Chapter 11
11
“I like my freedom.” Archer wasn’t sure why he felt the need to defend himself over his dating habits, but his pride couldn’t have Annalee thinking he spent every Saturday night alone.
Were holidays lonely lately? Sure. That was a small price to pay for the other three-hundred-sixty-plus days a year when he was fine being on his own.
“Same,” Annalee said, surprising him with the response. “Plus, you know, with my mother’s track record of getting involved with losers, I figure the best way not to fall into the same trap is to not even go there.”
“Do you date losers?”
“No,” she said, her tone defensive.
“Then, what are you worried about? Are you afraid that you can’t tell the difference?”
“No, it’s not that.” She leaned her head back against the headrest. “All the guys are opening doors for you and bringing flowers…in the beginning.”
“I’m guessing it doesn’t take long for the mystery to fade and you to realize they’re just human beings.”
“Something like that,” she said.
If the walls were going to stay up, he might as well poke at them. “Real relationships aren’t perfect.”
“Is that why you’ve avoided them?” she quipped.
Damned if his tactic didn’t backfire. Annalee had always challenged him on every level and didn’t let him get away with jack. It was one of the many traits he’d loved about her.
Archer laughed. He couldn’t help himself. “Guess we’re cut from the same cloth when it comes to committed relationships.” Although, his thoughts were beginning to change on the subject. He was beginning to see that a relationship might not be the worst idea. Several of his siblings had found the real thing and were happier than he’d ever seen them.
Their abusive father was gone now. Beaumont couldn’t hurt them any longer. Did this mean Archer was considering making the ranch his home? Would making new memories there erase the old ones? For the first time, he could see how that might be possible. How he could make a life in Saddle Junction. Owen was dead set against the idea. His twin planned to stick around long enough to get the place settled. He’d been planning to talk to the others about selling his shares to them so he could start his own thing in another state—Kentucky, he’d thought.
If Owen hadn’t been confused for Archer, his twin would still be making plans for the future.
“We’re getting close to the sheriff’s office,” he said, switching gears so they could come up with a plan. “What do you intend to tell Travis?”
“I haven’t decided.” She twisted her fingers together in her lap. “I want to tell him to back off, but I’m not sure it’s the smartest move. What if he’s close to finding them and can save them?”
“My thoughts, too.”
“Then, there’s the other side that says if I don’t convince Travis to call off the search, our family members might pay the consequences, and it could mean a heavy price.” The guilt of having to make a decision like that could haunt her for the rest of her days. “Which is why I’d like your input. I can’t make this decision on my own, Archer. Not when Owen’s life is at stake, and he didn’t do anything to bring this down on his head, except look like someone I’ve always cared very deeply about.”
Shit. What was he supposed to do with that last part?
Annalee might care, but she was also quick to leave.
Archer would be lying if he tried to say that he didn’t care about her, too. Or that he hadn’t thought of her over the years more times than he could count. Young love was innocent. It was the way you loved before you knew your heart could be ripped out of your chest and that you’d never be the same afterward. You’d never love again in that whole-hearted way again. Scars kept your heart from stretching as far as it once did.
“Asking Travis to hold off might not work,” Archer said, “even if we want him to. He’s a lawman, and he’s been made aware of criminal activity in his county. There’s no undoing that now.”
“What if we beg? Surely, he’d be able to see the potential damage he could cause if he proceeds.”
“He’s intelligent and a damn fine sheriff,” Archer said. “I trust him to make the right decision, to know when to push and when to pull back. If he’s on the fence, however, our thoughts will matter to him more. Owen is his brother-in-law, so this is personal for Travis, too.”
“Guess I hadn’t thought of the situation in those terms,” she said. “Do you have any guesses as to which way he might lean?”
He pulled onto the road that led to the sheriff’s office. “We’re about to find out.”
Chloe’s vehicle wasn’t in the parking lot. Hudson’s Jeep sat in the second visitors’ spot. Archer parked next to it before exiting the driver’s side then made his way around the front to open the door for Annalee. He helped her down from the dual king cab, linked their fingers, and squeezed her hand for support.
