19. Blue
19
Blue
A n hour later, I climb into the passenger seat of the SUV and wave to my sister who is watching from the window of her room as we drive out of the lot. The necklace glints in the sun but I’m not sure she recognized it as being Mom’s.
“Thanks for getting the cupcakes,” I say, watching straight ahead once she’s out of sight. “That was actually nice.”
He nods, his eyebrows furrowed, his attention on merging with traffic.
“She was going to go to medical school. She’d been accepted.” I’m looking straight ahead but see him glance at me from the corner of my eye. “God. I hate this so much,” I say, pressing the heels of my hands into my eyes to stop myself from crying.
“Why didn’t you tell the police it was your father?”
“I was afraid he’d hurt her worse.”
“Not if he was in jail.”
“I couldn’t be sure he would be.” I turn to him. “I was sixteen at the time and my big sister suddenly wasn’t the sister I knew. Mom was gone. I thought they’d separate us. Take me away from her since I was a minor. God knows where they’d put Wren.”
“Is she afraid of all men or is it just me?”
I study him. He almost sounds like he cares but I know he doesn’t.
He raises his eyebrows, waiting for my response.
“I’m going to tell you something that may be new to you, Zeke,” I say, putting a hand on his arm. I’m not sure who is more surprised, him or me, but I pull it away quickly. “And I realize this may come as a shock to you, but you don’t exactly give off the warm fuzzies.”
He gives me a withering sideways glance.
I put my feet up on the seat and hug my knees. “But yeah, pretty much all men with the exception of Rudy.”
“Take your shoes off if you’re going to put your feet on the leather.”
I raise my eyebrows and look at him. I cock my head. “Worried I’ll dirty your car?” I ask, not moving my feet. Digging them in. “Does it bother you?”
He looks at me. “It’s a nice car.” With one quick motion, he knocks my feet off the seat.
“Fine. Anal much?”
“Yeah, actually.” We fall into silence. “Your mother, what happened to her? She left?”
“She would never have left us. Never.”
He glances at me momentarily. “Your father hurt her?”
I turn to look out the side window and shrug my shoulders. “Don’t know. All I know is she wouldn’t have left us.”
We drive for ten more minutes in silence.
“Why are you helping me?” I ask.
“How am I helping you?”
“This. Today. Bringing me to my sister. The cupcakes. The gifts?—”
“You didn’t give me a choice on the gifts.”
“You didn’t have to do any of it. You could literally lock me up in that giant house of yours and no one would be the wiser.”
“It’s not my house.”
“That’s not the point. You know what I mean.”
He’s quiet for a long moment and doesn’t speak until we pull onto a long drive, and he kills the engine. He takes the keys out of the ignition and turns to me, expression, as ever, unreadable.
“I’m not scary, remember? Hell, maybe I’m just a nice guy,” he deadpans.
I roll my eyes and turn toward the house, remembering what he’d said about our appointment.
“I don’t think you’re a nice guy,” I tell him.
“No, you’re right, I’m not. I’m not helping you, Blue. I’m helping myself. You threatened me. You threatened my family. You and I are enemies. Nothing has changed between us. Knowing Wren, well, she’s another means to an end?—”
“She’s not a means to an end. She’s a human being.”
“You love her which makes her a vulnerability. Something I can and will use to make you heel.”
I shake my head. “Of course you will,” I say and turn away.
He takes my chin between thumb and forefinger and makes me look at him. “Don’t get the wrong idea, sweetheart. What you said back there? I’m not your boyfriend.”
I jerk my face out of his grasp. “I didn’t think you were.”
“And more importantly, you don’t want me to be.” Something in how he says it makes me pause. Sends an icy thrill down my spine. His eyes narrow and he reaches into his pocket to retrieve my chain. “Almost forgot.”
I don’t speak. Instead, I just tilt my head back, my heart pounding as he hooks the chain back in place on my collar, reaffirming our roles.
“That’s better,” he says. “It’ll help you remember your place.”
“I was just thanking you. That’s all.”
“Don’t.”
The front door of the house opens, and a man steps out in a white doctor’s coat. Nausea makes the cupcake I ate sit like a brick in my belly.
“Let’s go get this taken care of so I can deliver that punishment I promised last night.”