Chapter 15
NYAH
After accepting the gift basket, Beth had led us out to the patio, where Caleb peeled off to help Greg with the barbecue. Beth introduced me to a group of friends, and I ended up enjoying a few captivating conversations.
I spotted Caleb heading inside and excused myself to go meet Greg beside the barbecue.
We hit it off instantly and talked about the hotel, the weather, sports, and Caleb.
It was easy with Greg. He didn’t study me the way others did, didn’t ask questions that felt like polite interrogations. He just talked to me like I belonged.
“Caleb tells me you guys aren’t together,” Greg said, sipping his beer. “What’s up with that?”
I almost choked on my water. “Oh God, no!” I said, struggling to regain my composure. Jeez. Is that what everyone thinks? “We just work together at the hotel. He was giving me a lift, then he had to come here, and my place was in the other direction...”
Greg pursed his lips. “Hmm.”
I looked at him quizzically. “What?”
“Well, like I told him, he’s never brought any girl to an event like this, unless you count family friends... and I’ve known him my whole life.”
I licked my lips. “Well, actually, I wasn’t going to come, but he promised me the most amazing pork chops and beef ribs. Which smells incredible, by the way.”
Greg laughed. “Right, so you’re stringing him along for the free barbecue, then you’re going to dump his ass.”
“Exactly.”
We snickered.
I excused myself to use the restroom. While washing my hands, I stared into the mirror.
The fluorescent lighting was unforgiving. It stripped things down to what couldn’t be softened.
I realized I was the only person at the party who was of a different ethnicity—besides the help, everyone was Caucasian.
I was sure I did not match their typical profile, yet somehow, I still fit in.
Or at least, I passed well enough not to disrupt the aesthetic.
I’d caught a few discreet frowns directed my way, but they treated me with respect more out of fear of minorities.
It was the kind of politeness that carried distance in its bones, the kind that kept hands clean while minds stayed comfortably closed.
I had been treated differently my whole life because of my skin tone.
People couldn’t tell what race I was, and as an orphan, I didn’t know myself but presumed I was either Indian or Hispanic.
Not knowing where you come from leaves a hollow space that people feel entitled to fill with their own assumptions.
Desperate to find out more, I’d tried inquiring at several agencies over the years.
I’d researched online for any hint that would tell me where I came from, but it had all been futile.
Maybe my parents didn’t want me. Maybe they weren’t looking for me.
Those thoughts crept in when I was tired, when I was alone, when mirrors asked questions I couldn’t answer.
Not wanting to become too emotional, I headed back outside to enjoy being in the moment.
As I neared the kitchen, I heard three women talking.
“Oh, my God! Like, really, who is she? Did Caleb tell you he was bringing her here?”
One of them is Beth, but who are the other two?
“No, he just showed up with her.” Beth’s voice. “Did you see what she was wearing? She could’ve made a little effort.”
Ouch! I didn’t even know I was coming!
“Still, I’m glad she came.”
I remembered the voice. Harriet, was it?
“Caleb hasn’t done anything since I asked him to advertise my salon at the hotel, so she could be useful.”
Interesting. That was why Harriet had spoken to me. Utility before humanity. A familiar order.
“I don’t know. I really like her.”
Whoa. Who is that?
“Seriously, Marie?” Beth exclaimed. “Can you imagine Eleanor Evans sipping champagne with her at the family Christmas?”
“Yeah, seriously!” Marie confirmed. “She’s so different. Remember Caroline?”
I was beginning to like Marie, and my interest was piqued by whoever this Caroline was.
“Exactly,” Beth said. “They were a perfect fit. But this girl, she’s just so... different.”
“You mean she’s not white?” Marie blurted.
Brutally honest. I liked that. At least it was said out loud instead of wrapped in lace.
“We use some colour in our group, don’t you think?
” she continued. “She’s confident, chilled, and everyone seems to have taken a shine to her. You guys should give her a chance.”
I was about to walk in when I heard Beth say, “She’s in the bathroom now. I hope she doesn’t take anything. You never know with those people.”
That hurt. That freaking hurt. It wasn’t just the accusation. It was the ease with which it came. The certainty. But I wasn’t going to let it get the better of me.
Steeling myself, I walked in with my hands held up and out. “Nope, didn’t take anything at all. You can check my pockets if you like.”
I heard all of them gasp and take a step back. Fear flickered where judgment had been moments before.
