19. Ava
Ava
Iwake up in Nick’s bed. Last night had been … weird. We ate, we watched TV, and then we went to bed. No sex. Just crawled into bed and snuggled together.
He’s not in bed when I open my eyes. I look around the room and can see the light on in the bathroom. He’s an early riser. And I need to get up as well. Staying at his house adds an extra fifteen minutes to my commute.
I sit up and am immediately hit with a feeling of ick. My hand goes to my stomach. I take a deep breath and blow it out. It helps—briefly.
When I stand, the wave of nausea rolls over me again. I sit back down.
“You’re up,” Nick says.
I look up and see him walking out of the bathroom with a towel around his waist. His hair is wet, and of course he looks like a damn model. And I’m sitting here feeling like death warmed over. I’m sure I look a little green.
“I’m up,” I say.
He frowns. “Are you okay?”
“Bad sushi,” I sigh. “I overdid it.”
He shrugs. “I feel fine.”
“I’ve always had a love hate relationship with sushi.”
“I’m sorry. Do you want to stay here today? Call in sick. I happen to know my company offers sick pay.”
I force a smile. “I’m good. Little coffee and toast, and I’ll be fine. It’s happened before. You think I would learn.”
“I’ll start coffee,” he says. He leans down and drops a kiss on my forehead. “I’ll bring it to you.”
It’s such a sweet, gentle touch. And the offer is even sweeter.
But my stomach doesn’t care that Nick is acting like a perfect gentleman.
I don’t think he wants to get too close. I do feel like things could get very messy and ugly in a hurry. He goes into the closet, and I muster the energy to go into the bathroom. A shower will help.
The shower is a godsend. I stand under the warm spray, letting it wash away the lingering nausea and the fog in my brain. I take deep breaths, feeling my body slowly relax. By the time I step out, toweling off my hair and wrapping myself in Nick’s too-big robe, I feel almost human again.
I twist my hair up into a messy bun and pad into the bedroom to get dressed. I dress in one of my business suits and put on a little makeup.
When I step into the kitchen, Nick is sipping his cup of coffee and holding his phone in hand.
“Feeling better?” he asks, handing me a mug.
“Much,” I say, taking a sip. The coffee is perfect—strong but not bitter. “This is really good.”
“Coffee always tastes better when you’ve had a rough start.”
I smile. “Definitely. Thank you. I’m going to get going.”
“I’ll see you tonight,” he says.
There’s suddenly an awkward moment.
He must pick up on it. He grins and steps forward. “Have a good day at work, honey,” he says before kissing me.
I laugh at the joke. “Not weird at all. I’ll see you tonight. Have a safe flight.”
He’s going up to San Francisco for a quick meeting this morning, and then tonight it’s showtime. We will paste on our happy couple personas and do our best to fool his parents.
Yes, I feel guilty, but I tell myself there’s no real harm done.
I drive to work, thinking about how we’ll act. What our story is when his parents inevitably ask when we got together and all the usual questions.
I’ve been feeling off all day. Nauseous, tired, and just …
not myself. At first, I chalk it up to stress.
Between work, Nick, and this whole fake engagement thing, it’s no wonder my body’s rebelling.
And it had to have been bad sushi. I’ve always had a sensitive stomach with sushi.
I think it’s the universe telling me I was not meant to eat raw fish.
Lesson learned. From this day forward, I’m done with sushi.
I collect my things and head to the meeting scheduled just before lunch. I sit down, sip my water and suddenly feel nauseous again. I power through it.
Until I can’t.
“Excuse me,” I say. I do my best to look dignified as I rush out of the room. Thankfully, the ladies’ room is across the hall.
I burst through the door and into the first stall. The wave of nausea crashes over me, and there’s no stopping it.
When I finally get a grip on myself, I lean against the wall.
“Ava?” a voice asks from outside the stall.
I recognize it. It’s one of the other women from my department. “Are you okay?” she asks.
“I’m fine. I’ll be there in just a minute.”
“The meeting is over,” she says. “I brought your things in here before the next group goes in. Can I get you anything?”
“No. Thank you. I’m fine. Bad sushi.”
“I understand. Been there, done that.”
“Thanks,” I say again.
I wait until she leaves before I leave the stall.
My binder is sitting on the counter, along with a stick of gum. She’s a Godsend. I quickly rinse my mouth before taking the piece of gum.
I stare at my reflection in the mirror. I look pale.
“It’s not bad sushi,” I whisper to my reflection.
I know it’s more than that.
I go straight to lunch and head to the nearest pharmacy, my heart pounding as I grab a pregnancy test off the shelf. I pay for it and stuff it into my purse.
The rest of the day drags on, the test burning a hole in my bag. I can’t focus on anything, my mind racing with possibilities. What if I am? What if I’m not? What will Nick say?
When I finally get back to Nick’s place, I head straight for the bathroom. He won’t be home for at least another hour. My hands are shaking as I unwrap the test. I follow the instructions, my heart pounding in my chest as I wait for the results.
Two lines.
I stare at the test, my mind going blank. Two lines. Pregnant.
I feel a surge of emotions—shock, fear, excitement.
“Holy shit!” I gasp.
I hear footsteps and panic. I quickly stuff the test into the trash and grab several tissues from the box and toss them in.
“Ava?” Nick calls out.
“In here!” I call back, my voice shaky.
I take a deep breath, trying to steady my nerves as I step out of the bathroom. Nick’s sitting on the bed, his tie loosened as he kicks off his shoes.
“Hey,” he says with a warm smile. “How was your day?”
“Fine,” I say, forcing a smile. “Just … busy.”
He nods, his eyes searching mine. “You okay? You look a little pale.”
“I’m fine,” I say quickly, stepping back. “Just tired. We should get ready for dinner.”
