CHAPTER TWELVE
My brother and I sat in silence for some time until he moved to sit next to me, squeezing into the large armchair beside me. Since I had scared him, I couldn’t approach him again.
“How bad was it?”
“The night I met Alexius, I learned how little control the new vampires had. One had become obsessed with me. Followed me, attacked me. I had, at that point, bought pepper spray, a taser… and a gun. All recommendations from Rupert, you know the human who takes care of Alexius and me. He was trying to help me stay alive until help could get to me, and I ended up needing it. Fought for my life until he got there.” I took a deep breath.
“Or perhaps we can talk about the night it all ended. Edwin was throwing a party, invited a bunch of other vampires to show off or something. I needed to sneak in while he was distracted and break into his computer. Alexius and I were positive he had incriminating evidence somewhere; one of us had to find it. Alexius wasn’t able to just go in and kick the hornet’s nest. Evidence can be deleted if you kick the nest first. I got the evidence.
I found the transactions, the emails… and I was caught after texting it to Alexius, trying to get out. ”
I was staring not at my brother but at the space Alexius had been standing in some time before. I could imagine him there, which was better than remembering the night I died.
“I knew I was going to die, Declan.” I chuckled, a little mad, a little crazy.
“And I laughed in our mother’s killer’s face.
Told him he was going to die. He drained me in front of an audience after I told him Alexius would come kill them all.
And I… was okay with dying at that point.
” I tried to smile as I turned to Declan.
“I woke up in Savannah. Apparently, Alexius was already just close enough that as he killed Edwin, he could feed my body Edwin’s blood.
Because Edwin died before I finished the Turn, he’s not really my creator.
I’m considered an Orphan, disconnected from the blood’s generations of control from sire to new vampire.
Edwin’s sire, whoever that is, couldn’t control me either.
And Alexius didn’t know how much blood Edwin had exchanged with Claire, his lover, the more powerful of the two.
“So, I came out a bit stronger than anyone thought I would because a lot of Claire got through. She also died that night, nothing to worry about.” I pushed a hand through my hair.
“So yeah, I woke up a vampire, having fully accepted I was dying. That I got my revenge, and you were safe, and it was over. I got up with a chip on my shoulder and a bone to pick with the vampires of the world. I had an offer, and I took it.”
He hugged me, and I finally cried.
“I’m so sorry,” he whispered as he rocked me. “I owe you everything. You went through all that for me and Mom, and she’ll never know, and I think I would have never known if you had your way. I’m so sorry.”
“It’s okay!” I said, trying to wipe my eyes, fighting the tears of grief for a life I tried to never think about.
I groaned as I remembered the color the tears would be.
“Let me clean up before I stain anything. It’s just…
it is what it is, Declan. I made the choice to stay with the vampires, and you chose to leave, and if people were going to die, it didn’t need to be you.
And… while I might be fucking crazy now, I like my job.
I stopped a roving band of newly turned vampires in Alaska on a murder spree.
I’ve met new types of supernaturals we’d never heard of.
” The nagas and cambions came to mind. “And I’m finally strong enough to face the world without shaking in my shoes.
“I can talk to people because being a vampire, some of the reactions humans have are really hard to elicit from us. We can blush, but it’s not every second at the smallest embarrassment.
All the social anxiety I had? Most of it’s gone unless someone is intentionally trying to throw me off.
” I found extra paper towels and tissues in his pantry and started cleaning up my face and hands.
“I finally feel like… I’m doing what I should be.
For now. It could change in a decade or two.
Or tomorrow or never. But I’m not really mad about what I am.
I’m more upset that I failed to keep you out of it. ”
“And it’s too late now to get out of it,” he said, shrugging. “You’ve already made the enemies, and we’re known to be siblings.”
“Yeah, as a vampire those are never going away until someone is dead… more dead. Dead again?” I sighed.
“We’re not really undead, fun fact. Our heart beats, just irregularly.
I think that vampire physiology just changes how all our internal systems work.
It just requires us to die to begin the process of changing all of it. ”
“And now you’re trying to hide from the more important parts of the conversation, which is the fight for your life. You’ve always liked to use facts and information to hide what was really important, which is that you are in danger.”
“I’ve already had a few,” I reminded him.
“While human, even. I’ll be fine. Alexius and I train…
all the time, endlessly. He’s the best there is at killing other vampires.
He’s not really the best at teaching someone how to be a vampire.
From the stories, Jacob taught him more than he taught Jacob.
However, when it comes to killing vampires, Alexius the Hunter is called that for a reason.
He’s the vampire hunter humans wished they had.
He’s also older. Like… we never knew Jacob was a Greek over two thousand years old.
