Chapter 4
Chapter Four
Myles
A few minutes later the three of us are seated on our boards, bobbing out back of the breaking waves, waiting for the next set to come through. Bill, the videographer, is in the water nearby.
“Right, so, any feedback you have on fit, movement, anything you think can be adjusted, tell me. Bill will get some shots of us surfing, you know the drill.”
“Sounds good. Do you think we’ll be done in time for me to head home early? Aaron has a football match after school, and I promised Sal I’d try and get back in time.” Scott rolls his shoulder, stretching.
Aaron is Scott and his wife Sally’s eight-year-old son, and a bundle of mischief, just like his father.
Zach shakes his head. “You can’t break a promise to your woman, man. We’ll get this done.”
“Is that right?” I shoot Zach a glance. Jade is another of our sponsored surfers and a friend. What she and Zach get up to is their own business, but I don’t like seeing her being messed around. “That how you and Jade do things?”
Zach frowns. “If you’re talking about the girl in my room, Jade is cool with that. I might fuck around, but she knows she’s the one I love.”
“Jesus, Zach, another one? I don’t know how you get away with it,” says Scott. “Sal would have my balls if I ever did anything like that. Not that I’d want to.”
“She would, and so would I,” I say.
I’m not kidding, either. I was best man at Sally and Scott’s wedding, and we’ve all been friends a long time. Sally is gorgeous, all curves and laughter. I told Scott he was lucky when he married her, and I still believe it. I can only hope to meet someone similar one day, a true life-partner.
“You’re one to talk, Myles,” Zach says. “Which supermodel are you on now? I give it another month, tops. Maybe less. Have you ever even had a proper girlfriend?”
“Don’t be a dick.” I snap the words, nettled by his comment. The swell rises beneath me and I turn my board, lying flat and signalling the videographer.
“Watch yourself,” I hear Scott growl at Zach as the wave lifts me, propelling me forwards.
I pull into a crouch then stand, glad to be taken away from the conversation.
But as the wave curls into shore, taking me with it like a bird in flight, I have to fight my annoyance.
Zach doesn’t know about Cassandra, of course.
Not many people do. I should be over it, I suspect even Scott thinks I’m milking it, but there’s a fracture inside me that has not yet healed.
I carve across the water, turning my board top to bottom, hitting the lip of the wave, playing up for the camera.
As the wave dissipates I turn, pull out, and fall into deep blue, letting the rolling foam pass over me before emerging, refreshed.
The built-in hood on the wetsuit is working well, but I feel cold across my lower back.
Something to look into when we go back to the design team.
I pull myself onto my board and paddle back out, pausing to watch Zach pulling into a small barrel before shooting out in a cloud of spray, giving a thumbs-up to the camera.
Scott is still waiting out back, despite the waves rolling through. I know why he’s waiting.
“It’s fine,” I say when I reach him. “He doesn’t know.”
Scott sighs. “Yeah. He doesn’t. It’s been six years, Myles. I guess that’s why.”
“What are you saying?”
“That you’re my friend, and I know you want to be with someone. To have what me and Sal have. So, maybe it’s time to take a look at what’s out there. Or what’s right in front of you.”
“Right in front of me?”
“Have you even thought about Katya since we’ve been here?”
“I’m ending it with her.”
“So, no, then? But you’ve mentioned Zara’s name about ten times this morning alone.”
“She’s my assistant. I needed to talk to her.”
“You could do worse.”
“Are you suggesting I ask her out?” My heart leaps at the thought. I push the feelings back down again. “First of all, she works for me, which makes it an automatic no-go zone. And secondly, Zara would never go for it.”
“Who’s Zara?” Zach paddles up next to me. He sits on his board and pulls his hood back, rubbing his hand through the spikes of his blond hair. “Not sure how I feel about the hood by the way. Could it be detachable?”
“I’ll think about it. Thanks.”
“Zara is Myles’s assistant while Eloise is away. She’s also gorgeous.”
I blink. Scott never usually comments on how other women look.
Zach grins. “That right? Maybe I’ll swing by the office tomorrow, say hello to her.”
“You better fucking not.” The words are instinctive, out before I can stop them.
Scott coughs.
“What?” I snap.
“You can’t have it both ways. Either you want her, in which case you should ask her out, or you don’t, so you can let other guys have a go.”
“Zach isn’t ‘other guys’. And he has a girlfriend, something you both seem to forget whenever it’s convenient.”
I take a breath, gathering myself, putting the walls back up.
I know Scott is pushing me, trying to get a reaction.
This isn’t how he usually acts. And I know why, of course I do.
I want Zara. I have done for a while. The thought of Zach turning his legendary charm on her makes me sick.
But I don’t want to look too closely at the reasons why.
I turn my board, lying down to catch another wave. “Ifyou idiots don’t have anything better to talk about, I’m out of here.”
Before they can say anything else, I’m gone.
Zara
It’s quiet in the office without Myles. He’s been away before, but for some reason I’m missing his presence more than usual. I take another sip of coffee and return to the letter I’m drafting. Then my fantasy from the other night rolls over me, heat coming to my cheeks.
Oh my God. I glance towards his closed office door, as though he might be in there and somehow able to read my thoughts.
