CHAPTER 23
River
Ken: What’s the flavor of the day today?
River stared down at her phone and smiled.
She hadn’t seen Kennedy since Sunday. It was Wednesday now.
Every day since, though, Kennedy had sent her a text asking about the flavor of the day, which wasn’t something River actually did or sold.
River was the kind of person who always wanted to have the bestsellers on the floor, but other than that, she made whatever she wanted to make that day, and that could be testing a new flavor or making three different ones.
River Ervin: Nothing new today. I ran out of something yesterday, so I’m making that now, and I’ll start on the cherry chocolate fudge in a bit.
She hit send before she could think too much about it and got back to work.
When Michaela got there to open the shop, River took a break to focus on payroll, which was her least favorite part of running a business, and then checked her phone for a reply when she finished.
Kennedy had sent her the flavor-of-the-day text three times in total, and she’d replied to each one, but Kennedy hadn’t messaged back after her reply on Monday or Tuesday.
River didn’t get it. If Kennedy was starting a conversation, why not continue it?
Hell, maybe she really did just want to know what River was making because she was planning on stopping by and buying something.
River wished and didn’t wish for that at the same time.
Since coming back from the weirdest double date weekend, she and Lacey had been in this really awkward spot where they needed to talk, they both knew that, but neither of them was brave enough to bring anything up.
They’d agreed to see each other this Friday, but River felt like she had a dentist appointment coming up more than she had a date night with her girlfriend, which wasn’t fair to Lacey at all.
“Hey, why does your face look like that?” Calista asked when she walked in. “Also, I brought lunch.” She held up a bag. “Salads.”
“Why did you bring salads?”
“Because Ashton and I are trying to be as healthy as possible. We might be bringing a little person into the world, so we want to be around a long time for them, and we were eating like crap. Also, my wife is making me.” Calista set the bag on the desk.
“You eat like crap, too, so just have the damn salad. There’s at least chicken on it.
It’s grilled, but dip it in the dressing I got you on the side, and you’ll be fine. Back to you. Why do you look sad?”
“I don’t look sad.”
“Yes, you do,” Calista argued as she pulled a salad container out of the bag and set it on the desk before she walked over to one of the refrigerators to pull out a bottle of water. “What happened? You said the weekend was fine. We haven’t really talked much since, but was it not fine?”
“No, it…” River paused. “God, how do I even describe it?”
“I don’t know, but now I’m really curious. I have about a hundred questions. Like, were they just as hot as they are on screen? Were they nice, or total assholes?”
“They were fine.”
“Yeah, there’s that word again.” Calista squinted at her and sat down on the desk next to her. “What happened? Did you and Lacey not reconnect?”
“Does a shower where we didn’t actually touch each other count?”
“No. And how do you even do that? Was it some kind of locker room shower with a dozen showerheads or something?”
“No, it was a regular shower, and we clumsily danced around each other in there.”
“River, you were in what was probably a mansion with your girlfriend for the weekend, and you two didn’t have sex? Ashton and I would have gotten naked in every room in that place.”
“You’re forgetting that we weren’t alone,” River replied. “And since there were cameras, too, if we’d done that, pretty sure they’d just call it porn.”
“What is going on with you two?”
“We need to break up,” she said.
“Need to?”
“It’s just not there anymore. I know that now, so if the weekend did anything for me, it’s that.”
“I’m sorry, River. What happened?”
“Kennedy Gannon.”
“What about Kennedy Gannon? Was she a bitch? I’ve heard she can be a little uptight. Plus, I read up on her while you were gone. Apparently, she almost hit Cameron in some fight. I almost texted you to be careful, but I didn’t want–”
“She did not. That whole thing blew up because people wanted to get paid for their bullshit,” she interjected. “They fought, yeah, but Cameron didn’t throw a glass at her, and Kennedy definitely didn’t almost hit her.”
“I guess you would know.”
“I like her.”
“Who?”
“Kennedy.”
“So, she was nice? That’s good.”
“No, you’re kind of missing the point here, Cal. I like her. I really, really like her.”
Calista shook her head and offered River wide eyes.
