50. Dan #2
“Just accept the compliment, you bellend. Seriously, what do I have to say? I don’t wanna live without you.
I basically have a shrine to you on my phone, so that should tell you something.
And I know you know how obsessed I am with you.
That obsession’s been there all my life, not that I wanted to admit it before.
Now it’s…y’know. At this point, it’s not going anywhere. ”
“You know how obsessed I am with you too.” His chest rose and fell rapidly beneath me as he struggled to get his emotions under control, and despite my overheated face after basically baring my soul to him, I was glad I’d said the words. He needed to hear them, maybe even more than I’d realised.
“But do you have a shrine to me on your phone?”
He exhaled slowly, and this time when he looked at me, his eyes were smiling. “By shrine, do you mean a stalker’s dossier?”
“Two different ways of saying the same thing.”
Instead of replying, he reached for his phone. When he’d unlocked it, he tapped at the screen and then held it up so I could see.
Oh, yeah. This boy was obsessed with me. “Wow, Link. You might have a problem. Eight different subfolders? All for me?”
“Fuck you, Hoyton. How many do you have?”
“Uh…”
“Daniel.”
“Eleven. But in my defence, at least two of them could be merged. Probably more.”
“Hmm. You have my photos on your wall.”
“So? You wank over my photos every night.”
“Always lowering the tone.”
“You love it.”
“Yeah, I do,” he said softly, wrapping his fingers around my nape and pulling me into a kiss.
When we broke apart, I shifted over so I wasn’t completely crushing him with my body weight and rested my head on the pillow next to him.
After pulling the covers back over us, I fumbled for his hand, sliding my fingers through his.
“Are you okay to carry on? We can take a break if you want.”
He rubbed his thumb over my skin. “I…it’s hard to talk about, but you seem to know how to make it easier. You lighten the heavy parts.”
I leaned in, brushing my lips over his cheek. “I’m glad, but I can be serious, I promise. If I, y’know, get too much or whatever—”
“You’re never too much for me. Never, ever,” he said fiercely. “And I know you can be serious. You always get the balance right with me. You know me, Dan, better than anyone else.”
There was a huge lump in my throat. “Same,” I managed to choke out, and Lincoln lifted his head, cupping my jaw as he slid his lips over mine.
I kissed him back with everything I had, speaking to him without words, telling him how fucking grateful I was that he was in my life, and we were together again.
Resting his head back down on the pillow, he sighed.
“So…the party. My father had beaten me right outside. In the car, in fact. I’d questioned why we had to go to the event, because I was missing out on movie night at school.
I’d been boarding from the age of seven, but they pulled me out sometimes when they wanted to appear at events as a family.
Keeping up appearances, you know. I was being an annoying little kid—”
“No kid deserves to be beaten.”
“I know. I know that now, anyway. At the time, I just thought, what’s wrong with me?
Why can’t I be the child they want me to be?
Why can’t I be more like my brother?” Fuck, Link.
I squeezed his hand, and he gave me a tiny smile before continuing.
“We went inside, and I was struggling to walk properly because he’d hit the backs of my legs so hard, and my mother clipped me around the ear, warning me to stand up straight.
That was when I saw you. You were standing on the other side of the foyer, grinning up at your uncle.
You were saying something to him—I couldn’t hear what it was, but whatever it was, it made him laugh.
He crouched down, this big, scary-looking crime boss, and let you climb onto his back. ”
“Neil isn’t scary. He’s like, I dunno, a teddy bear, or maybe a grizzly bear.”
“He might be to you, but to me, he was someone from a nightmare. Someone my parents hated. Someone they looked down on. Someone they told me horror stories about.”
“I bet most of them were made up. Ryker’s dad is the one where the horror stories are true. Or Volkov’s family. Don’t get on their bad side.”
“Are you going to let me finish?” He shot me an exasperated look, but I knew he wasn’t really annoyed because his lips were twitching again.
I nodded, and he quickly kissed me before continuing.
“You climbed on his back, and he spun you around, probably two or three times. You were both laughing. Then I remember your mum coming over to you both, and I thought maybe she’d tell you off, like my parents would’ve done, but she just smiled and ruffled your hair, then kissed your cheek.
