Chapter 4
4
DANTE
T he next morning, Luca paced endlessly across the floor. When I started to say something, he cut me off. “Don’t start again.”
He was driving me insane.
At least it was mutual.
“We shouldn’t have gone this long without talking to Celia,” I disagreed.
I’d been saying for years that instead of maneuvering pieces on the chessboard—including her—we should bring her in on her plans.
The queen was the most powerful piece on the board.
Luca scoffed. “Gabriel was right to make you play mute. I believed him about making sure she didn’t recognize your voice, but I think he always knew you’d be a simp for that girl.”
“Being a simp for a girl like Celia is better than being an asshole like you.”
Luca scrubbed his hand over his face. “You should hear yourself. And what the fuck was with that note you left me?”
“Was I unclear?” I asked.
Luca shook his head. Even before he spoke, I knew from his expression he’d choose sarcasm over violence—for now. “I didn’t hurt her. Celia’s not fragile like you think.”
“I don’t see her as fragile. I see her as incredible. She deserves better than us.”
“Fucking Christ, I hope Gabriel’s going to chain you to the wall before he takes her to the Obsidian.”
Just the thought made my mood darken, even further than Luca’s stupidity already caused.
Every new mafia leader’s wedding was sealed. Every new mafia leader’s wife was sacrificed.
“There it is,” Luca noted. “That’s the face that makes me feel we’re doomed.”
“And what are you going to do? You’re going to stand by and smile while Gabriel uses her?”
Luca waved off the thought. “Unlike you, Gabriel makes plans and sticks to them.”
“Just like you, Gabriel is unhinged.”
Luca paused, no longer prowling across the floor like a caged tiger. “Did you ever intend to stick with the plan? Or did you just go along with us for her sake? So you could get close to her?”
I shook my head, my jaw tight.
This wasn’t the first time Gabriel had kept me locked up. For my own safety, of course. Not because nothing mattered to him but his plans.
Not even his brothers.
“You’re locked in here with me, Luca,” I reminded him.
“He’s not the same man he used to be.” Luca seemed genuinely troubled.
He’d had plastic surgery, too, altering his nose and jaw so that he looked like my brother—with my new face—not Gabriel’s. But his mannerisms were still the same as they’d always been. The details of his face didn’t matter.
I hoped like hell Celia felt the same way about me. That she would be able to see me behind the mask I always had to wear.
I still loved her like I’d loved her when we were kids. The thought of losing that affection twisted in my gut.
“He’s exactly the same man he’s always been,” I told Luca. “You just don’t want to see it.”
“No.” Luca shook his head. “He always tried to protect us. But now it’s like his need to control has taken over.”
“Now you think things are different because you’re locked up too this time.”
Maybe Luca thought, just as I did, about what it had taken to get Gabriel to release me. Because he said, “She’s going to hate you when she thinks you could’ve just come to her. You could’ve just spilled your guts the day we started working our way up in the Carmichaels’ operation.”
“I’m aware,” I said, despite how much his words grated at me.
“You can’t tell her until it’s done. For her sake, Dante.” Luca looked serious, even though it was serious bullshit. “She’ll lose it. We need her to cooperate with Gabriel’s plan so we can keep her safe.”
“I don’t think you’re giving her enough credit. She’ll understand?—”
“I don’t think you’re giving enough credit to her rage . Her entirely deserved rage.” Luca’s words were harsh, lashing. “She didn’t just grieve you and move on. Her life has been a nightmare. A nightmare you caused.”
“I know!” I exploded, rising from my seat. I was haunted by the glimpses of her past, by the things she’d told me.
When she was a girl, she never told me about the things Amato had done to her.
Maybe she’d known I would try to kill him.
I had, in the end. But I should’ve murdered Amato five years ago. She never should’ve suffered for a single day after I entered her life.
“I know she’s been in pain,” I said more quietly. It wasn’t just Amato. She’d blamed herself for my death.
Gabriel blamed her. He was angry that my foolishness and hers had caused Mal Carmichael to order my death. He expected me to be grateful he’d gotten me out of there alive, no matter the cost.
But I couldn’t summon much gratitude.
