Chapter 18 #2
I’d spent the last hour pacing the porch and watching for him, but I’d also drunk three cups of coffee while I waited, and finally I couldn’t wait for the bathroom any longer.
So of course it was while I had my hands full of dick that I heard the front door open and Jim say, “Welcome home! How was the drive?”
“Good,” Mason said, and then a moment later, “Is Cash here?”
I grinned and hurried to finish peeing and wash my hands.
I bolted down the stairs, coming to a stop at the bottom as I drank in the sight of him.
Mason looked good. And not just in the way pizza looked good when you were extra hungry.
He was genuinely attractive. His hair was pulled into a bun with a few loose tendrils framing his face, and his beard was longer than I’d seen it, but more than that, something in his attitude had changed in the few weeks he’d been gone.
A lot of the strain that he’d always carried around his eyes was gone and the constant furrow in his brow had disappeared.
And when he saw me, his entire face lit up in a way that made my heart trip and tumble over itself in the best way.
“You’re here,” I said, and then the words dried up in my throat as it hit me that he really was here for good.
These last few weeks I’d been bouncing between hope and caution, trying to temper my excitement just in case it didn’t work out for some reason.
What if Mason had gone back to Cincinnati and decided when he was there that it was too much hassle to upend his life for Goose Run and for me?
Even thinking that had flown in the face of everything I knew about him, but I’d had to try to prepare myself for the possibility just in case.
One of the first things I’d ever learned was that wanting things was the surest way to get your heart crushed.
And Mason wouldn’t do that to me—I knew that, but maybe I hadn’t fully believed it, not until he was here again and the wave of relief at seeing him was so powerful that it almost took me out at the knees.
I launched myself at him, pulling him into a hug and burying my face against his shoulder.
He hugged me back, his chest vibrating with what might have been laughter, but I didn’t care, because he was here.
He was here, and everything was going to be okay.
We stayed like that while I got hold of my feelings, and then Mason cupped my cheek, tilted my head back, and kissed me softly. And even though he was the one who’d left, it felt like he was welcoming me home.
I would have kept kissing him all day, except there was the clicking of claws against floorboards and Dog came barreling into the room, standing on his hind legs against Mason’s knees and whining excitedly.
Mason pulled away from me and gave me an apologetic smile before crouching down and scritching Dog under the chin.
“Hey, did you miss me, buddy? It’s okay, I’m back now.
For good.” He looked at me when he said it.
I couldn’t even be mad that Mason had stopped kissing me to say hello to his dog, because shit like that was what had drawn me to him in the first place.
I wasn’t sure I would have wanted someone who ignored his pet for the sake of kissing.
That wasn’t to say we weren’t locking Dog out of the bedroom tonight, because we totally were.
It had been a long three weeks, and I was greedy for Mason to touch me in a way that I only wanted from him and nobody else.
Sex was a little weird, but not weird like with tentacles or stuff.
It was weird because I was still mostly uncomfortable—not with the level of intimacy, but with the level of scrutiny.
I liked it better in the dark, I guessed.
Mason didn’t make a big deal out of my scars, but I knew he saw them.
I’d felt him trace the edges of them more than once.
And I wasn’t ashamed of the scars, but I didn’t want Mason to look at me and feel sorry for me.
I would have preferred for him not to notice them at all, but that was impossible.
So until they didn’t trip us both up just when we were trying to get hot and heavy—nothing killed the mood faster than a scar broadcasting loudly on all frequencies, “Hey, Mason! Check out this exciting new evidence of Cash’s abusive childhood!
”—then the dimmer switch was our friend.
It was a lot to work through, but that was okay.
I liked and wanted sex, and so did Mason, and it was okay that the guy I liked having sex with actually saw the parts of me I would have preferred to keep hidden.
Because I trusted Mason, and I knew his heart, and I’d seen his scars too—they weren’t visible like mine, but they were still there.
Mason straightened up again.
“I’m glad you’re home,” I whispered.
“I’m glad I am too,” he said and kissed me again.
Jim cleared his throat theatrically, and Mason gave a silent laugh that reverberated through his body and mine.
“Did I miss anything while I was away?” Mason asked, one arm still wrapped around my waist.
“Nothing that can’t wait,” Jim said. “Let’s get your bags upstairs.”
Between the three of us, we were able to take Mason’s suitcases up in one trip.
The spare room was still tiny, but it had been painted and the plastic storage boxes were gone, so it felt a little bit bigger.
We put the bags down and Jim looked around.
“It’s a tight squeeze, but you’ll be moving into my room soon enough, I guess. ”
“It feels like I’m kicking you out,” Mason said, a crease appearing in his brow.