Alexius is even older than that. So old that while people call him the Macedonian, he’s probably not.
He just looks like he’s from the region. ”
“What?”
“Yeah! And he doesn’t really know how old he is, either. When he became a vampire, they were all mindless, fueled by the need for blood without understanding. Jacob brought him out of that before he ever became a vampire. Alexius is really powerful. I have the best guy I can in my corner.”
“The once mindless killing machine. Yeah.” Declan was nodding, but his face was pale.
“Yeah, that doesn’t sound great, does it?
” I looked at the blood tissues and sighed, throwing them away.
“He’s really nice. He’s made sure I’m protected at home in Savannah.
He’s more forgiving of my mistakes than anyone else.
He’s always teaching me something I need and trying to get me to be a better vampire.
He changes his plans so they fit with my needs. ”
“I don’t think you’ve really thought about how out of character this really sounds from you.
And I guess I was just willfully in denial when you mentioned anything close to it on our calls.
Because it’s… this isn’t just changed a bit, like it grew up or became more confident.
This is like your body snatched, Everly. ”
I remembered something Alexius had told me early on in my new life as a vampire.
How it was well known that something about becoming a vampire really changed a person, whether it amplified something or revealed it about a person in a way that made them different.
For me, it was pretty obvious it was my temper—something I used to hide, never indulge—could now pop off like a firecracker or go off like a bomb, and I was finally strong enough to do something about the evil that had destroyed my life.
Other things that had changed about me were more from the trauma of it all than becoming a vampire.
But where Alexius barely had known the original human me and watched me struggle through trauma and death into this new life, my brother knew the old me perfectly well and had never dealt with this new version, not up close, not through the carefully crafted version of myself on calls.
“Ah.” I dropped what I was holding. “I see. I, um…” I didn’t have a proper response.
“I think you’ll just have to get used to this version of me, Declan.
This is who I am now. Alexius is the person I trust with my life.
I work for powerful people and talk to powerful people.
I could call Lexi’s Alpha, one of the two strongest werewolves in the world, on the phone to talk about her.
I hunt vampires. My perspective has changed, and outside of you, there’s nothing left of my human life I care to keep. ”
“You can’t deny it’s not a little terrifying to hear you talk about a mindless killing machine of a boss and then smiling like there’s nothing wrong with that.”
“He’s the one who got me out,” I snapped. “He did that, and he didn’t have to.”
“So, he could mold you into…” He waved his hand at me.
“That’s a fucked-up thing to say, Declan,” I said, glaring at him. “He’s not molding me. He’s helping me become what I want to be.”
“You haven’t really tried anything else, though,” he retorted. “Everly—”
“So, for the second night in a row, this needs to be cut short. I think you need to really let it sink in that I’m not the sister you grew up with.
I haven’t been since before the funeral.
I just hadn’t realized it yet. It hadn’t sunk in with me how different it is either until right now.
And you’re still you, just blemished a little with grief because we lost Mom, but it’s understandable that losing her would finally push you to figure out your own life.
” I tapped my fingers on the kitchen counter, then started walking towards his front door.
“And this is how I survived it. Because without this, I wouldn’t have.
You would have gone to a second funeral before the end of that year, and they would have told you that there had been a fire or something.
The entire place was dismantled when all was said and done.
I guess it’s preferable to the girl in front of you, though. ”
“Now that is a fucked-up thing to say! Everly, wait, please!”
Ignoring his pleas, I left without saying goodbye, sick to my stomach. Body snatched, he’d said. As if I couldn’t possibly be me. As if I had been replaced against my will or something.
I was what circumstance needed me to be. I was finally happy and secure in my own skin. I was good at things finally. I could run without wanting to die. I could jump. I could hunt things from miles away. I was fast and powerful, and I loved it.
And he clearly didn’t. He liked the softer version. More confident was good, but anything past that was scary.
I didn’t want to go back to the house Maria had lent us.
I got into my car and drove around for an hour, ignoring Declan’s calls until I parked and looked at the list Lexi gave me.
Perhaps I could go find somewhere to sit quietly and enjoy the night, people watch without having to hide that I was people watching.
There was a café that seemed promising. I still had plenty of time in the evening, so the drive wasn’t a concern for me.
I flew there, speeding on every open stretch of road I had and not looking back.
I needed to get into a space where being a vampire was just okay.
And I was going to make that happen. I was going to go back to my world where Declan wasn’t there to look at me like I wasn’t his sister.
I wondered what the café would have, but I didn’t get my hopes up on if they had blood on offer. I had a black card though, so if they did have it, I was willing to pay whatever they asked.