Chapter 23
CHAPTER
TWENTY-THREE
King
Today may have been a shit show, but I don’t think I’d trade this ending for anything.
When Jillian showed up, it felt like my world stopped for a second, and not in a good way.
I think part of me truly believed that when she left, I’d never see her again. So when I opened the front door and saw her standing there, to have my girls see her, for her to then leave again …
It’s been a long day, to say the least.
After she left, I found Willow in her room, my mom just sitting with her, calmly talking to her. Once I walked in, my mom quietly got up and I took her place, sitting on the bed next to her.
We talked about what happened, and truly, she seemed angrier than upset about the whole interaction, which I expected from Willow. Although she’s asked about her mom before and I know she’s curious about her absence, she never had the same connection to Jillian that Ellie did. She didn’t feel the loss like she did.
I think Jillian showing up here and acting the way she did just cemented to Willow that she doesn’t need nor want her in her life.
The first thing she asked as I sat down next to her was if she was gone, and when I told her yes, she said it was a good thing. I asked if she was sad about it, told her it was okay to be, and told her that her mom does love her even if she doesn’t show it well.
Willow said she doesn’t care. She didn’t want Jillian to be her mom because she was a complete stranger to her. Then she looked up at me with her big hazel eyes and asked if Sawyer could be her mom instead.
I didn’t know what to say to that, so I just told her that I hoped so.
The truth is, I want that too. I even think Sawyer wants it, but she doesn’t know how to admit it or accept it herself. But tonight, she bought Ellie this huge present for her birthday, and that meant everything. It’s not about the money she spent, but that it’s exactly what my daughter wanted. And Sawyer knew that because she cares so fucking much.
She loves them like I love them. And that means everything to me.
She means everything to me.
“I’m sorry about earlier with Jillian showing up,” I say to her.
“Why are you sorry?” She scrunches her brows together.
“I mean, I don’t know. I’m assuming that having my ex-wife show up on my doorstep wasn’t the most comfortable of situations for you either,” I say. “She didn’t exactly have the nicest things to say to you.”
“I’ve had people say much worse to me in my life. Jillian’s petty comments out of jealousy don’t bug me. At the end of the day, I’m the one you’re with, not her.” She shrugs. “But yeah, I am happy that she’s gone.”
“So am I.” I nod.
“So,” she drawls. “Ellie and I overheard your conversation with her earlier,” she says, raising a brow at me.
“Yeah?” I ask. “How much did you hear?”
“Everything,” she says.
“Everything,” I repeat. “So, you heard…” The words trail off.
“That I’m the love of your life?” she asks. “Yeah, I heard, but then I already knew that.” She smiles.
“Oh, did you?” I can’t help the smirk that tugs at my lips.
“Yeah, I did,” she teases me.
“And what about you?” I ask. “How do you feel?”
“You know, I don’t think I actually knew what being in love with someone even meant as of a few months ago.” She hesitates. “I knew how to have love for people, but this crazy, overwhelming feeling of being totally in love with someone…I didn’t even know it was real until I met you.” She looks up at me. “But it is. I’m completely fucking in love with you, Damien King.”
“And I’m completely in love with you, Sawyer Davis,” I say, pulling her into me and pressing my lips to hers.
Our kiss is full of all the love we’ve just confessed to each other. And when we pull away, her forehead rests against mine, the two of us still so close together.
I blink my eyes open, her eyelashes slightly brush against my own, and I feel her small smile against my lips.
“Butterfly kisses,” she whispers. “I love you.” She presses another small kiss to my lips.
“I love you too,” I say as she pulls away.
“You know, I realized something else today too,” she says, leaning back into the couch but keeping her head turned toward me.
“What is it?” I ask.
“Well, when I took Ellie to the smash room, at first, we didn’t talk. Just smashed shit and yelled and got it all out, you know?” She pauses. “But then after that, we did talk, and I realized that we kind of have some of the same fears.”
“Yeah? Like what?”
“Like becoming our mothers,” she says, a sad smile on her face. “But as we were talking everything out, and I was telling her all the reasons that she wouldn’t, I realized I was also talking to myself. Then she…” She pauses.
“Then she said that she thinks I’d make a pretty great mom. It’s funny because Willow said something similar the day that I picked her up from school.” She laughs under her breath, almost like she still can’t believe the words she’s saying.
“That doesn’t surprise me.” I shake my head.
“Yeah, well, it surprised me.” She laughs lightly. “Then I started to wonder why, when everyone keeps telling me this, am I so against believing it? And I think it’s because I had this idea in my head of what the perfect mom looked like. The mom that your daughters deserve, and I kept asking myself how could I ever be her ?” She hesitates. “But now, I don’t think I have to be. I think maybe I can just love them and show up for them, and maybe that might be enough.”
“It’s more than enough, Sawyer.” I hold her hand in mine. “Being a parent isn’t about being the best at everything. Fuck, I know I’m nowhere near a perfect parent half the time. We’re human, and we make mistakes. They make mistakes. I think you just have to promise to love them through it all.”
“I can do that.” She nods.
“Yeah?” I ask, hope evident in my voice.
“Yeah,” she says. “I want this, Damien. Not just you, but them. This family. I want to be a part of it.” She looks up at me with a genuine smile on her face.
“You already are, Sawyer,” I tell her.
A wide smile spreads across her face, and she lays her head on my shoulder.
“Stay the night?” I ask.
“I’d like that.” She nods.
We lay there for a while, the TV playing softly in the background but neither of us paying attention. We both just enjoy each other’s company, not needing anything else.
