Chapter 27
CHAPTER TWENTY-SEVEN
When Carys pushed open the door of the bookshop the next morning, Duncan and Angus were waiting in the van and three patrons were in line to buy books from Donna, who was behind the antique desk that served as the sales counter.
“Carys?” Lakshmi called her from the back where a table was set up for coffee and tea. The goddess waved her over. “Come sit with me until Donna is finished. We’re almost ready for you.”
Carys walked over, and Lakshmi handed her a pretty teacup that smelled of oranges. “Ready for what?”
“White tea with orange and lotus flower,” Lakshmi said. “It will help you to find unity in your journey.”
“I need some very direct answers this morning,” Carys said. “I need to go to Annwn. I need to talk to my Shadowkin.”
“Seren does not have the answers you seek,” Lakshmi said. “She is just as lost as you are, though she will be with you in the journey. But you are correct that you must go to Annwn to seek answers.”
“Who then?” Carys asked. “Epona?”
“Epona is a goddess of the Shadows now.” Oshun spoke from the top of the stairs. “I’d ask forgiveness for ignoring you, but I don’t need it. I’m finishing a special piece right now.”
Carys could see Oshun on the landing above, bent over a wooden table. She couldn’t see what she was working on, but there was a blue light glowing under her hands.
Carys glanced at the customers lining up at the desk. “Do any of them have any idea who you three are?”
“Probably not.” Lakshmi sipped her tea. “Though there is a lovely coven who meets here on Thursdays for feminist book discussions, and two knitting clubs show up every other week.”
“Knitting clubs?”
Lakshmi nodded. “The fiber arts are some of the oldest forms of worship still left in the Brightlands. I always feel very energized after they visit.”
“Nice.” She sipped her tea and started to feel a little lightheaded. “Uh… Lakshmi?”
“Yes, my love?”
“You didn’t…” The world around her started to swim. “Uh…”
“Yes, Carys?”
She was definitely not herself. “Did you drug my tea?”
“Not really.” The goddess’s voice sounded hollow. “Well, maybe a little bit. It depends on what you consider a drug.”
Carys was woozy and very relaxed when Donna joined them in the tea nook.
“Sometimes,” Donna said, “it’s good to dull the rational mind when you need to visit a spirit realm.”
“Is… Annwn a spirit realm?” Her blinks were long, and everything felt like it was underwater. She didn’t feel drunk. No, everything was extra clear, but it was as if she was watching all this from outside her own body.
Her mind’s eye drifted up to Oshun’s loft, and she saw a blue flame glowing over the goddess’s table.
“You’ve probably been wondering why Angus has been hanging around, haven’t you?”
“Yes.”
The blue flame sparked again, and Oshun lifted a shining gold chain in front of Carys’s face. “This the collar of D?n, made of gold from her own body, purified by Lakshmi’s fire, and woven into a chain by my hand. Do you accept this gift?”
“What does it do?”
“Do you accept it?”
All of this is a choice.
“Yes.” Carys pushed the words from her mind to her mouth. “I accept it.”
“Good.” Oshun put the chain around her neck. “The shepherd will guide you to the otherworld, Tegan’s daughter.”
The gold collar felt light and heavy at the same time.
“What are you doing to me?”
“I am anchoring your spirit to your body.” Blue fire sparked from Oshun’s fingertips when she took the two ends of the chain and pressed them together. “So that Arawn’s hounds do not sniff out the scent of a living soul.”
Carys felt the warm weight of the gold sitting on the back of her neck. “Okay.”
“Keep D?n’s collar around your neck,” Oshun said. “It is now tied to your life, and it is yours to do with as you will. So until you are ready for death in this world, you must not take it off. That is the cost of your passage to the other land.”
“So if I remove this chain, I’ll die?” Carys would have panicked if she were capable of panicking. “What if it breaks by accident?”
Oshun smiled. “A chain made by the goddess will not break. Say ‘I accept your gift, Mother.’”
She opened her mouth, but nothing came out.
Oshun waited in endless silence.
“I accept your gift, Mother.” It was the only thing Carys could say.
Her mind drifted back into her body, and she was sitting on the couch again.
Donna was there, pressing a finger to her lips. “Listen before all else. Your time will be brief. Trust the shepherd and trust yourself.”
Lakshmi leaned forward and presented a teacup. “Drink and wake, Carys Morgan. Time runs swiftly, and the worlds within the worlds begin to blur.”
Carys blinked and was in the van, sitting in the back seat with Angus beside her.
“Is she awake yet?”
“Yes.” She cleared her throat. “Where are we going?”
“I’ve told Duncan where to go,” Angus said.
“It’s a sea cave, lass.”
“A sea cave?” She blinked and tried to sit up, but her entire body felt heavy.
