Chapter 13
CHAPTER
THIRTEEN
Sawyer
I stare up into King’s deep brown eyes that are locked on mine. Our lips are merely inches apart, both of us breathing as one.
He reaches down, brushing a piece of my hair behind my ear, and as he goes to pull his hand away, I place mine on top of his, holding it in place, cradling my cheek.
“Fuck, you’re beautiful,” he says, his voice rough, and I feel it against my lips.
“Damien.” I sigh, letting my eyes fall closed, waiting for him to kiss me.
But he doesn’t.
Instead, I feel a sharp jab in the side of my ribs, and my eyes shoot open to look up at a pair of brown eyes nearly identical to King’s.
Fuck me, I was dreaming about him.
I blink my eyes a few times, trying to rid myself of sleep and whatever the hell that dream was. It takes me about two seconds to realize I’m on King’s couch and remember that I definitely am not supposed to be.
I was meant to go home last night, but I must have fallen asleep before he got home, and he didn’t want to wake me.
“Morning,” Ellie says, reminding me that she’s still standing above me.
“Did you have to jab me that hard to wake me?” I ask her, sitting up and bringing my hand to my rib where it still stings.
“Well, my dad should be up any minute, and I didn’t think you would want him to hear you sighing his name in your sleep.” She smirks at me.
Fucking fantastic.
“You want to pretend you didn’t hear that either?” I smile at her pleadingly.
“As disgusting as it is, your secret’s safe with me.” She rolls her eyes. “Don’t leave without saying goodbye,” she calls out as she walks into the kitchen.
I rub my hands over my face, trying to rid myself of the sleepiness before looking for my phone. After a minute or two of digging through the couch, I find it sitting on the side table next to the couch, plugged into a charger.
I know that I definitely didn’t fall asleep with it like that, so King must have plugged it in for me when he got home. I’ve come to realize that the more I get to know King, the more I realize how thoughtful he is. Not in an outward way where he’s looking for attention from it. In fact, it feels like quite the opposite.
He’s thoughtful when nobody’s looking. When he knows he won’t get recognition for it. He does little things because he genuinely cares, and he’s been doing little things for me more and more these days.
It makes me wonder if he cares because I’m his employee. Or maybe kind of his friend. Or someone who can watch his kids for him. Or maybe… it’s more.
I don’t even know if I want it to be more.
I mean, that’s a lie. I think I do want it to be more. I’m just not sure it’s the best idea. It’s been a long time since I’ve actually had feelings for anyone, and truthfully, King’s the last person I thought I’d be having feelings for.
I thought I hated him from the second I met him. He seemed cold and cocky and frustrating, but he’s actually none of those things. He’s the complete opposite of that. I can admit I judged him quicker than I should’ve. Granted, that night wasn’t one of my finest. Plus, he definitely judged me quicker than he should’ve too.
But it feels like we’re past all that. It feels like we’re in this weird in-between where we’re not quite friends but not enemies either. We’re just existing around each other, and the more time we spend together, the more this undeniable pull between us grows.
As hard as both of us try to ignore it.
It’s unlike anything I’ve felt with a person before. I had boyfriends in high school, but they were never serious. Between school, work, taking care of my mom, and avoiding my brother, there wasn’t time for anything more than casual hookups.
Sure, there were a few that I genuinely liked, but never any that I liked enough to consider putting in the actual effort to make it work with.
But sometimes I think about that with King, and it goes against everything I’ve ever told myself.
I finally have a good job that I like. I like the people I work with enough to maybe call them real friends one day. My life doesn’t suck for the first time in as long as I can remember.
Yet here I am, thinking of blowing it all up for him. My boss.
My boss, who has a family, kids .
It could never be serious with him. I could never take on such a huge role in his children’s lives like that. I’m not cut out for it, look at my own mother. I know the whole fantasy in my head isn’t practical.
But then why can’t I seem to let it go?
I sigh, unlocking my phone and calling Aria. The phone rings twice before she answers.
“Please tell me you fucked him and that’s why you didn’t come home last night,” she says in greeting.
“I fell asleep on his couch.” I laugh under my breath.
“Well, that’s boring.” She sighs into the phone. “He texted me as much from your phone, but I was still hoping for more.”
“So sorry to disappoint,” I say. “Are you home? I should be back in a little bit. I’m sorry, I still have your car.”
“No, I’m actually pulling up to a shoot now, and don’t worry, I got a ride. I probably won’t be home until late tonight depending on how it goes.” She pauses. “Maybe you should hang out with boss man today,” she says, and I can hear the smile in her voice.
“Mm-hmm,” I mumble, ignoring her. “Good luck with your shoot. Call me after. Love you.”
“I will.” She sighs, defeated. “Love you, S.”
I hang up the phone right as I see King walk into the hallway toward the family room.
He doesn’t look at me right away, and I take the moment to watch him.
He rubs his hands over his tired eyes, looking like he just rolled out of bed. His hair is messy like he was tossing and turning over his pillow all night.