“Yeah. My parents are going to be here soon. My mom text me on my way from the airport.”
I walk into the closet and pull out the dress I had brought with this dinner in mind.
It’s a simple black dress, something elegant but understated.
I quickly do my makeup, adding extra blush to cover up my paleness.
I still can’t believe it’s real. Maybe it was a false positive.
I’ll take another test before I tell him.
By the time I’m done, Nick’s waiting for me in the living room, looking impossibly handsome in a tailored suit.
“Ready?” he asks, holding out his hand.
I nod, taking his hand and forcing another smile. “Ready.”
The restaurant is one of the nicest in the city, with soft lighting, white tablecloths, and a view of the ocean. Nick’s parents are already seated when we arrive. I feel a surge of nerves as we approach the table.
“Mom, Dad,” Nick says, his voice warm. “This is Ava.”
I smile, shaking their hands. “It’s so nice to finally meet you.”
Nick’s mom is elegant, with perfectly styled hair and a warm smile. His dad is more reserved, but he greets me with a firm handshake and a nod.
“It’s wonderful to meet you, Ava,” his mom says, her voice kind. “You’re Jessie’s sister, correct?”
“I am.” I nod.
“Which one?” his father asks.
“The youngest.”
“I think we met you once or twice,” his mother says. “You were just a little thing. What have you been up to?”
Nick smirks, pulling out my chair for me. “Guys, don’t give her the third degree. Let her have a drink first.”
Drink.
Shit.
I can’t drink wine.
When the waiter appears, Nick takes it upon himself to order me a glass. “Actually, can I have a club soda?” I ask quietly.
Nick looks at me.
“The sushi situation,” I say.
“Oh, babe.” He puts an arm around my shoulders. “You should have told me you were still under the weather.”
“I’m fine.”
He turns to his mother, who was watching the exchange. “We ordered sushi last night, and it didn’t sit right with Ava.”
His mother smiles. “I personally can’t stand the stuff. I like my food cooked.”
“Me too.” I smile in return.
I find myself relaxing as we talk. I play the role of the perfect fiancée, laughing at their jokes, asking about their lives, and sharing stories about my own family.
But the whole time, I can’t stop thinking about the test. About the two lines. About the life growing inside me. Nick’s baby.
At the end of the night, I feel like we pulled off the crime of the century.
“Ava, it was so nice to get to spend some time with you,” his mother says. “We have always loved Jessie. You’ll have to give me your mother’s number so we can talk. We’re going to be family soon!”
I keep my smile in place and glance up at Nick for help.
Nick steps in smoothly, wrapping an arm around my shoulders. “Mom, let’s not overwhelm Ava just yet. We’ve got plenty of time to plan.” He gives her a playful grin, and she laughs, waving a hand dismissively.
“Fine, fine,” she says, patting my arm. “But I’ll be calling your mother soon, Ava. I can’t wait to plan this wedding with you. We planned that graduation party for Nick and Jessie. Do you remember that? Oh my goodness, it was so fun!”
“I’ll make sure she knows,” I reply.
We say our goodbyes outside the restaurant. Nick’s parents climb into their car with promises to see us soon.
Nick turns to me, his expression softening. “You okay?” he asks, his voice low. “You seemed a little … off tonight.”
I force a smile, leaning into him. “Just tired,” I say. “And that sushi really did a number on me.”
He chuckles, pulling me closer as we start walking toward the car. “You know, you could’ve told me you weren’t feeling well earlier. We could’ve postponed dinner.”
I shake my head. “I’m fine. We did it. Your parents are officially off your back.”
“They’ll be in town all week,” he reminds me. “So, we still need to keep this going.”
“I understand.”
When we get back to the house, we go straight to bed. Nick pulls me into his arms, his lips brushing against mine.
“You were amazing tonight,” he says, his voice low.
I smile. “Thanks. Your parents are great.”
“They loved you. I knew they would.”
I want to tell him. I want to blurt out the truth, but I chicken out, leaning in to kiss him instead.
He responds immediately, his hands tangling in my hair as he pulls me closer. The kiss is intense, almost desperate. I feel a surge of guilt for not telling him.
The urgency in his kiss softens, becoming something slower, deeper. I feel the tension in my body ease as his touch shifts from demanding to tender. His lips leave mine, trailing down my jaw, my neck, and gently suckling.
“Nick,” I whisper, my fingers threading through his hair.
He hums softly against my skin, his hands roaming gently over my body. There’s a reverence in the way he touches me. Within seconds, he’s moving over me. My hands slide up his arms, gently squeezing his muscular biceps before I lift my gaze to his. He’s watching me as he moves inside me.
His eyes lock onto mine, dark and intense, as if he’s trying to read every thought, every secret I’m holding back.
I feel exposed, vulnerable, and yet so completely safe with him.
My breath catches as he moves, his rhythm deliberate and achingly tender.
His hands cradle my face, his thumbs brushing against my cheeks.
“Ava,” he murmurs, his voice raw with emotion.
He doesn’t have to say anything.
I get it.
My throat tightens, and I blink back the tears that threaten to spill. I want to tell him. I need to tell him. But the moment feels too perfect, too fragile to shatter with the weight of the truth.
Instead, I pull him closer, my nails lightly digging into his back as I surrender to the connection between us. His lips find mine again. We lose ourselves in each other.
He collapses beside me, pulling me into his arms. My head rests on his chest, listening to the steady beat of his heart. For a moment, I let myself believe that everything will be okay.
“Nick,” I whisper after a long silence.
“Hmm?” he responds drowsily.
I open my mouth to say it—to tell him about the test, about the baby—but the words catch in my throat. Instead, I press a kiss to his chest. “Goodnight.”
“Goodnight.”
He tightens his arms around me, kissing the top of my head.