Chapter 54
Morning light floods the family kitchen as I stand at the counter. I still feel like an interloper as Nona brews coffee and Kesera sips at her disgusting green juice.
“I don’t know how you can drink that muck.” I shake my head at her.
“Yeah, Mom. You should be eating blini with us.” Nadia grins.
Kesera shakes her head and runs her hand across her flat stomach, meeting my eyes for a beat too long. Last night, I lay my head on the same place after making her come so hard that she almost blacked out.
“I’m watching my figure,” she says.
“I’d love you if you were the size of a house. Feel free to eat as many blinis as you want,” I say, sitting down with my black coffee and looking out at the view of the trees below.
Kesera comes over and lays a hand on my shoulder. I want to pull her into my lap, but I settle for wrapping my arm around her neck and drawing her down to kiss me.
Nadia’s voice breaks the moment and reminds me that I’ve still got a lot of work to do before I’m really part of this family. “God, you two are so gross.” She snorts a laugh.
I smile sheepishly at our daughter, throwing my arms wide. “You wanted me here. I’m happy to give you a hug too.”
“No. Lame.” She shakes her head and stalks out, and I grin at Nadia’s back.
The smile slides away as I look up at Kesera’s face, which is framed by the halo of golden curls. “Am I doing okay? Was that not the right thing to say?” I ask.
She leans down to kiss me. Her lips are cool and taste of fruit as I let myself sink into the warmth of her mouth, losing myself for a moment.
“You’re delicious, even when you taste of green juice.” I smile at her, but it must not reach my eyes because she circles the chair and sits on my lap, cupping the side of my face and rubbing her thumb back and forth along my scar.
“You’re going to get it wrong. And sometimes, there won’t be a right thing to say.” She leans back, watching me. “Are you sure you’re really up for this? Nadia’s going to blame you for being absent, and she’ll blow hot and cold sometimes.”
She stands and walks back to the counter, leaning against it as she pours a cup of coffee. I stand and walk over to cage her within my arms, resting my forehead against hers.
“I only stayed away because I thought it would be safer. It was never that I didn’t care.”
Kesera tilts back her head, her green eyes promising springtime. “It’s going to be difficult.”
I laugh against her curls, leaning down to whisper in her ear. “My life has never been easy. This will be worth it.”
On the counter, Kesera’s phone vibrates. She reaches over and breaks into a smile that lights her face as she bounces on her feet.
“I can’t believe it. He dropped the lawsuit. I never thought he’d let it go, even with other women coming forward.” She steps toward me, and I pick her up, spinning her around in my arms as she laughs.
Gently setting her on her feet, I smile down at her.
She reaches for my hand, almost shyly. “What are you doing today? I’m suddenly free. I was supposed to meet my lawyers. I can’t believe it.”
“You deserve it,” I say, hoping I sound surprised and not like a man who put a bullet in Jimmy’s head and then boxed him up in a half-full shipping container with instructions to dump everything into the Pacific.
“I still feel worried, but I don’t know why.” She goes to pick up the phone, and I walk behind her and circle her tiny waist with my arms.
Leaning down, I whisper, “I have a few ideas to keep you occupied.” I pull her against my body as the front door slams when Nadia leaves for school. “Let’s go back to bed. I’m free today too.”