Chapter 5 #3
I had my own businesses, my own money, and my own name tied to shit I built from the ground up, so watchin’ them sit back and let everything revolve around their men the way they did, it felt different to me.
It just seemed like their entire personalities folded into their men, and they just fell in line with it without question.
Again, I didn’t think it was a bad thing, but it was so different from what I was used to that I couldn’t ignore it.
I took a sip of my drink and leaned back in my chair a little, remindin’ myself that I was still gettin’ to know them, and just because I didn’t understand it yet didn’t mean it was somethin’ to judge.
So, I let it be what it was and stayed where I was, sittin’ here watchin’, and learnin’ how they moved without sayin’ too much.
I leaned into Renza a little more, lettin’ my guard drop just enough, and focused on the moment instead of everything else. And for now, that was enough.
We had been sittin’ at the table for hours, drinkin’, smokin’, and just choppin’ it up. I had already eaten enough food to know I was gon’ be full for the rest of the night, but plates kept comin’ out, drinks kept gettin’ poured, and nobody around the table seemed ready to call it a night.
The patio had turned into one of them nights where everything blended together after a while.
The music stayed low in the background, the lights above us kept that warm glow over the table, and everybody was leaned back in their seats, comfortable enough to talk shit without nobody havin’ to force the conversation.
I wasn’t sayin’ much, but I was present.
I was listenin’, watchin’, and tryin’ to let myself relax instead of sittin’ here searchin’ for a reason to feel out of place.
Renza fit right in with them, and I could tell this was really his world.
He didn’t have to try or have to make room for his personality because it was already understood here.
Him and Pressure had been goin’ back and forth for the longest over some dumb shit that somehow turned into them arguin’ over who had better taste in whatever they shared interest in, and Kay’Lo sat there quiet for the most part, sippin’ his drink and throwin’ in one slick line every now and then that had everybody laughin’.
Kay’Lo was different to me. He didn’t talk as much as Pressure or Renza, but when he did say somethin’, everybody heard him. His eyes was the first thing I noticed about him, and not because they were pretty in that regular way women be talkin’ about.
They were intense, sharp, and too calm sometimes. I had green eyes myself, so I wasn’t the type to be impressed just because somebody’s eyes had color in them, but his had a weight to them that made me understand real quick why people probably watched how they moved around him.
He glanced over at me once while Renza and Pressure was talkin’ shit, and it wasn’t nothin’ rude about it. He just looked, nodded a little, then went right back to his drink. Still, I peeped how heavy that look felt.
Pressure was louder with his presence. He sat there with Pluto tucked into him, with one arm around her while he kept his cup in his other hand.
Pluto stayed leaned into him with her hand restin’ near his chest every now and then while her pregnant stomach showed through that fitted outfit she had on.
He would talk crazy one second, then look down at her the next with this soft attention that made it clear she was the one person at that table he wasn’t playin’ about.
Renza had his arm behind my chair, and every now and then his fingers brushed against my shoulder or the back of my neck.
Then, Pluto’s phone started ringin’.
She looked down at it, and her face softened before she answered. “Hey, Zurie.”
Pressure looked down at her right away, probably because he heard the name, but he didn’t say nothin’ at first.
Pluto listened for a few seconds, and then her brows pulled together. “Zurie, why do you always do this? You wait until the very last minute to tell me you have a school project.”
Her voice was still gentle, but it had that tired mama tone under it. I didn’t know the whole situation, and it wasn’t my business to know, but I could tell from the way everybody reacted that Zurie wasn’t just some random little girl callin’ her.
Pluto rubbed her forehead. “Baby, all the stores are closed now. You can’t keep waitin’ until bedtime to tell me you need a whole list of supplies.”
Pressure sat forward a little and reached for her stomach, rubbin’ it slow while he looked at her. “Calm down, baby.”
“I am calm,” Pluto said, even though she clearly wasn’t.
Pressure held his hand out. “Let me talk to her.”
Pluto hesitated for half a second, then handed him the phone.
Pressure brought it to his ear, his whole voice changin’ when he spoke. “Baby girl, what you need?”
He listened, noddin’ as if Zurie could see him, and the way his hand stayed on Pluto’s stomach while he talked made me look between them for a second.
