Chapter 32
Over in Howth, Noah was standing in the doorway of his mummy's friend Becca's house, staring at a strange man who'd just told him he was to come with him.
'Becca,' Noah looked up at her. 'My mummy says I'm not to go off with strangers, not even if they have sweets.
I think it's for the best I stay here until Poppa D comes to pick me up. '
'Noah, this is your Poppa D,' Becca said with a smile. 'And he's got some wonderful news.'
Noah stared harder at the stranger before shaking his head vehemently. 'No. It's not him.'
'It's me, Noah. Remember Nana told you I'd shaved my beard off?'
Noah's stance suggested he wasn't going anywhere. 'Prove it. Sing the Islands in the Stream song.'
Donal cleared his throat and crooned the opening lines.
'Poppa D!' Noah lunged at him, wrapping his arms around his waist while Donal ruffled the top of his head. 'I knew it was you. I was tricking.'
He hadn't been.
'If I'd known the upset me shaving my beard off was going to cause, I wouldn't have done it,' Donal said over the top of his grandson's head to Becca.
'Maureen's friend Rosemary Farrell came at me with a hiking pole on the high street earlier when I was out for a stroll with Pooh.
She put on a holy show, accusing me of stealing him and poking at me with the thing as though she were jousting. '
Becca laughed.
Donal didn't.
'Has Mummy had the baby yet?' Noah asked, letting go of his Poppa D.
'She has. You have a babby brother called Luke.' Donal’s smile reached each ear. 'You're a big brother now, so you are, Noah. What do you think about that?'
Noah quietly took this on board. Mostly he was relieved his mummy hadn't had a girl.
Girls smelled. Everyone knew that. Kiera quite often whiffed.
Aunty Moira said it was because she ate such a varied diet.
Aoife more often than not had something stinky in her nappy too, and Lottie, Becca's daughter, reeked of— He couldn't actually think of anything, so he contented himself with the fact that she simply reeked of being a girl.
He quite liked the name Luke too, although if it had been up to him he'd have called him Leonardo, from Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles.
Still, Luke was okay. Luke Skywalker was cool, but not as cool as Leonardo.
It was easier to say though. He said none of this aloud.
'I'm glad it's a boy, Poppa D. And did you know your face looks like a big shiny moon without your beard? '
Donal took it on the chin while Noah remembered his manners and thanked Becca for having him.
'You're welcome anytime, Noah. Be sure to give Mammy and Babby Luke a hug and kiss from me and Lottie. It's lovely, lovely news.' Then she whispered to Donal, 'Lottie adores him.'
Becca waved them off while Lottie blew kisses from the upstairs window. Once they were in the car, Donal explained that they'd swing by Noah's house first to collect his pyjamas, toothbrush and a change of clothes because he was staying with Nana and Poppa D that night.
Noah liked staying there because there were always treats involved, and Pooh might even sleep on his bed. He chatted away about the cream cakes Becca had picked up for his and Lottie's afternoon tea. 'They were delicious. D-E-L-I-C-I-O-U-S!'
'Well done.'
'Lottie's annoying though, Poppa D. She keeps trying to kiss me. I'll have to have a word with Becca about her behaviour next time. It's not very appropriate.'
He carefully began spelling it. 'A-P-P-R-O-P-I-A-T-E.'
Donal did his best not to laugh at his earnest grandson and certainly didn't have the heart to tell him he'd forgotten an 'R'. 'There'll come a time when you won't be complaining about girls trying to kiss you, Noah.'
Noah made a loud gagging noise before launching into a story about the awful onion-smelling relief teacher, Mrs Talley, and didn't stop talking until they pulled up outside his house.
The first thing they saw after letting themselves inside was the ginormous box containing the birthing pool.
'Now Mummy doesn't need it, Poppa D, do you think we could put it in the back garden for the ducks to swim in? Then when summer comes me and Luke can use it. I can teach him how to do water bombs.'
'Er, I don't think it's designed for outdoor use, Noah.'
'Oh, that's a shame.' He disappeared into the kitchen to dump his lunchbox on the bench before shooting upstairs to pack the things he'd need into his school bag.