She stopped long enough to catch his gaze. “You’ve been amazing throughout this entire ordeal, Archer. You had every right to tell me to go to hell the minute I stepped back into your life, but here you are helping me instead.”
“Believe me when I say that I’m no saint,” he said.
She compressed her lips like she was stopping herself from a quick retort. And then came, “I’m not so sure about that, and I mean that as a compliment.”
“Thinking about the past makes us remember the good in someone. Time colors memories.” He should know. He’d had to force himself to remember her bad qualities, not that there were many. In fact, the ones she had were understandable, given how ugly some of their classmates had been to her. And then there was her home situation to consider… “You’re stronger than you’re giving yourself credit for, Annalee.”
She sucked in a breath. “I’m not so sure about that one. I’m past thirty years old, didn’t go to college, and live in a postage-stamp-sized apartment. I haven’t exactly excelled in life.”
“No? You’ve been through hell and back, all before the age of ten, and it didn’t exactly get better from there.” He glanced down at her thigh where one of her worst scars used to be. A scar that had come from being hit with barbed wire after she’d asked one of her foster families when supper was. Was it still there? He’d mapped those marks on her body in his mind, wishing he could somehow make them better. He’d thought too many times about feathering kisses there again. “You’ve survived and somehow managed not to hate your mother, which pretty much qualifies as sainthood in my book. Plus, you’re still making moves and trying to build a better life.”
“I’ve been running, Archer. I haven’t made a life.”
“You will,” he said with the kind of finality that left no room for her to argue. She might doubt herself but he didn’t. Her mother was one of those life-sucking folks that would suck you dry if you let them. Somehow, Annalee managed to love her mother and never give up hope the woman would change her ways.
Annalee cocked her head to one side. “How can you be so sure?”
“Because you’ll never stop fighting until you get it all figured out. That much I know about you. That much hasn’t changed.”
“You shouldn’t believe in me, Archer.”
“Why not?”
“Because I’ll just disappoint you again.” She dropped her gaze like she couldn’t stand to look him in the eyes when she said those words.
He cupped her chin and lifted her face until their gazes touched once again. “I’ll go to my grave believing in you, Annalee. I’ve never met another person like you, and, believe me, I’ve tried. You’re a better person than you realize, and you deserve to be treated that way—and not by some jerk who will be good to you for five minutes to win your love, only to turn around and kick you in the teeth the minute he gets it. You should be cherished.”
Archer stopped himself right there. He’d said too much, felt too much. And he needed to get his emotions under control again before he said something he’d regret, like he still loved her.
A groundswell of emotion stirred deep in Annalee’s chest. Her lips angled toward his, burning with desire for him to claim her mouth one more time. The kiss they’d shared flooded her with memories and warmth and need. An ache formed in her chest every time the kiss came to mind.
Taking in a deep breath for fortitude, Annalee forced a smile and took a step back. “We should go inside.” Standing this close to Archer while he looked into her eyes was like stepping into the sun for the first time after a long, bitter winter. Stand there too long, and she’d end up with a burn on her exposed skin.
“Okay,” he said, his voice low and gravelly. At least being this close caused a reaction in him, too. A small blip of satisfaction caused her to stand a little straighter. He’d been clear about never kissing again even though the glitter of need in those dark eyes told a different story. If they went on instinct alone and could get outside of their protests, they might be able to have more than a real moment here and there happening between them.
Stepping away had been the right thing to do no matter how much her heart argued as Archer stood there for a long moment like his feet had grown roots and planted him right there. Besides, the storm that had been brewing would be impossible to hold back. At some point, it would break free and decimate her when the rejection came. And it would come. Being rejected by Archer after she’d burned him years ago was as certain as hundred-degree temperatures in August.
Who the hell wanted to volunteer to strip down their defenses and stand in that heat?
Plus, all the words Archer had said to her a few moments ago had washed over her and through her. She wanted to believe him more than anything. Could she? Was she as strong and brave as he believed?
