Chapter 20
Twenty
Val
I immediately reached over and grabbed my glass of tea and gulped it down. Kaden was staring at me with curiosity dancing in his eyes and I felt myself begin to panic. “You just get right down to it, don’t you?”
“I want to know you.” He gave me a devious smile and paused. “That’s all. It doesn’t have to be your deepest and darkest secret.”
I knew I was going to have to share my past with him eventually if this was something I wanted to make work, but on a first date? That felt quick. “Are you one of those guys who only dates with the intention of marriage?”
He laughed nervously. “Perhaps you haven’t heard about my relationship with Isabella. She did leave because I wasn’t ready to commit.” Kaden stared blankly over my shoulder, lost in thought.
“Do you think you could ever be ready?” The words slipped out without even thinking and I immediately hoped I hadn’t offended him.
Kaden pursed his lips together. “For the right person, I could be.”
What did that mean? Was he indicating he thought I could be his person?
Do I want to be? Am I overthinking this?
Yes, yes I am. Probably because I want him to be the person for me.
The reality of the thoughts racing through my mind began to freak me out.
The things this man made me think and feel were insane and totally not my norm.
The control he had over my mind was insane.
“What does the right person look like to you?”
He smirked and gazed into my eyes. “Since you’re clearly trying to change the subject, why don’t you answer my question first. For each thing you tell me, I will give you one answer to what my right person could be.”
Shit.
Apparently the look on my face clued Kaden into my internal struggle. Or he’d been fighting for so long he has learned how to read people in every way imaginable. “Let’s start with, what is the real reason you moved to Colorado?”
You. But I wasn’t going to disclose that right away, was I?
I finished chewing my sushi and took another sip of tea while I debated how I would respond. How much would I tell him? “My ex, James, was extremely abusive. Like, put me in the hospital abusive.”
Kaden cut me off. “I’ll kill him.” He had a fire in his eyes I wouldn’t have expected. “Give me an address.”
His reaction made me smile. “He’s in jail, and should be there for a long time. Even when he gets out, he won’t be able to find me.”
I continued. “After he went off to jail, my friend Summer invited me over for a makeover and to watch the fights and I immediately fell in love. I wanted to learn to fight. Even if just for self-defense. So I set out to find a gym.”
“And you decided to move to Colorado?” I could see his wheels turning. “It feels like quite a stretch.”
“It is. Now, if you’ll let me continue,” I said playfully.
“I found a gym in my hometown in Arizona, Revelation Fitness. It was perfect, and they had a coach there who trained fighters. I worked hard, fought harder, putting in a ton of hours. He was even willing to work with me extra to help get me ready for the open mat.”
Kaden tilted his head and I could tell he was genuinely listening, and maybe even cared. “So, you began training with this guy. How did the open mat go?”
I exhaled slowly and began to share the story about what had happened.
How Mark bet against me and had never once trained me to focus on grappling.
I told him how being pinned had triggered me and how Mark was acting pissed I wasn’t listening when I genuinely had no idea what he was telling me to do.
“And finally, he got handsy and tried to gaslight me into believing I was the one who initiated everything. I still can’t say I didn’t, but I truly don’t believe I did. It was never my intention.”
He sat across from me in shock, a storm of anger and sadness brewing on his face. "I am so sorry for your experiences," Kaden said, holding his hands out, his fingers wiggling, a silent invitation for me to place my hand in his.
Anytime our skin touched, it sent a shock of electricity through my body, and holding hands with Kaden was no different. Only this time, things felt different, even better than before.
“It’s okay.” I attempted to smile but it probably came off as fake.
“After the open mat, I was sitting in a booth alone because Summer had abandoned me to go on a date and dropped the bomb about over-hearing Mark placing bets. I think I’ve subconsciously been mad at her since then.
” I paused, getting hung up on whether I was truly mad at Summer or not.
Kaden’s cough brought me back to the conversation.
“Anyways, I was sitting in the booth and watching the TV, kind of picking at my food. The station was replaying open mat highlights, and I kept seeing your face. I saw your interview, and there was just something about you... That’s when I began to think about moving out here. ”
“Wow,” was the only word Kaden could muster up. He just sat there silently for a few seconds. “So, what would you have done had I not had a space to train you?”
“Cry.” I laughed. “I guess I never really thought about it. I’m not really the spontaneous, pack up all my things and move away type. So I guess in the back of my mind it just wasn’t an option. Besides, technically, you didn’t have a space. You made a space, and charged me extra, remember?”
Kaden bit his lip as he nodded his head. “I guess you’re right.”
After sharing everything I couldn’t believe how badly I wanted to kiss him. He didn’t run. He didn’t cut the date short and tell me it was too much for him. He cared. What a strange feeling. “Okay, I shared some of my stuff. Now you have to share some of yours.”
He laughed. “I guess we did have a deal, didn’t we?
” He released hold of one of my hands so I could still eat and drink, but continued holding the other, slowly rubbing his thumb across the back of my hand.
“The right person for me would have to have an outstanding personality, be able to put up with my shit, and understand my lifestyle. I want her to have dreams and ambitions I can support, but I also want to feel supported. It might sound selfish, and maybe I am.”
I didn't feel like he was. I understood how it was difficult to be with someone who was jealous of your success but still expected you to cheer them on.
That was my experience, anyway. It would be nice to have a partner who supported me just as much as I supported them. “Makes sense to me.” I shrugged.
“It doesn’t make me sound like an asshole?” I couldn’t help but laugh regardless of how serious he sounded.
“If you sound like an asshole, then I too, am an asshole.”
We both laughed before he got serious again. “Now, tell me your darkest secret.”