Chapter 21
Love
“Rian?” I ask startled, feeling relieved to see him in person. He told me they were coming back. I search for Dominik but he’s not there. Karl is here, and Dominik isn’t. “Where’s Dominik? Where’s Damian?” I ask after noticing Damian isn’t here either.
“They had to stay,” Aiden says and I go in Rian’s direction and hug him, crying, until I fall to my knees at the realisation of what “They had to stay” means. Josh said there was an uprising…
“They’re dead aren’t they? I killed them, didn’t I? They’re dead because I murdered Dylan- They-They’re dead? I killed them?-"
“No one’s dead. We have no positive news, but no negative news either. No one has contacted anyone outside that island ever since we left,” Rian informs and hugs me sitting on the floor next to me.
“They-”
“Come on, it’s Dominik and Damian they’re alive,” Josh asserts but he seems unsure.
“They have to be,” he whispers almost inaudibly.
“I need to talk to dad, I’ll be right back.
Karl will you follow me?” Josh asks knowing full well he’s out of his territory.
Karl works for the Ricik’s not our family.
“Can’t,” Karl replies with his Mitkian accent. “I am bound to keep Love under my sight at all times,” he explains and my brother nears him.
“Let me enable you access to the property's cameras. That way you can still see her, does that work?” Karl just nods and hands his phone to Josh while I sink deeper into Rian’s arms and fall to the asphalt.
Dominik is ok. He needs to be ok, I refuse to believe otherwise!
“Let’s get you home,” Rian says and I get back on my feet holding his arm as he might disappear too.
“Is there anything you know you aren’t telling me?” I ask Rian and Sammy shakes her head at him. “Sammy?”
“He was hurt, that’s why Damian stayed,” he’s hurt...
He’s hurt. He’s hurt. He’s hurt.
He’s hurt. He’s hurt. He’s hurt.
But Damian is there. He’s the best trauma surgeon here he doesn’t lose anyone. Not anyone that he can possibly save. And he wouldn’t let Dominik die. He would never do it.
“How can we help Dominik?” I ask and Rian opens the front door, I look at the white and grey room and it suddenly feels gloomy. Maya is standing on the couch and watching the news. I almost laugh. If only taxes were our only problems.
“Stay here. Be prepared. Pray. Your dad already has a surgical team waiting at the infirmary ready for two possible injured,” I’ve never been religious.
But I’d start a new religion just so I could pray for him.
Pray to a god that will answer my prayers.
So I pray. I pray to every and any god I know hoping at least one of them keeps my Dominik alive.
The shine I’ve been getting in his eyes? It can’t go away. “Rian I need to do something or I might faint!” I exclaim starting to hyperventilate.
“They’re going to be ok, they’re Dominik and Damian.-”
“You don’t know that. There was a huge riot. The place was looking like fucking hell,” Marcus says and Sammy hands me a paper bag she probably got from the kitchen. I don’t remember seeing her leave my side. But Maya isn’t on the couch anymore, she’s getting me seated on a chair.
Maya’s green eyes are as clear as Dominik’s in this light, still not as vivid green. Dominik’s eyes are emerald vivid eyes, their shine is sometimes neon-like. Makes them look like a gem. And what a gem he is.
I remember the first time I realised I liked him. It was one year after Dominik entered my life. Yes, he fell first, but I fell harder.
One year ago...
I needed this. Company. Josh gave me a new friend group. Or better a new member in our trusted circle.
Dominik has slowly crept his way into my life, into my brain, my daily routine, my house and my family.
My mother absolutely loves Dominik. “What’s going in that little head of yours, Cherry?
” see? That’s exactly what I’m talking about.
He’s trying to sneak under the barriers once fortified, more and more fragile every day that I pass in his presence.
“Nothing much, just thinking how much my life changed this year,” I say and Dominik sits down on the front porch next to me.
