25. Miller
“There!” Becca points, whispering just loudly enough that I can hear her over the sound of our footsteps on the wet ground.
I follow the path of her pointed finger, and I see it, too. Bayley is slumped against a tree, her eyes closed. We run to her together, and I crouch down beside the small body.
“Bayley?” I tap her shoulder.
“Is she okay?” Becca asks, kneeling next to me. “Bayley?”
Bayley’s eyes crack open. A rush of relief goes through me. “Are you okay, kiddo? You scared us.”
She blinks a few times, then focuses on Becca. “Becca? You found me!” She reaches her arms out, and Becca folds her into a hug.
“Of course we found you, Bay. We’ve been looking for a while. What happened?”
Bayley draws in a shaky breath, looking between the two of us. Her lower lip trembles. “I feel silly now.”
I shake my head dramatically. “Hey, no feeling silly. We were scared because we were worried about you. We’re not mad, and we’ve all done silly things.”
She swallows as she sits up a little straighter. “I just wanted some time to think. We stayed up in the tent talking and we were having fun. We were talking about all of the activities we want to do next week at camp. I want to do the goat class. Mollie said it’s really funny.”
“I hate that goat,” I say without thinking. It kind of pops out by accident—God knows it’s the truth—but it earns me a smile.
Bayley even giggles for a few seconds before she sobers again and continues to talk. “But then Mollie and Savannah and Lena were all talking about what they were going to say to their parents when they wrote to them when we got back. And…”
After a minute, Becca prompts her softly. “And what, Bayley?”
The girl sniffles, and I realize she has tears welling in her eyes. “And it made me think about my parents.”
Becca and I exchange a questioning glance.
“Are you missing your parents?” I ask gently. Homesickness is one thing, but leaving the tent in the middle of the night?
Bayley shakes her head, wiping a hand beneath her nose. “I mean, I am. But it made me sad because my parents sent me to camp so they could… could pack things.” She meets my eyes, and a tear runs down her cheek. “My daddy is moving out cause they’re getting divorced.”
Her words hit me right in the heart. Suddenly I’m a kid again, not much older than my campers, hearing that speech. Your mom and I love you kids very much, but…
I twist so I’m sitting on the ground next to Bayley. “That sucks. I’m really sorry.”
Becca gives me a sharp look from where she’s crouched in front of us. Maybe sucks is one of those words you’re not supposed to use in front of campers. But honestly? This is a situation that calls for it. Trust me, I know.
“My parents got divorced when I was eleven,” I tell Bayley softly. “I was really sad for a long time.”
Bayley’s eyes widen as I speak, worry creasing her forehead. “They said it’s not my fault. But then they sent me away to camp.”
I reach an arm out, and she snuggles into my side. Jesus, she’s freezing. How long has she been out here? I look at Becca, trying to communicate silently. We need to get Bayley back to the campsite, then back to camp as soon as we can.
I give Bayley’s shoulder a gentle squeeze. “I bet they sent you to camp because they thought you’d have fun here, and being around people who are getting divorced isn’t very much fun.”
She nods, looking thoughtful. “My mom and dad fight all the time.”
“That can be scary to hear, too, huh?” Jordan was too little to understand what was happening back then, but I knew. I remember the fear that froze in my chest every time they started yelling at one another.
Becca stands from where she’s been crouched down and takes a few steps back, giving Bayley and me some space.
“I don’t like hearing them fight, so maybe you’re right about that. And camp is fun,” Bayley admits.
I squeeze her shoulder comfortingly. “And next week is going to be a lot of fun, too. Maybe even more fun than last week. Especially if you hang out with the goat.” I wink at her.
Bayley giggles, the smile brightening her entire face.
“How long have you been out here?” I ask her.
She shivers against me, like she’s finally realizing how cold she is. “All night.”
Becca’s leaning against a tree a few feet away, but she must be able to hear us still, because her eyes go wide, and she stands up straighter.
“Can you tell me what happened?” I ask.
Bayley shifts on the ground next to me. “We were talking in the tent, like I said. And I just wanted to be alone to think. So, after the other girls fell asleep, I snuck out and walked for a little bit. But then it was dark, and I couldn’t find my way back, so I sat down here. I must have fallen asleep.” She shrugs.
I don’t miss Becca’s sharp intake of breath. I nearly gasp, too. What if a bear or mountain lion or something had found her before we did? What if she’d taken a wrong turn and fallen? Jesus, this could have turned out so badly.
I force my voice to stay level. None of those things happened. Bayley is safe.
“Well, I’m glad we found you. Next time, you need to tell us if you’re leaving the tent, okay? We need to know where you are. Or one of us would have walked with you.”
She nods, wiping another tear off her cheek. “I didn’t know your parents got divorced. I didn’t want to talk to the girls about it because it seems like their parents are so happy and they wouldn’t understand.”
“I get it.” I give her a small side hug. “I’m happy to talk about it whenever you want, okay? There are a lot of other people who’ve gone through it, too, that you can talk to. And you know what?” I lean down with a conspiratorial whisper. “My parents are both happier now. They were making one another sad.”
My mom is happier, at least. We haven’t heard from my dad in years, but Bayley doesn’t need to know all of that right now.
This earns me another smile that warms my heart. “I don’t want my mom and dad to be sad.”
“Exactly. Now, should we head back? Everyone else is worried about you.” I stand and hold a hand out.
Bayley takes it and rises to her feet. “Are you going to tell them about my parents?”
