19/Renee
I waited another half hour and called Danielle. Calvin had to be gone by now. The phone rang and rang, then went to her voicemail.
Yep, the bitch was tripping, because any other time, the second that mothafucka walked out the door, she would have been calling me with all the details. We’re best friends and that’s what best friends do. Fine, let her ass trip.
I went into my office and decided it was time to get to work on my manuscript.
I have a bad habit of procrastinating until the last minute, and then I’m stressed out trying to meet my deadline.
Well, not this time. As soon as I outlined the next scene, of course the phone rang.
The only reason why I answered it was because I thought it was Danielle calling.
“Renee, how could you?”
“Could I what?”
“Screw Calvin,” Nadine stated frankly.
“I didn’t screw Calvin.”
“Well, you probably were only seconds away from it if Danny hadn’t walked in when she did.”
“She asked me to seduce the mothafucka!” I cried defensively.
“Yeah, come on to him. Not try to screw him.”
“I can’t help it if men can’t resist me.”
“I’m sure you didn’t make it easy,” Nadine replied sarcastically.
“Whatever. I faked tears and next thing I knew he was going down on me.”
“And you just couldn’t say no.”
“Why would I do that? The whole idea was to get him to come on to me so that Danielle could walk in and go off.”
“Yeah, but she was supposed to catch the two of you kissing. Not with your shirts off and his head down between your thighs.”
“What she do, call you the second she kicked his ass outta her house? Shit, I can’t help it if he wanted a little licky-lick.”
“No, your nasty behind wanted him to lick it,” she corrected.
That bitch thinks she knows me. “Girl, puh-leeze.” I snorted, even though I knew good and damn well Nadine wasn’t going to fall for it.
“Renee, you know I know how your ass is.”
“Well,” I finally admitted, “how could I tell him to stop? Hell, that shit felt good as hell. Nadine, don’t play, you wouldn’t have stopped him, either.”
“Yes, I would, because—”
“Oops, my bad. I forgot you don’t do men.”
There was a noticeable pause. “A tongue is a tongue. If he’s good, I’d be willing to make an exception.”
“What?” I couldn’t believe my ears. Nadine would allow a man to eat her coochie? “You mean to tell me you’re thinking about coming back over from the dark side?”
“I didn’t say that,” she quickly corrected. “I said if it’s good, it doesn’t matter what sex that tongue belongs to.”
Hell nah! I couldn’t believe my ears. Shit, maybe there’s some hope for her yet. “The tongue was good. That brotha has mad skills, but I already knew that. Remember, I messed with him long before Danny did.”
“So, is that what this is really all about?”
“Hell no! I’ll admit last year when they first started talking I was feeling some type of way about the whole thing with Danny going behind my back, but I’ve since gotten past that shit.
I wasn’t thinking about Calvin’s tired ass until Danny asked me to do that stupid shit, and now she’s got the nerve to be mad. ”
“She said you took the shit too far.”
“Too far! Did that bitch tell you she scratched the shit out of me?” My question was met by silence. “No, I guess she didn’t.”
“You shouldn’t have done what you did.”
“And that gave her the right to scratch me?” I was too through. “Fuck her. She better be glad I didn’t dot that eye.”
“You owe her an apology.”
“For what? Giving her the excuse she needed to end her relationship with Calvin? Hell, if she wasn’t such a punk I would have never been in the middle of her bullshit in the first place. So, if anyone’s to blame, it’s her.” I was mad. Danny’s ass was definitely stuck on stupid.
“If anyone should be mad, it’s me. Hell, I was five seconds away from getting mine when her ass came barging into the room. Shit, if it had been me, I would have at least waited until she got hers first.”
“You should call her and apologize.”
“I’ll apologize when she tells me she’s sorry for scratching my neck with her long-ass fingernails! Do you know she drew blood? Hell, I bled all over my shirt.” Well, Calvin’s shirt, if you want to get technical about it.
“She wouldn’t have scratched you if you weren’t with her man.”
“Whose side are you on?”
Nadine chuckled. “I’m on nobody’s side. I’m just trying to keep the peace.”
“Girl, fuck Danny! I’m not about to kiss her ass. She’ll get over it like she always does.” Hell, it ain’t like this is the first time the two of us have bumped heads.
“Whatever, we’ve got a wedding to plan and don’t need this shit.”
“Hey, as far as I’m concerned it’s business as usual. Hell, I’m not about to change my number. She’s the one tripping, not me. Anyway, enough about her. How’s the baby making going?”
Nadine sighed heavily in my ear. “It’s a long story.”
“Shit, I ain’t got nothing but time tonight.”
“What? You don’t have plans?”
