Chapter 25
EVERLEE – WHEN YOU ENJOY BEING PUNISHED
We climb back into the car while Brady puts my dress and their vests in the trunk. I sit on the seat on the right side, while Jax and Knox sit across from me, and Emmett and Callum sit along the back.
“I hope you’re happy,” Callum says, then continues in the same dry tone, “You’ve doomed us to a life in prison.”
I chuckle, my gaze drifting back to Jax even as my thoughts refuse to let go of the private moment we shared earlier. My mind is still looping his words, searching for the meaning he didn’t say out loud. I know what I think they mean. What I want them to mean. But it’s kind of crazy. Right?
I shake my head to clear my thoughts. “Well, I love the dress and would still like to pay you for it.”
“Not going to happen,” Emmett says, reaching forward to put his hand on my leg.
“Get the whips and handcuffs ready,” Jax mumbles under his breath.
I cast a flirtatious side eye at him, and he shakes his head, not offering even a hint of a smile.
“She will not comply,” he says coolly, enunciating the last word.
“Comply?” Callum echoes, dripping sex, like it’s more of a challenge.
Jax rubs his hands over his face like he’s frustrated. “No.”
I thought they were kidding earlier, but now I’m beginning to wonder.
I know they honestly wouldn’t do the eye thing, but they seemed slightly worried about tomorrow night.
Perhaps I should make a concession and wear underwear…
but also… should I? They’d have to learn if we’re together, they aren’t always going to get their way.
They’ve always been so in control, but I don’t like being controlled.
Sure, I will make concessions. Relationships are give and take, but I won’t let them dictate what I wear.
“Is Brady dropping me off?” I ask, turning to look out of the window.
“No,” they all say in unison, voices firm.
“Excuse me?” I say with a flair of sass. They don’t strike me as the type to want a yes person, and I’m never going to be that. A fact that should be stated in our talk later.
“You aren’t going home. We’re taking you home to punish you,” Jax says without mirth.
“You say that like it’s a bad thing, but I love being punished by you.” I snipe back. A smile curls at the edge of Knox’s lips, and I feel like Emmett’s too, but his beard hides most of it. Callum and Jax keep up their grumpy faces. I continue, “I don’t have clothes at your house.”
“You do,” Jax says matter-of-factly.
“I don’t.”
“We got you a few outfits from Loveuz and put them in a closet for you.”
“You bought me clothes and gave me a closet?”
“Yes,” Jax says simply, cutting his eyes at me.
“Are you still mad at me?” I tilt my head to the side, trying to be cutesy, but he only glares at me. “I thought you would like the dress.”
“We fucking love the dress!” Knox chimes like a puppy, waiting for his turn to play.
“Just not on you. In public,” Jax adds.
“It’s not that bad.”
Jax rubs his hands on his pants. “Everlee.” My name from his lips slices through the car.
“You…” he struggles. “You are going to be the hottest woman by far in that room tomorrow night. You’re going to have so many eyes on you.
Men and women alike. You’re going to have men jacking off in the bathroom to images of you in that dress.
” He leans forward, resting his forearms on his legs.
“You are ours. Ours alone. We share you. But we don’t want to share you with anyone else. In no way. Physically or mentally.”
His words hit with such unfiltered honesty that a lump rises in my throat, thick enough to choke off my next breath. Well, fuck. Now I feel guilty for wanting to wear the dress. “Fine. But now I have no dress.”
Jax sighs, rubbing his hands over his face. “You can wear the dress, but you will not leave our side the entire night.”
“That’s all well and fine, but you aren’t going into the bathroom with me.”
“Want to bet?”
I sigh, wanting to change the topic. “Can we have our talk now?”
“No!” Knox blurts. Almost like he’s scared it’s going to be bad.
I wink at him. “It’s not bad. I’m not going anywhere.
I don’t have to be married and kids…” My words fall off with this one because this is the one I’m still on the fence about, but like a person who tries to climb over a chain-linked fence and gets their pants stuck on a point at the top and they’re now hanging over the side.
I’m mostly on one side with a flailing ankle on the other.
“I’ll be okay with no kids because I’ll have Knox. ”
“Mama.”
“Call me mommy,” I tease, trying to keep the conversation as light as possible. Then another thought creeps in. Why are there never any mommy kinks? Always the daddy, but never the mommy. I will have to reach out to the Cliterati.
I shake my head, getting back to the conversation.
“I’ll be honest. This is the one that I was stuck on the longest for several reasons.