“Never thought you were one for tattoos, but it suits you,” Duncan said.
“What?”
Angus touched her shoulder. “Don’t touch it. It’ll settle.”
Carys glanced down and saw the edge of a braided design, glowing red-hot beneath her skin.
“To the rest of them, it’ll look like ink,” Angus whispered. “Only those with eyes to see will know the Mothers’ mark.”
Carys nodded. “We’re going to Annwn?”
“We’re going as close as I’m permitted.” Angus shook his head. “But she should be able to reach you.”
Carys understood more than she knew. “I’m not going to talk to Seren, am I?”
“No, you are not.”
The rest of the drive passed in silence as Duncan took a twisting coastal road around the southern edge of the Gower Peninsula, driving past small seaside villages and bright beaches filled with holiday makers.
It was midmorning, and the air was crisp and cool.
“Turn right here,” Angus said.
The world around Carys was a blur of blue and green. She could smell the salt air and a metallic tinge that she suspected came from the heated metal under her skin.
“Up this road?” Duncan asked. “This isn’t even a road, man.”
“It’s where we need to go.”
The way grew rocky, and the van bumped along what felt more like a goat trail than a road. Carys heard waves crashing in the distance, echoing along the rocks that jutted from the earth’s crust where the ocean met the land.
“Here.”
“There’s no car park here,” Duncan said. “It’s just a wide spot in the road.”
“Because no one comes here, you idiot,” Angus said. “Stop the car and get out. I need your help for the first part.”
Carys felt like her body was weighed down with sand. She felt everything, but it was nearly impossible to move. Even lifting her legs to get out of the van when Duncan opened the door was a monumental effort.
“Come here, lass.” His gruff voice was as soft as it could be. “I’ll carry you.”
“I’m heavy.” It took effort to speak too. As if her tongue were weighted like her legs.
“Don’t be daft.” Duncan chuckled. “You’re nothing but a bit of thing, Carys Morgan.”
“She feels the weight of the Mothers’ blessing.” Angus hobbled out after Carys. “She’ll grow accustomed to it with time.”
“The tattoo?” Duncan peeked down her shirt. “It’s beautiful, but how does it look healed so quickly? I mean, I know they’re goddesses, but human skin is human skin.”
“Not a tattoo,” she managed to say. “Chain.”
“Aye, it’s beautiful.” He turned to Angus. “Where?”
“Follow me.”
Duncan carried her in his arms, climbing up a rocky trail between two fingers of land that jutted into the ocean. There was a rocky beach below them, and the sound of crashing waves echoed around her.
The world was a wash of gold and grey rock, vivid blue sky, and green brush that covered the tops of the hills. Everything moved in sacred rhythm.
Leaves caught by the wind.
Waves on rock.
The heart of the world breathing in and out.
In and out.
“Here.”
“Here?” Duncan ducked his head, and Carys was enveloped in darkness.
“Put her down.”
Carys smelled the pungent mineral scent of salt water on stone.
“She can barely move, Angus. I don’t know what they gave her, but—”
“Put her down!” Angus barked. “And stay here. You’re not to go a step farther, do you understand me? No matter what you hear, you stay here, boy.”
“Why?” Duncan lowered Carys carefully to her feet, bracing her until she found her legs. “I don’t like any of this. They gave her something back at that shop, and she can barely walk. If she falls—”
“I won’t.” She patted his shoulder, gripping it when she swayed.
“I’ll be okay. But if you go farther…” Carys breathed deeply when she found her feet, inhaling the scent of cedar and iron that always clung to Duncan’s skin.
“The hounds of Arawn would probably find you.” She pulled him down and pressed a kiss to his mouth.
“I’m kind of out of it, so don’t make me fight off otherworldly dogs, okay? ”
Duncan’s eyes met hers. “I don’t like any of this.”
“I know,” she whispered. “But I have to go.”
“Carys—”
“Love you so much.” She held out her hand and knew that Angus would take it. “Trust me. Trust Angus.”
“I trust you.” He glared at Angus. “I don’t know about this one.”
“Let me go.”
Duncan slowly released the grip he had around her waist, and Carys moved away from him.
Her legs still felt heavy, but she was getting used to the sensation.
It was a little like those heavy exercise weights people wrapped around their legs when training, only the sensation was all over.
As if her own bones had been turned to lead.
“Are you with me, Carys Morgan?”
She walked through the damp cave, holding Angus’s hand. “I’m with you.”
“Not much farther now.”
There was a narrow passage with a glowing silver light at the end.
Carys saw shimmering waves of light painting the walls, and as she emerged, she saw a familiar sight.
It was another silver pool, like the one in Angus’s own cave, but this one had a blueish-green, swirling light beneath it.
“This again?”