“The best chance we have,” Luca said in a reasonable voice, “is to keep the secrets. Get her to follow Gabriel’s bidding. if she’s afraid that he’ll hurt us, so she needs to obey? Good. Because I’m also afraid that he’ll hurt us. I’m not sure his monster facade is an act anymore.”
“Could you stop being selfish for five fucking minutes?”
“Could you? You just want her . But that obsession doesn’t do her any favors.”
God, had Gabriel put us in here together so we could kill each other? At first, I had been surprised—and grateful. I wanted to make sure Luca was all right after his injuries. Now, it felt like just another one of Gabriel’s cruel games.
“Listen,” Luca said more quietly, before I could say any of the responses that were boiling inside me. “What if we give Gabriel what we want? We put her on her father’s throne. As his wife, sure. But in the end, she’s on the throne. Isn’t she better off? Don’t you think our little queen was born to rule?”
“Gabriel being the king won’t make her a queen. We’ll all still be his pawns.”
Luca swiped his hand through his hair. “So, what’s your plan? If Gabriel ever lets us out of here, you’re going to run to her and confess?”
“No,” I said, because I didn’t trust him.
Luca’s brows arched, as if he distrusted me right back.
Then he said, “What if we put her on the throne, and then we make Gabriel back off?”
I frowned at him.
“You and I could share her,” Luca said. “We could make it up to her. Be good to her.”
“You think Gabriel’s going to give up his wife?”
“Why would he care?”
Was he blind? Gabriel was hard to read, but we were his brothers. No one knew him better.
“He’s going to fall in love with her,” I said.
Luca let out a whoop of a laugh. “That’s the stupidest thing you’ve said today. And you said, we should just tell Celia the truth. Gabriel’s not capable of that kind of love.”
“But you think he loves us?”
“I think trying to keep us alive and making our family powerful are his two defining habits. They’re as close as he comes to having a personality these days.”
There was a noise outside. The two of us traded a look, going silent.
The door to the suite swung open. Gabriel walked in. Mr. Personality himself.
“What do you want, Gabriel?” I asked.
Gabriel’s brows rose. “You must be enjoying your stay. It is a nice suite, isn’t it?” He glanced around at the cozy living area; beyond it was the bedroom.
The fucking asshole had put bunk beds in there for us.
“You should definitely keep him locked up,” Luca said, like the traitor he was.
“And here I was hoping you’d both attend the wedding tomorrow. It’s too bad you can’t stand up with me as my best men.” Gabriel looked me over. “Would you even be able to handle watching me marry her?”
“I don’t mind the idea of sharing her,” I said. “I just mind the idea of sharing her with controlling bastards who don’t deserve her.”
“Sharing her? Is that what you two are planning now?” Gabriel’s lips curled up in a familiar teasing smile. It was a very older brother look, and it felt strange seeing it on his face.
It made me miss him, even though he was right there with us.
“Why not?” Luca asked with a shrug. “It’s either that or nothing. You know Dante would carry her over our corpses to keep her feet from getting dirty.”
Gabriel shook his head. “You’ve gotten attached to something you can never keep.”
“Something?” I demanded. “She’s not something .”
Gabriel’s smile disappeared. There was tension etched around his eyes. “You might not stand next to me tomorrow, but I do need my brothers back.”
“We haven’t gone anywhere.” Luca gestured around us. “You’ve made sure of that.”
“Once we were a team. Once you were willing to do anything to get revenge.”
“Once I was willing to do anything to get her,” I said shortly. Let me confirm their worst fears. I needed Luca and Gabriel to come to their senses.
Deep down, I still must believe in them.
“The Carmichaels killed our parents.” Gabriel sounded as if he were speaking to children. “Are you going to let that go? No pussy can be that fucking magical.”
I was on my feet before I even realized it.
Gabriel’s gaze flashed up to mine. The expressions that flickered across his face were surprise, then almost exultant. His hands dangled loosely at his side, but I could sense the way he had shifted his weight, preparing for a fight. “Ready to get your ass kicked again, little brother? I taught you almost everything. Almost. That almost is really?—”
“Take it easy.” Luca pushed me back. I couldn’t hit him; Luca couldn’t handle one more fucking concussion. “You don’t want to ruin Celia’s wedding day tomorrow, do you? The only thing this fucker has going for him is his pretty face.”
