Chapter 38 Emmy
Chapter 38
That’s a Josie-level-terrible suggestion!
Emmy
RHETT CASTLE DOESN’T look that much different, just older and more distinguished. His hair is way too black, meaning he dyes it, but it falls in the same thick, tousled way I recognize from brushing Peyton’s hair almost every morning for the past twelve years.
Jason’s arms tighten around me even as the shock plays across his face. Apparently, he didn’t know Margarita was dating Rhett, either.
A noise escapes me that’s something between a choke and a whimper.
“Emmy, it’s okay.” He rubs my arms. “Take a breath. Come on. Do it with me.”
I try to breathe with him. My whole body feels like it’s shaking, but on the inside.
“You’re okay. Say it.”
“I’m not okay,” I gasp. “I’m going to spontaneously combust!”
“You’re not going to spontaneously combust. I promise. You’re okay. Say it.”
“I’m okay.”
It sort of works. I don’t burst into flames, and I muster the courage to peek around his shoulder. Margarita and Rhett are still there, mingling. Only ten feet away, Peyton is holding Mattie’s hands, dancing with his little feet on hers.
“I can’t do this right now. He’s the father of my child. And she’s here! And neither of them knows it!”
“Maybe we should go say hello.”
I pull back from him with a horrified noise. “That’s the worst suggestion ever! That’s a Josie-level-terrible suggestion!”
“You think you’re going to avoid him forever?”
“Yes!” I swivel my head, desperately searching for an exit through the throng.
“Emmy, this crowd is here for you. You’ve earned this! Don’t let a guy you haven’t thought about for over a decade ruin it.”
It’s not true that I haven’t thought about Rhett. Every time I looked at my daughter and saw a little girl without a dad to love her, I thought about him. Every time I ended a relationship because I didn’t trust the guy to do right by my daughter, I thought about him.
My voice is small. “What if I tell him and he doesn’t want anything to do with her? What if he doesn’t believe me? What if he disappoints her? Hurts her?”
“You don’t have to tell him anything right now. All I’m suggesting is that we go say hello.”
“Hello, Emmy. Hello, Jason.”
I jump. In typical Margarita fashion, she appears at our side, soundlessly, like a pregnant wraith heavy with an enormous wraith baby. I don’t want to, but now I’m forced to face her enigmatic smile and him .
“Hello, Margarita,” I say. “You look beautiful. How are you feeling?” Dang it! Even after she posts half-naked pictures of me all over the internet, I’m still starstruck by this woman.
She doesn’t answer. Instead, she turns to the man beside her. “This is Rhett Castle. Rhett, you know Jason, and this is Emmy.”
Rhett’s smile is one I can’t read. “Ah, the infamous Emmy Ellison! We’ve actually met. Congratulations, by the way. You’ve come a long way.”
I try to say Thank you , but it won’t come out. The words that want to come instead are, You have a daughter, Rhett. She’s ours, and she’s here, just over there, and I know she would love to meet you and know you and have some kind of relationship with you. So what’s your opinion on that?
“She’s earned it.” Jason takes my hand and gives it a squeeze.
Margarita’s smile is slightly less enigmatic and more uncomfortable. Rhett has obviously been following me on the news, but I’m not sure he’s told Margarita about us. Does he know I have a daughter? Does he suspect she’s his? I don’t think so. If he did, his face wouldn’t be so smug.
“You must be very happy,” Rhett says to me. “I heard Miles made some magic out of that gummy little romance novel you wrote.”
I’m just getting some strength back in my legs when the words sink in. Oh, hell to the no! He did not just call my book “gummy.” What does that even mean?
“I’m glad we’re getting a chance to chat,” he continues. “Last time I saw you, I don’t know how many years ago, you were this overzealous college girl trying so hard. It was adorable.”
His words, the set of his jaw, the way he tugs on his lapels—all of it drags me back through the years to that day. Suddenly, I’m that overzealous college girl all over again, feeling small and used.
