27. No Right To Judge
NO RIGHT TO JUDGE
“Hi,” Skye said the next day, holding her hand out for Sean’s girlfriend, Sara. “It’s nice to meet you.” She slid into the booth opposite them at the restaurant Sean had texted her.
“You too,” Sara said. “I have to say I was surprised to recently find out Sean even had a sister.”
She wouldn’t let that get to her. There was no reason to.
The slice into her heart wasn’t as deep or painful.
Sean had made his decision years ago, but the fact he was trying now meant something.
But she’d been right. It’d taken him weeks to get back to her on a date. When the text came in last week, she’d been stunned but wasn’t going to turn it down either.
If she had a chance to bridge that gap she’d lost with him over a decade ago, she owed it to herself to try.
After all, he was the one who noticed her first and approached her. He’d said he changed and she’d seen that because she’d had no intention of seeking him out when she returned. Being rejected again was something she could do without.
So she held onto that tiny sliver that he’d been stunned to see her and maybe he’d matured and wanted a little bit of their past brought back too.
This was the first step.
Ash had things to do and so did she. They weren’t connected at the hip and didn’t spend every night together. And she didn’t think bringing Ash into this first meeting with Sean was a good idea.
“I’m sure he told you it’s a long story.”
“He actually never said much at all,” Sara said. “I’m not from this area so I had no idea. I didn’t even know his parents died.”
“Huh?” she asked.
“It’s not something I’ve talked about much in my life, Skye,” Sean said. He didn’t look happy that Sara was bringing this up. “No one wants to remember that they were homeless.”
She sighed. This wasn’t getting off on the right foot at all.
“I’m sorry. I had no control over any of that and neither did you.”
Sara ran her hand down Sean’s arm. “I told him that too. I think he thought I’d be embarrassed or pity him. I don’t or didn’t. I think he made something of himself after what he went through.”
“It sounds it,” Skye said. Not that she knew much about his life. Nor did he know much about hers.
They hadn’t done much more than text a few times in the past few weeks.
“We all have to survive somehow,” Sean said. “Some just have to work harder than others. Some have to learn from their mistakes along the way. I have.”
“Don’t be that way,” Sara said. “He’s trying to act tough because he didn’t want to tell me about his past. I’m fine with it. I think it just makes him a stronger person.”
She found it sweet. She didn’t remember her brother ever being embarrassed about anything as a child.
Both of them were just trying to survive at the same time navigating some form of independence that was normal for a teen.
Maybe Sean rebelled more than her, but not more than other kids. Or so she thought because she didn’t know, having kept to herself most times.
“I’m glad he found you,” Skye said. “Or has you. Sean said you have a daughter?”
“Kailey. She’s with her father tonight. She’s fourteen and splits her time.”
Fourteen? That had to mean Sara was older than Sean. Unless she had a child in high school.
Anything was possible and not really her concern.
That thought shouldn’t have even jumped into her brain.
She had no right to judge anything.
“How long have you two been together?” It didn’t seem as if Sean wanted to talk much, so she’d try.
“Two years,” Sara said. “I moved to the area about three years ago for my ex’s job. But we split right after. I met Sean at work.”
“So you work together now?”
“No,” Sara said. “I changed jobs. We were at the same factory, Sean on the floor, me in the office, but I left for a better job.”
“I work a lot,” Sean said. “Don’t make shit hourly but get a lot of OT and pick up shifts.”
“He’s been working a lot lately,” Sara said. “Which is good with the holidays coming up. We don’t get to see each other as much, but it’s fine. I like knowing he’s home in bed with me at night, even if I’m sleeping when he comes in half the time.”
She smiled. “I’m glad you found that.”
“I noticed you’ve been writing a lot of articles,” Sara said. “I asked Sean what you did and he wasn’t really sure, other than that.”
“Yeah. It’s only part time. I wanted something to get me out of the house some. I’m a technical writer and work from home, so if I don’t have a reason to get out much, I might live in my sweats and only venture out for food every few weeks.”
There was no reason to go into more.
Not that she wanted to write a book. No details on her job.
Sean didn’t appear as if he cared since he didn’t ask much.
Their one conversation about their parents’ fire, he’d told her she was overthinking it.
The same as Ash and the Lancasters.
She didn’t know how many more times someone had to tell her that for her to believe it, but maybe she finally was. Not like she had much of a choice when all the facts pointed to the same things.
And the arsonist, he hadn’t gotten in touch with her like she’d thought he would.