“I’m sorry; are you saying you like Kennedy Gannon as something more than one of the famous women you spent time with this weekend?”
River nodded and replied, “I can’t explain it, but she’s great. I spent most of the weekend with her.”
“You didn’t–”
“What? No. Nothing happened. I would never do that to Lace. Besides, Kennedy is with Cameron.”
“Yeah, and they’ve been together for five years. They’re basically married, River.”
River wasn’t about to break Kennedy’s confidence only a few days after promising to keep it, so she couldn’t correct her best friend on that.
She also didn’t know for a fact what would happen with that crumbling relationship in the future.
Maybe Kennedy and Cameron would stay together anyway and get married one day, and she would just be one of many women who had a massive crush on Kennedy Gannon.
“Nothing happened. Nothing like that, anyway. Lacey kind of connected with Cameron, and I connected with Kennedy, so we hung out with them more than each other.”
“River… You had one job.”
“I know. But Lacey was having fun with Cameron, too. It worked out, I guess, is the best way to say it.”
“But you have more than friendly feelings for a woman you’re not dating, River.”
“Which is why Lace and I need to talk.”
“I’d say so. You know nothing can happen with you and Kennedy, though, right?”
“Yes. She’s with someone.”
“Not just because of that. I mean, she’s Kennedy freaking Gannon. She’s a movie star.”
“Yeah. So?”
River crossed her arms over her chest.
“You barely leave this place,” Calista noted. “She lives in LA, I’m assuming. It’s not a long flight or something, but it’s a long-ass drive in traffic. Let’s pretend she dumps Cameron, runs through the front door, and declares her undying love for you. Are you going to move up there?”
“What? No.”
“And is she going to move down here?”
“You’re being ridiculous,” River stated.
“I know it’s not going to happen, okay? I’m not delusional; I get it.
I only told you because that was part of what made me really understand that I needed to end things with Lacey.
That whole car ride back was just awkward.
When I got here, we were really busy, so you and I couldn’t talk before you had to go, but I’ve been here every night since.
She hasn’t offered to stay over. I have not offered to stay over there.
We’re supposed to go out on Friday night, but I don’t want to go out with her. ”
“Why are you delaying the inevitable, then?”
“Because I love Lacey.”
“Apparently not, River.”
“No, that’s part of what I’ve figured out this weekend.” She stood up and ran a hand through her hair. “I do love her. I’m not in love with her anymore, and that’s the difference. I’ve been putting this off, and I think she has, too, because I don’t want to lose her from my life.”
“You want to be friends?”
“I don’t know if she wants that, but I do.
I feel like it’s there. We’ve basically not touched each other for a long time anyway, and it was weird this weekend at first, but once I figured out how I really felt and knew we’d be ending soon, I didn’t want her to see me naked anymore.
I wrapped a towel around myself just to take a shower.
We’d just been in that shower together, but I felt like it would be wrong for her to see me naked now. ”
“That’s a pretty fast transition there, River. Are you sure about this?”
“I’m sure I don’t want to go out on a date with her on Friday. I don’t want the pressure to kiss her at night when I don’t really want that. Lacey is gorgeous; it’s not her. I used to never want to stop kissing her. But now, I feel like I’d be kissing my best friend.”
“Hey, that’s me.”
“You’re basically my sister, and you know that. And no, I don’t want to kiss you, like, ever. Gross. No offense.”
“None taken. I only ever want to kiss my wife.”
“So, I was thinking this morning. If Lacey asked me to just hang out and do whatever, would I want to do that? The answer was yes, I’d do that. We watch a movie together, hang out, and I leave after? Hell, yeah. Sign me up.”
“Then, you need to tell her.”
“I’m going to. She has dinner with her parents tonight and a client tomorrow night, so I won’t see her until Friday.
She’s actually doing a couple’s massage with Kennedy and Cameron that day before our date.
She’s driving up to their place, I think, so I don’t even know if the date will happen.
It’s going to be a hellish drive for her to get back.
She might not want to go out after that. ”
“River, you need to talk to her.”