Annalee had always considered herself a fighter. She was getting tired of fighting the world, always swimming against the tide. She was coming to a decision, making up her mind to figure out a way to let life flow instead of forever paddling upstream.
She might not have the first idea how to do it, but that wouldn’t stop her from figuring it out. It was time. Time to get her act together. Time to figure out what she really wanted to do in her work. And time to find a way to lower some of the walls she’d erected so she could let people in. She could count on two hands the number of people who’d invited her to coffee and dinner and to go out to listen to one of the live bands Austin was so famous for.
Friends only tie you down to one place, her mother had repeated over and over again in Annalee’s youth. Best not to get too close. Besides, we’ll always have each other to count on. For as long as she could remember, Annalee had kept everyone at arm’s length. As for the last part, it wasn’t even the tiniest bit true. Annalee couldn’t recall the last time she’d asked her mother for anything. In fact, when she really thought about it, Becca always needed to borrow something; coffee, clothes, cash. The three Cs that defined Annalee and Becca’s relationship.
Walking away from her only relative and cutting Becca off wasn’t an option. One day, when Annalee needed help, her mother would come through. Annalee was certain of the fact. And that day would come. They’d made a pact to be there for each other.
“We should go inside,” Archer said, pulling her back to the present.
Phone in hand, in case another text came through, she followed Archer into the sheriff’s office, was greeted by his assistant, and then taken into his office to wait.
There were football trophies and signed balls inside a glass case on one side of the room. A pair of leather loveseats faced each other with a coffee table in between made of white marble.
The sheriff’s desk was to the left. Two leather club chairs sat across from it. Behind the massive desk stood the Texas flag and the American flag. Directly behind the executive chair, flanked by flags, was a picture of the governor.
Hudson was standing next to the sofas with someone who was the spitting image of Beaumont Sturgess. She knew immediately who he was.
Hudson had a cup of coffee in one hand, but he managed to give a decent hug first to Annalee and then to his brother. “It’s good to see you both.”
“You must be Beau,” Annalee said before offering a handshake.
Beau nodded and took the hand with a polite smile. Archer bear-hugged Hudson and offered a brief, obligatory handshake to Beau. It was clear the half-brothers hadn’t found their footing yet. Beau’s expression came across as open. Not Archer’s. His facial muscles ticked the second he laid eyes on Beau.
“I’m relieved to see you both,” Hudson said. “We’re waiting on Travis.” He motioned for them to take a seat. “I figured out where the break room is. Do you want coffee while we wait?”
“Sounds like manna from heaven,” she said.
Hudson offered a smile. “How do you take yours?”
“Black,” she said.
“Two black coffees coming up.” Hudson set his cup down before leaving the room.
The atmosphere became awkward really fast.
“Chloe provided an update,” Beau finally said, breaking the silence.
“It’s good that you’re caught up,” Archer responded.
Hudson returned double-fisting coffees. “One for each of you.” He handed them over and then perched on the edge of the seat across the coffee table from them. Elbows resting on his knees, he leaned toward them. “We’ll get them back safely.”
“Archer and I were just talking about what our next move should be.” She glanced over at Archer. “What does everyone think about asking the sheriff to pull back.”
Hudson blew out a breath. “The way I see it, there are risks both ways.” He studied Annalee. “Have you heard from your mother since the last update?”
Annalee shook her head. “Afraid not.”
“It’s strange, don’t you think?” Beau ran a finger along the rim of his coffee mug as all gazes shifted to him. “Your mother gives you evidence to keep her safe, and then suddenly she’s asking for ransom money rather than where’s the evidence.”
“I’m guessing the asshole she was running from figured out Owen was a Sturgess after abducting him.” Annalee had been trying to piece it all together herself. She didn’t understand why the evidence wouldn’t be more important to the kidnapper than any money. Nothing about interactions with her mother was ever straightforward, so Annalee was used to the weirdness when it came to dealing with Becca.
Beau was right, though. It was weird.