Chapter 23
C lem couldn’t help it. She’d been checking social media to see what people’s reactions were to the recent round of Whisked Away – in part to distract herself from thoughts of Lucas, from the memory of that day at the library.
Her mum was out at work, doing some family portraits at someone’s home, and she had all day to herself.
It was rainy and grey, so she’d spent it mostly cocooned on the sofa, with Misha curled on the ridges of her legs, fast asleep and breathing softly.
Clem had eaten a full packet of cookies – the empty wrapping sat on the coffee table – partly driven by her guilt at accusing Lucas without proof and the niggling confusion about whether or not he was trustworthy.
In spite of the rain, it was warm, so she was dressed in a loose-fitting cotton dress. Misha wasn’t helping much with her fur and the added warmth, but Clem didn’t want to move her. She was stroking across her neck and spine as she slept, tracing the stripes.
Scrolling, scrolling, scrolling. Clem couldn’t stop. Something had shifted in the comments; that was evident. Misha adjusted herself on her legs, until she was coiled on her ankles instead.
Lucas had gone from the darling of the show to the villain, and it was causing more and more theories to sprout about their relationship off-screen.
Clem’s mouth turned bone-dry as she read them and realised what they were discussing.
As if things weren’t already difficult enough, the audience had noticed her strained interaction with Lucas.
She swiped up to the video of the round, watching until she saw herself on the screen behind the others, mouthing congratulations to Lucas.
The camera hadn’t picked up what she said to him next – the focus was on the contestants from Bundles of Bread, who’d been voted off.
But it was clear she’d said something . Clem knew exactly what she’d said.
I suppose you didn’t get your wish after all .
In the clip, Lucas’s face fell, his skin turning ashen and a crease marring his brow.
She’d been upset with him, so her own expression simply looked sad.
What’s the matter with him?? He seemed to really care about her before, and now he’s gone cold. It’s weird. Did something happen between them?
I can’t believe he didn’t help her this time!
He must have some sort of strategy to win and she’s part of it. He knows she’s talented, probably thinks she’s a threat. Maybe she realised that herself.
Lucas was really taking a beating in these comments. That last accusation made her throat pulse with emotion. Were they right? People thought she was talented, and that meant a lot. But were their suggestions about Lucas correct? She sighed, rubbing the back of her head, where an ache was starting.
Regardless of what the truth was, she didn’t enjoy seeing him being dragged like this.
He needed to win for the money to help his family, which she understood.
For her, she wasn’t sure it had really been about the money at all.
She had a small amount tucked away already to use for moving out; any extra for starting her business would be a bonus.
She could build on that by living here a while longer. Lucas was in a more dire situation.
But he’d seemed adamant that he wouldn’t lie or trick her in order to win.
She wanted him to be telling the truth, because she wasn’t sure what she’d do if she learned he’d been using her.
Three quick raps came on the door knocker, making her jump. Misha leaped up in surprise, rushing upstairs to hide. Clem sat up. Maybe her mum was expecting a package? She shoved her feet into her slippers and headed for the front door.
The last person she expected to see standing there on the step was Lucas. She froze, the door half open.
Now, that flutter stirred within, like a butterfly preparing to take flight.
He was wearing a loose blue V-neck and dark jeans, and she was struck once again by the intensity of his green eyes and thick brows.
She couldn’t believe she’d forgotten about him, and that he’d been the guy she’d seen in the library.
‘What are you doing here?’ she asked. She didn’t open the door fully. Half of her wanted to usher him inside and kiss him senseless – he looked so good in blue – and the other half wanted to send him away, the comments she’d read online repeating in her mind like a chant.
‘Can we talk?’ he said quietly.
‘About what?’ She wondered if he’d seen the comments flying around the internet too.
‘I know you’re upset with me. But I’d like to talk,’ he reiterated.
She glanced over her shoulder at the empty cookie packaging and scattered crumbs on the coffee table, and The Hobbit playing on the TV. Conscious of the mess, she yanked the door open fully anyway.
He stepped inside, and she shut the door behind him. ‘Thanks,’ he said.
‘Do you want something to drink?’
‘No, it’s okay. I won’t stay long.’ He hovered by the door awkwardly as Clem took a seat on the sofa nearby. He didn’t sit down, so she turned to the side so she could see him better.
