Chapter 24 Chaos
“It’s my birthday, and every ho up in dis bitch ’bout to get a mouthful of nut tonight!” Blue shouts at the top of his lungs.
I tilt my bottle to my lips and look around the bar. Everyone’s having a good time tonight, but I miss Charisma. After all we went through last night, I decided to give Charisma and me some space today.
After my shower, I told her how her li’l boyfriend was linked to my disappearance. It scared her, but I told her that she didn’t have shit to worry about under my protection.
Delite and Spank walk up to my table, and Delite plops in my lap. “What’s up, daddy?” she asks.
“Nothing, li’l mama.” I wrap my arm around her waist.
“He’s married these days,” Spanks states.
“Not quite,” I reply.
I see someone in the mirror over the bar walking in. Everything about that nigga looks out of place in here with his expensive ass three-piece suit, Italian loafers, three-hundred-dollar haircut, facial, and manicure.
What the hell did Charisma ever see in that nigga? Couldn’t protect her to save his life or hers if he had to.
I drink my beer as that bitch-made nigga scans the bar.
“You’re tense, Chaos. What’s up?” Delite asks.
“You see that nigga that’s approaching us from behind? When he approaches us, Spank, give him some attention. Delite, record whatever the fuck Spank is about to do.”
“Okay,” Delite replies as Senator Benjamin Starling stops in front of us.
I glance at the table across from us where Champagne and Wildflower are entertaining one of the brothers. I give him a nod, he whispers to them, and they jump up and flank the senator, draping themselves all over him.
“I’m not surprised to find you here. You’ve got a beautiful woman on your hands, and you’re hanging with a bunch of whores,” he states as Spank lowers to her knees.
He tries to push Champagne and Wildflower away, but they’re charming and persuasive, and he resorts to ignoring them instead.
Spank bats her eyes. “Why don’t you let me take some of the stress off, Senator? It won’t cost a thing.”
“Get away from me,” he demands, but she doesn’t move. Champagne and Wildflower rub on him, playing their part well.
“Why the fuck you up in my space?” I ask, turning my beer up.
“I wanted to see if the rumors that you were back were true.”
“Ya mama could’ve answered that.”
He clenches his fists at his sides.
“Nigga, you might wanna chill with all that energy,” I remark calmly.
“What? Are you going to have your thug friends pull their guns on me?”
“Nah. It would be more fun beating ya ass myself.”
“Charisma’s too good for you. You need to let her go because I will find her.”
“Don’t worry about her. Worry ’bout what you’re doing, nigga,” I reply, jerking my head down at where Spank is kneeling in front of him.
She’s blocking the camera’s direct view. Her head moves back and forth as though she’s sucking him off, and Wildflower reaches down and rubs Spank’s head as though she is encouraging her.
That nigga doesn’t realize that she’s pulled his zipper down.
“I’m prepared to release a statement about our relationship, her disappearance, and re-open the investigation into my wife’s murder. Guess who the starring attraction in that story will be?” he asks.
Spank frees his dick from his pants, and he grabs her head, trying to push her away. The girls are giggling, Delite is recording, and the good old senator is struggling to get his dick back.
“You know, I can see why you agreed to wait a while before having sex with Charisma. I’d be ashamed if my shit was that little too,” I tease.
“I won’t stop until I find her. She’s mine. When I’m done with you, you’ll never see what the outside looks like again. While your sorry ass is buried underneath the jail, I’ll be raising your kid, and he’ll be calling me daddy.”
Everything goes black as I jump up from the bench seat, pushing the women aside, and I shove my gun hard underneath his chin. Benjamin falls backward onto the table behind him, and Knuckles jumps up from the table and out of the way.
I choke the shit out of this nigga with my free hand, as I continue to shove the gun underneath his chin with the other.
“He’ll pay for his sins, and you’ll have the privilege of knowing that. Today isn’t the day that you send him to meet his maker though.” Priest’s voice is calm behind me, but as deadly as the steel in my hand.
“Today is that day,” I argue.
“Let that boy go, Chaos,” Priest warns tightly.
I allow Priest to take my gun from my hand, but the moment he does, I bust the senator in the mouth. Blow after blow, I rain on his head and face as I beat the shit out of him.
“That’s enough!” Priest barks.
I step back with my chest heaving as the senator rolls onto his side and coughs, spitting up blood. His face is fucked up, unrecognizable, and bloody.
“There’s gonna be hell to pay for this one,” Dongle, an older member of the MC, remarks.
“We’ll have to fix this shit fast.” Charmz agrees.
I look at Delite and wiggle my fingers, and she hands me her phone. It’s already on her photograph app set at the video that she recorded. I kneel beside the senator.
“Nigga, the minute you open your mouth about me, you’ll have to explain why the hell you were in our bar and what the hell this is all about.”
I hit play. Delite has used some sort of editing software that makes his hand appear to be holding onto Spank’s head, pulling her closer rather than pushing her away.
