Chapter 30 Briar
brIAR
My hands and wrists ache. Why does the cold hurt so much? My fingers and toes have it the worst, and I’ve never shivered as much as I am right now.
I think about a million things other than my situation. There’s no way Roman won’t believe me. He’s going to come down here and see me cold and wrap me in his arms. We’re going to take a hot shower, and then I can rest.
Rest. Warmth. Roman. I think those three things over and over.
Hours drag on, and the icy chill sets deeper into my bones.
But I don’t lose hope. I won’t lose faith in Roman.
How long has it been? I wonder. Is the farm completely destroyed?
I hope John passed on the note I found. Maybe they’re going there and capturing Callum without me.
I keep my mind as busy as I can. But I’m so cold.
Roman is going to hold me.
He will.
He will.
“Chloe?”
I jolt at my name, and alarm tears through me. Roman’s staring down at me with the most betrayed eyes. Pain flashes there before he sets his jaw, and everything kind and soft I’ve grown to love about him is extinguished with one harrowing glare.
He’s looking at me like I’m a prisoner.
I can’t even begin to conjure any words. Why didn’t I just tell him my real name? Of all the things to be the final straw in his trust. Of course, it’s my name.
“Roman. I didn’t do it. I didn’t know the beer was drugged.” I try to explain, but his face remains impassive. “Please. Roman, you know me. I wouldn’t do this… Please.” Resorting to begging is a new low for me. It feels like a pile of stones in my gut.
“Chloe,” he says it again. Dully. No anger or emotion. His jaw flexes, and he disregards my trembling body. “You will meet with Callum as planned tonight. We’ll prep you five minutes before we go.”
“Roman? Roman, wait!”
He slams the metal door behind him and it makes an awful, hollow sound.
I stare down at where my hands are. It’s too dark to see a fucking thing, but I’m so disappointed in myself. Why is this happening? I grit my teeth and hang my head.
I cry until there are no tears left to shed. There’s no telling how much time has passed by the time I fall asleep against the pipe I’m tied to.
It’s long enough that I’m woken by pangs of hunger and ebbing cold that makes it difficult to move my limbs.
He didn’t believe me.
He didn’t even care to hear what I had to say.
It’s pitch-black, and yet I can see all the broken parts of my heart as if I’m holding them in my palms. I’m not sure I can be put back together again for a second time. Not after Callum. Not after Roman.
It’s John who retrieves me from the water heater room.
He’s wearing a fabric mask that covers the majority of his face with only his eyes and brows exposed. A small tuft of his blond hair peeks from just the edge of the mask over his forehead.
“Come on. You should freshen up before meeting him.” John helps me up, but I shrug him off and glare.
“I don’t need your help.” Even though my bones and muscles ache, I force myself to walk with my head held high.
He stands post outside the bathroom door while I shower. Steam rolls off my shoulders, and I breathe a little easier with the warmth creeping back into me.
Roman’s just angry that I lied about my name. He’s going to keep his promise. I know he won’t let anything bad happen to me tonight. Even if everything we had is over, he’s still going to uphold his end of our bargain.
I fist my hand against the tiles and allow myself to take a settling breath before rinsing out my hair.
John gives me a bulletproof vest and black casual clothing—a knit sweater and jeans. There are still tags on them, so someone must’ve gone to the store today and bought them for me.
“Will you guys be nearby?” I ask with a shallow breath.
John glances at me. All softness that existed there before has long since dissipated. “Yeah. This operation is going to be smooth.” His cold voice makes chills spread over my arms.
I nod. “And what happens to me when it’s done?”
He doesn’t answer me, just keeps his arms crossed and looks the other way.
They are treating me like a traitor. I feel so stupid for thinking we were ever closer than that.
When we head back upstairs, the squad is suited up and lingering by their crotch rockets.
Their heads lift to acknowledge us as we pass.
They are dressed in their motorcycle gear—helmets, gloves, jackets—and yet I know exactly which one is Roman.
He’s taller than the rest. And he has a terrible habit of leaning on things.
He’s also the only one who won’t look at me.
I straighten my shoulders and force my eyes to the vehicle ahead. It’s the Benz. I give John a curious look. Is he going to drive me there while the others follow behind?
He extends his hand. I notice he’s holding something, so I lift mine and flinch when he drops keys into my hands.