That was when I knew, really knew, that my parents were wrong. ”
“They were.”
“Yeah,” he whispered. His voice cracked.
“I couldn’t stop staring at your family, so full of love and happiness, and all I could think was why?
Why are we supposed to be the good guys, but we don’t show any affection?
Why is anger and disappointment the only thing between my parents and me? Why don’t my parents love me?”
My jaw clenched. I was about to start my new villain arc, and the first two people on my hit list would be those fucking cold, callous assholes who had dared to make my boyfriend feel so unloved.
“I hate them. They fucking failed you. They don’t deserve you. They deserve to rot in prison for life for what they did to you.” Lincoln’s mouth twisted, and I was instantly on alert. “Link? What aren’t you telling me?”
Rubbing his hand across his face, he inhaled shakily.
“That was the same night my father broke my arm. He’d been drinking, and when we got home, he continued drinking.
I went to my hiding place, and he—no, my mother found me first. I guess she’d been drinking too, and she started screaming about how my brother was gone and it was somehow my fault.
I-I answered back. I shouted that it wasn’t my fault, and that was when my father showed up, and he— Shit.
All I remember was agonising pain and then waking up in the hospital with my father threatening me. I had to tell everyone I’d fallen.”
I was fucking horrified. Tears burned my eyes. Tears of pain for the man I loved, and tears of fucking rage for the evil fucking bastards who had deliberately brought suffering to a small, defenceless child with no way of fighting back.
“Lincoln. Whenever they get out of prison—if they get out of prison—I promise you I’m going after them. I don’t enjoy torture, but I’m going to break every single one of their bones, one by one, and then I’m going to set them on fucking fire and watch them burn alive. Happily.”
“Baby.” He sighed. “I’m a little disturbed that I find this psycho side of you appealing, but they’re not worth it, I promise. I spent so much time wishing they would love me, and you know what? Now I’m glad that they never did. I feel nothing for them.”
“Good,” I said savagely. “They deserve nothing from you. They deserve to rot in jail for life.” And die a very painful death.
“At least I had Mike. It was difficult when I was growing up because he was barely an adult himself, trying to get his career started, and then Tilly came along after a one-night stand… But now we’re close, and he and Tilly are the two people who keep me going.”
“They love you.”
“They do.”
“I’m so glad you have them,” I said sincerely. “And now you have me too.”
“Yeah.” He gave me a soft, affectionate smile. “Okay, let me get through the rest of it. When my father first mentioned Operation Foxglove…”
By the time Lincoln had finished talking, I could understand exactly where he’d been coming from when he’d thought that he had to deal with his dad’s threats alone. Honestly, if I’d been in his situation, if I’d been brought up the way he had, then I probably would have done the same.
“We’re a team now, and you don’t have to deal with anything else on your own again,” I promised him. “Ever.”
Our eyes met, and he swallowed hard. “How can you be so sure?”
“Because I love you,” I said. “I’ve never been more sure about anything.”
His eyes widened as he stared at me in disbelief.
“I love you,” I said again. “I love you so much.”
“Dan.” He took an unsteady breath, rapidly blinking his dark lashes, and then he smiled, soft and small and shy, and just for me.
“I thought I would struggle to say this, because it’s not something I get to say, or hear anyone say to me.
But somehow, you make it easy.” His hazel eyes were fixed on me, brimming with emotion as his mouth formed the words. “I love you.”
How was it possible to smile this widely? My mouth felt as if it was going to split open. “I thought I heard you say something in the mansion about the love of your life.”
“Of course you heard that.”
“I did. And just so you know, you’re the love of my life too.”
He pulled me into a kiss. “Fucking love you, baby. So, so much.”
“Mmm. I made my favourite enemy love me.”
“Shut up.”
“Make me.”
With a growl, he slanted his mouth over mine.
Much, much later, when I was on the edge of sleep, Lincoln leaned in, brushing his lips over my ear.
“Sometimes it feels as if I’ve been waiting all my life for you,” he said quietly.
My heart swelled as I grinned into the darkness. “I know exactly what you mean.”