Chapter 11
Cricket Jenkins
River walks me to my door, and my heart beats loud in my ears. I’m new to dating, but I know what happens when your date brings you to your door. I swallow my nerves, unsure of what I’ll do if River tries to kiss me.
I haven’t kissed anyone before. Well, my parents, but that doesn’t count. I haven’t kissed a guy. And I had kind of hoped my first kiss would be with Micah. Dreamed about it is more like it. And if I kiss River, that totally blows it for me.
River stops and turns to me. My spit dries up as he gazes into my eyes. He smiles. He is so good-looking. I should be happier about being on the doorstep with him, but my insides twist and I can’t smile back.
“I had fun tonight,” he says, his voice low and whispery.
I nod a little too enthusiastically. “Me too.”
One eyebrow raises. “I have my audition tomorrow. If it goes well, do you want to go out and celebrate with me?”
Do I? Of course I do. I like River. I repeat it in my head as I nod. “Sure.”
River leans a little closer to me, and my heart stops. Is he going to kiss me? I’m not ready. Should I start coughing? Fake a period cramp? Lose a contact? What am I thinking? I wear glasses.
Thankfully, he stops coming closer, but his gaze travels over me. “How old are you?”
I was not expecting that question. “Eighteen. Why?”
He slowly nods and steps back. “You seem nervous. I’m not going to do anything you don’t want me to, Cricket.”
Relief floods through me as I let out a high-pitched giggle. “Sorry, I’m new to all this.” My hands fly back and forth indicating the two of us, but then I realize that doesn’t say what I want it to. “Dating. That’s what I mean.”
He smiles at me. “I see.”
“H-how old are you?” I ask, trying to keep it together. This is not going as I had imagined my first date would.
“Twenty-two. Does that bother you?”
I shake my head, doing the math. “My dad is five years older than my mom, so a whole year older than you are to me.” After the words are out, I realize how that sounds, and I choke.
“Not that we’d get married. I didn’t mean…
Although Diane knows we want toilet-shaped salt and pepper shakers if we ever do decide to… ” Embarrassment heats my face.
River lets out a huge laugh. “That was so much fun. Thanks for playing along.”
“I enjoyed it too.” Thinking back on it, I had a lot of fun with River when Micah wasn’t on my mind. I really should forget about Micah and try harder with River.
I step closer to him, gaining more confidence. “So, tomorrow, then? We’ll go celebrate if you have a great audition.”
“We can go anywhere you’d like.”
I furrow my brow in mock confusion. “But what if you don’t have a good audition?”
He acts shocked. “Ouch. You doubt me?”
“No. I’m just covering all the bases.”
He grins. “Well, if things don’t go well, I get to pick where we go to make me feel better for botching the audition.”
I can’t hold in my smile. Either way, we get a date. “All right.”
He reaches his hand out and curls a strand of my hair over my ear. The gentle touch sends a shiver through me, and I don’t pull away. His fingers linger near my face, and I feel my nervousness starting to melt away.
“You’re really beautiful, Cricket,” he says softly. “I hope you know that.”
My cheeks warm. No one has ever told me that before. “Thank you.”
“And smart. The way you talked about your writing tonight… you have such passion for it. I know I said this before, but I’d love to read some of your work sometime.”
My heart flutters. He actually wants to read my writing. “You’re not just saying that?”
“Of course not. I bet you’re incredibly talented.” His thumb brushes against my cheek.
I lean into his touch, feeling more relaxed than I have all evening. Maybe this could work. Maybe if I kiss him, I can get over Micah.
“I had a really good time tonight,” I whisper.
“So did I.” He steps closer, and this time I don’t panic. “Cricket?”
“Yeah?”
“I’d really like to kiss you. Is that okay?”
My heart hammers, but I nod. I want to get over Micah. I want to try with River. And maybe if I kiss him, I’ll finally understand what all the fuss is about.
I close my eyes and tilt my face up toward his. I can feel his breath on my lips, feel him leaning down—
The front door flies open with a bang.
“How did the date go?”
I jump backward so fast I nearly trip over my own feet. River straightens, looking startled.
Micah stands in the doorway, his hair sticking up in twelve different directions like he’s been running his hands through it all evening. His eyes dart between River and me, and I’m sure he noticed how close we were standing.
“Micah!” I say, my voice coming out higher than normal. “What are you doing?”
“I heard you guys talking and thought…” He trails off, looking embarrassed. “I wanted to make sure you got home safe.”
River clears his throat. “She did. Safe and sound.”
An awkward silence stretches among the three of us. I can feel the tension radiating off Micah, though I’m not sure why he looks so agitated.
River turns to me and takes my hand, lifting it to his lips. He presses a gentle kiss to my knuckles, his eyes never leaving mine. “Thank you for a wonderful evening, Cricket. I’ll call you tomorrow after my audition.”
