Chapter 49
Forty-Nine
MARIS
Everything happens in slow motion and at lightspeed.
First, I’m about to get my throat ripped out and then Julian’s there, leaning over me like an adoring avenging angel.
I think I’m imagining him. Some figment of my brain on the brink of death, the last offering of dopamine to ease my leaving this world.
I start to cry. I didn’t mean to leave him.
Not after he made me promise.
I thought I’d keep that promise.
Forever.
But then he’s there again. I see him kill Ben. I know he killed the others. They’re gone. He did that. And now I’m here.
I don’t know where here is.
Pain, sharp and hot, radiates from my neck.
I’m standing, but I’m not holding myself up.
My back hits a wall and I open my eyes. The world isn’t so shaky anymore.
The drugs they gave me are wearing off, at least I think they are.
The inky black sea is in front of me. I stare at the water, the moonlight shining off the sea changes and swirls.
It feels upside down, like someone poured the sky right into the sea.
It’s so achingly beautiful. I don't want to look anywhere else but at it. The waves rise and fall, the stars shine and blend with the sky. Water. Sky. It’s all the same when you look for long enough.
But it’s not just the stars I see.
I see a woman. She’s there, in the waves. Pale skin, luminescent, dark hair that vanishes into the sea when she turns her head.
Is it in my head? Is she in my head?
There’s a mist that blows in from the water and wets my face. No. It’s real. I’m here. She’s here. The clouds have parted and it’s not raining anymore.
I open my mouth to call to her but there’s a hand over my throat.
Julian.
The moon breaks through the clouds and the woman is gone.
There’s only Julian. It shines down on him.
I don’t look at the sea anymore. I don’t want to.
I called him an angel before. I still mean it.
If he’s not an angel, I don’t ever want to see one.
Leave me with this devil. He’s mine. His head is bent and I understand why my neck aches.
He’s feeding on me. I push at his shoulders for him to let me go but he just holds me closer.
The hand covering my mouth turns my head away from him and gives him better access to my throat.
It hurts more. Like he’s tearing a chunk of my neck out.
I kick my feet, trying to get away. It doesn’t work, all I do is end up scuffing my boots when I slam my heels against the wall.
It didn’t hurt this bad before, or did it? Was I just so out of my mind on orgasms that I didn’t realize?
The pain sharpens into a single point. Like a knife being driven into the side of my neck. The blade sinks deeper, it turns, my throat shreds from it. I scream against Julian’s palm but he doesn’t let up and he doesn’t let me go.
It’s when I think I’m going to pass out that he finally raises his head and stops feeding.
I have to look up at him when he forces my head back against the wall behind me.
We’re on the dock on the waterside of a repair building.
Beneath us the water laps against the pilings.
The sound is relaxing, should be at least but right now it just forces my anxiety higher.
Every second Julian doesn’t speak scares me.
He moves in front of me and glares down at me.
“What were you thinking?” I raise my hand to shove his away from my mouth but he doesn’t let me. He keeps his hand there and forces my head back. “No talking. I’m not letting you talk your way out of this. You almost got yourself killed. If I hadn’t come in time you’d be dead, wife.”
Wife.
Tears prick my eyes when he calls me that. I didn’t think I’d ever hear him call me that again. He’s right. Of course, he’s fucking right but I had to do something. I couldn’t just stay inside the house while the world fell down around me and he was gone.
Anger burns in me.
He was gone.
“You left me!” I scream at him but the sound is muffled, smothered by his palm.
It doesn’t stop me from yelling at him. I scream at him while I slap at his chest and glare back.
If he thinks I’m going to let him control me just because he’s stronger than me he’s got another thing coming.
He saved me and that makes me his fucking problem now.
I slam my hands against his chest again, I slap him.
How dare he fucking leave me?
“You fucker!” I slap him again, screams still swallowed up by his hand, and this time my nails scratch the side of his face.
I stare at his face while Julian stands immovable as ever with his fucking hand on my mouth.
I watch the blood from the scratch bead on his cheek before the cut is gone, and I fucking lose it.
He left me here. Alone. Defenseless. Fucking scared out of my mind with a town full of vampires and no clue of what to do. How dare he?
I kick, bite and punch him. I bite the hand covering my mouth but it doesn’t move. Julian doesn’t move. He takes it all from me and then he gives me everything right back.
He shoves me back against the wall. “You think your life is yours to play with? That you can get yourself killed?” He bites the side of my neck again.
It doesn’t hurt this time. It feels good.
So fucking good I moan when he breaks the skin.
