Chapter 14
FOURTEEN
The planetary configuration makes it likely that you’ll reap the benefits of your hard work. You’ll be tempted to relax. Don’t! Lean in! You can sleep when you’re dead. Kidding! You’ll also need lots of rest to push through, so getting plenty of sleep and eating healthy is more important than ever.
Valley is winning by two at the start of the third period.
Adam stands at the edge of the ice near the bench as the guys file in.
He’s a giant—broad shoulders accentuated by all the padding and the added inches to his already massive height from the skates.
I like how tall and big he is. I feel safe with him.
I didn’t have many male role models in my life (or role models of any gender, actually), so maybe it’s daddy issues that make something like safety seem sexy to me.
I don’t care. Knowing Adam could physically maim someone but is choosing to go into a career where he’ll help people makes him incredibly attractive.
Ginny leans over me to speak. “Heath says they’re going to The Hideout after the game.”
“Don’t they always?” Dakota asks.
The answer to that is yes. Or almost always yes.
“I can’t tonight. I promised Matt I would go with him to their frat formal tomorrow. It’s at a resort a couple of hours away, so we’re leaving early in the morning.”
I huff a laugh. “I love how you say, ‘I promised’ like it’s this casual, friend thing.”
“It’s an overnight date?” Ginny asks.
“No.” Dakota shakes her head, then says, “Yes, it’s overnight, but it’s not a date.”
“She’s wearing her high school prom dress. It’s absolutely a date.” I nudge Dakota and smirk at Ginny.
“Whatever. He’s a guy I know from when I ran track, nothing more. I’m wearing sneakers with the dress. Not a date. We’re just friends, and I’m doing him a solid.”
“When have you ever worn anything but sneakers on a date?” I ask. Dakota rocks a pair of sneakers, but if I ever saw her in heels, I might die of shock.
“Once upon a time, I’m sure. Seriously, just friends. I’ve seen him in running shorts—not interested.”
“Well, I’m in for The Hideout,” I say and link my arm through Ginny’s. I’m in for wherever Adam’s going. I haven’t seen him since very early this morning when he left me in his bed to go to their team skate. And I’ve missed him.
My feelings are moving fast despite us taking things slow. Everything about him makes me happy. It’s hard to ease into something you’ve wanted for eternity.
After a Valley win, Dakota drops Ginny and me at The Hideout. The guys are only a few minutes behind.
Adam wraps me in his arms.
“Congratulations.” I inhale as I rest my head against his chest. He smells like soap, and my mind wanders to the shower we took together two nights ago. My nipples tighten, and my face flushes.
“Thank you.” He pulls back, obviously not lost in dirty fantasies. “I’m going to grab another pitcher.”
Someone claps him on the shoulder to offer their congratulations.
He turns to say thanks, and I stand just behind him.
Ginny’s already planted herself on Heath’s lap, and people are filling up the table we secured.
Adam doesn’t look like he’s going to be able to escape conversation anytime soon, so I leave him to claim a chair.
Rhett drops into the one next to me with a sigh. He places his phone on the table.
“Nice game tonight.”
“Thanks.” He pours a beer and then offers the pitcher to me. “You want a beer?”
“Sure.” I move my glass closer, and he fills it.
I scan for Adam, but don’t see him anymore. The empty seats around us are almost gone.
“Should we save Adam a place to sit?”
“Nah.” He shakes his head. “When he’s ready to sit, he’ll make someone move.”
“Right.” I angle toward Rhett. Without Dakota or Ginny, I feel a little out of place. Which I know is silly, these guys are my friends too, but I rarely interact with them one on one. “How are you doing?”
“Okay.” He shrugs and then runs a hand through his unruly blond hair.
“Have you talked to Carrie?”
“She texted, but I haven’t responded. Adam told me to leave it alone.”
“Can I see?”
He unlocks his phone and slides it to me. My heart breaks for him when I see his contact name for her: Care-Bear with a heart emoji.
That will suck to change.
The last text from her is a freaking novel but basically says she wants to see him in person and talk.
“You don’t want to see her?”
“I’m not going to change my mind. Is extending this out and telling her that in person really going to help anything?”
“I don’t know. She seems to think so.” I hand the phone back. “Can you even take time off to go see her?”
“No. She’d have to come here.”
“I don’t see the problem if she wants to make an effort; let her.”
“You think?”
I second-guess myself. “I’m probably not the one that should be giving advice on this. I’ve had exactly zero serious boyfriends.”
“Really?” His head cocks to the side, and his hair flops over one eye. He pushes it back. “That surprises me. And now you’re dating the guy that only knows serious. Weird how things work out.”
Speaking of Adam, he’s back in view. Standing at the opposite end of the table talking to some guys on the team.
“Why doesn’t Adam think you should see her? Did he say?”
“He never liked Carrie. They got off on the wrong foot freshmen year.”
“Why?” I laugh.
“Oh, it was a mutual dislike. She hated that I was rooming with the campus playboy—obviously that was her word, not mine. He was bringing chicks back to the dorm and—” He stops. “Shit, I’m sorry.”
“I’m well aware that Adam’s dated a lot of girls. It’s fine.”
“Anyway, I guess she was worried he was going to corrupt me or some shit. Adam and I are different. I love him, but…” He doesn’t have to finish that sentence for me to understand.
That’s not who I am either.
“He’s a good guy,” Rhett reassures me.
“I know. I’m a little worried he’s going to get sick of me in a few months, and I’ll lose him and the rest of you.” I laugh it off like I don’t believe it, but it’s a real concern.
