Chapter Twenty-Two
Katrina
Of course he would be here. I should have known better. Jack was an officer of the club; he would have Thanksgiving here. His family would be here.
So, Derek would be here.
And now I had to keep Frankie away from him until I’d had a chance to talk to him. Until I knew for certain whether Frankie’s speculation was right, that Derek was the unidentified man who’d saved Hannah and then almost killed Richard.
Maggie agreed with her.
I didn’t want to admit it, but the circumstantial evidence was overwhelming. Everything pointed toward Frankie’s conclusion being right. But why would he do it? We meant nothing to him.
Unless...
I peeked across the room. Derek sat at a table with Jack and Sam, holding one of their twins against his shoulder, rubbing the baby’s back as he talked to his brother. He looked like a natural. A man comfortable with a baby in his arms. A man who belonged there.
My throat tightened.
The baby’s tiny hand curled against Derek’s chest, and something inside me shattered.
I would never be able to give him that.
The realization hit me like a physical blow.
I hadn’t thought about not being able to have children in a very long time, but seeing Derek holding that baby, seeing how natural he looked, how right, reminded me that he didn’t have children.
And aside from being Frankie’s stepfather, I could never give him one of his own.
Never.
The word echoed in my head, cruel and final.
Tears welled up in my eyes, and I blinked them back furiously. This was ridiculous. Derek and I weren’t even together. We’d kissed once. That was it. And yet here I was, mourning the loss of something I could never give him, something he’d never even asked for.
When his eyes caught mine across the room, I turned away quickly, feeling the heat on my cheeks at being caught staring.
“I saw that,” Maggie whispered with a chuckle.
“There was nothing to see,” I hissed back.
“Just go talk to him.”
“I can’t talk to him here.” Was she crazy? We were in an MC clubhouse with who knew how many people. There was absolutely no privacy.
“Sure you can. The bathroom is right down that hall.” She tried to point without being conspicuous, but Frankie turned to see what she was pointing at.
She turned back to face us and asked, “What are you pointing at?”
“Your mom was wondering where the bathroom was. Sam told me it was right down that hall,” Maggie answered quickly.
“Do you want me to go with you?” Frankie asked, smirking. “You know, for moral support?”
“No, smart ass.”
I stood up and threw my shoulders back. I could do this. Just stop at his table and ask if I could speak with him. We were both adults.
Maggie winked at me, and Frankie smiled as if she knew Maggie had been lying through her teeth.
You can do this.
Just walk up to the table, say hello and...
My feet carried me forward before I could talk myself out of it. The room seemed to narrow, the noise fading into background static. All I could see was Derek. All I could feel was the pounding of my heart against my ribs.
What if he said yes? What if he admitted he’d beaten Richard half to death?
What if he didn’t?
What did it say about me that I was terrified of both answers?
I reached the table faster than I realized I would, and suddenly my words were stuck in my throat. I stared down at him, at the baby in his arms, at his dark blue eyes looking up at me with an intensity that made my knees weak.
He wasn’t just looking at me. He was seeing me. Seeing straight through every wall I’d built, every defense I’d erected.
And he was pleading with me.
I didn’t know what he was pleading for. Understanding, maybe? Forgiveness?
Did he know that I suspected what he’d done?
“Everything okay, Kat?” Jack asked.
My eyes snapped to Jack’s. His held amusement, and I quickly looked over my shoulder at Maggie, who shooed me with her hands as if she thought that was encouraging.
Maybe friends weren’t worth it after all. It was her fault I was standing here beside Derek, the man I found obscenely attractive, the man who made my pulse race and my thoughts scatter, the man I suspected might have beaten my ex-husband within an inch of his life.
The man I was terrified I was falling for.
When I turned back to Derek, he was handing the baby over to Jack. He stood up in front of me, and suddenly he was too close. Too tall. Too intense.
His hand settled on my arm, and an electric current shot through me immediately. My instinct was to pull away, but I couldn’t move. I stood frozen under his touch, under the weight of his gaze.
“Can we talk?” I blurted out.
Derek didn’t answer right away. He stared into my eyes, and I would have given anything at that moment to know what he was thinking. But I could see it in the set of his jaw, in the way his fingers tightened just slightly on my arm.
He knew.
He knew what I was going to ask.
Jack stuffed something into Derek’s hand and said with a grin, “Use my office. Third door on the right.”
Derek’s hand slid down my arm to my wrist, his fingers wrapping around it possessively. He didn’t pull me. He didn’t have to. I followed him down the hall, my heart hammering so hard that I was sure everyone in the room could hear it.
He found the door quickly and pushed the key into the lock. The click of the lock disengaging felt loud in the hallway, even though we could still hear the music from the main room.
The door swung open, and I hesitated.
This was it. Once I walked through that door, there was no going back. I would know the truth. And the truth would change everything.
I closed my eyes, trying to gather my strength. My feet shuffled inside, and I turned as Derek closed the door behind him.
We were alone.
Just like in the bathroom of the restaurant.
Only this time, there was no woman hiding in a stall. This time, it was just us. And the weight of everything unsaid between us.
Neither of us moved. We stood there in Jack’s office, staring at each other, both afraid to speak first.
The last time we were close enough to talk was in the diner when he’d stormed off after I told him what Richard had done to Frankie.
