Chapter 14
Elodie
Ortak’s presence behind me is unnerving.
Not because I’m worried he’s going to hurt me or any such nonsense like that.
Rather, it’s as if I can literally feel him thinking.
There’s this aura of intensity pulsating around him that keeps ricocheting off my body.
It’s that sensation sending chills down my spine.
I smile and nod and make all the appropriate sounds while listening with half an ear to Gannen as he recounts his story of the successful hunt he and Ortak had today. I’m beyond excited for him, because I can tell how much it all means to him.
“If the shefir and shefira do not mind, perhaps Gogo and I can share the evening meal with you before we return to our village,” Gannen says, and then, as if, considering, adds. “That is, if it is alright with both you and Gogo.”
This kid. “If your gogo isn’t in a hurry to get back to your village and no one minds if you stay, then I’d be happy to eat with you. We can make our way toward the central fire and find out. I’m pretty sure it’s almost time for the evening meal anyway.”
We both turn to Ortak who has finally moved around to Gannen’s other side to stand. I’m not sure how much longer I could have taken with him looming behind me.
“So long as we are welcome, we will stay.”
I reach for the crutches that are propped against the bench on my other side and use them to help me stand. Gannen stays close to my side as we leave the riverbank, like he’s watching to make sure I don’t stumble.
“You navigate well with those,” Ortak tells me.
“Thanks. It’s not the first time I’ve had to use a pair, although, it was never for as long as I’ll need to use these ones.”
“You have broken other bones before?” Gannen asks.
His question makes me chuckle and flush. “I might have been something of a wild child, trying to gain any kind of attention I could from my parents. Even if that attention was negative and included being sent to the hospital.”
Both Krijese look at me in confusion, but I merely shrug.
We slowly travel through the village until we make it to the central fire. Sure enough, several people have already gathered, including London and her two children. She glances our direction, and after a quick word to the others, she heads our way with a warm smile.
“It’s so nice to see you again Ortak.” She turns. “And you too, Gannen. I hope you both are well?”
“We are, and you have our thanks, Shefira.”
London shifts her gaze to me. “I’m glad to see you’re still getting around pretty easily.”
“Rojtar was a total lifesaver with these things.” I gesture to my crutches.
“Good.”
“Nene!”
The shefira glances over her shoulder and back to us. “My apologies, but I’m being summoned. Enjoy your visit, and I hope we’ll see you both again soon.”
London returns to her children and picks up the youngest who had been the one to call out. They’re too far away for us to hear what’s being discussed, but I suspect a lesson in patience might be coming at some point.
“Why don’t we find a place to sit?” I point in a general direction of the multiple benches around the fire.
“I will find us a spot,” Gannen announces.
“Lead the way.” I grin.
Ortak and I follow him over to a bench only long enough for two people, but also has a single, child-size stump slightly in front of it. To my surprise, Gannen sits on one end of the bench and pats the open spot next to him. “Elodie, you can sit here if you like.”
Biting back a laugh, I take a seat and glance up at Ortak. “I guess you’re stuck there. Unless you want to switch?”
The older Krijese huffs. “No decent male would ask a female—especially one with a broken leg—to sit on this thing. I am happy to do so.”
“Well, thank you.” I’m actually surprised Gannen didn’t orchestrate it so his dad and I sat next to each other. Sage had shared with me what a matchmaker Sorin had been with Iris and Kala. Maybe Gannen is biding his time.
Another thought hits me. One that is weirdly unwelcome.
What if he’s not interested in me being his mother anymore?
Or what if he doesn’t consider me good enough to be his dad’s mate?
But if he would like me to consider being his mother, why wouldn’t he also consider me as a mate for his father?
Why the hell am I even thinking and spiraling about this?
“Elodie, are you listening?” Gannen asks, dragging me out of the mini meltdown I’m having over something so ridiculous.
“I’m sorry, I got distracted. What were you saying?”
“I asked if you would like to go to the training arena with us after the evening meal and watch me practice my axe throwing with the other kits?”
The training arena sits at the bottom of a pretty steep incline f. “I’m not sure it would be safe for me to try and hop down there.”
Gannen’s shoulders drop. “I did not think of that. I do not wish for you to get hurt.”
I push a strand of his rope hair back off his forehead.
“I’ll gladly sit at the top of the hill and watch you from up there.
I’ll still have a great view from up above.
And when I’m finally able to walk on both feet again without my crutches, I promise I’ll come down and get a front row seat to whatever you want to show me. How’s that?”
The sweet boy perks up. “Let us shake hands. That is what you do when you come to an agreement about something, yes?”
I laugh and stick out my hand. “Yes, that’s what you do.”
