7. Shiloh #2
He nods. “Do you need anything else?” he asks.
“Um, I … are you sure?” I ask him, my eyes starting to water. It doesn’t matter that I blink a thousand times to keep them back because one slips past the gates.
He rubs his mustache and looks away. “Yeah, Shiloh, I’m sure. Goodnight.”
“Ledger?”
His brow ticks up.
“Thank you for everything. Really.”
“Don’t mention it. Seriously, don’t say a word. Okay?”
I nod.
He sighs and walks past me, leaving me in the dark kitchen. There’s a light on above the sink, and it’s spotless. The only things sitting on the counter are a coffee maker and a toaster. He doesn’t even have mail out.
Turning to go back to my room, I stop and look at the living room.
It’s the same way. Simple and clean. There’s a blanket across the back of the couch, and there’s a love seat in front of the windows.
The coffee table sits in the center with a half-worked puzzle on it.
Against the wall is an entertainment cabinet framed around the TV with shelves full of books and picture frames.
I glance down the hall, and his bedroom door is closed. Sneaking over to the shelves, there are various photos of Ledger and members of his family. I went to high school with all the Hayes kids, even their cousin Cooper.
There’s a picture of Cooper, his daughter Naomi, and a woman relatively new to town. I haven’t met her personally, but I know she’s with Cooper. I’ve seen them at the Wooden Cowboy, walking past the diner, or he’s with her at the flower shop. Their family is so beautiful.
My heart twists, and I head back to my room.
I love my father, and I’ll be forever grateful to him for everything he sacrificed for me.
When I was younger, I always wanted more siblings, a big family.
Something about that always sounded great to me.
But it was only me and Dad. For a while, I thought Grey and I would have the family neither of us did.
I still don’t know what I was thinking there.
I grab my PJs and head into the bathroom, setting the ice pack on the counter.
I look around the bathroom and smile. There is no way Ledger painted this bathroom because it is an adorable color, pink.
The towels are also pink with gaudy lace on the edges.
Above the sink is a little sign that says You’re beautiful, with a lipstick print next to the cute scrawl.
The bathroom is so clean I feel like I can actually enjoy myself in it, though the one at the inn wasn’t terrible, but I didn’t want to spend much time in there either.
After I clean myself up and get dressed, it takes me a minute to wiggle myself onto the bed. But once I get under the covers with an ice pack, I’m wide awake, and the pain has finally abated so much I feel like I can breathe.
Why would he let me stay here?
It doesn’t make any sense, especially after tonight.
He’s putting himself in a terrible position in many ways.
It doesn’t matter that we have known of each other for years.
We don’t know each other. Yet he helped me from Grey, opened his home to me, and has done more than any man ever has — aside from my father.
In fact, he reminds me of my dad. He’d give you the shirt off his back if you’d ask.
It’s why we got into debt when I was young. That’s yet another reason why I was happy to see him leave Paxton and go down to Arizona. He was free from the debt and the burden of me.
Grabbing my phone off the nightstand, I send a text to my dad telling him I miss him and set my alarm for my shift in the morning. I should have insisted that I follow Ledger to his house so I wouldn’t have to walk, but it’s not far. I can deal.
Then it hit me. It’s possible he wanted to drive me because he didn’t want anyone to see my car in front of his house. The upstanding cowboy sheriff and the criminal living with him isn’t a good look. I don’t like it, but it’s fair and smart.
I open my banking app and double-check the amount before I make a small payment on my credit card. It’s because of the debt my dad dealt with that I hate accruing any, even if it’s for a valid reason. I don’t want to fall into that hole.
What’s my next move? There is the option to go down to Arizona. But I’ve never lived on my own. Maybe it would be smart to try it. But that would mean I need money to get an apartment, and I definitely don’t have that in my bank account right now.
Maybe I should be asking myself how long Ledger will let me stay.
I’m not one to overstay my welcome, but he never said a word about one night or a week.
I cringe at the thought, but maybe I can work out a deal at the inn for a weekly rate.
I could eat at the diner, since we get a free meal, and I could live off PB&J’s and cans of tuna.
If I double my shifts at the Wooden Cowboy and pick up anything at the diner, it’s possible that I could scrape enough together for the first month’s rent.
Yeah, I can do that.
I close my eyes, take a deep breath, and it feels like the adrenaline immediately drops from my body.
Everything comes crashing down. I almost killed Grey.
I could have killed him. Hot tears pour from me as I stifle my cries into my pillow, trying not to disturb Ledger.
I have made a mess of my life. My first mistake was trusting Grey. Maybe my second was trusting myself.