Chapter 7
PIPER
"Ve don't use that vord." Babushka wrinkled her nose. "Come, Zachary. You are late for dinner."
"Nobody invited me to dinner," Zach said, still standing in the doorway looking between Piper, Shelby, and his grandmother with an expression that suggested he was calculating exactly how much damage had already been done.
"Nonsense. Family alvays invited," Babushka declared. "Sit. Eat. We discuss vedding."
Piper shot him what she hoped was a desperate look. His eyes met hers briefly, and the sympathetic quirk of his mouth sent an unexpected flutter through her chest.
"Babushka," Zach sighed, stepping inside and closing the door behind him. His arm brushed against Piper's as he passed, the warmth lingering on her skin. "How did you even find Piper's apartment?"
"I have my vays," Babushka replied mysteriously, then immediately added, "Anna gave me the address. Said you might be here, too. Since you've mentioned your fondness for the pretty vedding planner many, many times."
Piper's cheeks warmed as Shelby's eyebrows migrated right up toward her hairline. The idea that Zach talked about her made her pulse go faster.
"I mentioned she is organized," Zach said quickly, giving Piper an apologetic look. "And good at her job."
"Like good Russian vorkhorse," Babushka announced.
He winced.
"Horse?" Piper repeated flatly.
"Is compliment," Babushka assured her. "Strong, proud, reliable. Not like lazy American ponies."
The not-usually cramped space of her apartment suddenly felt stifling.
"Zachary says you vill make perfect vedding for Anna and Drake," Babushka continued, patting the chair next to her. "Sit."
Zach started to sit but Babushka pulled the chair closer at the last second, nearly landing him on the carpet instead.
"Too close to corner," Babushka patted his shoulder. "Sitting at corner of the table—brings seven years vithout marriage."
"It's a silly superstition," Zach assured, sliding his chair closer to Piper's. Close enough that their knees touched under the table. Piper didn't move away, surprising even herself.
"This is problem," Babushka said firmly. "Ve need Russian traditions for proper marriage."
"I don't think—" Piper tried.
"My husband and I vere so much in love for sixty-two years until he decided to die," Babushka said. "You know vhy? Traditional ceremony."
Piper had no idea what to say to that, so she said, "My parents had a traditional ceremony the first time. It didn't stop them from divorcing when my dad decided to try yoga with the instructor in her bedroom. My mother sank his fishing boat in revenge."
Shelby choked on her stew. "You never told me about the boat."
"Not my go-to party story," Piper said entirely too chipper and painfully aware of Zach studying her with new interest.
Babushka recovered quickly. "For Anna, ve need doves. At least twelve."
"Absolutely not," Piper said firmly, sitting straighter. This was her professional territory, and animals were a hard stop. "They're unpredictable, they make a mess, and half the outdoor venues in Denver have restrictions against bird releases."
Rather than being offended, Babushka seemed pleased by Piper's pushback. "Good. You have backbone. Important for vedding planner. Vhat about vodka fountain?"
"Insurance nightmare," Piper replied automatically.
"Tablitsa Sud'by, then," Babushka countered.
"What's that?" Shelby asked.
"Traditional Dvornakov custom. The Table of Fate vhere ve seat all single friends for potential romance."
"That's actually not a terrible idea," Piper admitted, her mind already arranging seating charts. "It's essentially targeted seating arrangements. I can agree to that one."
"See?" Babushka beamed triumphantly at Zach. "She understands tradition. This is vhy I come to help."
Zach, who had been watching this exchange with a mixture of horror and fascination, finally found his voice. "Babushka, I'm sure Piper appreciates your input, but she has a process—"
"Process." Babushka scoffed. "Marriage is not process. It is a journey."
"The journey requires a roadmap," Piper insisted. "And in this case, the bride and groom create the plan."
"Vith guidance from vise elders," Babushka added.
"And the Stallions football team," Zach added.
Piper looked at Zach again, a silent plea for intervention she hoped to hell he understood.
"Babushka," Zach said gently. "Piper is very good at what she does. This is Anna and Drake's day."
"Pah. Young people need guidance," Babushka declared. She turned to Shelby, "You have good energy. Creative spirit." She gestured at Piper, "This one, she'll loosen up."
"That's what I keep telling her." Shelby agreed enthusiastically.
"I'm perfectly loose," Piper protested, painfully conscious of Zach's amusement.
The synchronized skeptical looks from all three of the others made her slightly reconsider that stance. "I mean, I'm appropriately flexible when the situation calls for it."
Zach's eyebrow raised slightly, and the hint of a smile playing at his lips made her face grow warm again.
"Like ved—" Babushka started.
"Like professional situations," Piper cut in, seizing the opportunity, "Actually, I do need your help. We're trying to find some edible glitter suppliers for the wedding cake. We need a… a very specific color. Zach mentioned something about your connections?"
Babushka's eyes lit up. "Ah. You want svyataya iskra. The holy spark. Very important. Brings prosperity to the marriage."
"It's not actually traditional," Zach clarified. "Babushka just loves anything that sparkles."
"Is beautiful, like stars in night sky," Babushka insisted. "Marriage needs little sparkle, yes? Do not vorry. I know who to call. Ve vill go tomorrow to see him."
"I can't. I'm accompanying Anna and Drake to see the potential venue tomorrow." She looked pointedly at Babushka. "Only the three of us, as planned."
"Vhat venue?" Babushka asked.
"The Falcon Hotel downtown," Piper answered before she could stop herself. "They have a rooftop terrace with mountain views."
