Chapter 35
I am still shaking when Elena guides me to the couch.
As soon as she sits down, keeping some distance between us, I close the gap and curl up into her side.
She doesn’t waste another second and puts her arms around me.
My tears drip down, hot and thick, but it feels as if I can finally breathe again.
Even if it’s with hiccups and gasps in between.
She carefully strokes my hair, her heartbeat steady beneath me, but doesn’t move to do anything else.
She is giving you space. I know it won’t change. Not until we talk.
“W…what are you… scared of?” I manage to push out.
She tenses for a moment and I feel her muscles go rigid. But instead of pulling back, she pulls me closer against her chest. She lets out a shuddering breath that tickles my neck. My skin responds by pebbling into goosebumps. Why do you feel so comfortable with her even though she broke your heart?
“I thought I was scared of losing everything I worked so hard for. My job, my calling, my crew. Maybe it sounds pathetic to some, but… it’s my whole life.”
She stares off in the distance, clenching her jaw. I look at her, registering the storm of emotions behind those eyes. Slowly they come back into focus.
“At least, that is what I thought. Until…”
The abrupt stop makes me frown. “Until what?”
The small smile that curls up at her lips softens her entire face.
She finally looks down at me, her eyes filled with something I can’t quite name.
Her hand moves from my shoulder to my chin.
She puts her index finger underneath it and brushes her thumb over my bottom lip. I shiver, my mouth parting slightly.
“Until you.”
She smiles again and closes her eyes for a moment.
“Maya, you have turned my world upside down. I never wanted more, but here we are. Now I want it all… and that frightens me.”
“You want it all?”
“Yes. I want to come home to you. To have your smell on my hoodie. I want to chuckle while rearranging my car seat because you have shorter legs…”
“Hey!”
I scoff and she chuckles. I can’t suppress a grin and she lets out a huffed giggle.
We freeze and stare at each other, the silence stretching between us when something snaps.
Before I can stop myself, laughter bubbles from my gut.
The sound is equally joyful and disturbing, but enough to make Elena lose it too.
Her huffs turn into full laughter as well, and before we know it, we can’t stop.
The tears stream over our faces and our bodies shake as the tension is finally released.
At some point my shoulders relax and I nestle closer to her without thinking.
Elena instantly stops laughing—just as abruptly as she stopped speaking earlier.
It takes my brain a second to catch up, before I make a weird constricted sound in the back of my throat.
She is looking at me so intensely that it halts my breathing.
Why did she stop laughing? You must have scared her… again! Fuck!
We stare at each other when my lungs kick into gear and I inhale sharply, my chest heaving.
I tremble as the adrenaline hits me. Elena is going to end this—she is just being nice about it.
I move to press myself up, but her arms wrap around me, constricting me from any movement. I freeze and blink up at her.
Before I can say a word she lunges forward, capturing my lips with her own.
There is nothing tender about it. Her mouth searches mine in pure desperation as her hand moves up to cradle the back of my head.
It is a plea in the rawest sense of the word.
When I feel her mouth on mine, something inside me explodes.
I freeze for a second, but then I part my lips and she slides her tongue in. It caresses mine as if she is searching for answers, and I try to respond to each of her questions. All I want is to get closer to her, to feel her on me. To make up for time lost, and to make a promise for what’s to come.
Is she worth it? That little nagging voice in the back of my mind tries one more time, but I punch it square in the face. We are both scared, but we both want this. Need this, even.
I press Elena back against the couch and climb into her lap without breaking the kiss.
She lets out a sob in my mouth and digs her fingers into my hips, willing me to stay.
I finally break away from her mouth, but only to nip at her jaw and throat.
The guttural groan that Elena releases vibrates through my bones and instantly makes me wet.
I roll my hips against her and brush up the hem of her t-shirt, revealing her skin.
“Off.”
The word is nothing more than a growled command, but Elena does exactly as she is told.
I don’t wait until she’s done, but lower myself so that I can place open-mouthed kisses along her stomach.
I sink my teeth in right below her ribs.
She inhales sharply, pressing her body into me.
The sudden need to feel her, to have her in my arms, to hear her cry my name in pleasure becomes nearly overwhelming.
I raise my head to kiss her lips and she instantly pulls me closer.
Her hands come under my thighs and suddenly we move upward.
I gasp as she lifts me as easily as I would lift a carton of milk.
There is no hesitation in her strides when she takes us to the bedroom, and no doubt when she lays us down onto the bed.
Before I can pull her in for another kiss, her hand moves up to caress my face.
I blink. My cheeks are wet again, and the tears are still falling from my eyes.
When did that happen? But Elena doesn’t question it.
She just presses her lips to the salty droplets and kisses them away with such fervor that it makes my heart ache.
“Lo siento,” she whispers again.
Her apology rolls desperately from her tongue, her voice cracking on the words. I search for her eyes, but she averts her gaze. She bites her lip and her cheeks tinge slightly red. The sight breaks my heart and I start shaking my head.
“No, El, no apologies. No sorry. Only this, only us, only love.”
