Chapter 9
Of all things Hunter could have said, Savvie hadn’t expected that.
“You killed your high school sweetheart?” She shook her head. “Surely, it was an accident.”
Hunter ran a hand through his hair. “I was young, invincible and stupid. Unfortunately, I took Sarah along for my ride of stupidity.”
“Okay,” Savvie said, “that’s clear as mud.” She took his hand and walked him to the stairs leading up to the war room and sat, pulling him down beside her. “Care to enlighten me?” she urged softly.
He shook his head. “Not really.”
“Then we’ll just sit here. I have nowhere else I have to be.” Her thoughts ran with what little he’d said. How could he have killed his high school sweetheart?
Had he been in a jealous rage? She looked at his face. The shadows beneath his eyes made him appear sad, even haunted.
Savvie hadn’t known Hunter long, but she knew this man wasn’t her stepfather. He would never hurt a woman in a fit of rage or anything else.
Hunter leaned forward and buried his face in his hands. For a long moment, he remained unmoving.
Savvie figured he wasn’t going to tell her what had happened. And she wasn’t going to press for the details. She understood the effects of trauma, having lived through her own version. If he didn’t want to talk about it, she wasn’t going to push him.
Not knowing how to comfort him, she laid her hand on his back. She didn’t move it up and down, just let it lay there on his taut muscles. She hoped that the warmth of her hand let him know she was there for him.
Hunter sat up straight and scrubbed a hand down his face.
“I was eighteen, a senior in high school, planning on going to college the next fall. Sarah and I had applied to the same university. We had our lives mapped out. We had a plan.” He stared straight ahead as if seeing his past replaying like a silent movie.
“It was February, and we’d had a cold snap.
It had started to rain, but it was Friday night.
I refused to let a little rain keep us home.
Sarah and I had planned a date to celebrate our third year together as boyfriend and girlfriend.
I wasn’t going to miss that. Wearing my best dress slacks, a button-down shirt and a blazer I’d borrowed from my father’s closet, I left my house and drove to town.
I had a bouquet of red roses, a necklace and a reservation at the restaurant where we’d had our first date. ”
He drew in a deep breath and let it out slowly before continuing.
Savvie sat quietly, listening without comment.
“I showed up at her house in my pickup. Her father mentioned that the weatherman predicted the rain would turn to freezing rain, and that I should get Sarah home before that happened.” His lips pressed together. “I promised I would.”
Savvie’s chest tightened, already guessing he hadn’t kept his promise.
“We went to the restaurant. I gave her the flowers and the gift. When our meal came, I overheard the wait staff whispering to each other that the weather was getting bad, and they might have to close early.” He shook his head.
“I blew it off. We finished our dinner. When we left the restaurant, the sidewalk out front was a little slippery.
Sarah nearly fell, but I caught her, and we made it to the car without further incident.
“It wasn’t until we left town that I realized how slippery the road was getting.
But I’d promised to get Sarah home. She lived a couple of miles out of town in the opposite direction from my folks’ place on a road that curved through the hills.
As I approached a particularly sharp curve, I pressed the brake to slow the vehicle.
I wasn’t going very fast, but I hit a patch of black ice.
The truck spun, sliding off the shoulder, down an embankment and into a pond. ” Hunter’s voice grew ragged.
Savvie’s breath lodged in her lungs.
“The front of the truck dipped down into the water. For a brief moment, I thought it would float. But then it sank into the icy water. I knew we had to get out before the cab filled completely. It was coming in fast and was bitterly cold, stealing my breath away.
“Once the engine submerged, it died, and the interior of the cab went dark. I struggled to unbuckle my seatbelt, finally getting it to release.
“Sarah couldn’t find hers. I reached across the console and pressed the button.
It didn’t disengage. The water rose to our chests.
I was floating, but Sarah was trapped in her seat.
When I reached into my pocket for the knife I carried everywhere but at school, I realized I’d left it at home in the jeans I changed out of earlier.
“I couldn’t cut the belt, the button wouldn’t release and the water had filled the cab up to Sarah’s neck.
Knowing I only had seconds, I pushed hard on the driver’s side door.
