Chapter 15 – RHETT #2
I wince. That one stings like a motherfucker.
“That’s my fault too. I guess. I don’t know anymore.
I tried with him, but he’s not an asshole.
Selfish? Yes. I won’t deny that. He was raised by a lying, manipulative mother who loved extorting money from me and using him however she needed to get it.
I was pushed out a lot, barely able to attend his birthday parties that I paid for.
I’m not here to defend him to you because that would be wrong.
But he’s my son, and that’ll never change.
I don’t condone what he did to you—not for a fucking second—and the man in me wants to kick his ass for it, which is why I won’t punish your brothers.
I stand by my statement from the night we met.
But I love him. He’s my kid. It just hasn’t always been easy to be his dad. ”
She growls and shoves me again. “Stop! I need to hate you.”
I snag her hands and hold them, not wanting to let her go. What is it about her I can’t shake? “I got that, but the thought of you hating me is like adding insult to injury, and I’m not sure I have the stomach for it.”
She jerks her hands, and I release them.
“Is he going to play for the team?”
“Your father and I have a video meeting tomorrow morning to discuss all of this.”
Her eyes narrow. “That’s a non-answer.”
I sigh. “It’s the best I’ve got for you, Quinn.”
“I told them I don’t care if he does.”
That hits me in a not-so-great way, and my eyes narrow. “Why is that?”
“Because he dropped out of my life four years ago. Whether he’s on the team or not is inconsequential.”
“You’d have to see him on the days you’re here.”
She drops her weight onto her other foot. “Not really. I don’t interact with the players beyond my family unless they’re hurt, and I can promise you that Russel Jones doesn’t want me as his doctor if that happens.”
“He said you weren’t the type of woman who gave out second chances. Or something like that.”
“I’m not.”
My hands meet my hips, and I lower my head so she can’t see my ridiculous disappointment. I almost scoff. Disappointment over what? Yet she completely misreads my expression.
“You want me to get back together with him?”
A current of jealousy zings through me, tightening my jaw.
“No. I don’t.” Not ever. The thought makes me crazy, and I don’t like it.
If he loves her and wants a second chance and she’s willing to give it to him, he should have it.
I want his happiness above my own, but fuck my life, I’d never be okay with him having her when I can’t.
“Then what do you want?”
I laugh. It can’t be helped. “Baby girl, I’ve spent the last four months telling you exactly what I want. Unfortunately, the choice is no longer mine.”
She steps into me until her chest is practically against mine. All I see are her green eyes. Those blazing emeralds and her perfect upturned nose dotted with adorable freckles.
“What about what I want?”
My heart picks up too many beats. I’m more than a little winded.
I can’t ask. I know I can’t. But… “What do you want?” My voice is rough and crackly.
She rises onto the balls of her feet and places her hands on my shoulders so she can whisper in my ear. “To not have all my decisions dictated to me by men.”
My eyes close at the feel of her. Her tits against my chest, her hands on my skin, her warm breath by my ear, her sass and fire making me smile despite everything. “It’s not that simple, and you know it.”
“Is that why your heart is beating so fast?”
Without conscious thought, my hand scoops the back of her head, and I shift her mouth two inches straight onto mine.
I kiss her like I’ve never kissed a woman before.
With heat and impatience and guilt and a delicious swirl of tongues and forbidden.
Pleasure spreads through me like a toxin, reminding me just how long I’ve been waiting for this moment. Waiting to feel her again.
I want her with a desperation I hardly recognize in myself.
My hand winds into her hair, and I make a fist before I give it a gentle tug.
She moans, the sound hitting every cell in my body and making my cock beg for mercy.
It’s rubbing against her hip, and I don’t know how to stop it.
This towel is on life support. One small move and it’s gone for good along with what’s left of my integrity.
Inherently, I know this only ends one way. Tragically. Someone will get hurt, and that hurt will span beyond boundaries. It’ll impact everything. This kiss will impact everything.
It’s why I force myself to rip away from her, my breathing hard and fast, my head spinning. My forehead falls to hers as I work to catch my breath. “Quinn.”
It’s all I can manage. Her name.
I capture her bottom lip between my teeth and scrape it.
Hard. More than a little riled with everything.
I want to kiss her. I want to taste her.
I want to watch her as she comes for me.
Then I want her in my bed with her naked, sleepy body beside mine.
I want to trail my fingers up and down her spine and watch as she falls asleep in my arms.
I kiss her again. A deep plunging of tongues and heedless lips that don’t know how to stop. She makes me fucking burn, and when I tear away from her, I can feel that burn on my lips. I’m making so many mistakes this week, I’ve already lost count.
I close my eyes and point in the general direction of the door. “You need to leave.”
Her nails rake down my neck and capture my shoulder blades. “I can’t when your hand is up my shirt.”
“What?”
I pull back and almost laugh at myself. Because yeah, my hand is up her shirt, pressed against the flat of her stomach just beneath her bra. At the same time I realize that, the knot in my towel finally gives way, and it plummets to the floor at my feet.
I sigh and stare woefully down as my cock slaps my lower abs. “You’re not helping.”
Quinn giggles. “But look how cute and excited it is.”
“Cute?” My eyebrows shoot up. “Don’t call him cute.”
She grips my dick and gives it a hard squeeze before she pets it. “You like it when I call you cute, don’t you?”
I groan, my teeth clenching even when she has me seeing stars from one squeeze. “Quinn. For fuck’s sake. He’s not a puppy.” Though he’s certainly acting like one for her now. Her petting my dick and calling it cute shouldn’t make me harder, but naturally it does.
“Here, Coach. Let me help.” She bends and picks up my towel, but because she’s the world’s sexiest temptress, she licks the underside of my cock on her way up.
“Shit,” I hiss, my eyes rolling back into my head.
“Oops. Sorry.”
“I guess you still have time for that,” I quip, reminding her of our hotel room conversation the morning after I had her.
I grab the towel from her and cover myself back up.
My clothes are in the bathroom, and I need to get changed.
We’re at work. Anyone could walk in though it’s late in the afternoon on a Friday.
“I came in here to yell at you.”
“You did that,” I remind her. “Keep yelling if you want. I’m getting dressed.”
“Bummer.”
“Necessity.”
I go into the bathroom, toss the towel on the floor, and slip on my boxer briefs, T-shirt, and shorts. I run my hands through my hair and exit the bathroom, but I don’t go far. I lean against the wall near the door to keep as much space between us as possible.
“You didn’t keep yelling.”
She plays with her bottom lip between her thumb and forefinger. “I don’t know what to say at this point.”
I fold my arms and press harder into the wall. “I don’t either. It’s not what I wanted or had planned. Believe me about that.”
“But it can’t happen.”
It’s not a question. It’s a statement, but I nod all the same, even as my stomach sinks and my chest aches with something like loss. I thought she was the woman something real could happen with. At the very least, I wanted the opportunity to find out.
“See you on Monday, Coach.”
She heads for the door, and I don’t stop her. I don’t call after. I don’t jog the dozen steps, grab her arm, spin her back around, and kiss her.
I let her go.
Reminding myself this is how it has to be. Even if spending ten minutes with her was the best part of my week.