He’s wearing a black T-shirt, his full tattoo sleeves on display, and gray sweatpants. My eyes roam over his body, shamelessly checking him out. The way the thin material hugs his thick thighs, and you can see the slight outline of his…
King clears his throat, and my eyes shoot up to see him watching me. He raises a brow at me, like he is completely aware of the way I was just ogling him.
I feel a slight blush crawl over my cheeks, but I don’t look away. Instead, I shrug, not denying it. “Gray sweatpants look good on everyone, don’t flatter yourself.”
What I don’t say is that they’ve never looked better than they do on him.
His eyes darken for just a moment, and there it is, that pull between us. But it’s gone just as quickly as it came, and he stands up straighter, as if it’ll rid himself of whatever he was just feeling.
I know because I’ve done the same things more times than I can count at this point.
“Sorry, I got back so late.” He clears his throat. “You were sleeping, and I felt bad waking you. I hope that was okay.”
“Yeah, of course. Sorry for falling asleep before you got back, but thanks for not waking me.” I tell him. “And for texting Aria and plugging my phone in.”
“No problem.” He shrugs, rocking back and forth on his feet. “So, do you want some breakfast?”
“Free food?” I stand from the couch. “Absolutely.” I look over to see the hint of a smile poking at his lips.
I follow him to the kitchen, where I find Ellie sitting at the counter, playing on her phone. Willow comes skipping into the kitchen a few minutes later, and King starts cooking what is basically a feast compared to my normal cereal for breakfast.
You’d think it would be weird. Me, him, and his daughters, all sitting around the breakfast counter while he cooks. It seems so normal for them, and then here I am. The outsider of their family.
It should feel like I’m intruding, and yet, I don’t. I feel more welcome and safer than I ever have. I feel…normal.
After about an hour of eating breakfast and listening to Willow talk about too many topics to keep up with, I help King clean the dishes before going to grab my bag from the other room.
“Where are you going?” Willow asks, walking into the room as I’m shoving my charger into my bag.
“I’m gonna head home now that your dad’s back.” I smile at her.
“No, you can’t.” She shakes her head. “Dad promised we could go strawberry picking today, so you have to come too.”
“Well, that sounds like a ton of fun, but I don’t know if?—”
“Dad!” Willow yells, cutting me off.
“What’s going on?” King quickly walks into the room, looking concerned.
“Sawyer’s coming strawberry picking with us,” she tells him decisively.
“Oh.” His shoulders relax. “Okay.” He looks at me. “Yeah, sure.”
“I don’t want to intrude on your family day,” I say. “Plus, I already didn’t work yesterday. I’m sure Gabe and Trix are getting tired of covering the desk between appointments.”
“You’re not intruding, you’re invited,” he says genuinely. “And I’m sure they’re fine for one more day. I say so, and I’m your boss, remember?”
Sure do.
“Okay, I’ll go,” I concede, knowing I’m not getting out of this.
Knowing I don’t want to get out of it.
“Well, I should probably change.” I look down at my sweatpants and tank top.
“Come with me.” Willow grabs my bag from my hands. “You can help me pick out my outfit too.” She turns around, her hair flipping over her shoulder as she walks away with my bag.
I look over to see King watching her, a small smile on his face before his eyes meet mine again. I hold his gaze for only a second before pulling away and following Willow to her room.
I sit on Willow’s bed, watching her practically destroy her closet to find a single pair of jeans. The messiness is not unlike what my closet looks like, except with a lot less clothes.
Once I assure her that her outfit is adorable and she’s ready to go, I sneak out of her room and go to the bathroom in the hallway that she and Ellie share.
Thankfully, I managed to throw an extra outfit in my bag, so I have clothes to wear. Turns out my overpacking will come in handy after all.
I quickly get ready, slapping some light makeup on my face and brushing through my natural waves. I throw on a pair of low-rise flare jeans and a high neck white cropped T-shirt. I put everything else back in my bag, slip my white Converse on, and go put my larger bag in Aria’s car, just bringing my small purse with me.
When I walk back inside, Ellie is sliding her sneakers on while Willow stands over her impatiently waiting, and King is grabbing his keys off the side table.
“Can we go now?” Willow asks. “I’ve been waiting.”
“You’ve been ready for like five minutes. Chill.” Ellie rolls her eyes, standing from the ground. “I’m ready. Can I drive?”
“When did you get your driver’s permit without me knowing?” King raises an amused brow at her.
“Come on, I’ll have it in like a month when I turn fifteen,” she says.
“Then you can drive in like a month.” He shrugs. “Let’s go.”
Ellie sighs as Willow practically runs out the door. King holds his hand out for me to go ahead before closing the door and locking up behind me.
“Sawyer, you can have the front seat, but I still get to control the music,” Ellie calls out, opening the back door of the car.
“Sounds like a fair deal to me.” I smirk at her, walking over to the passenger side and sliding into King’s car.
He gets into the driver’s seat, turning on the car, and Ellie reaches over the front console, tapping on the screen to connect her phone.