It remains there for several seconds, and loud grunts comes through the speakers.
It sounds like he’s enjoying it, and somehow, she has eliminated all background noise except for his grunts.
The senator lifts his eyes to me. “This isn’t over. I’ll get you.”
“I can’t wait, but your ass is gonna die for that disrespectful shit you said to me. It might not be me who pulls the trigger, but ya bitch ass is gon’ die, and it will be indirectly by my hands,” I promise.
“Get his ass out of here,” Priest orders two prospects who snatch him up from the floor.
“Where are you going?” Priest asks as I saunter toward the door.
“I’m about to bounce,” I reply snippily.
“Chill for a minute. Where are we on the investigation, Digger?” he asks.
“We found the campaign manager, the chief of staff, and his mistress.”
“Is everything in play the way that I set it up?” Priest asks.
Digger nods and looks at me. “Yeah. It’ll be released tonight at midnight.”
Priest turns to me. “Don’t do anything stupid, because you’ve got too much at stake. We’re too close to bringing this baby home for you to fuck up now. It’s your job to secure a future and good legacy for your son. Do what your father could not do.”
“A’ight. Can I leave now?” I ask angrily.
“Yeah. Rage, Ox, Knuckles, Crypt, and Chainz, I need you to ride out with Chaos. That nigga knew too much about Chaos’s link to Charisma. Make sure Chaos is not followed, watched, or assaulted.”
“Let’s roll,” Rage orders.
We all head out together, with Rage taking the lead, Ox riding beside me, Chainz and Knuckles behind me, and Crypt pulling up the rear.
“What’s wrong?” Charisma asks as I step into the apartment.
I tell her everything that happened, and I hate the spooked look on her face.
“Don’t be looking fucking scared. You know I got you.”
“Why do you even care, Chaos?”
“Because.”
“Because isn’t an answer.”
I find it hard to confess my feelings about her. Why can’t she just accept what I’m saying?
I lock my keys away and remove my boots. “It’ll have to be an answer tonight.”
“When you finally mature enough to let go of the past, acknowledge your true feelings about everything, and forgive yourself, then you might find healing. Until then, you won’t be any good for anyone, including our son.”
Her words anger me, but they sink in. I watch as she walks away, but I blow out a breath and jump up, running after her.
“I’m good for our son. Don’t you ever doubt or question that, you feel me?”
“No, you’re not. Look at you, you’re broken. You’re no good for him, and you’re only gonna hurt him the way your daddy hurt you.”
Her words sting, but I know that she is telling the truth.
“So, maybe you’re right, but don’t you think you’ve been hurting him all along? You’re just like me, locked in the past, in a world of hurt and pain your mother caused you and that I compounded when I walked out without an explanation.”
She walks away from me and runs up the stairs with me right behind her. “You don’t know what you’re talking about,” she argues when we reach the bedroom.
“Yes, I do. Your pain might be different than mine, but it’s no less impactful.
Someone you trusted and who you were close to broke you, and the same with me.
You’re hurting our son because you carry around unresolved hurt.
You shut yourself off because you’re afraid that no man can love you, the way your mother said.
“You’re afraid that all you have to offer a man is your body, and you are so much more.
Until you realize that, and that sex doesn’t mean that you’re just doing it because you have nothing else to offer, you will never be healed.
You cannot give any man a complete family, because you’re too busy running from the truth.
“You didn’t have sex with that man, because you were afraid that you weren’t good enough. You haven’t allowed anyone in for that same reason, and you build a wall around you and CJ to keep the world out. It’s not fair to him.”
“I built that damn wall because I knew that I would never love anyone else but his father! You’re the only one I’ve ever loved, Chaos. Why can’t you see that? You were all I ever wanted.”
Her face is all screwed up, and her balled up fists remind me of the senator’s earlier, but when the tears fall, something within me breaks. I hate being the reason that she cries or experiences any form of pain. I pick her up and sit down on the bed with her on my lap.
“Shh. It’s okay, baby. We’ll figure this shit out together. Nobody gave us a blueprint,” I whisper, rubbing her back as she sobs. I hate seeing her this broken, and I wish that I could take away all the pain.
I don’t know what else to do, so I let her cry until she gets it all out, and then I lay her on the bed. I remove her clothes and then mine before I make love to her.
“You’re so beautiful, Charisma. Inside and out, ma. You’ve got everything that little boy and this grown man need to make us whole,” I whisper, kissing her chin as I sink deep into her heat.
“Chaos,” she whimpers.
“You have everything within to heal the hurt little girl inside of you. Let yourself love her, baby. Let yourself forgive your mother and heal the little girl who was left alone.”
I dip further into her until our hips connect. The way that this moment is coming together for us breaks something inside of me. She shifts underneath me and wraps her arms around me, embracing me.
“You’re so damn loveable, Charisma.”
She cries, and I hold her, even though I continue stroking her repeatedly, until we both release all that we’ve held inside.