I think I’ll be fine without kids. I will be the best auntie to Lizzy’s brood, because she’ll likely have no less than twelve.
But,” I pause, looking at them all. “Is that something you’re okay with? ”
They look confused.
“I saw you at the Easter event. I watched you all, and your faces lit up around the kids. And I’ve seen it repeatedly.”
Callum chimes in. “We can’t have kids.”
A hollow ache settles deep in my chest. “Can’t?”
“Physically we can, but we just can’t.”
“Because of your childhood?” This is getting deeper than I meant it to go.
“Yes, and our lifestyle.”
“Nick Cannon does it,” I retort playfully.
Callum tilts his head at me with an amused smile.
“It’s not the exact same, but damn. Imagine if he had one big, ass mansion, and they all had a wing.
It would be so much easier for him. Maybe he does.
I don’t know.” I clasp my hands together.
“Look, I’m not trying to change your minds about kids.
I’m not na?ve enough to think it can happen in the back of a limo and in one conversation.
I just want to make sure you all are thinking about the long term, too.
I’m sure you have, but…” I shake my head.
“I don’t know. You all would just make excellent fathers, and I don’t want you to let what happened in your childhood dictate your future. ”
“What about your family?” Knox asks, knowing that was—is—a big thing for me.
Taking a deep sigh, I glance out of the window, trying to put all the random thoughts into a string of words.
“I don’t have an answer for that one yet.
Marriage was easy, kids was a little more difficult, but my family.
That’s tough. Lizzy and Beckett know. At some point, I will have to come out to my parents, but I don’t know when or how.
I won’t push them away, but I will need to tell them.
At the end of the day, you all will be my life.
While I love my family and they love me, they will eventually pass on, and I don’t want what could be with us to be pushed aside for them.
My hope is that over time, I will figure out a way to tell them—show them—that this is good.
We are good. And hope their love for me outweighs their thoughts on our relationship.
” My hands fidget in my lap as I continue to watch the cars pass by.
I count them for a moment, just to get out of my head.
My parents accepted Beckett, and I hope they will accept me. It will just take some time.
“Anything else?” Callum asks after a minute.
Taking a deep breath, I refocus and sit back in the seat. “Yes. Actually. You will not control me. I don’t know how this has worked for you in the past, but I’m my own person. We can discuss things, but you will not demand.”
The air seems to lift in the car some and Emmett leans forward. “So I can’t demand you to come?”
“And I can’t demand you to sit on my cock?” Callum says.
“Or suck me off?” Jax adds.
“Or...” Knox fumbles, then throws his hands in the air. “Man! I was unprepared. Y’all should have told me!”
We all laugh, and just like that, the heavy mood in the car lifts.
In some ways, I feel this decision required more time, but in other ways, it’s something I’ve been toying with for months.
I left, but they were never gone for me.
Sure, I avoided them for almost two months, but they were never not on my mind. Every. Damn. Day.
Always wondering what it would be like. What it could be like. What we could do differently.
“Now, where do we go?” I ask.
“Like from here, emotionally or physically?” Knox asks.
“Shut the fuck up!” Jax shoves him over.
“What? I thought it was a valid question.”
“Come here, baby.” I pat the seat beside me, and Knox steps across the car and lays his head on my bosom.
My bosom, not my breasts. It sounds more motherly and less erotic to say bosom unless they are bouncing.
Bouncing bosoms sounds like it would be in a smut book written by a man.
Or maybe her heaving, supple, satin smooth, 72DDD breasts that bounced joyfully whilst she popped up and down on my fifteen-inch-long cock that measures nine inches in diameter whilst my gigantic biceps with a circumference of sixty-nine inches holds her upright.
That would definitely be written by a man in a book. So many measurements.
“Thank you, Mommy.” He cuts his eyes up at me, so I rub his head.
“Is this going to be a thing now?” Jax chomps. “If so, we may need to revise this arrangement.”
“I’ve got two bosoms.” I hold my arm out.
“Cupid,” he states simply, using my safe word.
“Can we get some dinner? I’m starving,” I say after my stomach rumbles.
“It’s like a sound machine down here,” Knox says, sitting up.
Callum presses the intercom button for the front. “Brady, can you please take us to McCrory’s?”
“Sure thing.”
Another date. Us just going out. Simple. Easy peasy, lemon squeezy. I’m so happy right now I feel like I could burst at the seams. Like a rainbow would literally split me in half and shoot out of me.
This is going to be good. We are going to be good.