The moment the words leave my mouth, the world stops spinning. We both freeze, our movements stilled and our breaths trapped within our lungs. Then her eyes snap up to meet mine. Her pupils are blown—dark with so much more than just need and lust.
“Sí, only love,” she murmurs, and then she is on me again.
We find ourselves in a tangle of limbs as we try to discard our clothing, and somehow I end on my back with Elena’s thigh between my legs. Her eyes grow darker as she feels how wet I am for her, and I feel her body coil with this delicious tension.
“Maya,” she growls.
Elena moves her head toward my neck and places wet kisses against my pulse point.
The feeling alone is enough for me to drive up my hips and let out a shaky moan when my core collides with the muscles of her thigh.
My need for her courses through me like a throbbing pulse between my legs and I have to bite my lip not to ride her here and now.
This is about me showing her that I choose her too.
I cling to that thought and shift my weight before I completely melt under Elena’s hands.
I roll us over in one fluid motion until I am straddling her again and lean forward to pin her against the sheets.
Elena gasps, and for a brief moment her back lifts from the bed in defiance.
Her eyes are wide with surprise but all protest in her stills when I grind down on her, leaving her thigh wet with my arousal.
She lets out a deep shuddering sigh and surrenders.
I bring my lips to her ear and graze the lobe with my teeth. She shudders again.
“Let me,” I whisper with a husky voice.
I take her wrists and hold them above her head, pressing them down into the pillow.
If she wanted to, Elena could turn us in a heartbeat.
I wouldn’t be a match for her. But she doesn’t push back and keeps her hands in place even when I release her to roam my hands down her body.
She lets out soft little whimpers when my lips ghost over her chest, brushing her nipples and trailing down her stomach.
Her back arches into me when I drag my nails down her sides, making her skin erupt in goosebumps.
I slowly kiss my way down until I settle between her legs.
They fall open for me immediately. Elena glances down at me, desperation visible in her eyes, but I don’t touch her there.
Not yet. Instead I press a warm, open-mouthed kiss against her inner thigh.
“Maya,” Elena pleads breathily, and I hum, satisfied.
When I glance up I see that her hands are still above her head, but that they are now balled into tight fists.
As if she needs to restrain herself from moving.
A pleased smile tugs at my lips, and I lean forward again to press a soft, lingering kiss to her other thigh.
Elena wriggles underneath me. Her whimpers are now growing into high-pitched pleas for me to touch her, the smell of her arousal growing stronger.
The moment I press my tongue against her and slowly drag it up her dripping pussy, she bucks into me, unable to suppress her body.
Her hands fly down and hover above my head for a moment, only to fall down next to me and clench the sheets.
I chuckle and press my hands down on her hipbones while my mouth slowly explores her, circling around her clit.
“Please, Maya… por favor…”
Elena clenches her eyes shut and presses her head back into the pillow.
Her breathing grows more rapid by the second.
I smirk, recalling our very first time together.
It isn’t exactly payback since I take such great pleasure in this, but seeing how she responds to my teasing is almost as good as tasting her.
Almost. I trail my mouth closer to her core, feeling the heat pulse from her, and I can no longer hold myself back.
I slowly run my tongue over her entrance up to her clit, savoring every part of her.
Elena jolts and growls lowly. She arches so fiercely into me that her hips lift off the mattress.
This time I don’t press her down, but steady her with my hands while keeping a slow and deliberate pace.
I circle her clit again, without giving her the direct pressure she is craving.
Her need for it must be so all-consuming that it feels like sweet agony.
And when the release finally comes, I want her to shatter into a billion pieces right here in my arms. Elena shivers and bucks below me, her hips thrusting as her body begs me for more.
Her moans are loud and she lets out a stream of incoherent Spanish mixed with my name.
It’s the most beautiful music that I’ve ever heard.
When I push two fingers inside of her, her breathing becomes so ragged I know she can’t take much more.
Her body tightens and her muscles clench around me.
I finally flick my tongue over her rock-hard clit and her hands grasp the sheets even harder.
Her thighs shake against me as I push harder and faster, bringing her all the way to the edge.
I break away from her for a brief moment—only barely.
“I’ve got you, El,” I murmur, my words vibrating against her core. “Let go for me.”
She hears the words somewhere in her haze, and she lets out a high, guttural cry.
Her breathing shudders as her back arches off the bed again, and her climax crashes over her.
I feel the waves of it pulsing on my tongue, which I keep pressed against her while working her through it.
My name falls from her lips, hoarse and thick with need, as the last of her tremors subsides and she collapses beneath me.
Her ragged breath is the only sound that fills the room as I press my lips against her thigh.
She whimpers softly as I withdraw my fingers, but snuggles into me the moment I curl up against her side.
Her arm comes around my waist as she draws me in even closer, letting out a soft, satisfied sigh.
When her eyes finally flutter open, a tear rolls down her face, tracing a path on her slick skin.
Not one of pain or sadness, but one of relief.
Her lips find my temple in a soft kiss that says more than any words can, before she leans back into the pillow, happily floating in the aftermath.
For the first time in days the silence between us isn’t painful and empty, but laced with the promise of our second chance.