Chapter 26
CHAPTER TWENTY-SIX
JAX
I’m glad I spent Sunday on my own, because now, I’m able to bring home half my weight in all kinds of sweets.
There are different candies, cookies, treats, and more to fulfill my sweet-tooth needs, and I’m in hog heaven.
Bringing home snacks from other countries to enjoy, when I get back, will have to be a new thing I do.
We got back to Seattle today, and it’s awkward.
I can tell there’s something he wants to say, but I’m afraid to hear it.
I don’t want bullshit excuses. I don’t want to hear we were a mistake.
I just—there are too many variables. So instead, I’m doing what any other scared person would do and that’s borderline hiding.
It’s what I’ve done since our conversation, keeping interaction strictly professional and not allowing a moment for any other conversation.
Now, I’m just lying in my sad apartment, all too quiet, wishing I was back on a beach or drinking something fruity at some random bar.
Rio was absolutely amazing, and the only reason I was able to afford to go was thanks to Kai and this job. I just need to suck it up. Be civil, be the best damn personal assistant someone could be, and don’t fuck the boss.
The time change is just enough that, on this Monday morning, I’m fucking dragging more than normal.
Even after bringing home coffee beans, I still couldn’t help stopping by my local spot for that fresh hit.
The sweet ube flavor coats my tongue, but there’s definitely a different appreciation, since I’ve been drinking the really good stuff lately.
With my drink in hand and all the caffeine I can muster without giving myself heart palpations, I drive to work.
I want to get there a little earlier than normal so I have plenty of time to prepare for the days’ worth of meetings and my lack of presence recently.
We all know Kai likes the notes in-hand before he walks through the door, so that needs to be done.
I refuse to give him any reason to fire me.
As I pull in, though, the first thing I see is his car. Not even running, no. Instead, it’s parked and abandoned, which can only mean one thing: he’s already inside.
My head whips back and forth between my watch and the time being displayed on the dash. Why is he here so early?
There are no other cars; we’re the only ones here right now.
I park my car and take a few deep breaths, swapping between chewing my lip and sipping my coffee before I finally get out of the car and make my way upstairs.
It’s eerily quiet; it feels as if I have to tiptoe around to not break the peace. There’s not even any overhead lights on as I walk past desks and around the corner.
Of course, the only place with fluorescent light is his office, only partially visible through the clouded glass.
I stand there, trying to somehow see inside and gauge what it’s going to be like when I enter the room, when his deep voice booms out.
“I can see your shadow out there. It’s your office too. Come in.”
I take a deep breath and open the door, pausing to take him in. His back is to me, just like he was that first day, the sunrise stretching painting the sky a pretty orange. It basks him in a glow I wish I could take a picture of—he’s that fucking gorgeous. It makes my mouth water.
“I’m glad you’re here early. We can chat.”
He turns to face me now, his brown eyes boring into me. He looks angelic with the sun now behind him. A perfect glow.
“Listen, Kai—”
“No, you listen.” His hands land loudly on his desk, really drawing his point. “I’m tired of this miscommunication shit, Jax. Sit down and shut up. Please. Respectfully.”
I sit down, too stunned to speak.
“When I brought up that conversation in Rio, I had no clue where it was going to lead. I had no fucking clue what you were talking about, Jax. I wracked my brain for days on end, and do you know what I finally did?” He pauses for a moment, but I have no fucking clue.
“I called those people I was with. I haven’t talked to them basically since I graduated, and I still fucking called.
Out of all of them, one person remembered.
And do you know what it was about?” Once again, he pauses, but I’ve still got nothing, “It was about how fucking attractive you are. How fucking good you looked that night. Not anything bad. Not anything derogatory in the slightest. But you wouldn’t fucking listen to me and give me the benefit of the doubt. ”
Tears fill my eyes, and I once again find myself biting my lip. What do you mean I’ve literally been thinking the worst all this time? My eyes fall, unable to look at him anymore. There’s been years wasted, all because I was too insecure. That’s what this all leads to, right?
The tears spill from my eyes, but a finger under my chin has my gaze shifting up, right into his face. He’s squatting in front of me, his thumb wiping the tracks from under my eyes.
“Jax, this…what we have? I truly think it’s something special.
I’ve thought you've always been the one who got away. I’d catch myself thinking about where you might be, what you might be doing.
If you were happy, if you had found someone else.
And imagine my surprise when all the fucking stupid pieces fell into place, and here you were.
” He leans forward and softly presses his lips against mine.
It’s so soft, I barely recognize they’re there, but the heat spreading throughout my body proves just how electric even that small touch can be.
“Jax, we could do this. We could try. We could do all the things we wanted. We can make up for lost time.” His lips find mine again; he grabs the coffee cup out of my hand and sets it on the coffee table beside us as the kiss deepens.
It’s no longer that soft peck, instead something much more all-consuming, like the last however many years needs to be made up for right now.
This may be a good place to start, though.