“Nonsense. I’m more than ready to retire. And I want to see the country while I’m still fit enough to enjoy it,” Jim said. There was a twinkle in his eye when he added, “One thing I discovered on vacation was that ladies love a vet.”
Mason laughed, and his worried expression disappeared.
Jim crouched down, his knees clicking, and petted the top of Dog’s head. “I thought I’d take a ride over to visit Alan Springer. Dog can come too. He loves the truck, don’t you, boy?” Then, with all the subtlety of a brick through a window, he added, “I’ll be a couple of hours at least.”
“I’m sure Dog would enjoy that,” Mason said, a hint of laughter in his voice.
We went downstairs and Jim put a leash on Dog and took him outside. Dog’s tail was wagging so hard his whole back end was moving. He jumped up into the passenger seat of the truck without so much as a backward glance.
“Should I be insulted that Dog didn’t even miss me?” Mason asked as we stood on the porch and watched Jim drive away.
I leaned over and kissed his cheek. “I missed you. So much.”
Mason gave me a teasing smile and a look that made my heart beat faster. “I missed you too. Wanna come inside and I can show you how much?”
“Yeah,” I said, my voice catching.
We went inside and Mason locked the door behind us.
My stomach twisted with nerves, which was dumb because we’d already done this and I wanted to do it again.
But I’d read somewhere that the body couldn’t always tell the difference between excitement and fear, so I guessed this was one of those times.
And when Mason looked at me with so much warmth and joy in his gaze, that dumb knot in my stomach dissolved away into nothing.
I took Mason’s hand and led him upstairs.
We stripped out of our jeans and underwear. Mason stepped close and cupped my face in his hands, kissing me gently, like I was something precious. Then he stopped kissing me for long enough to close the curtains, shutting out the harsh daylight, and guided me over to the bed in the semidarkness.
I peeled off my shirt on the way.
Mason stripped out of his shirt as well, and then we got into bed and made out for a while, slow and lazy. We relearned each other with careful touches, each one stoking a low, simmering heat that danced between us.
I knew that eventually we’d take things further, but it wasn’t like there was any rush. It was enough for now having him here with me, real and solid and reassuring.
I’d missed him more than I had words to say.
I’d missed him when I walked Dog alone. I’d missed him when I ordered a single coffee at Gobble de Goose instead of getting one for him as well, or when I’d watched a movie without the warm weight of his body leaning against mine.
I’d missed him in all the small, everyday parts of life that he’d become a part of when I’d met him, slotting in so easily it was like he’d always been there.
And I’d missed moments like these too, that I’d never had with anyone else, and never wanted until him.
We kissed some more, bare legs brushing against each other, and the heat between us built from a simmer to a steady flame until I ached with need.
I finally moved things along by reaching down and wrapping a hand around Mason’s dick, stroking firmly to let him know I was down for more.
He responded by pressing a line of open-mouthed kisses down my throat, and I shivered at the rasp of his beard against my skin.
Mason rearranged us so I was straddling him, and then he reached between us and started to jerk us off, his grip firm, and it was so fucking perfect that I never wanted it to end, but at the same time heat coiled inside me, bringing me closer to the edge.
I thrust up into his hand a couple of times, and the added friction was enough to send my orgasm crashing over me without warning.
I came so hard that I saw stars.
I was dimly aware of Mason stroking his own dick before he tensed and came as well, letting out a ragged breath.
I collapsed against him in a boneless heap, burying my face in the curve of his shoulder as I floated slowly back to earth.
Mason wrapped an arm around me and pulled me close, and we lay there like that for a while in our own little bubble, ignoring everything except each other.
Eventually, Mason stirred, letting out a hum before he said, “I missed you so much.”
I rested my head on Mason’s chest and traced random patterns in his chest hair, listening to the steady thump of his heartbeat. I propped myself up on one elbow to face him and opened my mouth to tell him I’d missed him too and I was glad he was back.
Except at the sight of him all relaxed and sleepy, wearing a little half smile on his face, my heart gave a strange wobble.
I thought about how he’d taken both me and Dog in and cared for us without question, and about how he always checked in before he touched me, and about how he’d made sure to close the curtains because he knew I preferred to undress in the dark.
A wave of affection—more than affection—washed over me, and I found myself, for the first time in forever, speaking without weighing the words and counting the cost. These words, I couldn’t have kept in if I tried. They were too big. “I love you, Mason.”
Mason froze, and I had a second of quiet terror when I wondered if it was too soon to say it, but then his face split in a wide grin and he grabbed my face and kissed me hard, and when he pulled back he was still smiling. “I love you too, Cash.”
Happiness welled up inside me, too big to be contained, and I laughed. And then, just because it felt so fucking good, I said it again. “I love you.”
And you know what?
They were the easiest words I’d ever spoken.