“Never gonna happen.” He lifts his glass and waits for me to do the same, then clinks them together. “You’re stuck with us, Rea.”
As the night goes on, I chat with Rhett and Maverick, and a bunch of other hockey guys. Ginny pries herself away from Heath to hang for a while, too. The only person I don’t spend any time with is Adam.
He bounces all around the bar. He catches my eye once or twice and smiles, but otherwise we don’t interact.
I’m having a great time, but something feels off with him. Maybe he’s already sick of me. I don’t generally worry about coming off as clingy, but we do share all the same friends, so maybe this is him trying to make space? The later it gets, the more I worry that might be true.
“Where’s Adam?” Ginny asks as she and Heath get ready to leave the bar.
I nod in his direction.
“Is everything okay? I haven’t seen you two together all night.” Ginny’s brows pull together. “Do I need to get Heath to kick Adam’s ass?”
“Hey, now. Let’s not get your boyfriend into any fights tonight,” Heath says from behind her.
“No need for violence. We’re fine.” At least I think we are.
“Do you want us to stick around for a little while longer?” Ginny asks. Heath does not look stoked about that, but he nods his head in agreement. He’d jump through fire if Ginny asked.
“No, you don’t need to stay,” I say with a small laugh. I catch Adam’s eye, and he smiles. I’m making too big a deal of this. “You two go home. I’m fine. We’re good. Seriously,” I add with a little pep to my tone.
Ginny puts her arms around my neck and hugs me. “Love you. I’ll talk to you tomorrow.”
When they’re gone, I weave through the still-packed bar to reach Adam.
“Hi.” I step up beside him.
“Hey.” His arm goes around my waist and then quickly drops. He stands tall. “Having fun?”
“Yeah, but I think I’m just about funned out. Heath and Ginny left, and I think I’m going to go too.”
“Oh, really? Already?”
I can’t read the expression on his face. Disappointment? But he’s made no effort to talk to me tonight, so that can’t be right.
“Yeah. I’m tired. It’s been quite the week.”
“Okay, well, there’s still a few guys out, so I’m going to stay and make sure everyone gets home before curfew.”
“Right. Of course. Do you want me to wait?”
“No, go home and get some sleep.” He pulls me to him for a quick embrace. I pause, expecting him to say he’ll call or see me later, but he doesn’t.
“O-kay.”
Briefly, his lips brush against mine, and then someone calls his name.
With an annoyed groan, he says, “Later, beautiful.”
I take a step toward the door on wobbly legs. “Later, Adam.”
But he’s already dismissed me and is talking to someone else. I’m more embarrassed than angry. Embarrassed that I showed up and made myself so available. Embarrassed I assumed he wanted me there.
I hurry out to the parking lot in time to catch up with Ginny and Heath. He’s got her pinned against the passenger side door, kissing her so hard I have tingles.
I stare at the ground. “Uhh, hey, is it still okay if I catch a ride back to the apartment with you guys?”
Heath pulls away so reluctantly I want to laugh. Ginny’s head comes into view. She’s flushed, and her hair is a little messy. “Of course. We were waiting to see if you’d change your mind.”
“We were?” Heath asks.
Ginny shakes her head at him and moves to open the car door, forcing Heath back. He tips his head toward the car in invitation, and I hop in.
When we get back to the apartment complex, Ginny looks at me with sad eyes as Heath opens his apartment door. “Call or text if you need anything.”
“I’m fine. Everything is great. I’m just tired.”
I change clothes but don’t go to sleep. Sitting in front of the TV, I hold my phone in my hand. I consider texting Adam, but I have no idea what to say.
Being disappointed because we didn’t hang out, after an entire week of hanging out almost nonstop, seems a little pathetic. It’s really my expectations that need adjusting. We spent so much time together this week, and I thought it’d be the same tonight. No big deal.
But my stomach cramps, and I feel gross all over because I know Adam. I’ve seen him with so many different girls that I know his playbook by heart. Hanging out after a game at The Hideout is definitely part of that playbook. So is leaving with said girl.
I’m still awake when they get back. Our apartments aren’t exactly great at blocking outside noise, plus let’s be honest, I’m listening for him. I give it five minutes, and then I text him, Can I come over?
While I wait for his response, I think back on the night. I can’t shake this uneasy feeling that something isn’t right even though he hasn’t really done anything wrong.
His response chases away some of my doubts, Absolutely.
The living room is dark as I enter. Adam’s bedroom door is open. He’s changed into sweatpants and is pulling a T-shirt over his head.
“Hey.” He smiles when he sees me.
I linger in the doorway as he gets ready for bed. It isn’t until he’s pulling back the sheets that he realizes I haven’t moved.
“Everything okay?” he asks.
“I’m not sure. I have this weird feeling like I did something wrong?”
“What?” His expression tells me I clearly caught him off guard. “Why would you think that?”
“It’s just that I barely saw you all night. I was hoping we’d be able to hang out. I realize how ridiculous that sounds, but I know you. I know how you are when you’re dating someone you really like.”
“Reagan,” he starts.
I wave a hand in front of my face, embarrassment making me flustered. “No, I think I’m going to go. This was a bad idea. It’s been a long week, and you have a game tomorrow. We can talk about this later. Everything is great. ?Night, Adam.”
He’s in front of me, blocking my exit before I get to the front door.
“I don’t think so,” he says, and picks me up and carries me back to his bedroom. “We’ll talk about this now.”