Chapter 7 Janie
JANIE
That was twice now that Jack Price had stolen my breath. He didn’t need a hand on my throat; his words worked just as well. What took you so long? The audacity.
I gaped down at him, my mouth flapping open like a hooked fish as I took in all six-foot-two-inches of leanly muscled, gorgeous man sprawled in front of me.
That sexy little smirk playing in the corner of those full lips he had once pressed against my core and made me come undone.
Blue eyes sparkling up at me like he was remembering it, too. And then he winked at me.
Winked.
It was a little much, to be honest.
I wrenched my gaze away with an aggravated huff. My gaze landed on the river and I blinked, suddenly disoriented as a memory surfaced.
This was my sanctuary, the place I ran to when I needed to cry or scream or just get my bad out.
I had been coming here for so long that I had almost forgotten that it was also the place I had met Jack for the first time.
Right there, where the wide, straight river curved in a deep bend like it had a sudden change of heart.
I had stood right there with my arms stretched like wings, and—
“Speaking of salamanders, Mother, I’m going to look by those rocks,” Maya said.
I shook off the memory and smiled at my daughter. Speaking of was her new favorite phrase, but she hadn’t quite gotten the hang of it yet. Speaking of, she’d say, and then fill in the blank with whatever she wanted to talk about.
“Go ahead,” I said. “Stay where I can see you.” Maya had a habit of wandering off toward whatever interested her. Fortunately, she wasn’t very quick about it.
I pretended I couldn’t feel the weight of Jack’s stare on me as I watched her amble to the rocks. My skin prickled. When I couldn’t take it another second, I looked back at him. His eyes were sharp, all traces of laughter gone.
“Mother?” He tipped his chin. “Something you forget to tell me, Janie?”
“Yes. You’re a father,” I deadpanned. “Congratulations, daddy.”
The shocked, stricken look on his face made me burst into laughter.
“Did the marines not teach you math? Maya is almost eight, Jack. I’m pretty sure I’d remember if we’d had sex eight years ago.
” Sex with Jack wasn’t something a woman was likely to forget.
I felt sorry for every man who came after him, not that there would be one anytime soon.
“You’re off the hook. This time,” I teased.
“Not a marine.” He smirked. “Anyway, if you’re going to smack me in the face with my worst fear, maybe you can forgive me for forgetting how reality works for a minute.”
My head tilted. “Knocking up a one-night stand is your biggest fear?” Jack had been in the special forces.
He had been shot, stabbed, and nearly killed, but being a dad was what scared him?
It shouldn’t have even made his top ten.
Oh, lord, he was a commitment-phobe. Of course he was.
The hotter the man, the bigger the douche. And Jack was really fucking hot.
“Not knocking up a one-night stand. Having a child I wasn’t there for.
That’s my worst fear.” He shook his head, tsking softly like he was disappointed in me.
My stomach dropped. “Come on, Ace. You’re friends with my sister.
You know my dad walked out on us and didn’t even bother to show up for her wedding. ”
“Shit,” I mumbled. He was right. I had known that. Now I was the one who was a douche. “Of course you have daddy issues.”
“Essie has daddy issues,” he corrected. “I have something to prove.”
“Oh.” I looked away. Maya’s red curls bobbed as she squatted by a boulder. My heart squeezed. Every child should have a dad like that, a dad hell bent on showing up for her. I swallowed the thickness in my throat and stole Maya’s line. “Speaking of rivers, please excuse me while I go jump in one.”
I spun away, not to go jump in the river even though that was what I deserved, but to hunt salamanders with Maya, but I didn’t make it a single step before Jack wrapped his large hand around my ankle like a shackle.
“Hey!” I protested. Good lord, the man was quick as a snake and even more lethal. At least rattlers gave a warning before they struck.
“It took you seven months to find me. You think I’m letting you walk away now?” With a low laugh, he tugged me off balance. I tumbled backwards, yelping like a deranged poodle—and fell straight into Jack’s waiting arms.
And that was the third time Jack had made me breathless.
I sucked in air and glared at him like my stomach wasn’t swooshing with butterflies.
My hands curled around his biceps. There was no give when I flexed my fingers.
Solid boulders. “You know, I’m getting really tired of you knocking the wind out of me,” I groused.
He considered me with serious blue eyes. A girl could ruin her life over eyes like that, over the way they made her feel so seen.
I was so damn good at ruining my life.
But now there was so much more at stake. There was Maya. And I’d be damned before I let one of my bad decisions hurt her again.
“Is that why you didn’t call me?” he asked. There was no defensiveness in his voice. No censure, either. It was just a question and, coming from him, it didn’t have a right or wrong answer.
“No,” I said honestly. “I didn’t call you because it was a one-night stand, and because you ran away to Wyoming for a solid month without saying goodbye, and because you know what?
You didn’t call me, either, and…what are you doing?
” I asked, because he had shifted our bodies as I talked, bending one of his legs so I was cradled sideways in his lap facing Maya’s direction, his other leg as my backrest.
“Making sure you have what you need. A view of Maya and solid lumbar support.”
“Solid lumbar support?” I echoed incredulously.
I sounded offended. Like his consideration of my needs was a personal affront.
It wasn’t how I actually felt about it, but since the way I felt was marshmallow goo, offended was what I was going with.