Once she sits back and buckles in, King starts the drive. I look out the window, watching Seattle pass me by. It still hasn’t been that long since I’ve been here, and I definitely haven’t been able to explore as much as I’ve wanted to. It’s nice to look at it all, even just driving by.
I feel King’s eyes burning on me every few minutes or so, but I don’t move my gaze from the window. My skin feels like it’s on fire, knowing his gaze is on me.
We eventually drive past a sign that says “Benders Farm” and turn into the parking lot.
Only then, when he’s parking the car, do I chance a glance over at him. I take a single moment to admire the harsh lines of his jaw as he looks in front of him, the way he grips the steering wheel and his arm flexes against the pressure.
I hate how my heart pounds against my chest as I watch him.
My fingers twitch in my lap as I force myself to look away. Except my eyes catch Ellie’s staring at me through the rearview mirror, and I know I’ve been caught. For the second time now.
Thankfully, Ellie doesn’t seem like the type to ask because it would be pretty hard to deny that I clearly am feeling something for her dad at this point. I expect more skepticism, especially from her, but there’s none. Just a small, knowing smile on her face before she looks away from me.
King puts the car in park, and Willow immediately unbuckles, jumping out, and Ellie follows. I follow them, opening the passenger door and climbing out.
The four of us make our way up to the front, where me, Ellie, and Willow each get a bucket and scissors to use to cut the strawberries off the stems with. King doesn’t get one and says he’ll just share with the girls.
I barely have my own bucket in my hand before Willow grabs my free hand, pulling me toward the fields with her. Ellie and King walk a little behind us while me and Willow walk up and down the rows of strawberries. We take our time, walking through the multiple fields, and I help her inspect them all, picking the good ones to split between the two of us.
It feels weirdly normal spending the day and picking strawberries with them. I thought I’d feel like the odd one out, but I don’t. I feel more included in their family than ever.
Our buckets are practically halfway full by the time King and Ellie catch up with us. Her bucket has a few less strawberries than ours. I notice she has an AirPod in one of her ears, which isn’t surprising, and she looks more bored than excited by this.
“I’m thirsty.” Willow sighs, turning toward her dad. “Can I go get frozen lemonade?” she asks.
“I’ll go with her,” Ellie pipes in, seeming anxious to do something other than walk through endless fields.
“Come right back after, okay?” King reaches into his pocket, handing Ellie a twenty-dollar bill.
“Yup.” She snatches the bill from his hand, turning to follow Willow, who’s already skipping toward the food stands in the front of the fields.
King watches them walk away for a minute before turning away, nodding for the two of us to keep walking. “Thanks for coming today,” he says, his voice raspy from not speaking. “The girls like having you around.”
“They’re good kids.” I nod. “I like hanging with them too,” I tell him genuinely.
The two of us fall into a comfortable silence as we continue walking down the row. I occasionally stop to pick a strawberry, and he waits patiently as I do.
“You’re gonna have more strawberries than you can eat,” he says once he notices my basket is almost full.
“Oh, I don’t even like strawberries.” I laugh. “I was just picking these for Willow.”
He doesn’t respond, and I turn around to see he’s stopped right behind me, watching me with a look I don’t recognize.
“What?” I ask, looking up at him.
“It’s not just the girls who like having you around,” he says.
I feel my heart skip a beat inside my chest. I knew I felt it. Now I know he does too.
Suddenly, the way we’re both feeling is all that matters to me.
Suddenly, I don’t want to think about the consequences of my actions. I just want to be careless.
“Oh yeah?” I take a step toward him so we’re just inches apart. “Who else likes having me around?”
I watch his Adam’s apple bob against his throat.
“Say it,” I dare him.
If he can say the words, if he can throw caution to the wind, then so can I.
“ I like having you around, Sawyer,” he says, his voice so deep I feel it in my bones. “More than I should.”
I lift my free hand to his chest, feeling his heart pound beneath it. His eyes darken, and I know in this moment that I’ll let him kiss me if he tries. I want him to kiss me.
“We got you guys lemonade too.” The two of us jerk apart at the sound of Ellie’s voice.
And just like that, the moment is gone.
“Thanks El.” King clears his throat. He runs a hand through his hair, looking more caught off guard than I’ve ever seen him.
Can’t say that I feel much different.
“What were you guys doing?” Willow asks, her eyebrows pulled together.
“Your dad thought he had something in his eye,” I quickly say. “I was just checking for him.” I rock back and forth on my feet anxiously.
Ellie laughs under her breath, clearly not believing us, but Willow seems none the wiser.
“Oh, okay.” She shrugs, handing me my lemonade. “Come on, you have to help me fill my bucket too now.” She nudges me.
After one last look back at King, I follow her with a million thoughts scrambling through my head.
I almost kissed Damien King.
It would’ve been a mistake. Or would it?
It doesn’t matter, the moment will never happen again. It shouldn’t happen again.
And yet… I desperately want it to.