20. Nat
TWENTY
Nat
What just happened? Was it real life or some strange dream about my addictive roommate?
All this need and want had only one place to go. He seemed frozen on top of me, his perfect lips still only millimeters from mine.
Jack’s breath, a sweet puff of air, tingled over my face as he stared at me.
One minute we’d been working, arguing, our normal.
Next, we were this. Wrapped up and completely lost to the world, clinging and dirty without a care.
He touched my cheek tenderly, and I let out the smallest gasp as he moved to hold my chin.
Mud from his hand smeared across my face, and I smiled.
Was mud an aphrodisiac? Because I wanted those lips to meet mine, to linger and play and lavish me again. But Jack moved his hand, and he got to his knees, pensively staring down at me.
Why was this hotter than it should have been? I lay there, ready and waiting for him to move me into whatever position he wanted, but then he looked away.
The bubble we had been in just moments ago burst, and I wasn’t ready for that. I wasn’t ready for the quiet look on his face as he stood up and reached a hand down to me.
Apparently, the time to come out of the mud was now. It was all for the best anyway. I needed this spell to break. Needed to get myself together.
I took his hand and grinned at him while my arms shot out to each side of my body, and I caught my balance. “You look like you had a mud mask.”
He chuffed out a strangled laugh at my joke and shook his head. His hand moved to my lower back, where he helped me regain my balance. I took a wobbly step, unsteady.
He kept a supportive hand on me. “And you look like a baby fawn.”
I smiled and took another step, my stuck boot making a funny squelching noise. Jack’s laugh escaped, and his grip on me tightened. Only the touch, grounding as it was, had me leaning into it rather than stabilizing myself. I tried for another step and promptly slipped and fell.
Correction. We fell.
I grabbed for Jack and took him down with me. We both sat on our asses, laughing with each other. His eyes were so beautiful like this. Crinkled at the sides. Blue and playful and, best of all, focused solely on me. There was no hatred, just heat.
Oh my god. I kissed my nemesis. Not just kissed. I made out with Jack. I wanted more from him, and I couldn’t deny how right his hands felt on me. How perfect our lips were. His guiding touch, insistent and warm. Damn, I really wanted more.
As if it were written across my face, Jack seemed to realize what I was thinking.
His expression went from dreamy to moon-eyed to surprised, until a gruffness settled over his face.
If I were being honest, it was exactly what I’d expected from him.
And just like that, the once-scorching moment morphed into an unbelievably awkward one.
Something about that made my heart sink in my chest like a battered ship.
“Jack, I—”
His eyes darted away from mine, and it was clear we weren’t going to talk about this right now. “Let’s go get cleaned up.” He pulled me up again, sturdier this time. Not laughing at the state of our clothing or the sounds we made as we pulled ourselves out of the mud and into reality.
Finally, on solid ground, I resolved not to overthink my reaction to him. It was basic animalistic lust, that was all. It meant nothing.
As I walked a step behind Jack in the quiet, I was only comforted by the fact that I wasn’t the only one shaken up by our actions. The surprise and heat of our kiss. Jack was probably just as confused about the whole thing as I was. I didn’t know if that was comforting or not.
One thing was certain about this whole scenario. It couldn’t happen again.
Heat gathered around my cheeks and neck, and I worried even the mud wouldn’t be able to hide my blush as I recalled the embarrassing confession I’d made while drunk two nights ago.
Traitorous words that had just flown out of my mouth.
No thoughts or filters. No self-preservation.
Just a late-night, tipsy confession no one had asked for.
But in my defense, he had looked really good that night, even disheveled.
He’d been friendly, not just to everyone but to me as well.
Was this impromptu mud make-out because of that inconvenient confession? Or had he been obsessing over how our lips might align, what I might taste like, just like I wondered about him?
Either way, we’d promised Leo we’d be professional. Which we would be if you considered bickering hyenas professional.
Professionalism had died the moment Jack’s hands came around me, the second our tongues collided perfectly. Too perfectly.
But that was the problem with me.
I’d always been unlucky in love, and it seemed like that streak was far from over. Because falling for my enemy-turned-inconvenient roommate would seal my fate as really, really unlucky.
This was it.
This was the epitome of what the fuck am I doing?