But again, the fire last night. They knew who started it.
The teen confessed and he was going to have it on his record for life.
Because someone was bullying him and all he wanted to do was send a signal back.
To throw a bottle with a rag of fire into the bushes. Not even. Just the front lawn to burn a spot.
But adrenaline had him heaving it harder.
When he’d seen what he’d done, he’d gotten scared he’d be caught.
He’d even admitted he wanted to knock on their door and wake them up. Anything.
Fear had him running. Just like it looked on the neighbor’s video footage. Such a sad thing for everyone.
And Ash was right. She got her article. She posted it and then there were crickets.
From the anonymous person sending her emails. From her boyfriend who was pissed at her for even thinking it might be Alan. For her wanting to go home last night rather than stay with him.
After the tense conversation, it was for the best.
The same that she’d had plans tonight.
“I’d love a job like that,” Sara said. “Where I could be home in sweats all day.”
They placed their orders, then were silent for a few minutes. She really didn’t know why she was trying so hard.
Sara nudged Sean, he didn’t talk though.
She might as well try some more since she was here. “Sean was always quiet when we were younger. Both of us spent a lot of time in our rooms.” Sean didn’t say anything. “Oh, and I saw Dad’s friend Steve at one of the fires.”
“Steve Connor?” Sean asked.
“Yeah, why?”
“He’s at the bar. We saw him when we came in.”
“Really?”
“Yeah, he’s with his wife. I don’t remember her name, but I recognized him. He didn’t say anything to me.”
“Maybe he didn’t know who you were,” she said. She turned and could see the corner of the bar, the man was there, right next to his wife and it was as if they noticed her. Jill nudging Steve, him turning and coming over.
“Why did you do that?” Sean hissed.
“I just looked. They are only going to say hi.”
“Skye,” Steve said. “Jill, remember I told you that I saw Skye. Oh wow, Sean? I didn’t notice you at the bar, but I thought you looked familiar.”
“Yeah,” Sean said, his voice low. “That’s me.”
Sean didn’t even bother to introduce Sara, so she did. “This is Sara, Sean’s girlfriend.”
Sara smiled, shook their hand, then when the air felt tense, Jill said, “Why don’t we let them eat. Steve told me he has your email. I’d like to maybe catch up.”
“Sure,” she said. “Just reach out.”
“Don’t talk to them,” Sean said.
“Why?”
“Because Steve is someone to stay away from.”
She frowned. “I don’t remember that.”
Sean’s voice dropped some. Like maybe he was embarrassed to be doing the big brother act, but she found she liked it just the same. Even that tiny glimpse of it,
“You weren’t around as much as me back then when they were there. Just stay away. And I don’t want to talk about our childhood,” he said. “Ours were nothing alike. Not even living in the same house.”
Yes, Sean got it harder from their father, but she got it from their mother.
She sighed when she saw Sara nudge his foot again. It was obvious he was forced to come here and maybe he was regretting it.
That even her presence seemed to get his back up when he said he’d changed. And the visit from their parents’ friends probably hadn’t helped.
“You don’t know it all,” she said calmly. “And I don’t want to fight. We can put it behind us. I didn’t see everything that happened to you and you didn’t see everything that happened to me.”
“And I don’t want to know either,” Sean said, picking up his beer. His second one before their food came out.
He and Sara had drinks in front of them before she arrived, but Sara was still nursing her one beer.
“Be nice, Sean,” Sara said.
“I am. I’m being me.”
Sara smiled, but it was forced.
Skye just had to know at this point. It made little sense to her. “Can I ask why you wanted to have dinner? I’m not trying to be a bitch. I just thought maybe you wanted to get to know me more.”
Sean turned to look at Sara. Her brother’s girlfriend’s shoulders dropped.
“It was me who was pushing it. Sean never talks much about his past. And now that I know some, I just thought maybe it’d be good if you two could at least be civil.
He’s told me before how angry he was about life and isn’t now. Or I’ve never seen much of his anger.”
Skye frowned over that term. “I’ve never not been civil to you, have I?”
She didn’t want to be responsible for him losing control or feeling like he’d not put his past behind him. She knew what that was like more than anyone.
Sean held her stare. “No. I mean, we lived through the same hell, but I guess we got along, or in our way.”
“That’s right.” She held her hands up. “I’m not asking for a friendship. Or even to ignite some long-lost family bond.”
Sean snorted. “It’s not going to happen.”