It wouldn’t budge. I pressed the button to lower the window.
It didn’t work. I leaned across Sarah and shoved against her door.
The water on the inside had equalized with the water on the outside of the truck, allowing the door to swing open.
“I pulled myself across Sarah, out her door and swam to the surface. I could see lights passing on the highway at the top of the embankment. If I could get someone to stop, maybe they’d have a knife. I dragged myself up the slippery slope to the highway.
“The clock was ticking. I knew that by then, the cab would be full, and Sarah would be underwater.
Not a single vehicle appeared. I waited one excruciating minute.
No headlights appeared. The freezing rain was accumulating on the road, in my hair and clung to my damp clothing.
I dove back into the pond, swam down to the truck and tried again to get the buckle to release.
Nothing I did worked. I tugged at the belt, trying to loosen it from across her lap, but it was tight, having cinched close when the truck had bumped down the embankment and hit the water.
“I stayed down as long as I could, then swam to the surface, took a breath and went back down. The cold slowed my movements and made it hard for my hands to clasp the seatbelt buckle.
“Sarah had gone limp. I could do nothing to free her. But I knew I had to try. I couldn’t leave her. Once again, I swam to the surface and dragged myself up the embankment.
“Headlights shone from around the curve. I stepped out into the middle of the road, half-frozen, not giving a damn if the oncoming vehicle hit me. It was moving as if in slow motion and stopped in the gravel on the narrow shoulder of the road.
“A man jumped out. I begged him for a knife so I could get Sarah out of the truck.
He handed me a flashlight and told me to shine the light into the pond.
I slid down the embankment behind him. The man dove into the pond; I tried to follow but could barely move.
I shined the light at the point where bubbles rose and prayed.
“After what seemed like forever, the man surfaced, his hand on the back of Sarah’s jacket, pulling her up behind him.”
Hunter looked into Savvie’s face, his brown eyes nearly black with grief.
Savvie’s heart pinched hard in her chest.
“She was blue and lifeless.” He stared down at his hands. “It was too late. She was gone.”
Savvie sat beside Hunter in silence, her heart aching for the eighteen-year-old whose first brush with death had been so tragic.
“I still have nightmares where I see her beautiful blue face, hovering in the water like a ghost.” He rested his hands on his knees and drew in a deep breath, letting it out slowly.
Savvie nodded. “I still have nightmares where my stepfather is a raging bull, charging toward me. Or of my mother staring at me, her words echoing in my head. What have you done?” She laid her hand over his and squeezed gently. “Hunter, you didn’t kill Sarah.”
“I didn’t save her,” he bit out.
“You tried.” Her words meant nothing to the man. Trying hadn’t kept his girl alive.
“I shouldn’t have taken her out in such bad weather. It was my fault she died that night. I should’ve died with her. So many times, I wished I had.”
“Is that why you joined the military instead of going to college?” she asked.
He nodded. “I had to get out of my hometown. I couldn’t face Sarah’s family. They were devastated. I couldn’t look into her father’s eyes. Because I broke my promise to him, his daughter was dead. Because I broke that promise, I killed her.”
“You didn’t kill her,” Savvie insisted. “It was an accident.”
Hunter pushed to his feet and paced the length of the barn.
Savvie stood but didn’t join him. He’d just unloaded the burden of his past on her. He needed to walk it off and collect himself.
After several more passes, he stopped in front of her.
“I’m sorry,” he said.
“For what?” she asked.
“You didn’t need to hear all that. It’s my problem, not yours.”
Savvie stood and touched a hand to his chest. “Thank you for trusting me to hear it.” She gave him a crooked smile. “We have something in common.”
He captured the hand resting on his chest. “That we both killed someone when we were teens? Not exactly a commonality I’d like to claim.”
“No. At a tender age, we both experienced hugely traumatic events that changed our lives forever.”
Hunter’s fingers closed around hers. He brought her hand up to his mouth and brushed his lips across the backs of her knuckles. “That makes us equally damaged. Is that supposed to be a good thing?”
“I think so.” She wrapped her other hand around his neck, leaned up on her toes and whispered against his lips, “It helps me to understand you better.”
His brow dipped. “How so?”