Babushka's eyes lit up. "Perfect. I'll be there."
"That's not necessary—" Piper began.
"I insist," Babushka said firmly. "Russian mother of bride must approve venue. I'll bring Anna's mother."
"That won't work. I already have meetings scheduled there with another event," Piper said firmly. "Then I'm meeting Drake and Anna."
"Vhat event?" Babushka demanded.
"The D.I.C.K.?" Shelby asked innocently.
Zach choked while Shelby dissolved into giggles.
"It's the Directors of Interment and Cremation Knowledge," Piper clarified hastily. "And it's a completely respectable industry committee for funeral directors."
"Ah, yes. I know this group. Good people—except for Mortimer. I have things to say to that man. Lots of things." Babushka's expression darkened.
"Is that Morty? Your ex-boyfriend?" Zach asked. "Pistol Polly's Morty?"
"Pistol Polly's Morty?" Piper asked. Pistol Polly's was a local gentleman's club known for their massive steak and topless dancers.
"Story for another day." Zach shivered. "Ask Jase and Heather. They'll tell you."
"Yes. Morty." Babushka flicked her fingers and let out a sharp pfft. "If I see him, he vill run. And I vill catch him."
Piper resolved never to mention Mr. Thornhill—Morty—to Babushka ever again. Or allow them to be in the same room together.
"Are you certain you vant funeral directors at a vedding venue?" Babushka looked skeptical.
"It's a multi-purpose event space," Piper explained. "I'll be there for their meeting, and then I can check the terrace for Anna and Drake while I'm already on site. It's efficient."
"I like efficiency," Babushka nodded approvingly. "Though vedding and funeral in same place is not good luck. Not custom."
"It's a different floor," Piper assured her. "And churches co-mingle the two on the regular."
"Still, ve should see this place," Babushka insisted. "Make sure it has proper energy."
Before Piper could protest, Zach jumped in, his knee pressing more firmly against hers. "Actually, Babushka, I was hoping you could help me at the shop tomorrow. I've got a new design that's giving me trouble."
Babushka looked torn. "You never vant my help."
"I always want your help," Zach disagreed solemnly. "I need your eye for detail." He turned to Piper. "She's the one who taught me to sew to begin with."
Piper could have kissed him for the rescue. Not that she wanted to kiss him. Obviously.
"I cannot help you," Babushka said. "Tess is checking venue also for security and broadcast restrictions tomorrow. She told me vhen she invited your mother. Vhich means I come, too. I hope I see Morty vhile ve are there."
Piper and Zach exchanged alarmed glances.
"Morty aside, how do you know Tess?" Piper asked, trying to keep her voice level.
"How do I know anything? It's vhat I do," Babushka shrugged. "She says she must approve all locations for publicity reasons and security reasons and lots of other reasons. I stopped listening."
"Babushka?" Zach prodded. "How do you know her, though?"
"Her grandmother is Peggy. Ve are friends." Babushka brushed a stray crumb off the tablecloth.
"Well, that's cozy, isn't it." Piper pursed her lips. How many more ways would her personal and professional life tangle until she couldn't tell where one ended and the other began?
"When is Tess planning to check the venue?" Zach asked.
"Tomorrow afternoon. Same time as your meeting with Drake and Anna. This is all very simple, really. You're complicating things vith questions."
Piper's mind raced. She'd specifically slotted this time to hear Anna and Drake's ideas without the noise of everyone else.
"I could go with you," Zach offered suddenly, his voice dropping lower as he leaned closer.
The offer hung in the air between them.
The thought of having him there, on her side playing defense? She could use his assistance.
"That's actually a good idea," Piper admitted.
"I have them occasionally," Zach replied in a way that made Piper believe he wasn't talking about weddings or venues or any of that.
Oh. Okay, then.
"I want you to succeed," he said simply, in a voice meant only for her.
"Then it's settled," Babushka watched the exchange with obvious interest, her eyes darting between them. "Yes, good plan. Ve all go."
"We all go," Zach agreed.
"Now, dessert." Babushka clapped her hands together. "I bring ptichye moloko."
"Bird's milk," Zach translated. "It's a souffle cake."
"Sounds amazing," Shelby said enthusiastically, standing to help Babushka.
As they bustled to the kitchen, Zach leaned closer to Piper.
"I'm sorry about this," he whispered. "She's a force of nature."
"I noticed," Piper replied. "Is your entire family this invasive?"
"Afraid so. Anna and I are actually the calm ones."
"Oh," Piper muttered.
"Look on the bright side," Zach offered, his voice low and surprisingly kind. "At least Babushka likes you."
"How can you tell?"
"She fed you," he said simply. "Babushka only feeds people she approves of."
Despite herself, Piper experienced a small glow of satisfaction.
"And for what it's worth," Zach added, his voice dropping, "I never compared you to a horse. But I did tell Anna that you're the most competent person I've ever met. Also, one of the most stubborn."
"Is that a compliment?" Piper asked, suddenly very aware of how close they were sitting.
Their eyes met, and something in his gaze made her breath catch.
"Definitely," he replied, his fingers lightly brushing against hers again. "I enjoy knowing where I stand with someone."
"And where do you stand with me?" The words slipped out before she could stop them.
"I'm standing right here." Zach's smile turned thoughtful.
Babushka returned with dessert before Piper could respond. The stark white confection trembled slightly as she set it down, and, holy crap, Piper drew in a sharp breath. That dessert one-hundred thousand percent was shaped like a penis.
"Eat," Babushka commanded, slicing off the tip. "Then ve talk more about vedding, yes?"