“Absolutely not.” I look at Becca, who dips her chin in a small nod. “And Becca won’t, either. That’s your stuff. Thank you for sharing with us. But neither of us will ever break your confidence about this. What would you like us to tell them?”
Bayley thinks as we start to walk. “Can you just tell them I went to the woods to go to the bathroom and got lost?”
I laugh. “If sneaking out to pee is less embarrassing, then you’ve got it. That’s our story and we’re sticking to it.”
We can’t be more than a five-minute walk from the campsite, but when I look up, the clouds have gotten even darker. I take Becca’s hand and squeeze it.
“Can you walk a little faster, Bay? It looks like it’s going to rain,” Becca says nervously.
Bayley nods and increases her speed a little. We trek together in silence, keeping our eyes on the ground to avoid tripping. The first raindrops start to fall just as the tents come into view through the trees.
“Go, go, go!” Becca cries, laughing.
We run the last few feet to the campsite. I go to the boys’ tent while Becca and Bayley head to the other.
I unzip the flap and stick my head in. “Good news, boys. We found Bayley. She just got lost, but everything is fine. It’s starting to rain again, so we’re going to hang out in our tents until it passes, then pack up and head back to camp, okay?”
All three boys have big smiles on their faces.
“I’m so glad you found her!” Liam says.
Ben nods eagerly. “I like her. We put up the tent together and she was so much fun. Now we’re like best friends.”
See? Told you they’d bond if they did the tents themselves.
“Yeah. She’s super cool,” Noah adds.
“I’ll let her know. While it rains, why don’t you guys make sure everything is packed up in your backpacks so we can head back as soon as it stops?” I wait for them to agree before I zip the flap back up and head to my tent.
Voices drift over from where Becca and Bayley are sitting in the girls’ tent.
“We were so worried about you!”
“Are you okay? Are you still going to be at camp this week?”
“Do you want me to carry your backpack on the way back?”
I can’t help but snort at that last one. It sounded like Lena. Her heart’s in the right place, but how is she planning to carry two massive frame backpacks down the mountain?
The chatter continues for a few more minutes before the zipper on my tent slides open and Becca slips inside.
“It seems like she’s okay,” she remarks, scooting in to sit next to me. “A little shaken up and chilly from spending the night outside, but she’s going to be fine.”
I reach and arm out and pull Becca into my side in a mirror image of the way I was sitting with Bayley under the tree. “And how are you doing?”
She shrugs. “Okay, I guess. I was kind of freaking out.”
“You don’t say,” I tease, giving her arm a squeeze. “You? Freaking out? Never.”
She gives me a good-natured shove. “Shut up. Plus, you aren’t the one who’s going to have to call her parents.”
“True. But I will if you need me to.”
She’s silent for a minute, looking at the tent wall. “I didn’t know about your parents. I’m sorry.”
“It was a long time ago. But I get where Bayley’s coming from. I was pretty torn up about it for a while after it happened.”
Becca twists to look at me. “But they’re happier now?”
“Oh. Um.” I drop my voice low, so Bayley can’t hear us. “My mom is. My dad actually left us. I haven’t heard from him in years. I didn’t think Bayley needed to hear all of that, though.”
“Oh. Shit, I’m sorry,” Becca says with a frown.
I give her a grin, trying to lighten the mood. “My mom more than makes up for it. She’s as cool as two parents any day. You should meet her. You’d like her.”
Becca is silent for a minute. “Parents are weird, huh?”
Slight change of topic, but I’ll take it. “I mean, sure. Why?”
“Like, we love them, and they love us, but the things they do and the way they raise us makes us into who we are.”
I nod. “True. I swear a lot because of my mom. Lori Quinlan swears like a sailor.”
Becca giggles. “I want to meet her someday. My parents are more… serious, I guess.” She frowns. “I can’t tell them about failing my second year of school. They don’t even know I failed one class, let alone two.”
“Why?” I can’t imagine keeping anything from my mom. She’s the one I go to for advice, the one I lean on when things get tough. I’ve always known we had a unique relationship, but it’s such a part of who I am that I can’t imagine what I’d do if I couldn’t talk to her about things.
“They’d be so disappointed. My dad got himself from an Indian immigrant kid who couldn’t speak English all the way to being a cardiothoracic surgeon. And I can’t even hack it with all the help they’ve given me along the way.” Her shoulders slump.
“And then what? What would happen if they were disappointed in you?” I push.
She thinks for a minute. “I… I don’t know. I just hate disappointing them.”
“Would they stop loving you?” I tilt my head.
She pauses. “I… no. I don’t think so.”
“Or supporting you?” I prod.
Becca shoves me. “Jesus, you’re like a goddamn shrink.”
I grin. “Hey, I took a few psych classes back in college. Maybe I’m like half a shrink. Or half a therapist or something.”
She snorts. “Yeah. That’s what the world needs. Miller Quinlan, therapist.”
“My patients would leave laughing,” I say innocently. “And pulling pranks makes everyone happy, so I’d consider that a good therapeutic option.”
Becca’s body shakes with laughter before she relaxes against me. “You’re different than I thought you were,” she admits.
“So you said.” And I don’t know which god or higher power to thank for the fact that she realized that, but if I find out, I’ll be on my knees thanking them every fucking day for the rest of my life.
Becca sits up, away from me, and looks me in the eye. She bites her lip. “So, um. What are we going to tell people when we get back to camp?”