He doesn’t feed. It’s a bite to mark me. He turns my head to look at him.
“I say when you die, Maris. Me.” I glare at him, at the angry angel in front of me. My demon. My blood is smeared on his lips and chin now. I want to kiss him so badly. I arch towards him but Julian shoves me back with a hand to my chest and shoves a knee between my legs. “Ride it,” he commands.
Without meaning to, I do exactly what he says.
My body moves, hips rolling forward and sliding back.
I whimper against his hand when he presses his knee up into me.
The pressure is exactly what I need. I try to go faster but the hand on my chest forces me back.
He doesn’t let me move as fast as I want.
It’s torture but I don’t stop moving. I keep rocking, sliding up and back on Julian’s knee.
I squeeze my thighs, chasing the weight of his knee between my legs.
Julian kisses the side of my neck. “That’s it. Let me see you. My needy wife.”
I grab onto his shoulders and tilt my hips.
I lock my legs around his thigh and pull him in as close as I can manage.
Only then do I start moving faster. Hands on his shoulders for leverage and Julian’s big body to ride.
I feel his hand at my hip, fingers brushing against my overheated skin before he slides two fingers inside my jeans.
I don’t stop moving. I grab his arm and direct his hand between my thighs.
When his fingers brush against my clit, I almost sob.
I hold his hand and fuck myself on his finger and Julian lets me do it.
If he didn’t want me to he could easily break my hold but he stays there, pressed close to me and whispering in my ear.
“You belong to me,” he tells me and presses his fingers hard to my clit.
The pressure pushes me over the edge and I cum harder than I have before.
I gasp for air, mouth parted against Julian’s palm, while he kisses my neck, my face.
Every kiss sends a jolt of pleasure through my body.
When he takes his hand away, I suck in a lungful of air.
The air burns my lungs and I cough while Julian moves back an inch from me.
I reach for him to bring him back but I don’t need to. Julian comes back on his own. He unzipped his jeans and pulled his dick out. I know what comes next.
“God, yes, please. Please,” I beg him and offer my hips to him when he shoves my pants down to my knees.
“Maris,” he kisses me. His cock slides against my thigh, between my legs. Fuck. I need him so bad. I raise myself up my tiptoes to try and take him inside of me but Julian stops me with a hand at my throat.
He pushes me back against the wooden wall and loops an arm around my waist to keep me close to him. For a second he doesn’t speak. I watch him look me over. His gaze is slow and deliberate. Over my cheeks, my nose, my lips and eyes. So heavy I can feel it as surely as his touch.
“You belong to me,” he says again.
“Yes.”
“Show me.”
When Julian grabs my hips and turns me to face the wall, I barely have time to put my hands out to catch myself. I don’t need to do it with the way he’s holding me but I do it anyway.
“Are you going to risk your life again?” The blunt head of his cock nudges against my aching pussy and I arch my back, presenting myself to him.
“No,” I sob.
“Who does your life belong to?”
“You.”
“That’s right, wife. You’re fucking mine. All of you. Your life, your pussy, your soul. It all belongs to me. Say it.”
“Julian,” I whimper and reach back to grab his hip. “I’m yours.” I try to bring him closer. “Fuck me. Fuck me. I need you inside of me. Please. I’m yours. I’m sorry.”
Julian eases inside of me when I say I’m sorry. It’s a tease. Just an inch of him before he’s gone and I cry tears of frustration.
“I-I belong to you. My pussy is yours. My life is yours. I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I won’t do it again. I promise. I love you.”
Julian thrusts inside of me so hard my words get stuck in my throat.
I try to tell him I love him again but I can’t.
It feels too good. Julian doesn’t take his time with me.
He fucks me properly with a punishing pace that I know is meant to do exactly that.
I don’t even try to move with him. I let him hold me up, pliant in his arms while he fucks me the way he wants.
The steady slap of him against my ass mingles with our moans and the sound of the sea.
His hands bruise my skin and I welcome the ache.
I relish the thought of having his fingerprints on me to see the next day.
He leans close and kisses me. I feel his fangs against my lip. They cut me. Blood fills my mouth and Julian licks it away.
“I love you, Maris.”
“Julian.”
My body spasms and Julian holds me up through it with an arm across my chest and a hand on my hip. He fucks me while I cum and spasm on his dick. Julian jerks and moans in my ear when he comes, he grinds his hips against my ass and holds me tight while he fills my pussy up.
I reach a hand back to card through his hair. My heart is still racing. I tug on his head and bring him down to my mouth. “I love you,” I tell him again and kiss him.