwell. I knew better than most what it was like to be hidden and tortured.
Fuck, I didn’t want that for her.
I’d take her place in a heartbeat if it meant she was safe.
I let the tears come for a few more minutes before I turned off the water and got out.
I dried off quickly, put on gray sweatpants and sunglasses, and pulled my gaiter around my neck.
I assumed E would come back with Anson, and I liked being covered when he was around.
I left off my shirt and went out to the living room.
“Want food?” Klaus asked as he looked up from his phone.
“Whatever you get,” I said, going to lie on the floor to do some crunches.
He seemed fine with my giving him the green light on food and called in a takeout from a local burger place. I noted he ordered extra, so I assumed E would be coming back with Anson.
Klaus came and sat on the couch, watching me.
He and I often worked out together. He was ripped, but I liked to tell him I was bigger.
He’d chuckle at that and remind me he had height on me, since I was just a smidge below six feet five.
Ro always looked so small between me, Anson, and Klaus.
Anson was my height, and Klaus had about two inches on us.
It was all good, though. She needed big guys in her life. I liked how tiny she was and how perfectly she fit in my arms.
“What number are you on?” Klaus asked.
“Seventy-two. Three. Four. Five.” I counted as I continued to work out. I needed to take my mind off the nightmare of not being able to find my Ro.
He got up and left me, only to return a moment later with a weight. He placed it on my stomach.
“Go,” he said.
I grunted at the extra pounds, but continued to work.
“Good. Good form,” he encouraged me.
I was breaking a sweat. I loved it.
“We can spar when you’re done. Right here in the middle of the living room. I can grab some mats.”
I nodded, letting him know I was game. I knew he had a gym, but I hadn’t planned on a full workout. He left and came back. I stopped my crunches and got up, helping him move his coffee table out of harm’s way and slide his couch back a bit.
Klaus’s place was massive, so we definitely had plenty of room. I liked sparring with Klaus. He was unpredictable and gave me a run for my money.
He tossed me some headgear, and I put it on. He put his on, and we circled one another. He’d changed into track pants before he came back out and wasn’t wearing a shirt now either.
He swung on me, and I chuckled.
“You can do better,” I said.
“Probably could if you stopped moving around, you fucking little worm.”
I laughed at that and ducked and shifted away from him quickly when he attacked again.
He laughed, enjoying this bit of relaxation as much as I was. We fucking needed it.
The front door opened, and Anson came in with E. We didn’t stop what we were doing, and I noted that Ryder had wandered down and was watching from the couch.
Ryder was built and worked out with us when Rosalie wasn’t on tour.
I got along great with him. He was fun and always seemed happy.
Lately, he’d been so damn morose. I knew he felt guilty over Rosalie being taken.
It wasn’t his fault. I made a point of talking to him about it tonight.
I didn’t want him kicking his own ass about this shit.
The only fault was with whoever took her, and once we found the asshole, he’d be punished.
“Hands up, hands up,” I grunted at Klaus as he lowered them to attack with his legs.
He cursed softly as I caught him in the jaw.
We kept at one another for a long time before I got the upper hand on him and took him down with a leg sweep.
“Fuck,” he groaned, hitting the mats hard.
“Dead,” I said softly, chuckling at him.
I helped him to his feet before I grabbed my bat and tossed it to him.
“We playing baseball?” he asked, smirking at me.
“Full force. No pulls,” I said.
This was a game we often played. He hadn’t been able to hit me in ages. I wanted to keep up on it.
“You sure?” He raised his brows, and I nodded.
And that was it.
He tore forward, bat swinging. I dipped and dodged him, repelling his attacks and disarming him over and over. I took him down on repeat, only for him to get back up.
Klaus wasn’t trained in martial arts. He was simply just really good at kicking ass.
I knocked him down once more, and he lay on his back.
“Done?” I asked.
“Done,” he muttered. “Got my cardio in.”
I chuckled at that and offered him my hand. He took it, and I pulled him to his feet.
“You’re getting better,” he said, clapping me on the back.