“For the better?” he asks and I nod, trying to look away but somehow his green eyes always entice me. Thankfully someone always appears before I do something stupid.
Like losing him because of Declan?
Shut up, conscience voice and stop making so much sense. “You’re partly the reason, you and Damian were a nice addition to our friend group”
“Well, thank you for including me, Vie. You’re the only reason my life changed,” Dominik says and gets closer to me, dangerously closer.
I make the mistake to lean towards him, I feel his deep breath on my freezing lips and it takes everything in me not to kiss him.
Thankfully I pull away and the door opens.
“Is Dominik staying for dinner?” my mother asks just as enticed, only in a different way. Dominik is the shiny gentleman of the group, secretly the real dark seed, even if Rian’s social’s name says otherwise. Dominik looks at me. His tall frame towers over me.
“Am I?” Dominik whispers in my ear, I shiver and pretend it’s because of the cold.
“Sure,” I whisper nodding.
“Seems like I am,” Dominik says and moves inside my home, into my kitchen like he owns it, like he always did. And without ever really touching me, it feels like he already owns me.
I walk inside and Dominik closes the door behind me, smiling at me, only until my brother gets downstairs. He still glances at me every now and then. And I know it because I also do.
It’s our little game. Back and forth play.
A look here, a nickname there, a basic conversation or a deep late-night text exchange.
It doesn’t go further either I don’t know if it’s because of Declan anymore, or if I’m just scared of how much Dominik has grown and rooted into my soul.
We’re tied. Like it or not he doesn’t seem like he wants to cut the knot holding us together.
And neither will I. And maybe that makes me a sadist, I shouldn’t want to keep someone waiting but I really want Dominik to wait for me.
Now…
Seems like now I’m the one who has to endure the waiting, a long and aching wait. To know if I’ll get him back or not.
“He’s going to be fine,” Maya says and only then do I notice I’m sobbing. I clean my face and shut my mouth.
“Sorry, I lost it,” I whisper and Maya replies “It’s ok”.
“Distract yourself,” Marcus says and Rian almost kills him with a glare, I feel his sharp silver eyes carve his heart fatally, but when I blink Marcus is fine, intact and still breathing only walking away.
“At least I know when I’m not wanted somewhere,” Marcus speaks almost soundlessly to us.
That was meant to cut deep into Rian’s heart and I’m not sure I like Marcus anymore.
It’s a fate he’ll have to resign he hurts Rian, he hurts me, so I hurt him. As simple as that.
“Don’t listen to him,” I whisper in Rian’s ear so Maya and Sammy won’t hear.
Marcus comment was clearly addressing Rian being mine and Dominik’s third wheel.
And it was a low blow. The lowest, shittiest one.
“You’re always welcome next to me,” I say hugging him briefly.
I want to keep holding him but the girls would be even more suspicious than they are now.
“I’ll be right back,” Rian says and goes upstairs, in Marcus’ direction.
I stay on the chair next to the couch, bouncing back and forth, staring at the wall counting every second that passes and praying every minute sharp.
The grey wall starts to look like home, even though I’ve only been here for some hours.
Sixteen hours to be exact. In which 6 of those I looked at the now familiar-looking wall.
Of course it looks familiar. It’s almost an exact replica of any other house’s inside we ever had, with some changes due to the house structure and usually my mother’s vibe when picking the house.
God, I miss her. How I wish I could hug her until everything is ok, how I wish she could whisper “It’s ok, it’s going to be ok” in my ear.
But she’s not here. Dominik isn’t here either.
My dad is probably trying to contact anyone on the island.
So I curl up and hug my knees. I hug my knees and lay my forehead on them soaking my leggings with salty water falling down my cheeks and the tip of my nose.
I look at the dark leggings until all I see is darkness, all I see is black.
“Love?” Rian screams shaking me awake. “Dominik is here,” he screams in my ears they ring but I don’t care. I fell asleep? How could I?