Downstairs, Donal smiled as he heard Noah proudly announcing to Mr Nibbles and Stef that there was a new member of the family.
Noah was feeling very pleased with himself as he chomped his way through a slice of pepperoni pizza dripping with stretchy cheese.
He'd won the Great Dinner Debate between Nana, Aunty Aisling and Aunty Moira by declaring that, seeing as they were celebrating him becoming a big brother, he got to choose. He'd also insisted he should be allowed a glass of fizzy with his tea so he could clink glasses with the adults.
'I don't want you bouncing off the walls when we go to see Mummy later, Noah,' Maureen said, already pouring him a glass.
'Nana, I can handle my fizz. It's Kiera who bounces off walls.'
'That's true, Mammy, she does.' Moira held out her glass for a top-up. 'Be generous. I need the sugar hit after the shock, like.'
'I got a shock too, Nana.' Noah wiggled his glass hopefully.
'I warned you all about Donal shaving his beard off.' Maureen added another splash to Noah's glass before topping up Moira's.
'Yes, but it still didn't prepare us for the reality of it,' Moira said. 'It was very confronting to walk into the house and find a man we didn't recognise sitting in Donal's recliner.'
'It's true, it was. You look very different, Donal. I don't mean in a bad way, just in a—' Aisling floundered for the words she was looking for.
'Big full moon way,' Noah supplied. 'And I thought it was stranger danger when Poppa D came to pick me up, Nana. I told Becca I couldn't go off with him, even if he had sweets.'
'Good boy, Noah.'
Donal cleared his throat and picked up his glass. 'Can I propose a toast to the newest addition to the family, babby Luke?'
'To babby Luke,' echoed around the table.
Noah clinked glasses a little too enthusiastically and received a telling-off from Nana, but he didn't mind as he concentrated on sliding another piece of pizza onto his plate.
He pretended not to hear Nana warning that he'd make himself sick if he wasn't careful.
On principle, he got it down him anyway, despite beginning to feel a little queasy.
The pizza disappeared in no time, and Donal cleared the plates while Maureen tidied away the empty boxes. When Donal went to fetch his jacket, she told the girls it was the first time they'd enjoyed takeaway pizza without him getting stretchy cheese tangled in his beard.
They all stared at him when he reappeared jangling his car keys, announcing that if they left now, they'd arrive in plenty of time for visiting hours.
'He's still got some on his chin though, Mammy,' Moira whispered.
She and Aisling shimmed back into their coats.
Maureen pointedly tapped her own chin in Donal's direction before disappearing into the bedroom. She emerged carrying an impressive teddy bear dressed in a yellow-and-red gingham jacket, which she handed to Noah. 'Teddy is a present for you to give to Luke,' she said.
Noah would have liked the teddy for himself if he hadn't been far too big for cuddly toys. 'I'll call him Leonardo because Luke's too young to name him.' Anyway, Nana was bound to have bought him something more suitable for big boys.
She hadn't.
They climbed into Donal's car with Noah squashed in the middle between Moira and Aisling. He was feeling decidedly ambivalent towards Leonardo, who sat perched on his lap. 'Is it far to the hospital?' he asked as they bounced along.
'No, we'll be there in no time,' Maureen reassured him.
Noah promptly hiccupped, and threw up all over Moira's lap.
'Jesus wept!' Moira shrieked.
Startled by the sudden outburst, Donal braked hard, which only brought up even more sick. He pulled over to the side of the road and Moira threw open the passenger door before staggering out.
'How much pizza did you scoff, Noah?' she demanded, shaking globs of masticated pepperoni from her clothes.
Maureen climbed out wielding the wet wipes and did her best to clean her daughter up. 'Did I, or did I not, tell you not to have another piece of that pizza, Noah?'
'At least I wasn't sick on Leonardo, Nana,' Noah said regretfully.
The windows stayed wound down for the remainder of the journey and, once Moira had vacated the vehicle, the lingering smell of pizza vomit wasn't nearly as bad.
Despite the incident en route, Maureen announced they were blessed as Donal nipped into a parking space a stone's throw from the hospital's main entrance.