I’d die if he, or anyone ever found out.
I can barely even admit to myself that I had a sex fantasy about my boss.
It was just some sort of weird aberration, too much work on my mind or something.
I wrench my thoughts back to Dean, to the flicker of joy in my stomach whenever I think about seeing him next week.
I wonder how he’ll do it. Whether he’ll take me out to a restaurant, or maybe up to Hampstead Heath, or even the London Eye.
I don’t care; wherever he proposes will be perfect.
I wish Mum was here, so I could talk to her about it. I’ve already told Eloise, and I know she’s happy for me, even if there was a hint of hesitation in her voice. I get it. Dean has been away for longer than I spent with him. But I just know we’re meant to be together.
“I know he’s not here!”
I jump, shaken from my reverie. Then I hear Alice from reception.
“If you leave it with me, I can make sure he gets it.”
Oh no.
“I’m just dropping something off, that’s all. Don’t you worry.”
I stand up, pushing my chair out. I need to deal with this. But before I can get out from behind my desk, Katya appears. She’s holding a gift bag and a large envelope.
I brace myself, expecting her to shove them at me and demand I send them overnight to Uzbekistan or something ridiculous. But she smiles at me, then puts the gift bag on my desk. I’m so surprised I almost fall over.
“Zara.” She trails out the last syllable, still smiling. It’s slightly terrifying. “Just the person I want to see.”
“You want to see… me?” Probably wants me to fly her to Cornwall or something.
“Yes.” Katya perches on the edge of my desk, her long perfect legs, encased in skintight leather and spike heels, crossed. Her cashmere sweater slips from one creamy shoulder as she pouts at me and tosses her hair. “I want to apologise.”
My mouth opens and shuts, but nothing comes out.
“Myles says,” she traces circles on the desk with one long finger, “he says I need to be nicer to you. And I know I can be… passionate about things at times.”
Yeah, things like shoes and dry cleaning. I hold my tongue, though.
“It’s just, I think if I’m going to be around for a while,” she shrugs, “I want you to know that I appreciate you, and all that you do for him.”
Around for a while? I swallow. Great. That’s so great for Myles. I rub at my chest. “Well, thanks.” My voice is strangled.
“No, thank you.” She sounds serious but I’m still tense, as though she’s a shark who might turn and bite at any moment. “I don’t mean to be so difficult. Anyway, this is for you.”
“For me?”
She pushes the gift bag towards me. It’s gold and spangly, fastened with a floppy silk ribbon. Katya nods towards it. Oh. It seems she wants me to open it now.
I pull at the ribbon, then reach inside the bag. Inside is an orange box, embossed with the Louis Vuitton logo. Holy shit. Maybe it’s just an empty box. But Katya nods at me, smiling what looks like an actual genuine smile. She really is stunning. It’s ridiculous.
I open the box to reveal a wallet, nestled in a matching dust bag. I look at it, then at her. “This is for me?”
“Like I say, just as a thank you.” Her smile fades, slightly. “I just… It seems important to Myles that you’re happy, so I want you to be happy.”
“It does?” He’s been a bit nicer lately, but I can’t shake the feeling that something about me annoys him intensely.
I know he told Katya not to give me things to do, but I doubt very much that my happiness came up in conversation between them.
“I mean, thank you. This is too much, though. Honestly. You didn’t have to do this. ”
Katya is frowning now. More familiar ground. But there’s something else about her, a sort of vulnerability. “What do you think he really wants?”
“I’m sorry?”
“Myles.” She’s still frowning, looking absolutely beautiful while doing so. “What does he want? In a woman?”
I shake my head, slowly. “I honestly have no idea. I haven’t been working with him that long.” Not that any amount of time would make a difference. I think Myles would rather poke himself in the eye than discuss his preferences in women with me.
“I wish I knew.” She sounds wistful, now. “We break up a lot. But he always comes back to me. I just wish I knew how to keep him.”
I gape at her. How anyone who looks like she does could ever worry about keeping a man is beyond me. I close my mouth before she notices.
She shakes herself, a sexy little shimmy, then grins at me again. “Maybe we should have coffee sometime? I would like us to be friends.”
Okay. Maybe I’m still asleep and this is some sort of weird dream. “Uh, sure,” I say.
“Okay.” She pats me on the hand. “Also, can you please put this on Myles’s desk for me?” She hands me the envelope. A faint scent of perfume wafts from it and, when I turn it over, it’s sealed with a glittery wax seal embossed with a ‘K’. Katya winks. “No peeking, now.”
This has to be a dream, surely? But before I can say anything else, Katya slides from my desk and wanders off, waving as she goes. I stand there, enveloped in a cloud of expensive perfume, a Louis Vuitton wallet on my desk, as though I’ve just had a visit from a very wealthy fairy godmother.
After a few moments I snap out of it. Maybe she’ll ask me for coffee, maybe she won’t. But it was extraordinary to be around her when she was being nice. For the first time, I can kind of see what Myles sees in her. She must be devastating when she turns her full charm on someone.
I sit down and put the wallet and box in my desk drawer. Then I return to my letter, wondering why my chest aches so much.