He goes on. “Somehow in the last decade, you figured out some great formula. Write a book—it doesn’t have to be great, just write it. Build some crazy hashtag campaign around it. Then hook yourself a handsome movie star to help you promote it. I don’t know how you did it, Emmy, but congratulations, girl! You managed to elbow your way into Hollywood despite everything. I never would’ve expected it.”
Rhett’s smile is bland. He can’t even emotionally invest in attacking me. I swallow hard. There’s a break in the crowd to the left. I could make a beeline for it. Forget Jason’s offer. Forget Hollywood. Forget telling Rhett about Peyton, and Peyton about Rhett.
Except something odd is happening. I have no desire to run, not even a little bit, because the voice I’m hearing—Rhett’s voice—is all too familiar. It’s been echoing in my head for thirteen years, and frankly, I’m sick of it.
Jason said I belong here, and the people who came out tonight to see us confirmed it. Josie said my problem is that nothing is ever enough. Now I know why. I’ve been dosing myself with Rhett Castle’s poison every day since I met him, and apparently doing a way better job of it than he ever could. I let this man’s opinion of me define me for thirteen years. And that’s extra sad because he’s not even a major player in my story. He’s a redshirt. And I let him steal the show.
Not anymore.
A chuckle escapes me as I lift my chin. “Thank you, Rhett, for reminding me how naive I was back then, and also for accusing me of cheating my way into Hollywood with a mediocre book and a great marketing campaign. Regardless, I’m enjoying being a bestselling author with a movie deal and a huge career ahead of me. Hashtag Celebrity Crush has been a dream come true, and it’s also given me a chance to meet some amazing and talented people. Yes, there’s been some drama”—my eyes flick to Margarita—“but I never meant to hurt anyone. So, if I did, I hope they’ll forgive me.”
For a second, Margarita’s mouth forms something that’s not a smile of forgiveness but also not a withering frown. I’ll take it as a victory. But that was the easy part.
I glance over to where Peyton is dancing with Mattie and Josie. Beautiful in her lanky tweenness, she’s a magical creature you want to protect from all the ugly things of the world. An elf. A sprite. A skittish, ephemeral thing. It’s all I can do not to cry as I say the next words because she’s not bulletproof, either, and she shouldn’t have to be.
“It was actually thirteen years ago, Rhett, to be exact, when we met at that party. The reason I know this is because that night changed my life in a big way. I didn’t have the guts to tell you when I should have, but I’m telling you now.”
I point semi-discreetly in Peyton’s direction. I expect Rhett will get my meaning since they look so much alike. Jason nods once at me in encouragement. Meanwhile, Rhett’s smug countenance dissolves into an expression I don’t think he can control, all his load-bearing walls falling, one by one.
I suck in a breath. “Her name is Peyton. She’s twelve years old. She’s an amazing kid who is good at everything she does, whether it takes her one try or a hundred thousand tries to get there. She’s sweet and caring and funny, and she’s the best person I’ve ever met. And oh crap, she’s coming over here.”
Peyton has noticed all our eyes on her and, of course, the fact that the beautiful and talented Margarita Ayala is part of the group. I pull her into a hug as she approaches, and Mattie wraps himself around Margarita’s leg.
“I love all your movies,” Peyton says to Margarita, eyes and braces shining. “I’ve always wanted to meet you.”
Margarita smiles and thanks her. Then Peyton looks at Rhett.
My heart jumps. Here goes nothing. “Peyton, honey, this is Rhett Castle, big-shot Hollywood director… or producer now, I should say. He…” Oh God, how am I going to do this? “He wants to talk to you about movies,” I finish.
“Hi,” Peyton says shyly.
My breath is trapped in my lungs, throbbing and burning. I’m terrified Rhett is going to choke. Or say something stupid. Or react badly. He was an ass thirteen years ago, and from what I’ve seen today, I doubt he’s changed. But if he hurts my daughter right now, I swear to God and Tom Hanks, I’ll pull a Jason Connor and punch him in the face.
Rhett lifts his arms halfway, tentative. “Peyton, wow.” It’s the softest I’ve ever heard him speak. “It’s so nice to meet you.”