“A’ight,” he said. “Poster board, glue sticks, markers, what else?”
He paused, listenin’ again, then looked over toward the house before lookin’ back down at Pluto. “I got it. I’mma have the stuff picked up, but next time you got a project, you gotta let us know sooner, Z.”
There was another pause, and he nodded.
“I understand that,” he said, still calm. “But that ain’t good enough, baby. Let us know in advance next time, a’ight?”
He listened again, and a smile spread across his face. “I love you too. I’ll be up in a minute to help you.”
When he hung up, he handed Pluto the phone back, and she took it with a look already sittin’ on her face.
“You too easy on her,” she said, rollin’ her eyes.
Pressure leaned back, not bothered at all. “It’s just a school project, baby.”
“That is not the point.”
“I wish them people would fail her ’cause she ain’t got a poster board,” he said, takin’ a sip from his cup. “They better grade the idea and mind they fuckin’ business.”
Pluto looked at him with an attitude. “You missin’ the whole point.”
Pressure leaned in and kissed her before she could say anything else. “Okay, baby. You right. I’m wrong.”
Renza laughed from beside me. “That’s right, Pluto. Keep that nigga all the way in check.”
Pressure looked over his cup at Renza. “You the last nigga that need to be talkin’ about somebody keepin’ somebody in check.”
Then his eyes flicked to me for a second before goin’ back to Renza.
Kay’Lo started laughin’ low, shakin’ his head as he looked down into his cup. Renza smirked and leaned back, but I sat there with my face calm, tryna figure out exactly how to take that.
It wasn’t nothin’ major, and nobody said my name, but I still felt it. It gave inside joke, and I was sittin’ right here without knowin’ what the joke was. I didn’t like feelin’ left out of conversations when I was already the one tryin’ to fit into a space I didn’t fully understand yet.
I picked up my drink and took a sip, keepin’ my face the same because I wasn’t about to give nobody the satisfaction of thinkin’ they had me uncomfortable.
The conversation moved on after that, or at least it seemed to.
Pressure and Renza started goin’ back and forth again like nothin’ had just passed, their voices mixin’ in with the music while Kay’Lo sat back in his chair, watchin’ them with that same calm look in his eyes before cuttin’ in here and there when he felt like it.
Toni leaned into him again, her hand restin’ on his leg while he rubbed along her thigh without even lookin’ down, like that was just second nature for him.
Pluto had settled back into her seat too, but not for long. I watched her glance down at her phone again, her lips curlin’ into a smile before her fingers started movin’ across the screen. I didn’t think nothin’ of it at first, not until a second later when Renza’s phone lit up on the table.
He picked his phone up, glanced down at it, and a laugh slipped out before he could even stop it, his head droppin’ a little while he shook it like whatever he just saw caught him off guard.
Pluto didn’t say nothin’ at first, but the way her lips pulled into a smile told me she already knew what he was lookin’ at without even havin’ to ask.
Renza tapped his screen a couple times, still smilin’ to himself, and whatever it was must’ve kept goin’, because he leaned back in his chair a little, starin’ at whatever she sent.
Pluto glanced down at her own phone again, then back up at him, and that quiet little exchange between them felt too easy.
I stayed still, my fingers wrapped around my cup while I watched it without sayin’ nothin’, tellin’ myself it wasn’t nothin’, even though I could feel how natural this moment between them was.
Pressure didn’t even react to it. He just sat there with his arm around Pluto, his attention movin’ between the conversation and his drink like nothin’ about that exchange stood out to him.
And that’s what made me pay closer attention, because from where I was sittin’, it stood out more than I wanted it to.
It wasn’t nothin’ loud or obvious, and it wasn’t the type of shit somebody could easily call out, but it was there in a way that felt a little too weird for me to ignore.
The way she sent him a text instead of just telling him outloud, the way he picked up his phone without even questionin’ it, and how quick they both slipped into they own little moment like the rest of us wasn’t sittin’ right at the table… I don’t know…
I lowered my eyes to my cup for a second, tellin’ myself to chill out.
I lifted my head again, lettin’ my eyes move from Pluto to Pressure.
He was still touchin’ her, still close to her and lookin’ at her, and I didn’t see nothin’ in his face that said he felt a way about what I was seein’.