“Your car was destroyed in the fire. So take this one. Consider it our parting gift. If you don’t go to the laundromat, we’ll put an order in with the Dark Forces to have you exterminated.” John’s tone is monotone, and it digs that knife a little further into my heart.
I break and cave to my emotions, turning and looking directly at Roman. “That’s it? You’re sending me on my way to meet with the devil, and then that’s it? You won’t even talk to me before I go?” My jaw trembles, and I clutch my fists tightly at my sides.
Roman doesn’t move. He doesn’t look at me. He doesn’t even acknowledge that he heard me.
Fire burns deep in my chest. I refuse to let them see me cry again.
I brush past John and don’t look back at any of them. Not as the garage door opens. Not as I pull out onto the highway. And not as I drive down the long, dark road toward the laundromat.
It crosses my mind to just say fuck them and leave town, but I’m tired of running from my past. I don’t want to run from them too.
It’s time to face my problems.
I pull up to the laundromat, which is eerily surrounded by nothing but farmland, much like the diner.
It’s an older building with a flat roof.
Windows make up most of the walls, and there’s a minty-green glow from the tiles.
Lines of washing machines and dryers make up the aisles inside with a few of those old-timey metal laundry carts I remember playing in as a kid.
Two a.m., and there’s not a car in sight. Not a soul inside that I can see.
My fingernails curl into my palms as I get the courage to step out of the car and head inside. A small bell dings over the door, and elevator music plays in the background.
The intimate sensation that I’m being watched sends chills up my spine. It’s terribly bright in here, and I can’t see a thing outside with how dark it is. I swallow nervously and walk slowly around the aisles. I’m the only one here.
Ten minutes pass by agonizingly slow. I sit between the washers and dryers, shielded from the windows. I know the Icarus Squad is out there somewhere waiting for Callum to show up. I can’t stand the idea of their eyes on me. At least I’m shielded from that much for the time being.
I go over what I’m supposed to do once Callum shows up and try not to think about the fallout with Icarus.
A soft clicking interrupts the elevator music and draws my attention. I shift to my feet and stand slowly. There in front me, like a ghost from my past, is Callum. Or perhaps I’m the ghost, since he thought I was dead.
His dark hair is now shaved on the sides and tapered on top. He’s not the man I once loved. The eyes that take me in are only that of the man who thought he finished me off and left me to rot, not the Callum I let into my life for an entire year.
Neither of us utters a word. We stare at each other with bitter expressions. His hands are tucked into his black trench coat pockets. He takes me in and looks me over like he’s still making sure I’m real.
“Chloe.” He says my name as if it’s something lovely. “You know, I brought flowers to your grave every week, only to find out you were never in it.” His voice wraps around me like a viper. Smooth and filled with dark intent.
I steel my heart. “Sorry to disappoint you.” I keep my tone even.
His brows soften, and he takes a step closer.
It takes everything in me to stay where I am.
“Disappointed? Chloe, I’ve died every day since I thought I killed you. I yearned to pull you from the earth, rotted or not, and hold you again.” He closes the distance between us and gently swipes my hair back from my face.
He was always a master manipulator. A wordsmith who was all too easy to fall for. He knows how handsome he is. And he knows how dearly I once loved him.
“You did kill me,” I whisper, staring into his beautiful blue eyes. “You killed me in every way a person can be killed. Chloe is dead.”
He seems stunned for all but a moment before his lips curl into a dark smile. “Yes, you go by Briar now.” He lowers to one knee and presses a kiss to the back of my hand. He looks up at me, hope flickering across his eyes. “And what a rebirth you’ve undergone. I barely recognize you.”
My heart twists, and I try to keep my expression free of the pain that moves through me. I loved him thoroughly. As no one ever should, only to be left for dead. I force a tight smile.
“You look well too.” I manage to get the words out without spite stinging my tongue. “Mind telling me why you had to burn my farm down to deliver your note?”
Callum stands and grins like it’s some silly prank he pulled.
“Because any trace of the Dark Forces is going to be scrubbed clean from Bane Falls. That little group you’ve been entertaining has been pretty crafty keeping their presence known as the town’s bad boys.
Grahm had no clue that they were secret soldiers until you came along. ”
“What have you gotten yourself into, Callum?” I whisper.
A wicked smile spreads across his lips. “You mean what have I built. I’d love to show you, Chloe.” His tone is as endearing as ever. I’d be an utter fool to fall for his antics again.