Safer that way. “I could just sit on the ground, you know,” I pointed out.
He shrugged. “No need to get your jeans dirty.”
“I’m out here specifically to hunt salamanders with a seven-year-old,” I said. “Getting dirty is part of the whole mom gig.” I moved to slide off him, but he held me still. I twisted my neck to glare at him.
His eyes glinted back at me with silent laughter. He raised an eyebrow. “You’ve sat on my dick, Janie. I think you can handle sitting on my lap for a couple minutes.”
I bugged my eyes out and gasped theatrically, slapping my hand across my heart. “You can’t say things like that to me. I’m a mother.” But I couldn’t keep a straight face and let out a loud cackle.
“She can’t hear us.” He squinted in Maya’s direction and shook his head. “You’re a mom…shit. I didn’t see that coming at all.”
Annoyance stiffened my spine. Maya was the most important thing in the world to me, but that didn’t mean she was the only thing.
I was a mom, yes, but I was also a human being, dammit.
“Why, because we had a one-night stand? Right. Moms aren’t supposed to enjoy sex.
” I rolled my eyes. “I’ve got terrible news for you about how babies are made. Some kids even have siblings.”
He snickered. “I think it was the nipple piercings, actually. Can’t say I’ve met any moms with nipple piercings before.”
“That you know of,” I deadpanned. “I’ve always suspected Mrs. Christianson has a little something under her clothes.”
Jack looked aghast. “Our old biology teacher? She’s sixty.”
“I’ll let you in on a little secret, Jack.” I put my face inches from his. “Grandmas have sex, too.”
“Janie.”
I giggled and his gaze dropped to my mouth.
The tip of his tongue swiped the center of his bottom lip.
My whole body pulsed in response. Jack wasn’t going to kiss me, not with Maya hunting salamanders a few yards away.
He wasn’t brash or irresponsible. He was a strait-laced tier one operator who followed the rules.
Me, on the other hand. I was a problem. I knew better than to trust myself that close to Jack’s mouth.
I scrambled off his lap like it was on fire, pushed to my feet, and lifted my hand to my forehead like I was shielding my eyes from the sunlight when I was really just trying to hide my flushed cheeks. “I wonder if Maya has found anything yet.”
I heard him stand and the crunch of his footsteps behind me, but I still jumped a little when he said, “You know why I didn’t peg you as a mom? You didn’t mention Maya once. Most parents can’t shut up about their kids.”
Right. That. Slowly, I lowered my hand, but I still didn’t look at him.
“The situation with Maya’s dad is…messy.
But it’s my mess and none of that is her fault.
I don’t want her to be punished for my mistakes.
There’s a lot I’m not allowed to say, so I tend to not say anything at all.
It’s easier that way. So, yeah, I didn’t tell you.
” I blew out a breath and turned to face him, hugging my arms around my rib cage.
“Does it really matter, though? I mean, it’s not like we’re dating.
I get how that wouldn’t be fair to keep that kind of secret if we were actually in a relationship. But it was just a one-night stand.”
His head cocked. “Does it have to be?”
I blinked. “Well…yeah. Obviously.”
“It’s not obvious to me. So how about you explain it.”
“Because I’m a mom.”
“I’ve had it on good authority that moms have sex.” He smirked. “I don’t see a problem.”
I threw up my hands, exasperated. “Time is the problem, Jack. Not sex. Do you know how long it had been since I’d had sex when you walked into the Painted Cat that night?
Three years. I don’t have time to date. I barely have time to brush my teeth.
I really don’t have time for a whole ass relationship. ”
His gaze flicked from me to Maya and back to me again, his eyebrows knit into a dark, heavy slash. “I like you, Ace.”
It was a punch in the gut, how easily he said that. Showing his cards like he had nothing to hide. Maybe that was easy to do when you always had the winning hand. I imagined he didn’t get rejected often. Never would be my guess.
I shook my head. “You don’t even know me.” Because he didn’t. Not really. And if he did…well, he’d probably be disappointed.
“I know enough to know I want to know more.” I started to speak, but he cut me off.
“I’m not asking you on a date, so don’t waste your breath turning me down.
All I’m saying is let’s hang out sometime.
You. Me. Maya, if you’re okay with that.
The occasional one-night stand whenever you want.
” His lips quirked when I smacked his arm.
“Casual. No pressure. We’ll just get to know each other. ”
Get to know each other? I wasn’t sure how I felt about that. I narrowed my eyes. “Are you friend-zoning me?”
He snorted. “I hate that phrase. We’re not just friends, Janie. But if we can’t even be friends, we sure as fuck can’t be something more.”
I considered that. “All right,” I said finally, even though I wasn’t entirely sure what I was agreeing to.
Friendship with the hazy, far-off possibility of something more?
A good dicking every once in a while? Sure, why not.
It wasn’t like I was irrevocably signing a contract while I was too hopped up on painkillers to hold the pen steady. I could handle Jack Price.
“Mother,” Maya called. “I found one.”
“Coming,” I yelled back. I offered Jack a half smile. “Duty calls.”
I headed for Maya without looking back. I heard him move and figured he was heading back down the trail.
“Salamanders, huh,” he said, squatting down, and I realized he hadn’t left at all.
He was right there beside me.