26. Chapter Twenty-Six
Chapter Twenty-Six
Luna
Ihug my Ireland journal to my chest after making the final entry. Our trip has come to an end.
“Cole must be staying at the warehouse tonight,” Carson says as he pulls up in front of the cabin.
My heart sinks because I know I’m the reason for that.
I tuck the journal in my backpack and heave it over my shoulder as I get out of the truck. “Hopefully you’ll get a chance to talk to him tomorrow.”
“Yeah, it will work itself out.” He watches me grab my things. “So, um, are you going to stay with me, or …”
We both look at my van, sitting in the dark down by the trees.
“I hadn’t really thought about it, I guess.”
“I’ve kind of gotten used to sleeping with you next to me.”
“I don’t know. It doesn’t feel right, maybe you should talk to your brother first. I mean, it’s his home too.”
Carson’s focus turns to the cabin. It’s dark too.
The wind picks up and I hug myself. There is a chill in the air tonight. I look along the dark tree line, and shiver. Maybe I’ve gotten used to having Carson next to me too. I feel safe when he’s there.
“Maybe you could sleep in the van with me tonight.”
His entire face lights up. “Yeah, that’s a great idea and then I can talk to Cole about it when we go to the warehouse for supper tomorrow.”
“Sounds like a plan,” I tell him, my stomach full of butterflies because he’s agreed to stay in my van with me. I’m excited to sleep in my own bed. Plus, I like that he’s respecting his brother’s boundaries.
“I’ll just put my stuff inside quick, check on things and then I’ll be out.”
“Okay,” I say, doing a little skip before heading down toward the van.
He chuckles under his breath. I think both of us were a little anxious the closer we got home, neither of us knew what to expect when we got here.
Home.
When I get to my van, I find it unlocked. I’m sure I locked it when I left.
Maybe I should wait for Carson to go in.
The wind picks up, and I hear a faint sound of wind chimes in the distance.
“I’m being silly. I just forgot to lock up when we left.”
Hesitantly, I open the door. Nothing looks amiss.
When I get inside, everything is exactly as it was. The only thing that’s changed is me.
I move around turning on my lights and then changing into a fresh set of pajamas. I’m so tired. Today’s travel schedule was brutal.
The faint knock on the door brings a smile to my face. I’ve never had anyone sleep with me here, but I’m excited to invite Carson into my world.
He smiles wide as I open the door.
“Well, hello, stranger,” I say, stepping aside to let him in. “It’s been a while since I’ve seen you.”
He picks me up, closing the door and locking it behind us. Then he carries me to my bed and drops me in the center of it.
“It’s been a whole five minutes,” he replies.
I giggle as he climbs in beside me. I curl against him as he settles.
“Wow, this is way comfier than I thought it would be.”
He’s so big, I can tell it’s not as comfortable as he’s letting on.
“Thank you for staying here with me tonight. I’ll feel better about staying at the cabin after you’ve talked to your brother.”
“I’d sleep here forever if that’s what it takes to be next to you.”
I tip my head back to stare into his face. “You’re happy to be home.”
“I am, but I loved every minute of our trip.”
“Me too.”
He runs his fingers through my hair, holding my gaze. “We’re still on the same page.”
“Still on the same page,” I confirm.
“Good, because I want to finish the chapter, no, the entire book, with you.”
I smile sleepily, enjoying his soft touch and his warm body next to mine.
“I feel like a kid again. The club has an old Volkswagen van and my parents used to take Cole and me out camping with it.” He tucks his arm behind his head. “One of the first places we went to was the Grand Canyon.”
I rest my head over his chest, listening to the rumble of his voice as he speaks. It makes me feel like I’m floating.
“There’s nothing like seeing the sun rise over the Grand Canyon.”
“There really isn’t,” I agree.
“You’ve been?”
I smile against his skin. He forgets I’ve been traveling around the country for many, many years. “I’ve seen the sun rise and set in so many places it’s hard to remember them all.”
“Have you journaled your travels?” he asks.
“No, but I do have a map where I’ve marked all the places I’ve been.”
“That’s cool. We have this big map over at my parents’ house. They use push pins to mark their travels. I’ll show it to you sometime.”
We both get quiet after that. We’re exhausted, and before long, nature’s lullaby and the quiet chirp of crickets carry us both to sleep.
“I love you, Luna,” Carson whispers just as the sandman whisks me to another world.
“Luna, Luna, wake up. We don’t have much time,” my mom says, gently shaking me awake.
I sit upright in bed. “Mom, what are you doing here?” I ask sleepily.
She smiles and hugs me to her chest. “I love you, Luna.”
“I love you too,” I mumble, confused.
“This family needs you.”
“They need me?” I pull away to look into her eyes. “Mom, your eyes.”
Her eyes are glowing and filled with sunshine and rainbows.
“Teach them what you know,” she says, brushing my hair out of my eyes. She glances over her shoulder as if someone is waiting on her in the distance.
“I don’t understand.”
“They need you just as much as you will need them.”
Her eyes sparkle and it’s such a contrast to the darkness inside my van that I suddenly realize I’m dreaming.
“Mom,” I cry out, hugging her tightly, afraid she’ll vanish before I get a chance to tell her how much I love her. “I love you.”
“I love you too, baby.” Her voice is musical and full of love. I can feel it … hear it … see it … taste it. It’s incredible. I never want to forget it.
“I’ve got to go now, honey.”
“No, don’t go.” I tighten my grip on her, but it has the opposite effect, and slowly she slips from my embrace like sand in an hourglass.
Seconds pass as she dissolves in my arms. “I love you, Mom. Please don’t leave.”
“I love you, Luna. Take care of your new family and they will take care of you.”
The final grain of sand falls away, and all that is left is the scent of roses and an ache deep in my soul. “Mom …”
Carson gently nudges me awake. “Luna, Luna, you’ve been dreaming.”
My eyes open, and I find us both sitting upright in my bed.
“Where …” I look around confused. “Where did she go?”
“Who?”
“My mom.” But as the words leave my mouth, I remember. She’s dead. And for some reason, it hurts worse than the day I lost her.
Carson hugs me closely as if he can hear my internal thoughts.
And I grieve the woman who I loved more than life itself.
Something that I’ve never done.
I was afraid I would lose myself if I let go the way I needed to.
But Carson is here, holding all my bits and pieces together as I mourn her with all of my soul.
When my sobs slow, he gently lays us back against the mattress.
“I had a dream …”
“You don’t have to explain. I understand. Your mother came to visit you.”
I nod. I want to tell him about my dream, but I can’t. Not yet anyway. I’m drained. Honestly, it feels good, like I finally let go of something heavy I hadn’t realized I’d even been carrying.
“I love you, Carson,” I mumble, falling asleep before he even has a chance to respond.