He patted my shoulder comfortingly, despite the fact he talked like, well, Luca.
Gabriel seemed disappointed. “Well, I’m going to go visit my fiancée. And tomorrow, you two will attend our wedding. On your best behavior…because it will hurt Celia if you aren’t.”
He flashed us a smile on his way out.
Luca patted my shoulder one more time before he stepped aside, just as the door clicked shut. “Like I said, he’s different.”
“He shouldn’t be marrying her with secrets between them.”
“This marriage doesn’t mean anything to him, Dante.”
“It will.”
CELIA
I was in the closet when I heard Gabriel enter our rooms briskly, bringing in a crackle of angry energy. Still bent over the trunks of my things that had been sent over, I froze. I’d begun to unpack them, but suddenly I wondered if I’d made a mistake.
I began to move again, woodenly, but terror gripped me, even as I quietly hung hangers and smoothed clothes with just-barely-shaking hands.
I’d spent most of my life walking on eggshells around my father’s and Royal’s rages.’ I could barely function when a man was angry in my presence.
In the distance, there were the sounds of him moving things around on his desk. Then the soft footfalls of his feet approaching.
I realized I was holding my breath and dragged in another breath with difficulty.
Everything about Gabriel made it hard to breathe around him at the best of times.
I felt him lean in the doorway of my closet, watching me. His gaze prickled on my back as if I were dangerously exposed, like a deer’s impulse pretending they don’t see the wolf stalking them.
Had he been checking to see if the file about my father’s business maneuverings was still untouched?
I hadn’t gone anywhere near his desk. I assumed I was being watched in some way. But still, I was afraid that he suspected me.
“Did you visit Luca and Dante today?” he asked me.
I jumped, even though I’d known he was there. His voice was so dark and deep.
“No,” I said, rising from the trunk and turning to face him. I’d assumed he wouldn’t like me visiting them. And I’d felt sure I was being watched. Tested.
Judged.
“Why not?”
I tucked my hair behind my ears, trying to decide the safe way to respond. But Gabriel’s gaze followed my hand, and when he took a step forward and caught my hand in his, my fingers trembled against his palm.
“Celia,” he said, his voiced soft and unreadable.
“Mm?” I aimed my brightest, fakest smile his way, trying to cover my fear.
“Come with me,” he said. “I was going to save your wedding gift, but…I think you need a distraction from the terrifying prospect of being married to me.”
He spoke the truth so lightly.
I followed him down the stairs, through the halls and out into the massive garage. My bulky armored SUV was parked in here, alongside his SUV and his preferred McLaren sports car. In the furthest stall were two sleek motorcycles, one black and one purple.
I looked at him with uncertainty. He wasn’t really giving me a motorcycle, was he? I didn’t want to assume.
“Is purple your favorite color?” he asked.
“Yes.”
He patted the handlebars of the bike. “I prefer black.”
Like your soul ? But I didn’t make the joke.
“It’s for you, Celia,” he said, patiently, as if he realized I wasn’t going to touch it until he made himself clear. “Get on.”
“I won’t…turn it on by accident?”
“You don’t know how to drive one, do you?” He seemed amused, not surprised.
“I didn’t expect you to actually get one!”
“You shouldn’t test me,” he chided. “You asked for a motorcycle. Here it is.”
“Gabriel, I…” The gift was so unexpected. I couldn’t hide my confusion. I managed to say, “Thank you.”
“I’m not going to let you get hurt,” he promised me. Then because he was Gabriel Caruso, he added, “I need you unbroken for our wedding.”
“It’s a big gift.”
He scoffed. “No, the big gift will be teaching you to ride it. I’ve never been a very patient teacher.”
“You’re going to teach me?”
“I’d like to have a competent wife.” He pressed a button on his phone, and the door rumbled upward. He wheeled the bike out into the courtyard.
The setting sun scattered golden light on his face, illuminating the firm jaw, his lush lips, the sharp cheekbones and high forehead. His face was a work of art.
“You’ll need safety gear too,” he told me.
“Because you need me unbroken for our wedding,” I said as he walked back into the garage.