‘I wanted to apologise,’ he told her, ‘for inviting Georgina to the contest to be in the audience. If I’d known you two were friends—’
‘We’re not friends anymore,’ said Clem quickly.
‘Right. But if I’d known what had happened – that she was the one who filmed that video of you – I never would have asked her.’
She nodded, unsure of what to say, shifting on the sofa awkwardly.
Misha crept out from the stairs slowly, sniffing along the carpet and looking up at Lucas uncertainly.
Apparently deciding he wasn’t a threat, she padded inside and rolled over on the rug, rubbing herself against the material and stretching out her front paws.
‘And I want you to know – I didn’t sabotage you, Clem.
I didn’t lie,’ he said firmly, holding eye contact.
The intensity of his expression made her chest whoosh and she had to look away.
‘That day, I’d just found out my dad was in hospital.
I was trying to help you, but I was thinking quick, trying to remember tips I’d heard, so I could leave, and make sure he was okay.
’ He took a long, deep breath. ‘If you can’t believe me on that . . .’
Hot shame crept over Clem’s face, the guilt chewing away at her. Her mind had turned cluttered and messy – filled with social media comments, with Genie’s actions in the past, with her own anxieties piling up like stacks of crumpled paper.
He was looking at his trainers now, not at her directly, and he looked . . . hurt . Sunshine was gleaming through the small, arched window above their front door, outlining him in yellow light, as if the world itself wanted to highlight him.
‘I’m sorry for accusing you. I didn’t know what to think,’ she said, and rushed on desperately, trying to excuse herself even though she felt terrible now.
‘I know you want to win.’ She fumbled around in the dark for more reasons.
‘I’ve not known you very long,’ she finished uselessly. ‘I’m really sorry.’
‘I’m not that kind of person – I offered to help you and it was genuine,’ he said, letting out another sigh. ‘Although . . .’
‘What?’ The word tripped over itself, stumbled – her pulse spiking. He’d said he wasn’t interested in her, but it was before they’d found out about their interaction in the library.
‘It looks like you didn’t need my help after all,’ he explained, brushing his fingers through his dark hair and prompting her lips to part involuntarily. ‘You figured it out, made those kitten buns a success. You really have a good chance of winning this, Clem.’
The air was sucked out of Clem’s chest. The last thing she’d expected him to do was compliment her like this.
She wished he wouldn’t be so nice about her – she hadn’t even sent off the application herself.
She didn’t need this in the same way that he did, and it was eating her up.
‘I . . . Lucas,’ she fumbled. ‘Listen . . .’
He shook his head. ‘No, it’s fine. We’ve only just started to get to know each other, and I’m sure you’ve been reading those comments online . . .’
‘It’s not fine,’ she ground out, frustrated with herself.
She had misjudged him, suspected he was going to hurt her like Genie had, and yet he didn’t know the truth about how she got to this point in the contest. ‘I didn’t even enter Whisked Away myself!
’ The words came out in a big, breathless rush.
The silence was thick with her admission. Eventually, he said, ‘What?’
‘I started filling out the application and got scared. The only reason I’m here is because Sylvie saw my half-finished form and thought I’d forgotten to ask her to fill in her sections. She completed it and sent it off on the staff laptop.’
He didn’t say anything.
‘I’m so sorry. I shouldn’t be here, but you and your family need this . . .’
‘Don’t pity us Clem,’ said Lucas, and his eyes flashed. He gave her a stern look she’d never seen on him before, one that made her flush.
‘I wasn’t. I just . . .’
‘Forget about it,’ he said, waving her remark away. ‘I’m not holding it against you. You got into the contest, didn’t you? It doesn’t matter how you got here. Your skill is what gets you through the rounds.’
Lucas had his hands stuffed in his pockets and was shifting on the balls of his feet, as if trying to decide whether to stay or leave.
Did he really not care about how she’d come to be on Whisked Away , or was he trying to mask how he truly felt about it?
She couldn’t tell, and he looked reluctant to keep talking about it.
‘Was there something else you wanted to talk about?’ she asked hopefully.
They still hadn’t addressed whatever was building between them, in spite of everything going on.
‘You said . . . you said you always hoped you’d run into me again someday, didn’t you?
After we first saw each other in the library? ’