Jack mechanically stripped out of his clothes as we stood at the dock on the far end of camp. There wasn’t anything particularly sexy about it, except for his stupid body.
It’s just a body, I tried to tell myself. So why couldn’t I take my eyes off him? Get it together, lust-riddled brain. Whatever this attraction was, it couldn’t happen again. No matter how amazing he felt on top of me.
I jumped into the lazy lake water, and the mud came off in chunks. The memory of the kiss and all the fire? Well, that wasn’t going to go away so easily.
The water was still cold in June. Tree cover and no days over eighty degrees meant chattering teeth, goose bumps, and way too much shivering, but not in the sexy way.
We ran our asses over to the communal showers. After several minutes of silence, I wondered how we were going to break this tension between us. The warm water washed the remaining mud away, thank goodness. I was just starting to relax when Jack’s voice ruined all chances of that happening.
“You know, getting dirty looks good on you, princess,” Jack commented from the stall next to mine. So he was going to lean into teasing me about this situation? Great.
I gave him a hearty, “Go fuck yourself, Jack.” I could just picture his smile from the other side of the wall.
“Mmm, tempting. But I bet it’s you who needs some relief. That imagination of yours is probably running rampant, isn’t it?”
Ugh. This man.
“Are you projecting your need to relieve yourself or something?” I lathered my hair with the provided haircare products and tried not to sound as curious as I was for his answer.
“Stop deflecting. I couldn’t help but notice the way you undressed me at the lake over there.”
“First of all, you undressed yourself. Secondly, for your information, no, I am not imagining anything else. That kiss was more than enough, thank you very much.”
He huffed a laugh. “Enough? Really? Because from where I stand, it seemed like you wanted more.”
Was I that transparent? I needed the upper hand back and fast. His cockiness was stifling. His ego needed a reality check.
“In your dreams. I’ve got you clocked, Hawthorne. You’re probably one of those dudes who’s selfish in bed.” I wrapped a towel around myself tightly and stepped out of the shower to grab another towel off the shelf for my hair.
Jack exited the shower, also in nothing but a towel, and his face met mine in the mirror. “You need me to prove how incorrect you are, princess? If you’d like, I can spell it out with my tongue.”
I couldn’t speak. My mouth was dry. And if I wasn’t thinking about it before… well, now I couldn’t stop thinking about it.
He seemed to realize he’d stolen my sanity as he lightly tapped his chin, a reminder to close my gaping lips. Then the asshole winked at me. That snapped me out of my stupor.
“In an alternate universe where I was somehow interested in all of… that”—I gestured up and down his body through the mirror—“you’d be the one moaning my name. Not the other way around.”
Jack’s face tilted down at me, and he looked intense, the way he did when just before kissing me, not even an hour ago. “Is that a challenge?” he asked, those burning eyes alive with a spark of rivalry in them.
This was one competition I wanted to have.
He stepped in front of me and cupped my jaw.
Our eyes locked together. Was he going to kiss me again?
I didn’t step away. I just listened, my pulse beating a mile a minute.
Jack was right, as infuriating as that was to admit.
That kiss wasn’t enough. That was a dangerous thought.
Still, I leaned into him and tilted my neck ever so slightly.
But just like with everything, Jack ruined it.
He took a massive step back. “Whoa, what are we doing?” He sounded startled, as if he hadn’t expected this turn of events between us. “This can’t happen again.”
It was as if I’d been doused in a bucket of cold water. “What?”
“We shouldn’t do this.” His face was panicked.
I may have been unlucky in love, but I’d never had this reaction from someone before. “You kissed me just as much as I kissed you. This isn’t all my fault.”
He opened his mouth, but whatever he was about to say was interrupted by a camper wearing flip-flops and a vengeful sunburn. Yikes.
We jumped apart as if we’d been caught doing something wrong. Was this wrong? Yes, it was.
I walked out the door, back to Jack’s cabin, clutching the towel around me for dear life. How stupid. Of course, it couldn’t happen.
Always on my heels, Jack walked with me and tried to talk to me all the way back to his cabin. “Nat, wait up.”
I punched in the door code with ferocity. I didn’t need to hear him reiterate what I already knew. Nearly kissing him again was stupid enough. That kiss was a one-and-done thing. It couldn’t be more. Why had I almost let it happen again?