He returned carrying a black leather jacket and a purple helmet that was just as shiny as my bike.
“Because I need that brain of yours unscrambled,” he told me, settling the motorcycle helmet over my hair. “It’s bad enough I have to deal with Luca and Dante.”
Surprise jolted through me. He’d really said their names and opened the door to discussing them. “The three of you have always been working together, haven’t you? You maneuvered things so that Luca would become my bodyguard?”
He didn’t answer me. He just held up the fitted leather jacket pointedly. It felt strange to have a man hold my jacket while I slipped my arms into it. He closed it around me, and maybe it was my imagination that his hands seemed to linger on my body.
“You don’t disappoint me, Celia.”
I turned to him, startled. The words were so unexpected that I couldn’t even process the compliment to feel anything. And I wasn’t sure what had prompted the words. “Well, give me some time. I’ve never been a very good driver.”
Gabriel’s brows arched, and I added, “I’ve never had much practice. Though I did learn to drive, I’m usually a passenger…”
“We’ll change that. Get on.” He was still holding the handlebars.
Feeling slightly nervous, I slid my leg over to straddle the bike.
He moved behind me, his body close enough that I could feel his radiating heat. He gripped my wrists and placed my hands on the handles. “Put your hands here.”
The warmth of his hands over mine sent a shock of heat through me. I needed to focus, and I determinedly forced away the distraction.
His breath brushed against my ear. “Hold tight. Trust me.”
That was a lot to ask.
“I’m ready,” I told him.
I watched his deft hands as the motorcycle roared to life. The rumble seemed to vibrate through my body, and I felt nervous in a strange, jubilant way all at the same time. The sound seemed to envelop us, as if we were in a bubble, just for now.
As if Gabriel and I were not the same people we were the rest of the time, the predator and the prey who hoped to strike back.
At least I could pretend just for tonight that things were different. I had to marry him tomorrow. There was going to be a lot of pretending in my future.
He shifted the weight of his body, and without even realizing what I was doing, I leaned back into him, seeking his solidity.
“We’ll go slow at first. Just feel how it moves.” His hand was over mine as he showed me how to gently twist the throttle. We moved forward mere feet before he brought us back to a stop.
“Good?”
“Good, but I’m not really controlling it.”
“Yet,” he added. It sounded like a correction. “You don’t need to rush it. You’ll get the hang of it from riding with me.”
I nodded.
His hand over mine twisted the throttle again, and we glided forward. The powerful vibrations from the machine seemed to rush through me.
We went up the driveway.
“Lean with me,” he murmured against my ear as we came to the first curve. I obeyed instinctively, my body molding into his. The way I just obeyed surprised me.
The motorcycle swayed like a living thing with our movement, and I was surprised to hear myself laugh. As we accelerated a little more quickly, exhilaration coursed through me. The wind on my face felt like freedom.
We made circles across the long circular expanse of the driveway. We were probably going five miles an hour, but it felt like an insane rush to me. I realized I was grinning.
“You can handle this, Celia,” he told me quietly. “I’m taking my hands off.”
“That’s not something I’d expect a man like you to say,” I said, clearly drunk on the giddy exultation of riding the bike. I regretted the words as soon as they were out of my mouth.
I tried to get a glimpse of his face out of the corner of my eye. Was he angry?
“Focus, Celia. You can do this, but not if you’re more focused on me than on the road.”
Then, to my surprise, he took his hands off mine.
Well, at least if I screwed up, this would be my chance to murder him. Even if I died too.
The thought careened through my mind, about as wildly as the motorcycle felt for a few seconds. And then I felt like I got the hang of it, continuing in a very slow loop around the long circular drive.
“Next we tackle the open road,” he told me. “But not tonight.”
Still, I couldn’t shake this wild sense of excitement that I had been able to ride a motorcycle on my own at all. He climbed off the bike and offered me his hand. I took it, and he helped me off.
His gaze caught on mine, our hands still linked, as I pulled the helmet off. “You look beautiful.”
Then he dropped my hand and strode away.
I walked to the house and checked in on my puppy and then went up to bed; he didn’t come to our bed before I fell asleep.
I replayed those giddy moments on the bike as I drifted off to sleep alone the night before my wedding.