Chapter 32
EMMA
For the first time ever, Cam has decided to host Thanksgiving here instead of at the house.
I think it’s because this place means more to him than anywhere else.
It’s also easier than trying to fit all of us into the dining room at home, since there are now a few more additions than there were years ago.
Either way, it’s different, and change always makes me nervous.
Though I think Thanksgiving at the house would have been way more gut wrenching without Mom.
Before I can reach for the door handle, Alex grabs my hand in his, fingers warm and steady around mine. “Hey.”
I glance at him, stomach flipping at the way his hazel eyes soften simply by looking at me.
“It’s gonna be okay,” he murmurs.
I huff out a breath. “You say that now, but there’s a good chance Cam will throttle you with a turkey leg before the night is over.”
“I can take him.” A mischievous grin pulls at his mouth.
I snort out a laugh. “I’d love to see you try.”
“Baby,” he says, cocking his head, “I own him at darts and I’m twice his size. The man is weak.”
I roll my eyes, but my lips curl up anyway. He squeezes my hand once before letting go and that simple gesture quiets down the nerves a bit, knowing that he’s by my side.
We step inside, and the warmth of the restaurant immediately wraps around me. The smell of roasted turkey, buttery mashed potatoes, and fresh bread fills the air, mixing with the faint scent of cinnamon from the candles flickering in glass holders on every table.
There is even Spanish music playing on the speaker above and I am reminded of waking up every weekend to Mom cleaning while songs just like this blasted on full volume throughout the house.
It’s a habit I feel like we all inherited from her, something comforting about having those songs playing in moments we need them the most.
The usual arrangement has been altered. Several tables have been pushed together to form one long, family-style table running down the center of the dining room, lined with mismatched chairs.
Plates are already set, silverware gleaming under the glow of the pendant lights hanging above.
There is even a hanging garland with the words “Happy Birthday Em & Frankie” and another on the opposite wall saying “Happy Thanksgiving”.
Cam went all out with making this place feel special today, either for Frankie and I, or just the holiday, I don’t know, but it’s still nice.
Near the bartop, Leo is holding Mia on his hip.
Her little fist curls around his shirt as she babbles to herself.
Frankie leans against the counter, nursing a beer, expression serious as he looks over at us, probably waiting to see how close Alex and I are standing before he decides how much of a problem it is.
Noticing us first, Leo turns in our direction. “Hey, there’s the birthday girl.”
Mia lets out an excited squeal, her chubby hands, clapping together. “Mimi!”
I smile as we walk toward them. “Hey, monkey.” I call out, pressing a kiss to her forehead as soon as I reach her.
Leo gives me a squeeze around the shoulders. “You look good, Em.”
I nudge him. “You have to say that. It’s my birthday.”
Frankie lifts his beer. “I don’t.”
I roll my eyes. “And yet, you still haven’t said anything mean. That’s how I know you’ve missed me.”
“Don’t get a big head about it,” he scowls. “Happy birthday, sis.”
“You, too, Frankie.” I say, giving him a quick hug.
Alex claps a hand on Frankie’s shoulder. “She’s right though, birthday boy. You have softened.”
Frankie shrugs Alex off like he’s contagious. “Shut up, Alex.”
Suddenly, Cam appears from the doors leading to the kitchen, wiping his hands on a dish towel. He stops short when he sees us, gaze flickering to Alex’s hand resting on my hip.
I brace myself for the explosion, but he peels his eyes away from the hand, up at me instead. “Hey, Em. Happy birthday.”
It’s not as warm and inviting as I hoped, but not hostile either.
I step closer to him. “Thanks. The restaurant looks beautiful.”
He nods. “Glad you finally get to see it.”
I smile, and for now, it’s enough.
Frankie straightens. “Is Liv coming?”
I nod. “Yep. Should be here any minute.”
He groans. “Why would you invite her?”
I deadpan. “Because she’s my best friend and today isn’t only about you, remember? You’re gonna have to get over it.”
“Not likely. She’s insufferable.” He mutters under his breath.
I ignore him as Cam steps closer toward me, hand resting on my arm for a second. “Can we talk real quick?”
I nod, following him toward the back of the restaurant, away from the others. The second we’re alone, I know what’s coming. “I know you’re worried,” I start, crossing my arms. “And I get it. But I need you to trust me.”
Cam exhales sharply. “It’s not that simple, Em. You haven’t been back that long. That’s not enough time to really know someone.”
I shake my head. “I do know him, though. I’ve known him my whole life. Yeah, he was a pain in my ass when we were kids, but Cam, he’s been there for me through the worst moments of my life. Even when you didn’t know it.”
Cam’s jaw tightens. “I don’t want you to get hurt.
Especially not now.” He looks down at my ICD poking out from underneath the sweater, a constant reminder of my heart condition and the device that I can’t even trust to save me now.
I adjust the sweater to cover it back up, feeling suddenly self-conscious about it.
Stepping closer, I lower my voice a notch. “I know. And I love you for trying to protect me, but I’m old enough to make my own choices. And I’m choosing him.”
It’s the first time I’ve admitted feelings or even talked about any relationship with him, and I feel vulnerable. But I know I need to say it so that he will understand.
He seems to ponder on my words for a bit before finally pulling me into a hug. “You’re my little sister. My only sister. I’m always gonna want to protect you.”
I squeeze him back. “I know.”
When we return to the dining room, the door swings open as Liv and Sophia step inside, both holding dessert boxes.
Liv spots Frankie and gives him her biggest smile possible. “Aw, look at that. You missed me.”
Frankie scowls. “You’re in my way.”
Liv grins, stepping directly in front of him. “How about now?”
He grits his teeth. “I hate you.”
Liv pats his cheek. “Happy Thanksgiving Birthday, bestie.” He storms past her, not giving her the time of day anymore.
Sophia rolls her eyes, setting the desserts on the bartop next to other food and drinks splayed out. “I regret getting in the car with her.”
We all laugh, except Frankie. He makes his way to the table and sits down preemptively.
Liv runs over to me squealing. “Happy birthday, pretty girl.”
Sophia is behind her with a huge grin, her pearly whites on full display. “Happy birthday, Em!”
They both pile on top of me for a hug. “Thank you, thank you.”
Soon, we’re settling in at the long table, plates full, voice overlapping in conversation and laughter.
I stare out at everyone and take it all in. All the people I love, together, in the same room for the first time in years.
A pang of sadness tugs at my chest because my mom should be here, and because this might be my last birthday and holiday with all of them if I don’t get a donor soon.
I try to push the thought away.
I don’t want to think about endings, at least not tonight.
A warm hand slides over my thigh, as if noticing the build up of thoughts racing in my head. Alex leans in, his breath warm against my ear. “If I could,” he whispers, “I’d eat you on this table.”
My eyes widen, a laugh bubbling up before I can stop it. I turn my head into him, narrowing my eyes. “Behave.”
“No promises,” he winks as he teases back.
The sadness momentarily fades, and I try to enjoy the night and be in the moment, cataloging every detail just in case it all disappears.