“I was hoping a man was coming by to give me some, but I guess that’s not happening, so I’m free.”
Nadine had to laugh. “You want to go and have a drink at Tropical Liquors?”
Our favorite frozen drink spot. “Sounds like a plan.”
“I’ll meet you at eight.”
On the way to meet Nadine, I stopped at the gas station at the corner to put some gas in my car. With gas prices it was cheaper to ride the bus. If we had better public transportation, I probably would. I finished pumping my gas when I spotted Landon’s punk ass coming out of the convenience store.
“Landon!” I yelled. He turned and as soon as he noticed it was me, he looked away and started hurrying toward his Tahoe.
“Pissy! You hear me calling you!” I quickly moved across the parking lot trying to catch him before he climbed into his car. “Where’s my goddamn mattress?”
He continued moving like he didn’t hear me.
Oh, he heard me.
I sprinted over to him calling his name, but before I could even contemplate jumping on the hood of his Tahoe, he peeled off.
I was so mad, I hurried back to my car and went after him and missed him at the corner because the old lady in front of me was too scared to run a yellow light.
I blew my horn and her wrinkled ass gave me the finger.
Damn!
I picked up my cell phone and retrieved his number from my contact list and started to dial but decided to block the call first.
“Hello?”
“You pissy ass—” No, he didn’t hang up on me. I called Landon again but naturally he didn’t answer, so I waited until his voice mail picked up. “Pissy, you need to be buying me a new mattress before I come to your job and embarrass your stinky ass.”
When I got to the restaurant I was even madder from thinking about it. I spotted Nadine at the back of the restaurant and headed over to where she was sitting.
“Sorry I’m late.” I flopped down on the seat across from her.
“What’s wrong with you?”
I shrugged out of my coat and rolled my eyes. “I ran into Landon’s pissy ass.”
Nadine started giggling.
“I saw him and tried to flag him down and he tried to play me.” I reached for the menu. “Hell, he heard me calling his name.”
“Maybe he’s embarrassed.”
“He should be… pissing in the bed! What he needs to do is man up and buy me a new mattress.”
Nadine shook her head. “I still can’t believe he peed in your bed. I told my brother and he cracked up laughing.” Her brother and Landon went way back.
“Tell Murray he needs to tell his boy to buy me a new mattress or else I’m gonna fuck him up.”
“Renee, shut up. You’re not gonna do shit.”
I rolled my eyes. In the years we’ve known each other, she obviously doesn’t know what I’m capable of.
I gave her a dismissive wave. “Enough about me. I want to hear about the baby making.”
“Jordan and I found a sperm donor.”
“Cool, and when’s the screwing begin?”
She dropped her head, avoiding eye contact. “It already started.”
“Ooh, what’s he look like?”
“Fine.”
“Fine?” She had my full attention.
Her eyes grew really big. “Chocolate body, good hair, educated, you name it.”
My brow rose. “And you noticed?”
“Oh yeah, I noticed, and that’s the problem.”
I couldn’t believe what I was hearing. “Wait, I got to go and get a drink first, ’cause this shit is too good to hear without a buzz.
” I moved over to the bar and waited impatiently for a couple of college students to quit sampling drinks and make a selection.
When it was finally my turn, I quickly ordered two frozen Long Island iced teas and an order of nachos, then scurried back to our table before Nadine clammed up.
She has always been a private person. Shit, she didn’t even want to tell us she was a lesbian and probably wouldn’t have if it hadn’t been for my sister Lisa.
So, the fact that she was even trying to share her feelings was enough to make my ass want to run back to my seat.
That top twenty shit they was playing was loud as hell, so I moved to the chair beside Nadine so I wouldn’t miss one word. “Okay, girl, go ahead and spill the beans about this man.”
“Well,” she began between chews, “the funny thing is I never think about being with a man. But ever since we . .. I can’t seem to get him off my mind.”
I took a sip. This was better than a movie. “Are you craving dick now?”
She dropped her head and took a deep breath before answering. “I already had it.”
“What! Ooh, you need to back up and explain, because inquiring minds want to know.”
Nadine then started confessing more shit than I needed to know.
A menage with her, Jordan, and the sperm donor.
I almost fell out of my seat. “I didn’t plan on participating, but Jordan wanted me in the room.
Watching them turned me on, and the next thing I knew I was taking off my clothes and Jordan invited me over to join them.
I wanted everything he was giving her.” Nadine had to take a deep breath as she reminisced.
“Damn.” I sat there chewing on chips, hanging on every word. This was some freaky-deaky shit, and I was the queen of freaky so you know this shit had me turned on. “Shit, what’s the brotha working with?”