Chapter 14
"This is so incredible," she gushed. "You've been a total inspiration on my fitness journey and I've known for just ages that if we actually met there would be incredible sparks.
And I'm right, aren't I? This is just amazing.
I know you feel it too. Now, if you'll give me your phone I'll put my number in because really, who wants to start a relationship through DMs anyway—"
She politely but emphatically evicted Zojurn's hand from Luke's arm as he gave a quiet, relieved gasp.
Sabrina offered him a brief, tight smile, and when Zojurn came at him again, put herself in front of him as if she was the one pushing six and a half feet in height, not standing five foot two in bare feet.
"We're thrilled you're such a fan of Luke's channel," Sabrina said crisply.
"But of course you understand that even public personas have private lives—"
"Gym Bun doesn't have a private life," Zojurn snarled. "He's never once mentioned a girlfriend and I've been following him for years."
"Yes," Sabrina said steadily, "that's what private life means, you see.
Now, I'm sure you'd rather step back and give Mr. Jones his space rather than cause any more of a scene and ruin Mindy's wedding, wouldn't you?
That's wonderful. Let me suggest the snack bar.
I'd recommend something carby to absorb some of the alcohol that I'm sure is a factor in this little incident. "
"I haven't been drinking!"
"Jesus," Sabrina said, sounding heartfelt even if it wasn't the most tactful thing she could have said, "you mean you're like this sober?
Ma'am, you might want to take a step back and reconsider your life choices.
Luke, this way, please?" She turned toward him, put a hand on his elbow, and bustled him away from Zojurn776 while the woman spluttered indignantly.
Fortunately, the whole thing had caught some, but not lots, of attention.
When Luke glanced back, a handful of people were getting in the way, blocking Zojurn from following them.
A number of those people were ping-ponging their gazes between him and Zojurn, trying to figure out the source of all that fuss, and Luke saw at least one of them also recognize him.
They, at least, didn't try a repeat performance, and then there was enough crowd between them that Luke no longer felt like a target.
Wow, his rabbit breathed. Wow, did you see that. She's so fierce. Our mate is SO fierce. She'll protect the kittens like nobody's business! Wow! Go Sabrina GO!!!!
Sabrina Keep was indeed going. Steering Luke through the crowd with a single-minded intent, until she got him out onto a patio lit by distant neon and close-up amber lights. Then she dropped his elbow and stared up at him. "Gym Bunny?"
"I thought it was funny," Luke said weakly. "Gym bunnies, ski bunnies, surf bunnies—I don't really know if there are surf bunnies—they're usually tiny cute women, right? So I thought being a giant dude called Gym Bunny would be funny."
Also you turn into a rabbit, his rabbit said helpfully.
Yes, I know that, but she doesn't, and I can't exactly show her out here, can I!
He felt the rabbit looking around the patio, which had two fake shrubs and a real palm tree at its edge, but which was otherwise entirely in the sight-line of anybody who happened to walk by, or look out a hotel window.
I guess not, it said in obvious disappointment.
So you should go to your room and show her your rabbit! Then she'd understand!
Again, 'show her my rabbit' is… Luke didn't even have words for what it was, and more importantly, Sabrina was still staring up at him like he was a lunatic. "So. 'Gym Bunny.' You mentioned social media. How many followers do you have…?"
Luke wrinkled his face. "About a million and a half? Across all the platforms, I mean?"
"A mih." That was as far as she got in echoing his answer. "A mih," she said again, and then a third time before she stopped trying to say the words 'a million and a half' and moved on to, "So…I was really condescending, then, about probably making more money than you do."
Luke, taken completely by surprise by that being her first thought, laughed out loud. "Maybe? I do all right. Does that mean you're not mad at me?"
"I'm not mad, but jeez, Luke, what if one of The Girls had recognized you? I'd have looked like an idiot, not knowing my new boyfriend was an influencer!"
"I actually straight-up told you I was keeping it from you because I didn't want to make it weird," Luke said sheepishly, and Sabrina's jaw dropped open.