After a while, the two of us get up, and Sawyer comes with me to say good night to the girls. She’s never spent the night before, but neither of them even questions her still being here. It’s like accepting her into our family—into our lives—has been the most natural thing in the world.
After making sure they’re both good and locking up the house, Sawyer follows me to my room. I close the door behind me, and she laughs to herself as she looks at the bed.
“What?” I ask her.
“I’m just thinking about the last time I spent the night in your bed.” She turns to me. “I was so determined I wasn’t going to fall for you, even though I think I already was.”
“Yeah, well, so was I, if it helps.” I shrug, locking the door behind me.
“Locking the door, huh?” She raises a brow at me. “Are you trying to have your way with me, Damien King?”
“Always.” I pull her into me, kissing her deeply.
Her lips mold against my own, soft but firm, our tongues dancing against each other’s. I reach down, gripping under her thighs and lifting her, and she wraps her legs around my waist. I walk us toward the bed, gently setting her down and climbing on top of her.
We kiss each other slowly, like we have all the time in the world. Like nothing could ruin us or this moment. She reaches up, tugging at my shirt, and I pull it over my head and throw it to the side. I reach down, lifting her own shirt over her head, and she doesn’t hesitate to lift her arms to help me.
She’s not wearing a bra underneath, leaving her bare for me. I watch the way her chest moves up and down with her quickened breaths, her nipples hardening under my stare.
I lean down, sucking her pink nipple between my lips. She gasps, her back arching into me and her fingers lacing through my hair. I gently tug the sensitive bud between my teeth, then soothe it with my tongue. I repeat the motion again, her hips jerking under me, then move to the other side, giving it the same attention.
I kiss my way down her stomach, stopping at the waistband of her jeans. I reach up, unbuttoning them, and she raises her hips to help me slide them, along with her underwear, down her legs. I lift her leg in my hand, gliding my tongue up the inside of her calf, then her thigh, and then stopping when I reach her center.
“We have to be quiet.”
“I know,” she says, her voice nearly shaking with desire.
I don’t waste another second, sucking her clit into my mouth, my eyes looking up, and locking on her as I do. I watch as she bites her lip harshly into her mouth to stifle her moans.
I circle my tongue around her clit, her hips desperately grinding into me before I suck it between my lips again.
I lick down through her folds, spearing my tongue inside of her. I have to force my own groans down as her taste hits my tongue. “So damn sweet,” I whisper against her.
Shivers rack through her body, and I dive back in, drinking her up like I’m dying of thirst and she’s the only thing that can quench it. I explore every inch of her with my tongue, building her up until I can feel that she’s on the edge of exploding.
Then I grip on to her hips and flip us over so that I’m on my back and she sits on top of my face. She doesn’t hesitate to start riding my tongue, taking her own pleasure from me.
I reach up, pinching her nipple between my fingers, and a moan slips from her lips. I lift my other hand, covering her mouth to muffle the sounds. She grinds her pussy against me, and not seconds later, she throws her head back in pleasure as she comes all over my tongue.
She rides it out for a second, then lifts herself up, sliding down my body so her hips are hovering over mine. She presses her lips to mine, groaning at her own taste as her tongue swipes against mine. She reaches down, unbuttoning my jeans, and I help her yank them and my boxers off.
She climbs back onto me, lining herself up with me and sinking down onto my already rock-hard cock. I groan quietly as I fill her completely.
She stays there for a second, adjusting, before she starts to move. She grinds herself in a circular motion on my cock, her clit rubbing against my lower stomach with every roll of her hips.
I reach my hands around, gripping her ass in my hands and squeezing. She starts to pick up her pace, bouncing up and down, and I admire the way her body moves on top of me.
The way her tits bounce on her chest. The way her long copper hair flies around her as she throws her head back in pleasure. The way her cheeks and chest are flushed pink, her green eyes dazed with desire.
“Fuck, you’re so beautiful,” I say. “Make yourself come for me, sweetheart. Let me watch you.”
She bounces her hips faster, leaning forward and slamming her lips to mine to drown out the moan that falls from her lips as she comes. She squeezes my cock tightly, her nails digging into my shoulder as she soaks me.
I flip her over so that I’m on top, thrusting into her at the same fast rhythm as I kiss her. I reach down, rubbing quick circles over her clit, and she lifts her hips into me, pulling me even deeper. I keep going, not letting up, until I can feel her clenching around me again, and I know she’s on the verge of another orgasm.
“Don’t stop,” she whimpers into the kiss.
“One more, Sawyer.” I keep going. “Let me feel that pretty pussy come all over me one more time.”
She cries out softly, and I slam my lips back into hers to swallow the sound as she explodes around me. My hips jerk into her as I follow right behind.
I pull out as we each catch our breath. I stand, walking to my bathroom to grab a towel to clean her off, and throwing it in the hamper when I’m done.
Then I crawl back into bed next to her, pulling her in close so her head rests on my chest.
Her eyes flutter closed, the exhaustion of the day hitting us both.
“Hey, Damien?” she mumbles.
“Yeah, sweetheart?” I ask.
“I love you,” she says, and I can hear the smile in her voice.
“I love you too, Sawyer.” I lean down, pressing a kiss to the top of her head.
I reach over, turning off the light, and lie back, still holding her into me.
The last time a woman slept in this bed with me was Jillian, and at that point, our nights looked a lot different than this.
They definitely never felt like this.
Having Sawyer here with me, being able to hold her, it’s the most comfort I’ve felt in a long time. It feels like it was always meant to be this way.
I drift off, hoping that I can fall asleep like this with her for the rest of my life, and in that moment, I promise myself that I will.
Because she’s part of this family now, and I’m never letting her go.