“It’s nice to meet you, too,” my polite daughter replies.
“So… uh… what’s your favorite movie?”
Fear and threats of violence give way to relief as I listen to Peyton rehash the plots of the Descendants movies for Rhett. When he catches my eye, I give him the tiniest head shake no .
I’ll tell her the truth, eventually. I will. But not right now. First, Rhett has to earn it.
Beside me, Margarita winces and leans forward, letting out a slow breath as Mattie clings to her pant leg. It doesn’t take me long to recognize what’s going on.
“You’re in labor.”
“For the past two hours.” Her expression is, dare I say, conspiratorial?
“I’ll bet you’re ready for this. Come here, Mattie.” I whisk him up on my hip. “You’re like ten days overdue, aren’t you?”
She gives me a dark look. “I’m due the fourteenth. But, yes, I’m ready. Do you not see the size of me?”
My brow furrows. “I was sure Jason told me you were due December first.”
“No.” Her beautiful dark eyes confess the rest of what she’s unwilling to admit as she breathes through the pain. The math problem works itself out in my head.
“It’s not Jason’s.” I say it matter-of-factly, my insides untangling as the words come out. “But you let him think it was.”
Margarita’s beautiful face twitches with annoyance, as if there’s nothing more reprehensible than being forced to explain herself to me. “Jason’s a great dad,” she huffs. “I wanted to believe it was his, that it was meant to be… a second chance for us. Sometimes we lie to ourselves… until we can’t anymore.” She straightens up and blows out a long breath as the contraction tapers off. “I didn’t want to have to do this alone. It was so hard with Mattie, and my family was not supportive the first time. I dreaded having to go through all of that again. I…” She pauses, as if realizing she’s telling me too much. “After my announcement on the boat, I didn’t expect Rhett to stick around, but he did.” She looks away, her voice going wistful as she whispers, almost to herself, “He stuck around.”
I follow her gaze to Rhett, who, hands in pockets, is rocking on his heels and nodding in response to Peyton’s animated chatter.
From zero to two daughters in one day. Wow. I almost feel sorry for the guy.
I almost feel brave, too. Brave enough to confront Margarita, and not just because she’s got an obvious handicap and couldn’t possibly beat me in a footrace. I lean in, looking around to make sure no one else hears us, not even Jason. “Why did you leak those photos from the nanny cam? You hurt Jason more than you hurt me, you know.”
“What are you talking about? That was you.”
“It wasn’t me! Why doesn’t anyone believe me?”
Even with a seven-to-ten-pound brand-new person slowly making its way out of her, Margarita’s face is a serene mountain pool with one tiny ripple on it. “We have a lot of history, Jason and I, but I would never do something so awful to him. Yes, I was angry with you, with both of you. I read your book, and I was convinced you were using him. On the one hand, I wanted him to get hurt. It felt like poetic justice. But on the other, he’s the only person who’s been there for me these past three years, even if it was… dysfunctional.” Her gaze shifts from me to Mattie, who is painting his face with the end of my braid. I expect her to snatch her precious son out of my boyfriend-stealing arms, but instead, her expression softens. “Maybe Jason is right. Maybe we both deserve to finally be happy.” She leans forward again, lips pursed in a long intake of breath.
At the mention of his name, Jason clues in and heads our way. “Oh my God! Is it time? Is this happening? I’ll go get the car.”
“No.” Margarita holds out a hand in the universal sign for just give me a minute, I’m finishing up a contraction . When it’s done, she straightens. “Can you and Emmy keep Mattie while I’m in the hospital?”
Jason cocks his head. “Aren’t I going with you?”
“No.” Her eyes lock on his, and if I didn’t know better, I’d have said they were apologetic. Then she smiles at me, and it’s the first real smile she’s ever given me. Even after everything, it makes me feel all warm inside, like I’m part of a secret club with only a handful of members who probably hate me.
“Wh-what’s happening?” Jason is flashing meme faces at warp speed.
“Come on, Jason.” I hook his elbow in mine. “Let’s get Peyton and give Margarita a minute alone with Rhett.”