"Good grief. You did. You actually did. Holy cow. You even told me you had dozens of social media girlfriends who told you everything about your lives together and that it was weird. Oh my God. You…sneak!"
Luke hunched his shoulders apologetically. "It's weird, being a social media celebrity. Even a minor one. I don't get recognized a lot, so I figured it wouldn't be an issue. I'm sorry. I'm really sorry."
Her eyes widened. "Wait a minute. You said you were off on yoga retreats and fitness somethings this summer. Were you getting paid for those? Not just going to them?"
He hunched even more and Sabrina flung her hands up, repeating, "Oh my God, you sneak. Okay, um, but what if any of them are your followers? They're going to know you weren't in Virtue all summer!"
"Did you ever say I was in Virtue all summer?"
Sabrina paused, then blinked a few times.
"Oh. Huh. No, I said you were from Virtue, I think.
Actually I might just have said we met at the parade.
I was trying to keep it light on the details.
I guess maybe you could have been home for weekends or something.
Although didn't you say you were in Europe! "
He smiled down at her lopsidedly. "We went through all of this in the first place," he reminded her gently.
"Remember? It's just you know more about what I was doing now.
Nothing has to change about our story. I really am sorry I didn't clarify it, though.
I should have. I just…I didn't want it to be weird.
And now I'm going to make it weirder by saying that I also didn't want you to… "
"Be influenced by it," Sabrina said. "No, that makes sense. I assume even at minor levels of celebrity, although for the record I'm not sure a million and a half followers is minor—"
"It is."
She eyed him in a very 'if you say so' way, and went on.
"—I assume there are more people like Zojurn out there, who either think they already have a relationship with you or want one because they see you as having some kind of power.
So I can understand being kind of cautious about telling a woman you've just met what exactly you do for a living. "
"It's different with you, though," Luke said earnestly. "I know you won't try to take advantage of me."
"Why," she asked, amused. "Because I'm fifteen inches shorter than you, and how could I?"
"No, because you're amazing. And also, God, Sabrina, you're amazing! You dealt with that woman like you'd done a stint in professional body guarding! How did you learn to do that?!"
Sabrina hid her face in her hands. "I imagine myself in the Orange Safety Vest of Power."
He took her hands away from her face so he could look into her eyes and fight down a grin. "The what?"
"I was at a concert one time with another short friend, and she found a high-visibility vest, you know the bright orange ones?
Or yellow? The ones road construction crews wear?
And security at concerts? So she put the vest on and started telling people that they needed to let the short people through to the front so they'd be able to see.
And people did! And she lost it and was like 'oh my god, no, I'm just screwing around with you,' but I realized that people respond to perceived power really well, so if I'm in a situation that needs controlling I just imagine I'm wearing a safety vest and that people are just going to listen to me because of it. It almost always works."
"That is absolutely incredible," Luke said sincerely. "Honestly, it was one of the sexiest things I've ever seen. I hope she waited until you were at the front."
Sabrina beamed, blushed, then blinked in confusion. "What? Zojurn? No? I just made her go away?"
"No, no, your friend. I hope she didn't confess to messing with people's heads until you were at the front so you could see the concert."
"Oh! Hah! Well, I mean…" Sabrina looked guilty, and Luke laughed.
"Good for her. And you. And also that kind of makes sense, doesn't it, letting the short people stand in front. Although I guess that'd suck for us if we went to a concert. We wouldn't be able to stand together."
"No, but I could probably sit on your shoulders," Sabrina said wryly. "Maybe not for three hours, but…" She exhaled and stepped closer, smiling up at him crookedly. "Okay, well, got any other big surprises for me?"
THIS! IS! OUR! MOMENT!!! TELL HER!!!!
For once, Luke kind of agreed with his rabbit. He hesitated, trying to figure out how to broach the subject, and Sabrina's eyes widened. "Oh. Oh, jeez, I was kidding. You actually do have another surprise?"
GO LUKE GO!
Please be quiet, Luke said desperately to the rabbit, and then aloud, "I do, but it's…
it should probably wait until we're back in Virtue.
It's more personal than my career. But not bad," he said hastily as worry came into Sabrina's eyes.