“Or you’re getting old,” I mused.
He chuckled at that. “Never.”
“What’s that fighting style called?” E asked, eyeing me.
“Silat,” Anson answered for me.
E nodded. “That’s pretty cool. Is it a lot of defensive stuff?”
“Yeah,” I muttered, looking over at Ryder, who had his eyes half-open. “You good, man?”
“Just tired,” he mumbled.
I glanced at Anson. He’d noticed the change in Ryder, too.
I nodded for Ryder to come with me, and he did wordlessly. We went upstairs to the room I was sharing with Anson, and I closed the door.
“I’m sorry,” Ryder said immediately as he sat on the edge of the bed. “For Rosalie. I fucked up, and I can’t get it out of my head.”
I sat next to him.
“It’s not your fault. This guy obviously planned the shit out of this.”
Ryder shook his head and looked up at the ceiling. I could see his eyes shining with tears.
“It’s more than that. You have been through so much shit.
I know how much you love her. And Anson.
He’s the same. Since the moment he saw her, he spoke about her.
I had to listen to it. Then I got to meet her and I…
” He swallowed and looked down. “I fucked everything up. If something happens to her, I’ll never be able to live with myself.
I was supposed to protect her, and I failed her.
I failed you. Anson. Klaus. Ellis. I-I’m struggling. ”
I said nothing, absorbing his words. We sat in silence for a few minutes before I said what I was thinking.
“How long, man?”
His words were soft. “How long what?”
“Have you been in love with Rosalie?”
He wiped at his eyes and looked down at his hands.
“Since I took her out after you were gone. We rode my motorcycle. I kissed her. It wasn’t supposed to mean anything, but I fucked that up too.
I vowed never to fuck around with someone my best friend wanted, and I didn’t.
I haven’t. I wouldn’t. We came back here for this tour, and seeing her in the car with Ethan…
something just snapped inside me. I’d spent the evening driving around my old stomping grounds.
Saw the restaurant I took her to. Twisty Cone.
Drove the same path we took that night. I didn’t even realize I was doing it.
” He wiped at his eyes again. “Then I picked her up, and she was crying. That was it. I realized what I’d been doing for five fucking years.
I-I hugged her in the hotel room. She knew I was upset over something and asked me what it was.
I couldn’t bring myself to say it. I just told her I was in my feelings from being home.
She cared. She gave a damn. I picked her up and carried her to bed, and it…
it felt right. I’m sorry. I overstepped—”
“Man, shut up,” I said, sighing.
He stared at me. “Evan—”
“I said shut up.” I got to my feet and paced the room.
He was quiet, watching me.
I let my head fall back. I suppose I’d known he was for a long time.
He was great at hiding his feelings, though.
Lately, he sucked at it, but I’d seen him with Ro over the years.
He was so gentle with her. Always listening.
Always talking to her. He’d sit with her when Anson had meetings and was scouting while they were away.
Sure, he was security, but I remember when she was video calling me, and he was there, protecting her.
And the time he came into the room and sat with us while she was working on a new song.
He was listening to her play her guitar, smiling the entire time.
It was the little gifts he’d get her. I ignored it, figuring he really cared for her as his friend.
I figured if he wanted her, he’d tell us.
Since he never did, I continued to believe it was nothing.
“I wrote my resignation letter. I’m giving it to Klaus today,” he said softly.
I stopped and looked at him. “Why?”
“Look, man, I failed. I’m not good enough to protect her. It was the easiest fucking job in the world, and I let my feelings fuck things up. I can’t do that shit. I’m stepping away. I’m not a good guy to have in the position.”
“You’re the best guy for it—”
He shook his head. “I’m done. Seriously.
There’s no way I’d ever be able to look at her after failing her.
And if she dies because I fucked up?” His jaw quivered, and he shook his head.
“I can’t. I-I need to go. I’ll keep trying to find her, but I gotta get some space, man.
” He got to his feet and left the room, his head hanging.
I closed my eyes and sat on the edge of the bed.
I needed to talk to Anson.