'I remember coming here to see Aunty Aisling after she had Aoife and Connor,' Noah said, trotting inside sandwiched between his grandparents.
He glanced down at Leonardo. He'd had to give the twins presents too.
His eye was caught by a bobbing blue balloon.
'Nana, can we get a balloon like that tomorrow?
Only a blue one with "It's a Boy" on it instead of "It's a Girl"?
' Noah pointed to a lady laden with gifts on her way to the lift, including the balloon.
Luke was getting short-changed, he thought, looking at Leonardo again.
'I don't see why not.'
The comings and goings along the corridor outside Roisin's room were much busier now that it was officially visiting hour, and there was no sign of the ward sister either.
Maureen tapped lightly on the door before shooting Noah an encouraging smile.
Shay called for them to come in and, when Donal appeared behind Maureen, both he and Roisin did a double take.
Luke was snuggled up asleep in the crib beside the bed.
'Mammy, you didn't tell us you were bringing your toy boy with you,' Roisin grinned.
Donal and Maureen chortled, and while Donal shook Shay's hand, kissed Roisin on the cheek and peeped into the crib, Maureen asked whether Shay's mam and dad, Philip and Jodie, had been in.
'Yeah, they're completely smitten with Luke and very proud of Roisin.
Mam was beside herself when she heard how he came into the world, so expect a phone call thanking you for the part you played in him arriving safely.
Actually, I'm surprised you didn't pass them on your way in.
' Shay rubbed at his five o'clock shadow.
'Oh yeah, they left something for you, Noah.
It's in the bag over there by the crib.' He winked at him.
Only then did they realise Noah was hanging back in the doorway, uncharacteristically shy.
Roisin pushed the tray table holding the remnants of her dinner aside and patted the bed. 'Come on up here for a cuddle and tell me about your day Noah. I could do with a hug from my boy.'
Maureen, sensing Noah's self-consciousness as he kicked at the floor, distracted everyone by asking Shay what he'd had for dinner.
Donal immediately caught on and remarked how tasty the remains of Roisin's rice pudding looked.
Noah looked uncertainly at the crib, then at the gift bag propped against the wall before slinking over, grabbing it and climbing up beside his mum.
She took the teddy from him, waggling it in front of his face until he laughed. 'Who's this then?'
'Leonardo. He's for Luke. And Mummy, I was nearly sick on him in the car, only it landed on Aunty Moira instead.'
Roisin shot a startled look at Maureen.
Maureen simply shook her head and mouthed, 'Don't ask.'
Noah rummaged inside the gift bag and pulled out a Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles jigsaw.
His whole face lit up and his ambivalent feelings towards Leonardo instantly disappeared.
'Can I do the puzzle before I go to bed?
' He looked beseechingly at Poppa D and Nana, who smiled indulgently and agreed that, seeing as it was a special day, he could.
'Mummy,' Noah carefully set the puzzle aside. 'I'm glad you and Shay didn't call Luke Peter.'
Roisin and Shay exchanged a bemused glance while Maureen suppressed a smile, recognising the reference to Perfect Peter from Noah's favourite stories.
Noah proceeded to tell them all about his day, with cream cakes, Lottie behaving inappropriately, stranger danger, fizzy drink, pepperoni pizza and being sick on Aunty Moira all featuring prominently in his monologue.
When he finally ran out of steam, Roisin asked, 'Would you like to hold your brother?'
Noah's eyes formed two circles. 'Can I?'
'Of course. You're going to have to help look after Luke when we get home tomorrow. It's what big brothers do.'
'I suppose it is quite an important job,' Noah said in that miniature-adult way of his, making everyone smile.
Shay carefully lifted Luke from the crib and placed the sleeping bundle into Noah's arms.
'Why does he look like a monkey?' Noah asked, gazing down at Luke's tiny screwed-up features.
'All babbies look like that,' Roisin explained.
'Did I?'
'You certainly did.'
Noah bent his head. 'Hello, Luke. I'm your big brother, Noah.' Then he placed the gentlest kiss on Luke's forehead.
Around the room, everyone suddenly found themselves blinking rather hard.