“Can I help carry anything out to the back?”
Beth tried to look at me but couldn’t hold my gaze. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean—”
I smiled. It was the kind of smile you learn when anger would cost you more than silence.
“Yes, you did, Beth. It’s okay. You don’t know me.
You’ve made your assumptions, and I’ve made mine.
Guess we just have to prove ourselves.” I shrugged and continued.
“Please do let me know if you need any help at all.” I opened the fridge and helped myself to a bottle of water before leaving them staring behind me. That’ll teach them.
I stepped back out onto the patio, the late afternoon sun brushing my skin with a warmth that felt almost deliberate, as if it were trying to remind me that I was still allowed to take up space.
I let myself breathe for a moment, grounding myself in the smell of charcoal and grass, in the murmur of voices that had nothing to do with me.
Caleb was standing by the barbecue, laughing at something Greg had said.
Our eyes met, and his smile softened. That look shouldn’t have mattered as much as it did. And yet.
I headed towards the pool and sat down on the chair. A little girl with soft, brown hair came up to me.
“Could you please help me remove my ducky floats?”
“Of course, I can.” I released the valves and squeezed them to begin releasing the air. “My name’s Nyah. What’s yours?”
A voice from behind said, “That’s my Kate.”
I looked up and saw Marie.
“I’m sorry about before.” Her brown eyes fell away before looking back at me. “I’m Marie, by the way.” She stuck her hand out.
“Nyah. Nice to meet you,” I said, shaking her hand. “Kate’s a beautiful little girl.”
“Thanks. I’m glad you came.”
I pulled the floats off the girl, who went running off to whatever was next most important on her five-year-old’s agenda.
“Because I add a little colour to the group?” I asked.
Marie smiled abashedly and sat down beside me.
“Not the top reason, but yes.” A breeze flipped her brown hair across her face.
She held it back with one hand. “Don’t mind them.
Those two have always been like that.” She checked over her shoulder, confirming they were out of earshot.
“No one is ever good enough to enter the group, which is probably why Caleb never brings anybody. You’re a pleasant surprise.
Are you the reason he has been so different lately? ”
“I don’t think so,” I replied. “What makes you think that?”
“If you’d met him before, you wouldn’t need to ask.
I don’t think you would’ve been able to stand him.
” If she only knew. “Six months ago, he would’ve needed to be the centre of attention at a party.
Now...” She left the sentence unfinished.
“And he seems fine with that. I’ve never seen him this calm and composed. I hardly recognize him.”
I found Caleb across the crowd, and for a moment our eyes met. Marie was right; I hardly recognized him either. The man I’d learned to hate was... elsewhere.
At that moment, Greg shouted, “Enjoy the grub!”
Marie and I walked over to the meat-lovers’ paradise laid out on the table. Utterly famished, we all dug in.
The sun dropped towards the horizon. I felt I’d finally defeated the hangover with calories after devouring the cheesecake and went to stretch out on a sun lounger.
I was surprised it had turned out to be such a great day.
I had met some lovely people, laughed a lot playing a card game called Bullshit, and had enjoyed way too much food.
After resting my eyes for a few minutes, a touch to my arm brought me back to the present.
Caleb was crouched beside me. “Ready to go?”
I nodded and accepted his hand to help me stand up.
While bidding everyone goodbye, Greg gave me a tight hug and said, “I hope to see you again very soon, and more often.”
I smiled, turned to Beth, and thanked her while Greg walked with Caleb out to the sidewalk. From the corner of my eye, I saw Caleb’s face harden. He walked back to me, handed me the keys, and said, “Will you wait for me in the car?”
I took the keys, paused a moment, then turned and walked to the car. What’s that about?
Minutes passed.
I pinched the skin of my throat. Just as I was about to go looking, I saw him come back out and start walking towards me. He did not seem happy.
My mind ran through the events of the day. Had I said something wrong? Did I offend somebody in any way?
As we drove in silence, I saw that his knuckles were white from gripping the steering wheel so hard. What the hell happened in there?
Unsure of myself, I glanced over and said, “You were right.”
He looked back at me, his expression still hard. “About what?”
“Those were the best damn pork chops and beef ribs I’ve ever tasted. I’m glad I came... despite my initial reservations.”
He guffawed as his grip loosened.
“I had a good day. Thank you.”
He nodded and smiled.
I closed my eyes and enjoyed the drive home.