"Honestly, it's not bad. I'm not sick or anything.
Or married. Or the father of a dozen secret love children. "
"Good grief, I hope not. Um. Okay. Are you sure you don't want to tell me now?"
Luke tilted his head and groaned at the distant desert sky. "I can't right now, because you literally wouldn't believe me. It's very much a 'needs visual proof' kind of thing."
When he looked back at her again, Sabrina was downright smirking.
Heat swept his entire body, not in a sexy way, and even his rabbit collapsed, melodramatically gasping Roasting!
Rabbit! inside his head. Luke, faintly, said, "Oh my God.
Not that either. I mean I don't think I'm a physical embarrassment, but…
it's not in 'seeing is believing' territory. "
Sabrina began to giggle, and Luke's blush worsened.
He put his face in his hands, and Sabrina's giggles turned to outright laughter before she pulled his hands down, stood high on her toes, and kissed him.
"I really like you, Gym Bunny Jones, and I'm really looking forward to getting back to Virtue so I can find out what it is I have to see to believe. "
It's me, his rabbit said, confused. I'm what she has to see to believe. What does she think she has to see to believe?
The rabbit you want me to show her, Luke replied, and broke down in laughter himself when the rabbit blinked at him, baffled.
"We should go back in," Sabrina said, grinning. "We should definitely go back in, because if we don't and anybody notices, I'm going to catch hell for sneaking off with my hot boyfriend instead of staying with Mindy on her big day."
"Isn't sneaking off with a groomsman a wedding tradition, though?" Luke offered his arm.
Sabrina slipped her hand into the crook of his elbow, smiling. "I don't know, I've never snuck off with one before, and I'm not tonight, since you're not a groomsman. You look fantastic, though. I don't think I said, before."
"I don't think you did," Luke agreed as they went back in. "You were too busy being flattered by my architectural observation of your columnar-ness."
She snickered. "You're more foundational, I'd say. Just for the sheer size of you. But you do look great. I'm—oh. Uh-oh. Incoming." She nodded toward Jan and Gina, who were beelining toward them without their men in tow.
Gina hissed, "I knew I recognized him," at Sabrina from several feet away, and Jan said, "Derek follows you," to Luke, who raised his free hand apologetically.
"Sorry. I wasn't trying to fly under the radar, but I never assume anybody is going to recognize me."
"Derek did!" Jan repeated in deeply personal outrage.
"He just didn't say anything until we saw the commotion and I wondered what that was all about.
He was all like, somebody probably recognized Luke, and I was like, what do you mean, recognized him, and he was like, he's Gym Bunny, you know, the fitness influencer I like?
and I was like what do you mean he's an influencer!
?!?!?' and Derek was like jeez, I didn't know you'd think it was a thing.
It's a thing," she said, now to Sabrina, slightly aggressively. "Why didn't you say?"
"Honestly? Because I didn't know until just now, either. Luke didn't want it to be a thing. And I can't blame him, you know?"
Jan's eyes widened. "Whoa. That's a big secret."
"I don't know," Sabrina said thoughtfully. "I think it makes sense. Being famous, even a little bit famous, has got to be kind of weird. It must be reassuring to know somebody likes you for who you are."
Gina said, "Aww," and even Jan softened a bit as Luke's rabbit said she wuuuuuuuuuvs us!!!!!
That is not what she said, Luke replied, amused. But she likes us. Which is good.
"All right, well, Mindy wants to talk to you," Gina added. "You, Sabs, not Gym Bunny here. Is that okay, if we steal her from you for a while?"
NO!!! THEY CAN'T STEAL OUR! FATED! MATE!!!
Luke chuckled. "It's fine. If you keep her all night, she knows where to find me after bedtime."
Jan and Gina both went, "OooOOOOoooh," very obligingly, and took Sabrina off with them as Luke's rabbit gasped in outrage.
They're stealing her! They're stealing our fated mate!! Get her back! GO LUKE GO!
They're only borrowing her, Luke promised, still chuckling. Now go to sleep, like I'm going to do.