I swoon. It’s like something straight out of Pride and Prejudice—so elegant and romantic and gentlemanly. “That sounds perfect.”
River nods politely at Micah. “Good to see you again.”
“Yeah,” Micah mutters, though he doesn’t sound like he means it.
River walks to his car, and I watch him go with a dreamy smile on my face. When I turn back to Micah, he’s glaring at River’s retreating figure.
“What was that about?” I ask as we go inside.
“What was what about?”
“You bursting through the door like the house was on fire.”
Micah shrugs and closes the door behind us. “I was just checking on you. It’s late.”
“It’s nine-thirty.”
“Exactly. Late.”
I roll my eyes and head toward the stairs. “It’s a perfectly normal time to come home from a date. You’ve come home later than that on your dates,” I mutter.
“So, how was it?” Micah follows me, and I can tell he’s not going to let this go. “Did you go anywhere else besides the restaurant and the beach? What did you talk about? Did you have fun?”
“Yes, I had fun. We didn’t go anywhere else.” I stop at the bottom of the stairs and turn to face him. “Why are you interrogating me?”
“I’m not interrogating you. I’m curious about my best friend’s first real date, that’s all.”
The way he says “first real date” makes me defensive. “It was great, okay? River is really sweet and thoughtful.”
“Thoughtful how?”
“He asked about my writing. He wants to read some of my work.”
Something flickers across Micah’s face. “He does?”
“Yes. And he listened when I talked about it. Really listened.” I head upstairs to my room, and Micah follows me. “He’s going to call me tomorrow after his audition to make plans for another date.”
“Another date? Already?”
“Yes, Micah. That’s what people do when they like each other.” I grab my laptop from my desk. “They go on multiple dates.”
“What’s the laptop for?”
“I’m going to email River some of my writing.”
Micah is quiet for a moment then asks, “Like what? That book you’re working on?”
“Yes, I’m sending him a few chapters.” I plop down on my bed.
He’s standing awkwardly in my doorway, shoulders hunched. “You’ve never let me read any of your writing.”
I pause in opening my laptop and look at him. “You’ve never asked.”
“I… what do you mean I’ve never asked?”
“I mean exactly that. In all the years I’ve been writing, you’ve never once asked to read anything I’ve written. You’ve never shown any interest in it at all.”
Micah’s face falls. “That’s not… I mean, I knew you liked to write, but…”
“But you never cared enough to ask about it.” The words come out sharper than I intended, but they’re true. “River spent half the evening asking me about my stories and what inspires me and about all my favorite authors. You’ve known me for years, and you’ve never asked me any of those things.”
“I care,” Micah says quietly. “About your writing.”
Emotion rises in my throat. “Then why have you never asked to read it?”
He runs his hand through his hair, making it stick up even more. “I don’t know. I guess I thought… I mean, if you wanted me to read it, you would have offered.”
I blink back tears, which surprises me. I didn’t realize how much it hurt me that Micah’s never paid attention to my work. “I was waiting for you to show some interest. To ask. To care enough to be curious about this huge part of my life. Whenever you write a song, I always ask to hear it.”
The hurt in my voice seems to hit him, because his expression changes to something almost stricken.
“Cricket, I…” He takes a step closer. “I would love to read your work. I’ve always wanted to, I just didn’t know how to ask. I was worried you’d think I was being nosey or something.”
I study his face, trying to determine if he’s sincere or just saying what he thinks I want to hear.
“Really?”
“Really. Can I? Read something, I mean?”
I look down at my laptop then back at him. “Which would you rather read, some of my short stories or part of my novel?”
“What’s your novel about?”
“It’s…” I hesitate, realizing how this is going to sound. “It’s a romance novel. Friends to lovers. Kind of a silly trope, really. You might not want to read it.”
Micah goes very still. “Oh.”
“The short stories might be better,” I say quickly.
“No,” he says, his voice soft. “I want to read the novel. If you’re comfortable sharing it.”
I stare at him, surprised by the intensity in his voice. He’s reaching out, and I can’t say no. “Okay. I’ll email the first few chapters to you.”
“Thank you.” He moves toward the door then pauses. “Cricket? I’m sorry I never asked before. That was… that was really thoughtless of me.”
My throat gets tight, and I have a hard time looking at him. I can’t say anything for fear it will sound funny.
“Your writing is important to you, which means it should be important to me too.” He meets my eyes. “I promise to do better.”
After he leaves, I sit on my bed with my laptop, staring at the document that contains my novel. The story of a woman hopelessly in love with her oblivious best friend.
I wonder what Micah will think when he reads it. Will he recognize himself in the male character? Will he figure out that every word is about him?