“Is he ok? Can I see him?-”
“He’s in surgery but Damian clamped his- doctor talk sorry, in regular human speech, he stopped the major bleeding and kept him transfusing while flying here. Damian refused to address his own wounds. I was wondering if you could convince Maya to ask him to let me check-”
“Got it,” I say in autopilot. “When can I see him?”
“He’s been in surgery for three hours so hopefully in three hours they’ll be done,” what?
“Why didn’t you wake me up?” I ask Rian and he laughs.
His pearl white smile, he rarely presents, showing.
“And give you three more hours to worry for nothing? No way,” he says and leaves the living room, keeping the entry door open.
I get up, excited and scared I move towards the outside of the house, in our new condominium.
I look around the street and see everyone is outside. Damian is standing with Marcus while Sammy and Maya talk across the street from me. Rian and Aiden are by the infirmary’s entrance.
“Maya, can we talk?” I ask her and she nods, I look at Damian again and notice he’s holding pressure to one arm. “Sorry, Sammy,” I say as Sammy steps aside to let us talk privately.
“I’ll go check on Dominik’s surgery status,” Sammy says and I thank her, giving her a small side hug before turning towards Maya.
“Rian already gave me the talk,” Maya says, displeased, her lips into a thin line, but she lets them shake slightly, barely when she looks in Marcus and Damian’s direction.
“I know. I’m not here to bother you. I’m here to warn you that no matter what’s happening between you and Damian, you clearly care-,” she almost stops me and lifts her hand to gesture but I hold her hand and put it down.
“Don’t deny. Even if there’s the scarcest possibility that you care, you should make Damian get his arm checked.
You know how our guys are, too proud to ever let anyone see them anything but perfect.
He’s pressing his arm. If he doesn’t check it, it might cost him his life.
If not by the injury itself, then by someone who knows about the injury and will use it against him,” I say and Maya looks up as if she’s gathering strength from God to make a decision.
“I’ll talk to him. You have to stop being so persuasive though.
It’s scary. You’re passing way too much time with Dominik,” she says and my heart migrates back outside my body to my feet, too tired to beat, too scared to be in place, like me.
So when Maya leaves. I take my heart and pace back and forth, forcing it to keep beating. There’s still a reason to keep beating.
“Keep fighting,” I whisper looking towards the infirmary, and I notice Aiden looking at me his ice blue eyes, for once don’t seem attacking, or conniving, or inquisitive, he looks concerned. “Not now, Aiden, please,” I ask but he keeps moving in my direction, he stays at a safe distance.
“I just wanted to say I’m sorry for overstepping.
Even though Dominik’s face was totally worth the beating, I’m sorry because I hurt you.
And I hope he gets better for your sake,” Aiden whispers and I just nod smiling at him for one second.
“If you ever do change your mind, I’m always here, little spark,” Aiden says and I punch him in the arm.
“I’m starting to think you’re a masochist.-”
“Perhaps you’re right. Who knows?” Aiden replies interrupting my line of thought and winks at me before sitting near my feet at the side of the road.
“I don’t know what to do, Dee. I’m lost. If I lose him-”
“You won’t. There’s no way in hell that guy is giving up on you,”
“Thank you, little Satan. I needed to hear that,” I whisper one tear falling, I clean it trying to stay composed. But as seconds turn into minutes, and minutes into hours of waiting. I’m losing my shit.
“Dad?” I call when I see him get out of the infirmary, I run towards him, my heart flipping. My dad takes his hands to his head, and I fall, or faint, or die. I’m not sure. Someone is holding me, yet I can’t tell who. It’s not him. It’s not his arms.
“No,” is all I manage to whisper, I hear voices around me but everything is muffled I can’t tell what they’re saying.
He’s not ok. He might not even be alive.
What the hell am I going to do? I succumb on top of my heart making it explode and all my blood stands on the floor, flooding everything, like Dominik’s must’ve been.