Gannen places his palm in mine and moves them both up and down. The human mannerisms he’s picked up are so funny. I guess it’s bound to happen considering the amount of time he and Sorin have probably spent here over the last few years.
“You will not forget our agreement when the time comes, will you?” he asks.
“I promise I won’t forget.”
Gannen seems satisfied with my answer. I glance at Ortak. He usually has to remind his son to breathe and take a break from controlling the conversation and not letting others speak. “You’ve been awfully quiet today. Is everything okay?”
“Aye. I merely have many things I am thinking about.”
I lean over and place my hand on Ortak’s thigh. He jerks under my touch, and I yank my hand back with an awkward cough. “Sorry. Um, well, if you ever need someone to listen, I’m available.”
“You have my thanks.”
An uncomfortable silence falls. I can’t say I’m a fan.
Has there ever been a weird lull in conversation between us before this?
If there has, I can’t recall it. For some reason, though, this one is extremely uncomfortable.
It’s not like Ortak and I haven’t touched before.
It’s all been friendly and innocent. This time, it’s as if I burned him.
I look everywhere but at Ortak. Even Gannen stops talking and stares. For god’s sake, this is dumb. I fumble for something to say.
“I’ve decided I’m staying in the Tavikhi village even after my leg’s healed. I’m not going back to the settlement.”
“Truly?” Gannen asks.
“Truly. I don’t have any reason not to. I’ve made friends here.
Plus, I’ll be closer to your village than I would be if I went back there.
Since we’re friends, too, I figure why not move a little closer.
Then, neither of us will have too far to travel to see the other.
Maybe once I’m all healed, you and I can do some hiking around the mountains.
You can teach me all these tracking skills you’ve been learning. ”
Gannen nods maniacally. “Yes, I would love to do these things with you.”
“Great. It’ll give me something to look forward to.” I nudge him gently with my shoulder and avoid looking over at Ortak.“It would appear they have started serving the meal.” Ortak stands. “I will get our food for us.”
“Wait, I’ll come.” I move to rise.
“No, sit.”
Slowly, I lower myself back down. “Are you sure? You don’t have to go by yourself. It’s a lot for one person to carry back.”
“You should continue resting your legs. I will return soon.”
“Alright then, thank you.” I don’t look away as Ortak walks to get into the line that’s formed.
“Elodie?”
I tear my gaze from the elder Krijese and onto his son. “Yes, hon?”
“Do you ever wish for a mate?”
Oh, hell. How am I supposed to answer that? I clear my throat to give me an extra couple seconds. “I think if I found a person and we fell in love with each other, then I would like to become their mate.”
Gannen nods slowly like I’ve said what he expected me to. “That is what Gogo said as well. He wishes for a female to care for and show affection to who will do the same in return.”
“That is how it usually works between two people. They meet, fall in love, and become mates.” I mean, that’s the simplified version of it, I suppose.
“Of course, people can fall in love and not necessarily become mates. It doesn’t mean they love each other any less.
Being mated to another person can often be complicated. ”
Gannen cants his head. “I do not know if I understand. What is complicated about it?”
I search out Ortak—a little desperate for some intervention here—but he’s still in line for food. I’m not cut out to explain the nuances of intimate relationships with a child. The longest I’ve ever been in one was two months and I certainly wouldn’t consider it some great love affair.
“I’m sorry. I’m not very good at explaining these sort of things. It’s just a lot of grown up stuff I’m not sure how to appropriately describe.” A total cop out.
Maybe because he can tell how far out of my comfort zone we are or he’s temporarily satisfied with my non-answer, Gannen doesn’t push me. “Have you ever been in love before? Sorin has explained the different types of love to me. At least the ones his momo has described to him.”
“I haven’t.” Given the fact I’m over thirty, the knowledge I’ve never once been in love is honestly kind of depressing.
“I love my gogo. I love Sorin like a brother,” Gannen says. “I also have great affection for Moshi and Ashrif, as well as the rest of our tribe. I must have loved my first momo as well.”
“Of course you did. I’m sure she loved you too.”
He shakes his head in a slow, depressing motion. “I do not think so. No other Krijese except Kala, Sorin, Gogo, and me have learned to love. They do not know how.”
Christ, this kid is going to break my heart.
I turn to Gannen and gently cradle his face between my palms. “I never met your first momo—or any other members of your tribe—but you will never convince me that she didn’t look upon your face and not know how to love it.
It would be impossible for her to do anything else but love you. Do you hear me?”
He scans my face and slowly nods. “I hear you.”
“Good.” I release my hold on him, but only to draw him into a tight hug. “Don’t you ever forget that, either.”