“Do you blame me?”
His brow furrowed in confusion. “Blame you for what?” he asked.
“For what happened to Frankie,” I replied. “Because I didn’t keep her safe.”
“Fuck no, Kat.” He ran a hand through his hair. “Richard is the one to blame. He’s the motherfucker who hurt you both.”
“Did you do it?” I blurted out.
The words hung in the air between us, sharp and accusing.
Derek’s face paled.
“Did you hurt Richard?”
His jaw tightened. For a moment, I thought he might deny it. Might lie to me. Might tell me I was crazy for even thinking it.
But then his eyes dropped to the floor, and he nodded.
The breath left my lungs in a rush.
“Why?” I asked, my voice barely above a whisper. I moved closer, drawn to him even as my mind screamed at me to run. “Why would you do that?”
His eyes lifted and looked into mine. The intensity of his gaze made my knees weak.
“He deserved it,” Derek said, his voice low and rough. “He hurt Frankie.” He took a step closer, closing the distance between us until I could feel the heat radiating off his body. “He hurt you.”
“But—”
He put his finger over my lips, silencing me. The touch sent a shiver down my spine.
“He hurt you both,” Derek said, his voice dropping even lower. “And he was hurting those girls. Hannah. Her sisters. He was a fucking predator, Kat. And I wasn’t going to let him get away with it any longer.”
I closed my eyes tight, not wanting to face his revelation. Not wanting to accept what I’d already guessed was happening. My eyes opened again, unshed tears making my vision blurry.
“But why?” I asked, my voice breaking. “Frankie thinks you did it because you love us.”
Derek’s hand reached up and tucked a piece of hair that had come loose behind my ear. Then he cupped my jaw, his thumb brushing over my cheekbone.
“Frankie’s a smart kid,” he said softly. “Just like her mom.”
“You barely know us,” I whispered. “We’ve never even spent any time together.”
His thumb traced my bottom lip, and my breath hitched.
“I know everything I need to know,” Derek said.
And then he kissed me.
It wasn’t like the kiss in the restaurant. That had been desperate and frantic and fueled by anger and jealousy.
This was different.
This was a claiming.
His mouth moved over mine with a possessiveness that made my knees buckle. His hand slid from my jaw to the back of my neck, holding me in place as he deepened the kiss. His other hand gripped my hip, pulling me flush against him.
I could feel every hard line of his body pressed against mine. Could feel the evidence of his desire pressing into my stomach. Could feel the way his heart was pounding just as hard as mine.
I should have pulled away. Should have told him to stop. Should have reminded him that we were in Jack’s office, that anyone could walk in, that this was insane.
But I didn’t.
Instead, I kissed him back with everything I had. My hands fisted in his shirt, pulling him closer. My body arched into his, seeking more contact, more heat, more of him.
Derek groaned into my mouth, and the sound sent a bolt of heat straight to my core.
His hands were everywhere, sliding down my back, gripping my ass, pulling me tighter against him. He walked me backward until my back hit the wall, and then his body was pinning me there, his hips grinding against mine in a way that made me gasp.
“Kat,” he breathed against my lips. “Tell me to stop.”
“No,” I whispered.
His eyes darkened. “Tell me you don’t want this.”
“I can’t.”
“Tell me you don’t want me.”
“I can’t,” I said again, my voice breaking. “I can’t, Derek. I—”
He kissed me again, harder this time. More demanding. His tongue swept into my mouth, claiming me, owning me, making it clear that there was no going back from this.
His hand slid under my sweater, his palm hot against my skin. He cupped my breast through my bra, his thumb brushing over my nipple, and I moaned into his mouth.
“Fuck,” Derek muttered against my lips. “You’re so fucking beautiful.”
His hand moved to the button of my jeans, and my breath caught.
“Derek,” I whispered. “Someone could—”
“I don’t care,” he said, his voice rough. “I need you, Kat. Right now. I need to be inside you.”
His words sent a shiver down my spine. I should have been shocked. Should have been scandalized. Should have told him we couldn’t do this here.
But all I could think about was how much I wanted him. How much I needed him. How much I’d been fighting this for weeks, and I was so tired of fighting.
“Yes,” I breathed. “Yes, Derek. Please.”
That was all the permission he needed.
In one fluid motion, Derek bent and lifted me into his arms. I gasped, wrapping my legs around his waist instinctively as he carried me across the office. Derek swept everything off Jack’s desk with one arm: papers, pens, a coffee mug, all clattering to the floor.
He laid me back on the cool wooden surface, his body covering mine, his mouth never leaving my skin.
He kissed down my neck, my collarbone, pushing my sweater up and over my head.
My bra followed seconds later, and then his mouth was on my breast, his tongue circling my nipple before he sucked it into his mouth.
“Derek,” I moaned, my fingers threading through his hair.
“I want to taste every inch of you,” he growled against my skin. “Every. Fucking. Inch.”
His hands moved to my jeans, unbuttoning them with practiced ease. He pulled them down my legs along with my panties, leaving me completely bare before him on his brother’s desk.
For a moment, Derek just stood there, his eyes raking over my body with such raw hunger that I felt it like a physical touch.
Then, in a rough voice, he commanded, “Spread your legs for me.”