“I know. But I’m not doing this over the phone, Cal. I need to do it in person. So, if we see each other Friday night, we’ll talk then. If not, I’ll talk to her on Saturday. I don’t want to lose her, but I can’t stay with her like this, either.”
“I get it. I wish this weren’t happening because I really liked the two of you together, but if you aren’t in love with her, telling her sooner rather than later is the right thing to do, even though you can’t have Kennedy Gannon, River.”
River wanted to tell Calista that Kennedy wasn’t in love with Cameron anymore, either, and that she could tell Kennedy was at least a little into her.
Kennedy had been texting her this week, too, which had to mean something.
Right? She wanted to tell her best friend that there had been something about Kennedy from the moment she had first seen her that had her not only attracted to her, because Kennedy Gannon was beautiful, but also totally drawn in and intrigued by her.
Then, River had started to get to know her, and she’d really liked her.
She wanted to tell Calista that she hadn’t wanted to sleep at all because she’d wanted to stay up and talk to Kennedy all night, and when they’d had to go to bed because neither of them could keep their eyes open after their long talk on the beach that night, that she’d wanted to go into the same room with Kennedy and that the thought of Kennedy sleeping next to someone else had made her heart ache because it had felt wrong.
“I’m well aware, thank you,” she said instead. “Now, let’s eat these horrible salads.”
“Yes. And don’t tell my wife, but I’m grabbing a piece of fudge before I go.”
River laughed, and they ate while they talked about the business until Michaela came into the back and told River that they had a line.
She helped get the line down, restocked the front after Calista had left, and then returned to the back office to do some inventory and make sure she had enough of everything after completing that big order.
It was only then that she noticed her phone light up with a notification.
Expecting it to be Lacey, maybe canceling for Friday, she picked it up and noticed Kennedy’s nickname. She clicked into the message.
Ken: I like cherries.
River laughed. She wasn’t sure what she’d been expecting, but it hadn’t been that.
River Ervin: Should I save you a piece?
She typed her reply and thought about it before sending it because it had a clear intention behind it.
If she was saving something for Kennedy, that meant she would have to then give it to her, which would mean seeing each other again, and they hadn’t talked about that.
River also wasn’t sure that she should proceed with that because, even if she broke up with Lacey today, Kennedy was still with Cameron, and River had already been so close to holding Kennedy’s hand and kissing her on that beach; she couldn’t risk it.
She couldn’t just not send that message, though, so she did before she sat down in her chair and waited.
Kennedy’s response came in only a moment later.
Ken: Maybe. How long does fudge last, exactly?
River Ervin: Are you still eating the one we made this weekend?
Ken: I finished it yesterday, but come on, River; make it sound like I took ten pounds of fudge home. I only had two pieces left. You ate some. Cam had a piece. Lacey did, too. Plus, Jessie and the camera crew.
River Ervin: Well, how did it taste when you had the last piece yesterday?
Ken: Fine. I had it all wrapped up, though.
River Ervin: So, if I save you a piece of the cherry chocolate, which has pieces of real cherries in it and is perfectly balanced, if I do say so myself, you could come by pretty much whenever and pick it up. It would still taste good. I can also freeze it if you can’t get by soon enough.
Ken: Can I let you know?
River swallowed at that because Kennedy might actually be stopping by to pick up a piece of fudge.
“No, you idiot. She’s not coming here for fudge that she could get anywhere. She’d be coming to see you. Fuck, River. Be careful,” she said to herself before she typed back.
River Ervin: Of course. I’m here all the time anyway. If you can’t make it soon, I can freeze it for you, or I can make a new batch whenever.
Ken: Hey, I made a new playlist. Want to check it out while you do whatever it is that you’re doing over there?
River Ervin: Boring inventory. And yes.
Then, a link appeared, followed by a message.
Ken: Let me know what you think.
And that was an opening. For the first time, there was an opening for them to see each other again and to continue to talk, and as much as River knew she shouldn’t take it, she couldn’t help it.
River Ervin: Can I text you later, when I’m done, so that I can focus?
Ken: Of course. Until then.
“Until then,” River muttered under her breath.